Are we dating or just hooking up quiz

Are we dating or just talking

we met at the campus bar back in november and we just talked and got to know each other a bit and danced, he asked for my number and immediately friended me on facebook. we like each other and he mentions he sees me as a friend but his actions says another. afterwards, i went to a bar with my friend and was texting him, he admitted that he thought we were sleeping together, but i told him no and that i would rather be doing that with him. after a few days, i kind of wanted to see him , cause i fell for him and been falling. even if you’re not sure how it will play out, you obviously want to try and make a go of it, or you wouldn’t be worried about scaring him off. we’ve had sex three times and i have a hard time reading his personailty. when we did he revealed to me that he had been thinking about me for the full 3 weeks and we made out again. we were both tipsy and yet sparks flew and we hit it off immediately, we basically just flirted like crazy until our friends had to pry us away from each other because it was closing time. we kept in touch a little, but he hooked up with other girls (which was part of the arrangement i stupidly suggested to protect my feelings). just little things like that really express how much he cares about me. but we were hanging out too much, too soon, multiple times a week. i have no idea what hes doing with me – when we hang out i have seen other women openly gape at him.. how do i tell if he just wants to kiss or is genuinely interested? however, i am “crushing” on this guy, but just want to understand him a little better. we talk more…he texts me more…if he happens not to be at my apartment…always tells me goodnight. before we hooked up, i asked him what his plans were then because he graduated that semester and he told me he was going to leave the country to teach english.  he text me after he t to ask if i was ok and i said well, yes but you did upset me. he then texed me that me and him have no future in bf or gf but if i would like a mess around with him then he would be fine with it. i kind of was expecting the worse, to not hear from him or see him again after having sex on the first date. there are so many guys willing to treat me right and take me out properly so if he’s not willing i dont want to settle for less- but i find it so hard to find someone i actually like… and i really liked/like him. the evening i received the text saying, “thanks for another lovely evening and night, i’ll leave at this date and wont be able to make the event, hope you had a good day?,i just want to mention that  i have a friend with benefits, and we both agreed that we are in it for the sex. i like that but the hooking up is appearing to be more than that and im fine with that as well its just he told me he wanted something causal at first and to see where it went because he just got out of a very long serious relationship with a girl he loved dearly who cheated on him and then played his heart, his exact words. at any time either of you could meet someone you like more. we had a huge talk a few days ago about where we’re at. if i make a decision now i could 1- lose a good man because i’m afraid of getting hurt or 2- i could stick it out and end up getting hurt. i emailed him the next day apologizing and don’t know how i took it that way and asked him what he meant by “where are we? he’s also mentioned on more than one occasion that he’s moving to the city where i live but that there’s been a bit of delay. i've like about your comments – the ones i've read this far – that they are not 'formula responses'. when were alone he shows affection also and we can just hang out without “hooking up”. i’m dating, meeting new people and traveling a lot. i found this website i’m super confused at my current guy situation. he said he cares for me, loves spending time with me and once he kisses and embraces me, he does feel things but just not the “marry me” things. fun: booty calls & friends with benefitsone-night stands: is it ever worth it? now not even a full week after we are both back on campus we were cuddling and watching a movie he tells me how he likes me as a “really good friend” i dont like the “just friends” thing… but he keeps saying “we’ll see” about me and him later on…(i am a bigger girl and im a bit clingy he wants me to give him space and lose weight. the probably here is that after that night i feel like i’m getting feelings for him. we texted the next day a good bit, and he admitted that he’s horny, which i accept and know – he’s a man! weeks have passed since you wrote so he’s probably made a move by now! i understood and we hooked up but at the same time it didn’t feel like just a hook up.. and that hasnt happened since we have been back at school for two weeks. we started hanging out a lot and i ended up dating his best friend, joe, after being introduced to everyone.. i just need more time and i want to take things slowly with you. i'm sorry, but nothing good whatsoever can come of that. he doesn’t text or chat me, but when we see each other out in public he’ll acknowledge me, give me a hug and talk for a bit. this went on for another day and then things returned to ‘normal’. a guy what he is looking for, or how he sees you is always easier before you have sex. like i said, this guy is giving a lot of mixed signals – it's impossible to say what he wants with the information here. but shortly after we started spending time together, things started shifting gear. i spent most of the last 5 years doing the single thing, dating, sleeping around, etc, mostly because i had my own issues i needed to work out and i wasn’t ready for a real relationship i guess. i know you don’t want to waste your time, but it sounds like he needs more time, and that’s not surprising after only three weeks. i know you dread it, but believe me, it is the only way forward. he said he thinks mqrrying a friene would be nice i asked him ifvwed date first and he saie yes and i asked if hed fheat and he said no. we just sat and watched tv for a few hours.. greet you a casual happy birthday or just leave the message on your phone, facebook wall or anywhere convenient to them. he is an artist and told me about his website etc, then i added him to facebook, then he started writing to me, all very nice and lovely stuff, he told he wanted to meet for a coffee which we couldn’t do as he was travelling a lot at the time.  i responded to his text, saying that we could try again for another date once he gets back into town. we have the same lunch and he will sit and stare at me and he goes out of his way to bump into me in the hallway.. both is hard for me)i keep thinking he doesnt want me because of my weight and he wants the skinny girl that he dated once upon a time she was engaged to her boyfriend but broke off that one when the guy im talking about went up for the summer… she is up in the northwest territories(canada) while me and him is in newfoundland. well he asked me out on a date, and we had sex that night. i don’t have a car and i don’t have any freedom in my house to go places or hang out with friends.  think of it like sweating out a particularly nasty virus. trust me, if he liked you you would be on his mind constantly, he would be texting you for “maintenance”, as in, “to see how you’re doing” [or check up if youre hooking up with another brother] … id say see what the vibes are like while you guys are both on break and then see how it is when you go back to school, but in the end you should definitely stand up for yourself<3. i’m not talking about playing major mind games – i’m talking about not laying all your cards out on the table too soon. there’s this guy who lives in my building whom i had seen around at the beginning the school year & we’d talk and stuff but we never really introduced ourselves till halloween night. divorced people who are good parents are very careful about introducing new partners into their child’s lives. they rely on ordering chinese takeout and watching bad pay-per-view on occasion, but more often than not, "dates" are merely a quick ice breaking at-home cocktail followed by a wild romp in the sack. shortly after he left work and i never seen or heard from again. if he is still texting, still flirting, he’s probably hoping to weaken your resolve and get you to have more sex with him, even though he has no intention of committing. he's always genuinely interested in what i have to say, what my plans are for the day, week, whatever, who i'm talking to, if any boys are pursuing me, etc. so i just replied thanking him for responding and and that i’m not the type to chase or be pushy and all about letting things flow. later that week with that on my mind i realized how i was always initiating and how i’m really falling for this girl. he said no because he was just out of a relationship and was really sorry. a year after we became friends we had out first kiss and it was perfect. what was suppose to be just an “eh whatever” situation, i now find myself thinking about him daily. said that’s fine, because deep down, i’m not the type to push people to doing things and i am a firm believer in letting things just happen. he started to pay me more attention starting where he had left off while in school. i can’t help but now get a sinking feeling she’s over it for some reason. he said he cared about me and my feelings and that if i ever felt unsure of the situation all i had to do was text or call and he would reassure me. he gets upset still though if i go out with friends or if he finds out another guy is interested in me. yet we’re both unsure as to when we will be seeing each other again until now…when i’ll be coming up for the weekend to see him (my mum wants me to go on a trip with her to the city where he lives…what perfect excuse to see him)for the past three weeks he’s all i could think about, i could barely eat or sleep and i feel really energized. over a year has gone by and he finally sends me an email, but he didn’t say anything, just sent me a link he wanted me to see about his experiences there. i’m so confused but really feel that there is something there between us. it was so sweet, and from then on we have hung out so very often. we knew of eachother in school but never really talked then. about two nights later i hung out with her and she ended up taking me back to her place where we made out for a good while during the week i text with her most days joking and flirting, but find myself initiating almost all of the conversations. so andrew and i talked every single day all day via text, sometimes on facebook chat, and he would call me every few days and every time he went out drinking. i don’t buy that crap and i have had enough of men using me for my kind and generous nature. need to understand something – this is important: it does not matter if he kisses the tip of your nose, your eyelids, stares at you while you sleep, strokes your hair, spoons, cuddles, says i love you once while drunk. there are only three things that bother in all this: 1) he’s always afraid we’ll walk into someone we work with and they’ll discover our litte thing. i did talk with him a few months ago and he talked to me like everything was fine and he wanted to joke with me about something we used to tease eachother about. i found out he was on a dating website meeting other girls, but he would say ” don’t worry it’s not going to work out” i don’t know why he kept telling me that. we share alot of the same interests, but i don't quite understand his angle or what he wants. may just be a case of bad timing, in which case you might choose to generally slow things down and keep things friendly but not sexual.  its also important to know that i initiated the fwb arrangement as i am tired of being lonely, thought he is sexy/attractive and he’s always been kind to me. we get a long really well and i watch his two adorable kids for him sometimes.!I wish i could just look in a crystal ball and penetrate his mind, but i cannot. when they accuse him of hooking up with another girl he explains to me that thats not what happened, that he didnt do that. moving along here, a, started to keep his distance from me after things got really difficult for me, and during a few life challenges. i have three weeks of winter holiday in which i wont see him, and im not sure how to approach the new year with him.. he doesnt want to be with in public but pretty much every one knows we are hooking up and our friends know about each other as well.? should i just ask him, or is it too soon? he says i should come next time because it’ll be more fun with me. but it also is clear that he's not ready for another relationship.’s top-ten list notwithstanding, i recommend you brush up on your greek – philia, agape, eros, the three words for love. i don’t think he drove down for another reason because his brother ended up going to visit his family for the holidays a few days after that so i took it that the main reason he came down was for me. think it’s fantastic that you initiated, and that you asked up front about what he was looking for.: k see u in a bitwe hung out and it was once again back to normal, talked, cuddled, kissed, then he had to leave bc he had to run early in the morning (he does track)nothing sat, nothing sun. he went to london, and we had talked about continuing to see eachother, but not committed to it. just that we were exclusive, but not necessarily in a relationship. we actually dated a while back, but too long ago for there to be remaining feelings. things ended like that and didn’t talk to him anymore. the problem we ran into was after liking eachother so much. he said that he was sorry if he seemed distant right now and that his entire life is changing, so that’s all he can focus on at the moment. he left the next day to travel for a graduation present his parents gave him so didn’t hear from him for a couple weeks. as your flow chart points out, this will most likely end in a “date” or “dumped” conclusion.’ve been trying to let this go and i found your website and decided to just get it out one time in hopes of finally having some clarity! i don’t consider myself the normal everyday kind of girl and i have always found it hard to find someone who really understands me. sure, you can say “he knows it’s just sex and nothing more,” but you should be able to understand that once someone’s emotions start rolling the rational mind can’t make it stop. we went to three different bars, my place, went out to a restaurant for late night food, and then she spent the night. i know you said that is better to have the conversations in person but if i don’t heard from him by next week, do you think i should call him and ask if i was just a fling for him? anyway, since that all happened we seemed to have gotten really close. but he keeps hinting around that he wants to do intimate stuff this weekend…. in other words, don't move forward without him signaling a change of heart. i'm falling for my hookup and i'm sure if he's falling for me. but i bring it up because if your man is openly asserting his desire for sexual variety it’s going to be a long time or a lightning strike before he will work out that instinct to the point he’s comfortable with marital sexuality. i realized later that day that he was asking “what are we? thanks for answering to my previous mssg, i love reading your messages!!i have a looong story that i need to get off my chest! the sex problem between my husband and i never found resolution. probably a couple times every week just to say hi or catch up with whatever is happening to each other. when i asked him if we were on the same page he said he likes me alot and not to worry about anything. i realized i didnt like my bf the way i did before. like i had said before, i’m a big chicken. he would show up at the bars i was going to, come into rooms i was hanging out in at the fraternity, or appear next to me on the dance floor. that i hadn’t even thought about any of that and i’m just going with the flow. i can’t decide if he actually likes me, or he’s just using me for sex. i was angry and told him i had made a mistake and that i did have feelings for him. or he has a fear of commitment/doesn’t want to get hurt? i remember most of the conversation we had but there are parts that i don’t and that’s what’s killing me. but they aren’t heartbroken, or even close, if it ends. must add that i was not born nor raised here, english is my 4. but a guy who just enjoys being intimate with you will do them too.. i’m scared, what if he rejects meeting me, or what if he said he doesn’t know what to say anymore or anything. i thought we should probably get onto the same page about this. arrives a little drunk since it was boys night out and honestly, i’ve had hookups before, and when my other fwb arrive, they weren’t like him. i had been keeping it a secret, but he apparently told a bunch of his friends while i was gone the whole story, but said he had no feelings anymore. i found out it was because his ex girlfriend came back on the scene and he just cut me off without any explanation. to my questions, he answered he didn’t regret what had happened between us but it wasn’t the way he had wanted to do things; he said he liked me but it was complicated. how can he possibly know now whether he will want to commit or not…for some reason i have this idea that the more time we spend together, the more he will like me and he will magically end up falling for me. nothing happened between us but it was pretty obvious we both wanted to. right before the end of the 1st quarter when we were gonna be off for 3 weeks, we decided to end the friends with benefits thing. if i’ve been talking to a woman for “about a month,” and she and her friends invited me to a party, and then she refused to kiss me when we were alone, i’d take that as a serious rejection and that i had been friend-zoned. i suggested that maybe we should hang again sometime after i get back. when we used to hang out 4 years ago, it would basically always be to “have relations” but we used to talk on the phone a lot too.’m sorry to be harsh, but i have seen literally dozens, even hundreds of women convince themselves that guys care using this kind of evidence, only to learn that none of it meant a thing. really hope this works out, i know you like him a lot. he tried to forgive her but it wasn’t working and she decided to leave him for the other guy anyway. his “girlfriend” is the same girl that he dated in college broke up with every other day and now she lives in europe (we live in the us). i think you already know the answer, but you should clarify exactly what he’s thinking. for you for vocalizing your feelings, something many people can’t or won’t do because they are too afraid to face the action that might have to follow from the discussion.. ignoring him when he said hi to youthis isn’t like some dude you met in a bar that night. we watched tv and he did hold my hand, cuddle and we talked. it sounds like he’s just not eager to ramp up quickly into the day-to-day obligations of a hardcore ltr. we’ll jump ahead a bit and basically ever since then… we hung out all the time. i could always feel his eyes on me and i was always right when i checked to see for myself. most guys just hook up and move on or i guess the term ‘hit it and quit it’. seems we met during one of his diciest times, & i am not inclined to berate or have a tantrum, i just like to be able to draw some conclusions/assessments and then see what feels right and how to proceed. is the first time i date a man of this rare breed: an entrepreneur, a workaholic, and the frustrated artist in one package. you may not have already decided to date, but the only way that early sex works out is if both parties are seeking a relationship from the start. then in the morning she left and went off and i texted with her the next day. it's gotten to the point where it's just so hard to say no. the circumstances, im hoping he’d decided what he wants and weighed out the options before even trying to get involved with me again. i’m not worried about the age difference at all, but a guy that age is unlikely to want a serious commitment, especially if it involves the lives of three children. said no it was business what an earth was he talking about and we both laughed. i was gentlemanly at the time and said i understood and recieved a very passionate kiss outside her dorm but was left out in the cold with a major boner. think you should wait for him to re-initiate before you send any “miss him” texts or whatnot. but the next night we arranged to go out again.” i tried to pursue the topic further by asking why he cares about my happiness all of a sudden, nothing seemed to stop him from meeting other girls just two months ago. my friends told me to let it go and/or just follow my heart but not to listen to anyone, just myself. then i changed my mind and we went out but i was honestly not ready. we have become incredibly close, he’s introduced me to his best friends and i have introduced him to my best friends (my roomates, and he has become extremely close to them in particular), we spend most of our time around each other, preferring to study with each other and hang out with each other. me and my coworker were very flirty from the beginning and all our coworkers would joke about us but nothing had ever happened at that point. is this guy confused, screwed up, not into me, the two times he brings up the conversation about us he trys to see whats happening and if all is ok etc but we just go round in circles. for the record, talking on the phone all the time is not any form of commitment or sign that he wants you for more than a f*ckbuddy. it’s clear you’ve been anxious about this almost from the start – that’s a drain of emotional energy that is just not healthy. so i texted him, telling him that it made me feel unsure of things when he was dismissive in person on occasion and that it made me worry that he didn’t mean the things he said about caring about me. according to him now, he hasn’t been with anyone for two months. maybe he likes me but doesn't want a relationship right now or maybe he's hooking up with other girls, though i haven't seen him acting interested in other people.  anyway during the conversation he said he thought it best to keep it as it was cos he didnt want to start feeling jealous if i was having dinner with a guy etc…… (does this mean that deep down he was jealous about my business dinner with a guy), he also said the only time things would go wrong is if i developed feelings for him and he got with another girl, i turned the tables and said what if he fell in love with me and that he’d then end up hating me if i didn’t feel the same. we continued to text/talk on the phone for the next couple of weeks, we discovered that he knows my ex, and that i know his family. he is going away for a few weeks in a few days, i also heard from another mutual friend that for a long time he has actually been quite low in mood, up and down and in one of their conversations he said i want to fall in love etc. i said that i understood, i just needed some reassurance sometimes that it wasn’t just meaningless sex. or do i break the silence and at least try for a real date? 1 week later we met at a show again, i was pretending not to be very interested, he was very interested, then again a few days later at something else, again i was pretending and he was wandering around me, i left early, about which he was very surprised, and next day in the morning he texted me saying it was great to see you, etc etc have a nice day, i replied with a very casual text. anyway, within the following week, i invited him twice to some events, but he had excuses, then he went for travelling for work again for 10days, did not really initiated any contact but just replied to my very few messages. whenever i talk about guy friends, he always wants to know more, or if they’re gay. you have the right to be angry, frankly, or at least annoyed that he is stringing you along without an explanation. his last disappearing act resulted in his apology (which came about on his own), it wasn’t to be take personally and i deserve to know so since we are an intimate relationship and it’s something he does every now and then. you say we should always keep dating and meet guys as long as we’re not agreed upon being exclusive, and i assume that goes for guys too? nothing happened between us but it was pretty obvious we both wanted to. he tells me he doesn’t know where we’ll go but until then, he just isn’t ready right now to ask me out. he claims he really wants to be friends no matter what happens because he wants a relationship in the future when i have freedom to go out with him and his friends, but i have grown feelings for him now. and to answer your question i do like this guy. i mustered up the strength and asked him if we could progress and become official today and he said. when we are together in his room hanging out he compliments me and he is always so cute- and we don’t always hook up sometimes we just talk and cuddle. actually bought a new couch for the room with the fireplace since he didn’t have any furniture in there.:just hadnt heard from u in a while thats all. but since we dated for 3 years, i feel like i don’t even know how to date anymore. to the world of middle-aged husbands served with divorce papers from their bored wives. we are the only ones that we are sleeping with so it is a mutally exclusive sex “relationship thing” (i don’t know what to call it. if he wants it to last forever, and you would love to be with him, what’s the problem? all of a sudden out of the corner of my eye i notice this guy. having kids makes the decision huge for both of you. is tough, because it’s a weird mix of not knowing what the other person is thinking, even though it’s someone you’ve known well. we work with all these amazing foreign women who are so much younger than me and they flirt with him all the time, and hes naturally charming, but he always ignores it. is very complicated, and most people are not cut out for it.” i said i guess i would and he said well, you never know you might find a man, fall in love, get married, and move to somewhere like ______”.  we chatted about work etc, i said i’d been really busy, had a dinner meeting with a guy, got the contract signed etc and was really pleased……. does your favorite kylie jenner lip kit shade say about your love life? and his words and his actions don't match up (ie i want to be single, but i'm going to treat you like my girlfriend). i met him almost a year ago and he liked me right from the start, but unfortunately i was still not over another guy. to my knowledge, he’s not flirting or hooking up with anyone else. invites you to his son’s graduation – so he’s also been married before – and says he doesn’t want to share you.” over the last month of school (we’re in college) we’re hooking up and he’s exhibiting a fair number of these signs (affectionate, cares how i feel, etc. he said that before he even met me he wanted to be single for awhile.

We dating or just hooking up

the whole night although less conversation, all our sexual exchanges (i’m not going to get graphic) were not typical to someone you randomly sleep with, or not in my previous encounters. however, since the sex has been amazing, and because of the signs i’ll list below, i’m now on the fence about him. i guess what i’m wondering is, if he’s just in it for the hookup or how to realize if he wants more. we were just finishing eachothers sentences and just talking in general. i knw this might just be a for fun thing which imvfine with begause im singal and i lve cuddlikg and kissing. evidence for (1): you’re quite defensive about jesus’ assessment that you’re just boning. another striking example was during this one night my guy and i were at the library and i went to find a book and another random guy came up to me and started chatting, asking me about my program, and when the library closed etc. we are about the same age and both from latino backgrounds. did talk about been exclusive with each other, he told me he wasn’t seeing or talking to anyone else and that yes we are exclusive. real problem with fwb is that no matter what rational boundaries are set, the hindbrain does what it wants, and odds are somebody’s going to want more. i met this guy a few weekends back when my friend and i went out party hopping. we ended up just hanging out like the first time and it felt the same. really dont know how to approach this i know hes said some things before and came crawling back to me but i dont want to be used for just sex. just can’t see falling for a woman who’d fuck for three years a guy she shows no inclination for more with. ive been running a google search on ‘how to tell if your fwb/hookup is into you’ and voraciously trying to find some kind of relevant commentary on my situation 🙁 i noticed in the comments that you have been so generous to assess personal issues, and so i was hoping you could help me out with a current issue im facing- i would appreciate any and all help, thank you! well now its my second year in college and we reconnected over the summer and have been texting and flirting. we spend every weekend together, sometimes he’ll get off work (his work is midway between his home and mine) and spend a night over during the week. i wait for contact and then wait to respond for 15 min to an hour to let him know i’m not sitting on the phone, and i am being very upbeat. we both made it clear that we only wanted a physical relationship because of both of our busy lifestyles (both being single parents) and because of the possibility of a conflict of interest because he knows my ex. he came round about 9pm ish, we chatted, got fruity chatted more got very fruity & had mindblowingly good sex a number of times. saturday and sunday evening till morning just having breakfast and talking. it’s something you’ll just have to wait out, that’s the price of freedom, the same freedom that gives us the chance to choose our own partners. we are still hanging out every weekend, i went to his place, i even met some of his friends when we went to a concert but still no kissing, holding hands, no sex, any of that.. i took it as a way of him to gauge how i’d react and how i felt for him in return. and i just felt like it's not that he didn't want a girlfriend, he just didn't want me as his girlfriend and it's just so hard to wrap your head around something like that. i have had guys do all the the above but they were total crazy muffin cheaters.. just about a month and a half ago my now ex boyfriend of 4 years left me for someone else. the two of you should spend plenty of time doing other things before you try for sexual intercourse. last night he came over to my place and the same thing happened, but we ended up hooking up. he told me he just wanted to be single, he told me i deserved better. i know he was gone for awhile and trying to get everything straight now but it doesn’t look like he’s working or going to school, not really sure. it was going on like this for a while, and i was able to let this happen without feeling anything for him, but then i started getting feelings for another friend of mine. he was living at home so i wasn’t able to see him until he told me he was going to be in town and wanted to see me so we set a date and made plans to see eachother. in fact, i think it’s very odd when people get really close and are spending a lot of time together and don’t talk about what they’re doing, or try to define it in some way. you can’t get serious reassurance from this guy very soon, in the form of his trying hard to be in a relationship, my advice is to walk. we’ve met on another birthday the following week and he seemed really ‘friendly’ (even flirty, i guess). the past two months, he comes rushing in once per month, only to ignore me for the next 4 weeks, and as soon as he feels my distance, he comes rushing back, only to ignore me again for the next 4 weeks. my friends and i were at a restaurant and we seen two guys that kept looking at us and smiling. you need to let him know you are looking for more. when i think about hooking up, and my own past experiences, what he did was so far from what i consider a hook up. so we ended up doing something he goes this could be a date right. that intense chemistry came to a halt with him in bed, he genuinely couldnt perform in bed for more than 30 seconds before…. this comment box is not long enough for me to explain everything that went wrong in my marriage, and everything that i put up with to make sure that our kids his and mine got off to college.. totally forgets about your birthday and when they realise, ask if you would want to “celebrate” later. then he wanted to shower which was just fun, playing around, no sex. one night we were making out and i got scared that he might think this is just a hook up. he sqid he wasvhorny cuz hes been having sex lately. his age is obviously a huge factor – i advise 21 year-old women to stick to guys 25 and older. i feel hopeful that maybe he does feel more for me than he is letting on but feels like a relationship would distract him from his goals. still, that week i got a few questionable texts, again hinting that he may have deeper feelings for me. we did end up fooling around (by fooling around i mean kissing, heavy petting, some oral) minimally and he cuddled me all night. and he proposed that we stay friends because he will be gone and being in a relationship will distract him from the exchange program we’re in. within a couple, however, getting to know each other is a form of foreplay. well, the longest we went without talking was 2 days and he would text me but after we started having sex, his talk mostly consisted of sex; but other than that, he was always nice to me. also i haven’t introduce him to my friends either because i don’t know if i should introduce him as a friend or boyfriend. do their close friends think of or say about you? told him i saw this headed in a bit more of a serious direction and that i was upset. before thanksgiving time however, he stopped texting as much and would respond bluntly to anything i say like a simple “mkay,”so we hung out in his room and kissed friday, then saturday i initiated texting 5:00pm. and it looks like he isn’t keeping up anymore with his online journal and almost like he’s disappeared. it shows him that his wants and needs are more important than yours and will come first. so, we cuddled that night and we had sex again this past friday.. cold or not feeling well, what does he initially do? i had met her once or twice before (very briefly) through a mutual friend a few years back. susan, one of my girlfriends left you a question over a year ago and i see your advice was well received. a college man will not play to the idea he’s supposed to generate the social life for his girl, you need to bring him into your life as much as the other way around., we moved to his room where things started up again. we hang out at the same bar and obviously see each other when we are outside at our houses. because it sounds like you’re in one and you just don’t want to say it. i still haven’t met his family or friends and he hasn’t ask me to be his girlfriend. the fwb code reframes that person as “in the wrong” for breaking the agreement, but it’s an agreement that can’t be legislated so to speak. he still wanted to talked to me but i needed time and after a few days, i initiated the conversation to let him know that i got over it and that we could talk. he said that he was more of an asshole than he used to be, but that it didnt mean he didnt care. i didn’t think he would last with her anyway so i wasn’t really worried but i guess i just didn’t bring it up to him or i just blocked it out. we are both very busy-he works full time, and i am a full time student. we have both said we don’t want a heavy relationship, he says he can’t stay over cos then feelings will develop? i don’t know whether he used you and wants more, but it seems like he is asking you to make a big change without putting in any effort himself. when he touches me, genuinely i know that he loves me, perhaps he isn’t ready for what that means, and what it can bring down on both of us. currently, we have hung out a lot more, just the two of us, or with his friends, or mine., i have seen him he has just gone and to be honest i am now even more confused than i was before. you have feelings for him, so any time you spend in a dead end relationship is bad for you. i was still pretty sure he would have just wanted sex. we talked online after that and he made last minute plans to come hang out at mine but they fell through. i took it wrong because i had just gotten out of a long distance relationship and probably wasn’t ready to open up then. grab the rss feed or sign up for email if you like! forgot to say that when was out on a walk a woman went by he commented about her cheast i said was ah right he was like it is an guy thing did your ex not say stuff about other woman i said no he did not he said probably was too scared to and made privite joke we had about my ex that he started i lauthed abit never mentioned any woman again but none went by really then we walked on also he hardly looks at me or holds my hand unless i hold his first. sometimes it seems as if were heading towards a relationship then other times it seems as if we are what we are. am a bit torn, as i don’t know if he is doing these things because he knows i am a woman ( 🙂 ) and that we “need these things”.: just chilling out in my dorm for now haha what are you up to? he is too, but let’s face it, a woman’s number carried more weight, and possible backlash, than a man’s. we exchaned a couple of text messages over the weekend and everything seemed to be fine. i should mention that i am a woman and my lover /fwb is a friend as well as coworker. i’ve had opportunities to be in relationships with other men, committed ones, but i’ve all but chased them away because they don’t compare to him. however, it he has already started seeing someone else i would definitely consider it over. apologized for not talking and said “im sorry i just been super busy 🙁 i hope you forgive me”. i played it very cool until a week after i became very upset. it's kind of hard for me to accept, though, because of the way he treats me when we're together. we all ate dinner and at this point daughter and i have bonded quite well. timing isn’t great, because you’ve just been hurt.’s not necessarily a mind game, it may be that he just isn’t sure. we haven’t really gone on many dates, but we hook up and sleep together on the regular now. you should only be there as long as your relationship is satisfying and fulfilling for both of you.@freshlostby now you probably have your answer about what’s going on with this particular guy.” since friday he has also been texting me “sweet dreams” every night. before anything major happens however, every time, he holds my hand and we just lay there. honestly, you deserve a man who will be honest and straightforward, commit to you, enjoy sex and be willing to express love. sometimes i think he really wants a relationship, and then he will do something that just indicates the opposite. so here’s my question…what are we doing then? thing is, i don’t know what he’s thinking or feeling about me. he seems to be comfortable, does not even make plans ahead of time as his weekend is pretty much free and i select which day/time is good for me.'s my second visit within 6 months and now i actually feel compelled to ask a question / request advice since i find myself rather perplexed by this man's behavior. it sounds like he was attentive when it was strictly fwb, and perhaps less attentive now that you want more? but it’s very important to make a woman earn your affection. hes also told me and expressed to me that he cares about me (though im not sure if he means on a friend level or on a romantic level). first few times together were kinda that “booty call” sex, but then it has kinda shifted to more passionate, almost intimate sex. i like you a lot and you are a good girl but i just can’t be in a relationship rightnow”. if he’s not really interested in spending much time together, except for sex, you’ll have your answer.  i know this contradicts my first post a bit but whilst having the chat i realised i would rather keep it as it is for the time being than not have him and that now we have given it the fb lable i could remove my feelings from the equation……but i am not sure that he can, which is exactly where i was in the beginning, he seemed so dejected, he was joking and fooling around about it – laughing etc like he was really hurt and even said i am going home now to feel shit about this. if he really had respected me and had feelings for me wouldn’t that question not make sense? i had a lot of questions but i didn’t want him to feel pressured or chased or whatever; i didn’t want to be demanding or push him for answers out of fear of chasing him away. but, i guess i just can’t seem to get a handle on the unconscious signals that i’m sending him.@darleneof course it could be something more, and there’s a good way to find out. then right after that he went to her and went to her locker and he paid her attention and totally avoided me like i was nothing and it did hurt. he asked me to go to a concert with him next week that's out of state, said that i should come and there's room in his car for me. and today understands what went wrong, but if i get too close to him, although he says that he wants to work on our marriage, he gets angry and lashes out at me. we again hooked up but we still talked for hours still trying to ask me questions and figure me out. is never too soon to ask a man what he’s looking for – you ask when you need to know. now that you have hooked up, he will either back off or continue his interest. i don’t want to create problems where there are none, or end things out of fear if there’s real potential. that is something way out of character for me, but it just sorta happened. we started drinking together after that and i went home with him, where he cooked food and we went to bed. work, his age, his indifference and the intensity of what i feel for him, and what a does not feel for me is soul consuming. i was really upset because i felt like he was lying to me just to keep me around (for sex perhaps). thank you so much for showing the light to so many women all over the world. when he answers that question, you need to believe him, as long as his actions match what he says.) well, i’ve known him for years but not well, just from school. he agreed and we started spending nights seperately and texting less. invited him when his friend was also coming, he was working, couldn’t make it, and no contact again. after all, they feed them the information almost every time they hang out. next day via sms he was messaging about how he had such an amazing time and how much fun we had. i liked him enough that i would have worked with it & keep trying with him, but after that we never talked about it and he wanted to stop hooking up- i got the impression he was discouraged. i volunteer at a hospital, and one day a man begged me to take him off life support. perhaps he is just wanting to be a nice friend or he’s trying to establish some sort of friends with benefits with me. is it worth sticking around and seeing where things go or are they not ever going to go anywhere? and im afraid its a long story but i’ll try to condense it. after 5 days of not saying anything, he sends me a text 11:30 tuesday night saying “hey stranger”this is how it went. however, he does not respond to my emails or texts when i send them (only 1-2 per week… just to share something or even to ask something quick! when things first started i told him i wanted a relationship, but he told me he was not looking for a girlfriend. i understand there’s an element of the forbidden here, and that is very enticing, but a secret relationship can’t really grow in a healthy way, and secret fwb?’m sorry, but if you expressed your confusion and he did not say anything, i’m afraid you have your answer. i talk about him, we spend time together, go out, eat, do the dirty, talk, yadda. then i agreed to be friends with benefits again considering the one week relationship we had already brought so much tension and drama between us. did you want to take a break/stop seeing each other for bit? perhaps because we didn’t have sex this has fallen apart…. he never went to the locker when i did he waited off from a distance until i was gone. to be perfectly honest, part of my obsession with him is probably my thing for game-playing and drama; several of my friends whom i discuss with (and have only seen pictures) say “you are way to good-looking for him”, “he needs to make you his girlfriend”. his body language was the same as when we initially began, very zoned in and focused on me, he’d brought up things that reminded him of me, and repetedly showed that he cared and approved of the little things he somehow knew i’ve been up to recently. later i had found out that he was also in a relationship with a girl he’d been with for about 5 years. he is really bad at talking about anything serious, not even just relationship stuff. i’m not sure if i was used for a ride or if he actually likes me and really wants me to move up there or what. then i ended up talking a day or two later with our mutual friend who had talked to her about the events of saturday night and said that the girl really loved the affection and cuddling was fine with me not coming but that she had also said that she wasn’t looking for affection. i just said no and asked why he ignored me. since you don’t either, you will just have to ask him, and i would strongly suggest having this conversation in person.’s totally fallen for you, he’s head over heels. we became fast platonic friends and we got along great. cringed when i read this because it seems crystal clear to me that if, after 3 yrs, your only clues about how he feels relate to his sexual repertoire, then he’s only in it for the sex. however, we became close after that, and for two weeks straight we spent almost 24/7 with each other – classes, studying, sleep-overs, and sex. he cared about whether i was having a good time or not (whereas before it just was so long as he was happy, hah) and for the first time he stayed all night and slept beside me all cuddly. it was going great until this past friday night @ around 2 am, (we both occasionally get insomnia so we hang out really late) we both wanted to hang out and he suggested we drink (he had said something about me trying smoking & me trying drinking prior to this night). you don’t see him as a friend, you have strong feelings for him.-he brought me to meet his family who lived 4 hours away (for thanksgiving).  does he want me to say, actually i really have developed some feelings for you and want to see if we are good together or does he want me to end it. couple of weeks ago i saw my “whatever he is” and we had a horrid evening, he really upset me and was just in a nasty mood. in other words, he already knows if he likes you, and now you just have to find out. he’s been very sweet too with his messages, asking about work showing concern about whether i’ve had enough sleep or food. but isn’t that the moment when you don’t care what others think anymore, and you say how you really feel? i said,am new to casual dating so i cant tell the difference at all. this is unfair to you if you would rather move forward! now he only just got out of a 1 and a half year relationship so i am extremely worried i may be his ‘rebound girl’. i don’t hear often from women that guys have been pursuing for two years. like him alot, i’d love to have a commited relatioship with him and see where it went, he makes me laugh, when we talk on the phone i have an amazing grin on my face, he compliments me, says i look amazing, he can’t keep his hands off me, thinks about me all the time, up until sunday, used to text call all the time. when we are in class he will do things to get my attention and i will catch him staring at me out of the corner of his eye. once he went away for a few days and told me he missed me. last night he almost didnt meet up with me to get food and when i commented that he seemed like he was still annoyed with me (from a tiff we got on on wednesday) he was like no i am just fine with being friends or soemthing like that…i do the same thing to him because i told him when i was hooking up with this other guy a month ago before him and i started having sex again…since we have been hooking up again i havent talked to the other guy at all.  maybe this is just me but i also feel that when you both orgasm together there is something deeper involved than just “lets fuck and get our rocks off together” but like i said that could just be my way of thinking.  he texts me everyday without fail and calls me every week. i don’t ask him if he’s dating anyone else or how he spends his time (i really don’t want to know). know this forum is intended for girls, but i feel that you could probably help shed some light on my situation. he wasn’t looking for a relationship he just got out one at the time and so did i, but we hang out a lot still do til this day. saw him a few days after that and we hooked up again. yes, we kissed passionately (no necking)…and yes he asked if i wanted to spend the night to which i politely declined, after which we had breakfast…. i also enjoy his company so much, particularly the hooking up. we still talk, but i’m nervious, don’t know what to do when i see him next time, help please….” he might say, “i have feelings for you” or he might say “it’s fun, but i’m not looking for anything more. kissed passionately…(no sex, nor did he pressure or ask me for it unlike our first date when we kissed and he sort of “tested” me and asked if wanted to spend the night). he tells me he misses me and little stuff like that and no he doesnt come and see me because the job he has he works 7 days a week. after we were married, 1 year into the marriage, he stopped having sex with me, and kept photos of his x-wife of 15 years in a shoe box in our bedroom closet, not to mention old cards, letters and photes of his x-wife, even as i threw them out after i discovered them, he kept digging them out of the trash. my friends think im crazy and delusional that if we were meant to be together then we would be by now. contact between us was way more strained and awkward, but we hung out a couple times in the month following the breakup. next night we had a very intense two hour fool around session in which he told me he is not looking to be in a relationship and that he isn’t sure that i can keep my emotions seperate and that he doesn’t want to hurt me… i told him that i could just have fun and things have been progressing from there…since then we have been fooling around every now and again as well as having some sexually charged conversations via text message. you’re young at 24 but you shouldn’t even consider spending a year or two with this guy if he’s not ready for something serious. again i’d like to say before, during, and after the intimate time, we still had a full on conversation catching up and he was still asking me questions and questions still wanting to know more about me. we always chatted about those things in private, in person, and we were in public when we saw eachother. be patient, and if it doesn’t work out, move on. we hadn’t seen each other for years until recently where i ran into him at a bar. but i am really falling for this guy and i don’t know if he is too or just wanting to a permanent hook up here. and have been 2-3 timesa a week for the past 3 years. he even admitted like he felt he loved me (in which i rationally just thought was cute, but didn’t buy cuz it was too soon). it doesn’t need to be hostile, just an honest statement that the fwb is not working for you anymore. however, i’m aware that it’s not realistic to expect women to have “the talk” in the first few weeks. i agreed being as i myself had just gotten out of a long term relationship. anyway, we made plans to hangout when he got back into down, went to dinner early that week and hungout the next week after that non stop and continued to hangout.'s of course – so he seems – quite mortified about what has happened (him not showing up, nor calling). uncomfortable as it will be for you, i think you deserve to know what’s going on and i think you will have to ask. i asked somebody was he dating someone to be curious because he shouldn’t be that close to me like he is.  prior to us getting together he had been chasing me for a good 6 months…. whatever happens, you need to be prepared for it and not take it to heart. my husband was secretly hooking up with his x-sister in-law,  for moral support he says, but it was more of a bash me fest. i would suggest moving forward with your own life, but remain friendly and keep the lines of communication open. a week or so later we went on a trip to vegas with all our mutual friends. after 5-6 dates we have not be “physical” yet, apart from some kissing, as he seems respecful and somewhat conservative. anyway, we mutually decided to meet up for a few beers and just chat/get to know one another. we never actually dated, probably because he is two years younger than me so i felt weird about it or something. we’ve making plans for the fourth of july with your family… we’re not having sex like rabbits anymore so…. reading this i was thinking about a guy i have been seeing, in a casual, physical manner (sporadically over long time), but last time i saw him things went different.?First, i think you need to ask him point blank if he still feels the same way he did at the beginning, or if his feelings about a relationship have changed.

I am looking for a free dating site

Are we dating or hooking up quiz

it just doesn’t work to spend this kind of time together and have no idea what the other person is thinking, especially if you find yourself bonding with him. what you’re describing can basically just be a needy insecure guy. is it too soon to tell him i’m falling for him? this time, we were touching foreheads for a good minute and even eskimo kissed afterwards., should i ask him next time i see him in person or is it ok if i just ask him over the phone? i would like to be exclusive and start a relationship, so maybe i should just give it more time.  i think it may be that he found the relationship factor to be a complete turn-off. we’d share ohotos of our voyage, and soeak of how we missed we missed eachother. one night he took me to a party and when we left we were alone in his care and we um… well you know :p i felt a bit bad because i didn’t want to begin it like that. but regarding point 9 – wouldn’t it be very ambitious to expect him to drop every other girl and not have interest in others and go for me, when we haven’t gotten further than we have? for a week again no contact, a few days ago we met again at an event (i know we are a bit sociable:), he was around me constantly, lots of questions etc, then i went to his place with him and few friends who also live with him, on our way he was holding my hand, hugging me, and at some point, one of our friends cheekyly said something like, “there is something special about you, he never changes his mind for me although i’m his best mate” when we were talking about his date of next work travel, i wanted him to leave a few days later so that he can come to an event with us:).’m going to make a post about this – look for it later today.. clumsily and reluctantly offers their jacket or drape it over your shoulder. he just said he had no minutes left on his phone. i saw him again by chance, and we decided to make plans to hang out. they said yes, they were mutual friends, so all was good. i forgot how much we clicked when we first met two months ago. so another guy got involved we was just talking from hereand there and my crush had found out. i moved away to uni and used to write him letters (which i found out a lot later he had kept them all) and we’d talk on the phone lots. i encourage you to lay it out for him and see where his head is. anyways, before i left i asked him when he was going to move back here and he said he wasn’t sure, indefinitely. all of this we contuined to have amazing sex, very sensual – i would almost say even lovingly which has def happened before. now, he was not married at the time he first began pursuing me- he broke up w/ his now wife, for a time, in order to do it, but then, a few months later, decided to marry her because he accidentally knocked her up. he always asks me question after question after question about me, almost like i don’t even get a chance to answer his questions because he keeps asking more! you find out it wasn’t dating when he hooks up with someone else, which is his right if there was no official commitment. there is no way around the dreaded talk – that just creates a “don’t ask, don’t tell” situation – one that in my experience, nearly always works out poorly for the woman. sad to say, we’ve never been on an actual “date”.“once after a fight he said that it hurts, cause probably he has feelings for me.) he mentioned it again before he left, and was still being very sweet and kissed me goodnight. casual sex couple time couple time and romance couples and sex dating dating tips friends friends with benefits love and sex relationship tips relationships relationships and sex romance sex sex tips. because of his work, he’ll be leaving in some months far and for very very long. now i might want more…and i don’t know whether i am reading too much into his actions and words, or whether what i am seeings is really there…we talk everyday, we cuddle a lot and spend time together without always having sex, he tells me “i am his” , that he misses me and likes me and spending time with me. i feel like alone we get along great when he lets his guard down we are so compatible but in public is a whole other story we have never been out together on like a “date” and if we bump into eachother while we are out clubbing or at an event he never approaches me just stares and watches my every move! i had a feeling that she wasn’t going to be there any longer or he lost interested.  over the next few days i got the silent treatment, eventually i text and then it all seemed to et back to normal. husband and i recently separated and are getting divorced; basically i am not going back to that relationship.,me and my hook up have been hooking up for a few years, roughly 3 years now. we went star-gazing again and he kissed me and held my hand & wanted to know about my past relationships and stuff. the both times we have hooked up, we just kissed, the first time he didn’t try anything more but the second time he wanted sex. when i was pregnant we were still not hooking up or kissing or anything and even when i would spend the night there we would sleep on opposite sides and not cuddle or anything. i asked pint blank if clothed outings were out of the question, and he said he’d love to hang out, and that hadn’t been his intent. bring it up next time you see him, and say that you don’t want to be demanding or a nag but you’d like to talk to him on the phone (make it sound like something you’d enjoy rather than a demand on his time). talked to him yesterday (monday), he told he wanted to see me and that he would call me, he knows that today and tomorrow i was off but i didn’t heard a from him today 🙁 do you think he lost interest or he is just busy…? for the advice, i kind of think the same but one feels more comfortable when ideas are confirmed by someone from outside the problem, who sees it in an unbiased manner. finally two weeks ago we went for drinks (he seemed to be really nervous the whole time and had a little too much to drink). he ended up with a girlfriend anyway and i was okay with that because i didn’t have feelings for him- i was just attracted to him. he kissed me goodbye a few times deeply before he got out. he apologized for the late response and hopes everything is well with me. longer story short, the co-worker who we will call a. i said all was fine and that i really liked him and the “relationship” we have at the moment is great. i think that in view of the way things have developed, he could not expect me not to want to be exclusive and, as he said, “it comes with the territory. but then when we came back from the break, he asked me out. i feel trapped in the middle of this emotional storm, and many times just crawl into bed feeling so defeated. and don’t wait forever – at some point he needs to go all in, or you’re just wasting your time. at the start of july on a night out (we hang out at the same places so we always bump in to each other), i threw caution to the wind and tried to kiss him. then there is: he says he is really not into sex, even though we often do that at least once a day with his initiation. i’d give it till friday morning before reading it as a lack of interest. if you have a date for wednesday, he will likely be in touch monday or tuesday to confirm and make arrangements. i cannot afford it always (i wish i could), but i feel so bad when he pays. we talked about the lack of time issue and i said well if i met someone i really wanted then i suppose i’d make time for them and that obviously i haven’t met that person yet, he then asked if i’d have a relationship with him, i said yes he asked why and i said cos we get on really well, he is my kinda normal with good values/morals etc and the sex is great. but she was only there for a few months into the start of our emails and i guess she left. later on i found out he had a girlfriend, and had been with her for almost 6 years. he pretends he’s joking and playful but i know he’s honestly asking for the real truth. and i know how much it seems like he just came to me because he knew i'd say yes, and i feel like shit about that. he readily admitted that he’s attracted to me, and he talks to me one-on-one when we’re out with friends, but no pda. i met this guy that came into my work, and we talked for a while, went back to his house, he cooked dinner, and we just talked the whole night, the night ended with a kiss and nothing else. regarding your list – if by “falling for” you mean falling in love, i think that might be a bit soon in my case. he smiles at me when i look back at him and it makes me feel quite embarrased :o also after we have sex he wants to hold me and kiss me, he wants to make conversation afterwards also. this shocks me since we just had the conversation we did and we get in a fight about it. we text each other every day, and call every other day. reminds me… every time we’re at a party, the whole night his eyes are on me, and they oddly appear as if they’re smiling. you’re having great sex, but are afraid to say you care for him. we had sex again and again there was more of a connection than the times last year.. doesn’t mind if you are cold or not feeling well or what. not wanting to be seen with you in public is a major red flag and also offensive. a similar argument could be made for why beta supplication doesn’t work on young women seeking risk and novelty in their men. although, he said,”it’s not that he wouldn’t think of me as a gf or w/e.. ok, i understand what you’re saying, susan, thank you for your help:) i usually am direct with people, but find it extremely difficult to be direct with him; partly because of my attraction to him, but also partly because he’s very sensitive and gets his feelings hurt easily. so now with the year almost at an end and him being a senior i dont know what to do. if you really do want nsa, the right thing to do is bump back on his behaviors and tell him they are inappropriate for an nsa “relationship. we sit next to each other 8 hours a day at work and hang out sometimes on our spare time, whether it be weekends or weekdays. it means that every day or other day he’s sending a note. out of the blue he tells me  last week that he misses me and wants to come to be with me. so we started play wrestling and tickling each other and ended up hooking up. i really wanted to and i guess i couldn’t be tough about it anymore! anyway, about a week later he decided to call me. players in a hookup situation don't make "plans" ahead of time because their goals are to fulfill a sexual need or to use the hookup partner as a fill in.. but im afraid to ask my friends about it bc i feel like they are judging me for kissing him/making out wednesday night and him not being my boyfriend. so affectionate, and we slept together that night too, and he was very touchy-feely. so when i moved back i wrote a letter and sent it to where he worked. if he or you remain adamant that a relationship is not a good idea, then i can’t see anything but heartache ahead for at least one of you. operating the marriage requires a lot of time and effort, and most men are pragmatic and want to build up other enterprises in their lives before they devote the bulk of their effort to that one. and after 2 days, he texted me again last night and was flirting a little bit and i made it clear to him that i “used to” like his dirty talk and he got the point when he said ” well, i don’t think you do now that’s why i said ‘used to’. so we got together, and ultimately it ended in us having sex, really really great sex if i do say so myself! should i ask him by email because it s not easy for me to ask on phone.” i am just so confused as to what is going on. during those 3 years he was truck with cancer, and i was there for him, and a was there for me, as best as he could. well that first weekend we ended up sleeping together and he made it clear he wasn’t interested in me bc he started hooking up with another girl in our class. his father found out, an was very offended, by still provided me with a promotion, and i was so grateful that he continued to believe in my work and leadership. susan,i met this guy about a month ago, we meet on a dating website.  he proceeded to apologise and ask if i could forgive him, i replied that i would but that i was not sure i could mea meaningless f*** anymore as i had developed some feelings and thought we should end it before i got hurt. he is always texting me, he tells me that he misses me through out the day, has a nickname for me, he comes over after he is done with work, picks me up from work sometimes, has introduced me to his daughter and close friends which he considers family. i’ve known him for 3 months now, and in the beginning, he told me that we could only be friends, that he likes me but his “gut” tells him we could never be together, that there is a difference between liking and being in love. although, once after a fight he said that it hurts, cause probably he has feelings for me. we made out, and afterward he gave me his #, and for the next few days he kept in touch. it sounds like you are falling for him, so you need to know asap if he feels the same way. susan,so i met a guy a couple months ago and we had been talking regularly for about a month. he apologised for the way he’d treated me and said hed missed me too. the thing is, he hasnt formally asked me out on any dates, or expressed that he wants to be in a relationship with me. we’d actually known each other for 4mths alr and he recently ended his major exams. either hit it and quit it or leave me alone. he’s been divorced for over 2 yrs, and claims i’ve met him at the best point he’s reached in his life. i assume he still has one or two on the side, which he doesn’t really tell me about, as he says its not important. a college guy friend whom i have known for 5 + years and i have been flirting our entire friendship.. conveniently receives a text message about an urgent situation at home and goes out the door before you knew it. guys always say they aren't looking for a relationship at that age, and it's hard to know what to think. if he wants to stay uncommitted, he owes it to you to tell you if he gets with some other woman. he could be perfectly happy with the way things are between us but i can’t help but want to know where this is gonna go. this was before i told him it was out of the country and not any guy around here) and even during the hook up he brought the guy up and he wanted to make sure that i didn’t have him in mind and that i didn’t think any guy was better for me than he was. i see six questions here that i have not yet answered. we often told eachother how much we really liked eachother throughout the whole hooking up, and it is safe to say the emotions were very overwhelming and surprised me. now we are done with college both hanging out, still flirting, and eventually lots of sexual tension lead to a really hot hookup (w/ sex). it was fine for me as i just came out of a long relationship and wanted something without complications. he always asks me question after question after question about me, almost like i don’t even get a chance to answer his questions because he keeps asking more!(there are always popping up and being waved … i just did not want to acknowledge them/ see them)i am learning to trust that the actions of people, especially men here it seems, will speak louder than any fluff-chats and fluff guys will reveal themselves without fail based on their actions. we texted back and forth almost every day for the whole break (2wk). we did not have sex but did a lot of snuggling. he needs to make you a priority, and if he can't do that, he is not ready for a new relationship. despite all these things, i feel he is a great guy if he really cares for someone and is in love…i just don’t understand what is wrong with me since he apparently loves so many things about me yet wants nothing apart from spending time and bed. we still hung out after that until we ended up having a friends w/ benefits thing. we have never talked about just being a hookup or never having a relationship. we both agree we’ve never felt anything quite like it; open, comfortable, and passionate. my facial expressions can be easily read and he could tell right away if i liked or didn’t like something and he right away changed it up and made it better., i like him very much; but i like me more. i blew it off and we ended up spending all day together. but i just want to know if he is seeing me as a rebound or maybe something more serious? there are so many things that point to us being nothing but fb’s but also there are so many things that make it seem like way more than that. when we stepped outside that night he kissed me for no reason, and when i asked he just said ” because i wanted to. he is a busy guy because beside working 40-50 hours a week, he is also doing athletic traning, and he just got out of a 4 years relationship for a few months. after he came back, i didn’t hear from him much because i had a feeling he was going to be leaving soon for his job out of the country and maybe that he didn’t want me to get attached/him to get my hopes up, but then all of a sudden i was hearing from him everyday. it was until recently when he had to study for his papers, we stopped meeting for a week. now he has not brought up anything about not gettin serious since that last text but i’m just assuming it’s because we have a mutual understanding and he doesnt feel the need to reiterate. so now he’s irritated because he wants me to tell him how much he means to me again like i did while we was in school. on friday and the time before that we also looked into each others eyes whilst having sex which didn’t happen before. in the course of our conversation, i let him know i am going out of town for the weekend.  but we do seem to be getting on quite well and he pops in to see me during the week and is lovely. we texted sporadically for a while and i invited him to a paintball session a bunch if friends were going to but he works all weekend (two fulltime jobs) so he couldn’t make it but offered to hang out after and we could “fool around.’s all in the early stages and i want to play my cards right… so i intend to not sleep with him until i know he’s not seeing anybody else or we have a dtr talk. really really like this guy and i’ve known him for years i’m just in desperate need for help! i know i should be more open with him, but i don’t want to scare him away. i really have no idea what this guy is on……we have all the hypothetical conversations and well what if this or that happened. all of my friends keep trying to get to be at the same place at the same time like at parties or on the vacation that we are all planning this summer and it makes me wonder if they know something i dont. i’d imagine that would be very awkward for people you date. we told no one of our one night stand and instead were just friends. would really appreciate some feedback as it appears i cant think rationally anymore even though rationality was once my strong side with men. you’re smart to go down about 5 years if you can – those women are so fed up with players and guys keeping their options open, they’ll jump at a chance to be with an older guy if they’re looking for a relationship. he said he hasnt fallen for anyone this fast and everything about me seems right. i give him advice and he listens and offers me with just that. it might be awhile before i have a chance to do it, so keep your fingers crossed, lol.@mon pawi’m sorry, that sounds like such a difficult situation. we have hung out several times since and he hasn’t made a move, drunk or sober and our friends have been teasing me about the fact that we hooked up and asking whats up (we used to hide it before). he right away says i like you alot lisa but i don’t think i’m ready for that. he expressed to my father that he had always had a thing for me and i just so happened to be interested in him as well. there was an instant attraction–i ended up going home w/ him that night but nothing happened we only kissed and he didnt push for anything else. i hope you like him too, or that poor boy is going to have some serious heartache. i try to just start out liking and then let feeling and time decide where it goes. went to see him with the strength to not hook up with him and i fell week and we did.. i’ve been in a fwb situation with my coworker off and on for over a year now and is been off an on b/c we’ve both ended it thinking feelings would get too strong and we’ll end up hurting in the end. we'd even gone on a few dates/hung out with friends on a few occasions during that time, and he would put his arm around me, kiss my head, and treat me like i was his. one day he went through my phone ( we were not even dating yet ) and he saw some texts from a guy that i was also interested in but i had stopped talking to. wouldn’t worry about this – the idea of “dating” as a long-term pattern of actually going on dates is almost unheard of in american colleges today. however: i had a guy friend visiting from australia, who he didn’t get along with. give him an indication that your feelings for him are strong. given that he’s a senior, it seems unlikely that anything will happen now.“so i guess my question really is, just because he’s not ready for any sort of commitment now does that mean he won’t be in time? for future reference, i think that if you have something casual with someone, stop and then pick up again at some future point, you should assume that it is still casual. those in a booty call scenario, however, typically reserve their hookup sessions for weekdays so they can save precious weekend nights for actual meaningful dates, or the potential for a new hookup. since then, he has been texting me consistently every day, showing a complete interest in my life, wanting to know everything thats going on, shows concern for my kids, sends me pictures of his kids and little projects they are working on around the house. here’s why: if he doesn’t want a relationship, he will say so and you will be free to end it and find someone more compatible. my friend encouraged me to email him just making simple conversation and he responded back pretty much telling me he noticed me and wanted to hang out. sometimes we stay in and watch movies, but other than that there has never been purposeless hanging out, but other than that for all intents and purposes he pretty much acts like my boyfriend. well i was out of town and traveling and when i got back saw him again and he wasn’t even working with me but came out to chat while i was passing through. i don’t know what the outcome will be, or exactly what i am doing writing about it on this post, but if there is a voice out there that can offer my heavy heart and soul some words of wisdom, i would certainly listen. kind of talked off and on since then because we were both busy with end of school/finals and such and somehow we got to talking and agreed we would take it a step further and hook up. he was always very sweet and very focused on me, telling me how beautiful i am and that he can’t believe i would be with him, etc. on the way there he tells me tonight is the night of his date we had fought over and that he tried to move it to the day time but the girl said it wouldn’t work for her. it’s none of their damn business and it bothers me they suggest i “owe” it to her or something. i became so confused but still didn’t do anything or talk to him about things (i am very passive when it comes to relationships)i don’t know. we go to dinner and movies and other special things that only we like to do. reserve your affection for someone who’s not keeping you hanging. he has been a serial monogamist in the past (as i used to be as well so i understand). it didn’t work out and as soon as he found out he asked if he could come see me…. advice is always to wait to have sex at least until you feel secure that you and he are on the same page in terms of what you’re looking for. he knows me very well now – what i find funny, the kind of food i like (and brings me things every so often – eg. i guess i didn't know what i was signing up for, because it became very obvious that he came over to have sex, which we did. we did, however, manage to establish that we are exclusive, but it is still a form of undefined relationship. you are comfortable how you are, if it ain’t broke don’t fix it, don’t let your friends talk you into ruining it by taking it somewhere you don’t want to go. then you can make an informed decision about what you want to do. i’ve been seeing this man several years older than i for 4 months now.. wanted to know how i felt about what was happening, to see if i wanted more or was cool with everything. so, that we should just stop hooking up and be friends.. you start off by telling me that you and this guy were very flirty when you were married and he was in a relationship with the mother of his child.) he said ” well we better do it before we start dating”. no i dont first time i cheated on bf or anyone had been having problems for like 5 years tried to talk about it went on same way can understand where you are coming from and i did feel so bad about the way it ended should not have did what i did but thanks for your reply. he contacted me everyday until we finally hung out and it was like we’ve known eachother for years. i went home and talked to my best friend who told me i was being pussie wipped and talked me into trying to hook up with someone else. you describe this man as an entrepreneur, workaholic and frustrated artist. it seems like the two of you have been dancing around the real question for ages. after bath-time we all pile up in bed, watch a movie, and fall asleep.:i want to hear your thoughts tho, its not just about meand no answer. if he is still involved there, it puts you in a position of having to compete with another woman for his attention, and that is unfair to you. i don’t think he was saying that just to get me away. man kissed me unexpectedly four months ago and since then we see each other regularly at least twice a month for 4-5 days every time. another such example was last night when i left my facebook on his computer and he took my account, and commented on some girl’s insomnia-related status that “thank god i had *** to help me sleep, he is such a nice guy – you need to text me about this :p” … i’m not even sure how to react to that, he said it was just a joke but honestly, it seems he wants everyone to know that we are “together”.” i said i guess i would and he said well, you never know you might find a man, fall in love, get married, and move to somewhere like ______”. they would only text or call you if they want to “hang out” with you. we work for the same government agency but in different areas. but it seems every time i think i have he sweet talks his way back into my life ans does the same tjing. said he wanted me to know that he didn’t just want sex. if you love him and he’s just in it for sex and friendship, then you are wasting your time and need to exit that immediately. he would sometimes talk about his frustration with his backa nd forth ex, which i really couldn’t care less about. we often flirted thru texts and had plans of meeting up just never did because of our schedules being so different. i explained to him that anthony had advised me that he wasn’t looking for a relationship at this time and he was shocked and also proud that he seems to be changing and he then said to me well my brother is a great catch don’t let him go.:” (he had said something about me trying smoking & him* trying drinking prior to this night)”. he’s 31 and has only been in one short relationship, that is a major red flag.

10 Guys Explain How To Tell If He Just Wants To Hook Up

Are we dating or just fwb

we live in different countries, so one of us or both fly. about a week ago he left my place in the morning (and at thus time we hadn’t slept together yet) he texted me asking how i feel about him and if i’m falling for him. i’m not even sure if i want it to happen again (i’m looking for something fun, not serious, after that 2 year relationship. a few days later my roommate and i went to his apartment and hung out, and he asked if i wanted to be “fuck buddies”. that make me doubt:-he still tells me he isn’t ready for commitment (i know you’re set on the idea that if they don’t want to commit, they never will… but i feel like he will get there when he’s had time to recover. one ammendment, i said the mutual friend said she wasnt looking for affection, that’s supposed to be “attachment”. apparently she didn’t take him back because of his upset facebook posts and the fact that we started hanging out again. some of his friends were casually talking and they included me in their conversation right away.– asked me to go out with him this weekend to go dancing  (where he normally picks up chicks) and to paint his apartment w/ him…though we are friends at work and occasionally after hours, we’ve been quite sporadic in hanging out. i’ve been having sex with a guy for 3 months now. i met someone else and was in a realtionship for a few months and he didnt talk to me much during that time. i broke up with him because we were spending too much time together, ignoring our friends, never leaving the house, etc. he toned himself down to make sure it wasn’t too much for me and didn’t put me last. i hooked up with him last week, and i’m trying to figure out what to make of it. but that you also need to make a choice about a job opportunity.  i am kinda just going with the flow – but i really don’t want to loose him. the thursday before that weekend he came to my job and i took my break and sat with him and we discussed what our situation was. if he met someone tomorrow he wanted to see or have sex with, he would end it with you in a heartbeat, no?.So we started dating a little after halloween, and i know he def likes me bc from the beginning, he made all the first moves, asking for my number, texting me, and asking me out. i felt closer to him while he was on the opposite side of the world than he is now. one time he said we shoule get married he said he was kind of serious. we cuddled and watched movies if i came over at night. think the best one is;“if you have to wonder whether or not he likes you, then you should assume that he doesn’t. we had been writing back and forth for about 7 months. just last night he introduced me to some of his friends from back home (i went to grade school and high school with some of them) and we all talked for awhile, him and i then danced and ended up making out. so my question is does he care about me or is it all just a game? the first night that we hung out, i implied that i wanted something with no strings attached. day i'm gushing to a coworker about boy a, this guy that i've been in love with since i was 13 and as i'm telling her about it he chats me on facebook. i wonder if i should let it go or tell him how i feel? i go over his house around once a week and we see each other throughout the week, but i just dont understand his intentions with me.  he said – next time we will have to have a nice chat. susan i’m not sure if you are still answering post or not. so, i usually take one step forward and two backwards. it’s been a few weeks, so this particular situation may have resolved itself one way or another, but i do have some general advice for you moving forward. i want is to keep it casual,that was the agreement from the start and we made it clear,over and over again.. how do i tell if he just wants to kiss or is genuinely interested? we showed affection in-front of each other’s friends too. in general, if he is asking to see you and wanting to spend time together, you can assume that he likes you, especially if he is not trying for sex. he’s fine with that and hopes what we have last forever. we did exchange some rather racey texts the day after we hooked up. must accept and agree to our terms of use before using our services. of course, i take medicine for depression and anxiety as well. i first began talking to him it started on a hookup level which i was okay since i was coming out of a bad 2 year relationship, but after seeing how nice this guy was to meexamples: always responds to my texts/calls immediately, brings me around his friends, still talks to me after i fell in a pile of snow out of drunken clumsiness, shares common interests, kisses my foreheadi couldnt help but start liking the guy, but being over protective of my feelings i told him my new years resolution was to not have a boyfriend and no love in 2011. we started getting closer in the physical level but when it comes to friends he is there for me. the first week, we just stayed up all night talking online, and when we finally hung out again, we had sex. the past two months i’ve been hooking up with an old friend from high school. you are not asking for a guarantee, but you really need to know what he is thinking and feeling. at first in a group but for over a month now it’s almost always just me and him. i asked him if its because he just wants to hook up with other girls he said no he just wants to mingle. if you don’t get clarification on this you are setting yourself up for a huge disappointment. anyways, we were making out for the 2nd time last night and the same thing happened. like me, i know, but should i mention any of this or wait for him to and play it by ear? anyways, before i left i asked him when he was going to move back here and he said he wasn’t sure, indefinitely. moved back home and we started to sleep together occasionally but he was still my best friend. we’ve hung out as often as our schedules allow. we are together, he's very attentive, kind and we have a lovely time … and then there is the gap-land of: anybody there? he hasn’t ever really declined unless he has other plans or something, but i am wondering if it could possibly be one-sided. so i told him if he ever needed to talk, to give me a call or text me and i’m an open ear. forgot to say, that conversation ended with him saying that if that was the case (me being flexible…) he wanted to continue seeing me and see how things would go. by the way, it’s just rude that she failed to respond to an invitation to a concert, and you should hold that against her. j/k, just send some xxx’s my way; those can stay up here a lot longer than your fingers, haha!“i’m not ready as i only broke up with my ex 4 months ago, i still need a little more time, but i’m glad you asked me and i do like spending time with you. he suggested we could go ‘somewhere more private’ but i declined; i said i really wanted to be with him but i implied that i wasn’t really used to doing these things on a regular basis and i needed just a little more time. irks me were instances of when we agreed on an outing, but he did not show nor canceled nor called. can’t tell from your description if he is a good guy who got very frustrated or a player who got impatient. as the years went on he had his gf who for some reason unknown to me hated me from the beginning. are both under 30, i’m dating other guys as well and i assume he sees other women. then a few weeks later, i saw him at a music event again, he was very interested, we talked just for a bit and i could feel that he was watching me whole night. at this point (about august that year) he still had not asked me out or anything. his friends call him a manwhore, he probably is one, b/c guys usually have each other’s backs on that in front of girls. he seems interested, so i guess i’ll find out one way or another about what he wants from me – other than the hu if anything. went decent but afterwards we went to sit by the waterfront and we talked about what was happening to him and the whole cheating thing. every time we go out in public he holds my hands, kisses my forehead or lips, displays affectionate gestures, and doesn’t have wondering eyes. after he came back, i didn’t hear from him much because i had a feeling he was going to be leaving soon for his job out of the country and maybe that he didn’t want me to get attached/him to get my hopes up, but then all of a sudden i was hearing from him everyday. just because you don’t see him with lots of other girls doesn’t mean he doesn’t have something else going on or wouldn’t jump at the chance if a hot new girl fell into his lap. and then we started staying with a girl we work with and her bf. months after that, i wanted to apologize to him, whether he would care or not, just wanted to get it out of my system to move on so first i wrote to him asking him how he was doing and he responded that he was doing well and all that, so i then sent an apology for what had happend before and he never responded back, so i figured either he didn’t care or i hurt him, not really sure. is it true that a guy will let go of a girl no matter how much they care/love/want in their lives if they aren’t ready financially or in general ready? when we had traditional dating, the steps were pretty clear and vocalized along the way.“despite all these things, i feel he is a great guy if he really cares for someone and is in love…”. i realized then that i don’t want to be that girl who gives years to a guy who decides late that she isn’t the right girl for him and leaves her and finds someone else. just put the whole thing out of your mind and do some other stuff this week you enjoy. the first night that we hung out, i implied that i wanted something with no strings attached. i took this that he was testing me to see if i’d respond or if i gave up on him. this is highly unprofessional, and you could be legally liable for sexual harrassment. we had fooled around randomly throughout college (no sex), nothing really came of it, it was always just drunken fun. we have been talking every day since (its been about a week) and i would normally be really excited, however he “kind of” has a girlfriend. i know sporadically through the years he has asked me things like “would i relocate/leave my area? if you’re wondering, either he’s not into it, or he’s playing mind games. he was introduced through friends as a nice guy not looking for anything too serious. he suggested going somewhere more private – was he hoping to have sex? sometimes he does or say things like that that makes me feel like im his gf then other times he doesn’t. thing that really scares me: as i said hes very close with my roomates, and so he knows their romantic situations and dispenses advice to them accordingly. i really don’t mean to, because i am dead-set on not pursuing him or accepting his advances- and he is, despite his circumstances, dead-set on continuing to pursue me! so i told the guy i was giving him up for lent, an excuse to stop making out with him and focus my attention on my other friend. am so proud of myself for fighting the urge to text him so far, because maybe these things just take patience. if she was looking for a hookup, and you acted like a potential bf, that would explain her diminished interest. but come the end of the night she said she just wanted to sleep in her own bed tonight. but ill just see what happens during and after break. or they lived in another city or weren’t really interested in commitment, etc. so i explained to him about my past relationship and that i didn’t think i was ready and he totally understood and we left it in the past. if he has feelings for you, that’s not the case, but you don’t know that. the next day he told me he didn’t want a relationship and wasn’t ready for one yet. anyway when he left all was fine etc……that was early hours sunday morning, i’ve not heard from him since execpt once, i text him and he replied saying he’d love to be with me (sexual conatation). over a year has gone by and he finally sends me an email, but he didn’t say anything, just sent me a link he wanted me to see about his experiences there. kind of talked off and on since then because we were both busy with end of school/finals and such and somehow we got to talking and agreed we would take it a step further and hook up. the next day was a weekend,i didnt have any plans so was he and he asked me to come over again but in the morning which it surprised me but hey………i said what the hell so i went for it and things were different. this guy is not looking out for anyone but himself! he didn’t want to see me or have nothing to do with me.)i guess it’s unfair to accuse you of this, but there’s a meme floating around young women who have seen too many rom-coms that the man’s attraction is static, and she can dither, flake, even date other guys, and expect that when she’s finally ready for him, he’ll still be there ready to pursue again until she feels like saying yes.-in front of my friends from work (one is a mutual friend), he hides his affection. get a text the next day asking how i am and then i hint at (did not offer/ask) a second visit, and he says he’ll call, which he did a few times to keep me up to date on where he was with his guy friends, all of whom were listening to him talk to me sweetly on the phone. he wasnt particulary nice to her and it was after theyd broken up we first slept together. i give you a lot of credit for asking him directly what was happening – i wish he had been more forthcoming with details. are easy together, have so much fun every time and we do the whole sit to watch movies, go out to eat, take walks and show pda…he’s never raised his voice at me or hurt me in any way. anyway during sex, it was amazing, if we had been any closer, bodies, eye contact, we could have been one person, personally from experience i’d say we made love. i let a couple days pass and i sent him a text just to say hey, hope his week is going well..he values his “guy time” and i think he doesnt want to be tied down but i wonder why this is still going on with us or what im supposed to think. we have begin to be intimate, for about a month now but only twice. it’s not possible you would not know what he is doing or he you. your words have helped me to reinforce within me this path of healthy ways of being in a relationship. he told me he had a crush from beginning he met me (7 years ago) and he was in touch with me but he never told me before. a few weekends later we ran into each other at the bar again and all we did was just talk about where we went to school back home and got to know each other a little more, no dancing or anything that night. i dont know if i should let my feelings come forward or if i should cut back on our communications so that my feelings do not get involved and i dont get hurt. he has clearly stated that he likes you and wants to keep dating. we got in a fight about how we weren’t close anymore in january, but things returned to civil by early february. for example, he said this winter he’d like to take me skiing. you are their first so they kind of gets awkward or unsure about what to do next. i have two classes with him next semester, so i’ll be seeing him whether i want to or not. he approached me, made small talk, asked for my number and proceeded to ask me out the same night. guys like to cuddle and be affectionate with girls, even when they have no desire for a girlfriend. for a month-plus of dating, that’s not a bad outcome (better to find out now than six months of hooking up later). the summer holidays has kicked in and we are no longer near his ex, he has been better with me and he barely has mentioned his ex and we go out each week and enjoy eachothers company.  we are exclusive, but both agreed at the very beginning that we did not want heavy relationship and that we both needed our own space as well and could not commit to a demanding relatiosnhip, but that we would not see/sleep with anyone else. after my friend left, he has gone back to how he was before the friend visit. i’m sure his feelings were hurt that you went up to his room and then wouldn’t so much as kiss him.  i saw him  manday day as we both had afternoon off work, it was lovely we chatted, laughed etc. this 2nd time he kissed me on the cheeks several times after making out and in the morning. about two weeks into everything since we started hanging out, i was an idiot and slept with him after a party. it isn’t uncommon for him to place phone calls or send emails late at night while we’re together. she was fine with it and we enjoyed each others company affectionately cuddling, kissing and talking for several hours. i just rescently went through a divorce and i told him that i didn’t want any kind of relationship yet cause i’m not emotionally ready. i get texts almost everyday (or every other) about how my day went, and other random stuff…. we were just finishing eachothers sentences and just talking in general. the other weekend i stayed fri and sat night there after we got food together, i was in florida last wknd and he called me while i was gone sat to tell me he had a bad night and we talked for a while, we made plans to hangout this past thursday to get ice cream and watch a movie and we met up last night and ended up going back to his house where i stayed the night and we hooked up…even when we hookup it feels like way more than that bc we cuddle before and after, etc. i have never had more than one sex partner at a time…and i find it weird i’m usually the one with the pants on in a relationship…go figure. guy who actually like you -- who wants to be present in your presence -- can ignore his phones when he's with you. so with all of this being said here’s my problem… i did not have any intention of getting into a serious relationship having just come out of one but the heart wants what it wants and unfortunately my heart is telling me it wants him! herecoachingebooksadvertisecontactcart10 signs that your hookup is falling for yoususan walsh •. wrote a few weeks ago about my confused feelings over the guy i was hooking up with on the regular who claimed to have feelings for me. anyways, so he started texting me a couple of weeks ago and we decided to get together since it had been so long. when we came back to school, we hung out on that monday night and everything went back to normal. he even said to me ”i like you quite alot” and he was worried that i only wanted him for sex.“these are just some of the things that confuse me since we are only fwb. although we didn’t have sex, i felt terrible for my actions and broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years saying i needed a “break”. am a freshman in college, and i met this girl who i am very attracted to about 3 weeks ago.” however, there’s a very wide berth between hooking up and getting married, so there’s nothing wrong with getting a little deeper into things if you are feeling more intensity.“i just don’t understand what is wrong with me since he apparently loves so many things about me yet wants nothing apart from spending time and bed. secondly, he expresses that he is willing to forego other women because it would make you unhappy. i really like him, i don’t to sound desperate or needy but i want to know. if you could call the shots, knowing he was willing, what would you ask for?  i do really like him and think we would be great in a relationship but we do need to make a little more time for each other and at least be able to go out occasionally.: haha i guess we are both not good at the texting thing but im glad we are both on the same page on the last bit 🙂. we have mutual friends so we hang out pretty often. if a reasonably attractive guy wants to be sexually stimulated, he’d be going beyond first base and he wouldn’t be using you for it, he’d find some floozy who’s begging to go further. if you want to do that for yourself, i think that’s great, but don’t do it because he tells you to. we go to the movies, dinner or the occasional movie night at his place.: idk i feel like you’re avoiding my question — if youre not just say so and ill drop it. wrote to you earlier, i have a question me and my hook up have been hooking up for a few years, roughly 3 years now. he was kissing my nose and forehead during the whole conversation and holding my hands. somehow the chemistry grew between us and we ended making out on my bday. but over time he became more and more attractive to me.: lol im sure youll work it off with your dates 😛again? he hides stuff on his social networking site because he’s afraid i’ll see something. it felt weird that we werent acting all couply– but that might have just been him reacting to the vibes i gave off. he started to kiss me a lot more, and caress me, and look into my eyes so strangely. we hung out after, again with one thing leading to another. i would decide first if you like him and want more with him. the routine usually went like this: come over for dinner, cook, watch a movie, go to “sleep”, cuddle a ton, actually sleep, wake up together, cook breakfast together (the whole time he would always touch me and be affectionate while we were cooking together and give me kisses etc). we went for lunch very casual, talk a little bit of everything, we laugh. like if you were traveling in india, i'd tell you to expect warmth and curry. a few days later we hung out again and he asked “so what are we? if you stop seeing this man, i would think very carefully before entering another arrangement like this one. that’s my fear because i don’t want to be the girl before the girl the guy marries..i forgot to mention that we waited a month or so into hanging out to have sex at all. i was scared that he would use me but already falling for him. i got to see him crying at work, it made me so sad. we spent the weekend together as planned and had an amazing time, great sex, great conversations, we laughed and just carried on. this has all happend in a matter of about three months between initial online contact to present. all, well i have story for anyone is interested and maybe help me out, i’ve never been in this situation before i’m 24 and the guy is 31, well we met 6 months ago, we get along great, good chemistry and we hook up here and there in the beginning we like each other. i just worry sometimes, but i know most of his friends’ aren’t the type of guys. however, the bottom line is that it doesn’t do you any good if he is determined to remain unattached. he finally brought up his family to me for the first time the last time i saw him, which he has never done that before (i loves his family dearly and are very close). he’ll kiss my forehead, carress my hair, hold my hand, kiss me, etc… and there’s the sexual parts too… but anyway, we’ve been real close since that very first day he called me. after that i will close comments and give instructions for contacting me. normally i would not have done that, but i just didn’t care, i wanted to show her who i was. second time we hooked up we woke up the next day at 7am and just cuddled and kissed in bed until 3pm, talking about everything. sort of evolved into an exclusive hook up before i knew it. for valentine’s day, he came over and cooked me dinner. he is constantly complimenting me and he swears he has never been a cheater and will never be with another girl as long as we are seeing each other. and the threesome is just waaayyyy out of bounds for a girl he cares about. he holds my hands during it, kisses me on the forehead, strokes me plays with my hair etc…. i wanted him to say explicitly that it wasn’t just sex for him, but i feel deep down that it isn’t. what he said and did was misleading, because later on when he said he didn’t want a relationship, in which i agreed, but i felt ambiguous and wanted to just see what happens without labels, so pressure was put on what we were doing. should i bring up the topic or just go with the flow and see what happens? if he found out that you have developed feelings for him, and he cut off the sex, that would be a blessing, because it would prevent further heartbreak for you. but isn’t it best to know sooner and not waste any more of your precious youth on false intimacy lovers. we started hanging out, then thats when he started making out with me. i just get somewhat offended when he does not answer, as it feels disrespecful, but i can clearly see he wants to rule the pace, perphaps to really get the idea whether this is worth or not rather than jumping into it.@badger,[thanks for reading that novel btw, i swear i’ve written shorter, less eloquently/passionately written papers]you’d think so right? since i was so sick the first 2 months of being pregnant and throwing up non stop and because we both knew we werent ready for a baby we made the decision to not keep it which was really tough. we had studied together, hung out in class together and hung out with others around the dorm after he came to my room to introduce himself. he asked lots of questions about me, my life, family and education, which he’s never done before. you affectionate names and referring to a future time when you might be dating is not a commitment. i’m my worry is i’ve been holding onto an unconventional relationship, while other attractive offers are coming around. when we finally got together things were awesome, but i got drunk and yelled at him and i dont remember what i said and he wont tell me what i said but he was freaked out and stopped calling me the usual nick names etc but we still had sex after that episode i guess i did in an attempt to get closer to him, but he never wanted to be with me in public after that, his excuse was every one thinks we are dating already and i dont want a commitment (he had a bad break up). that, i suppose, everyone has to gauge or find themselves what that means to them. he finally brought up his family to me for the first time the last time i saw him, which he has never done that before (i loves his family dearly and are very close). we talked before, even had a normal conversation during the intimacy! fwb has also asked me to bring my dog over, since we’re both dog lovers. sure enough i got sent a letter from him a month later explaining that this is just a break like in rom-coms where he will have his fun and realise in 5 years time that i really am the one. my facial expressions can be easily read and he could tell right away if i liked or didn’t like something and he right away changed it up and made it better. i’m kind of worried now because at first i was only interested in a casual hookup but he is such a nice guy, and we have spent the last couple of nights just getting to know each other and just laying in each other’s arms talking all night. i’ve been seeing a guy for almost 5 months now. and we didn’t have sex, but while we were hooking up he was clearly focused on me.

Who is park shin hye dating in real life

Are we dating or not quiz

if he says “no relationship” i advise you to end it immediately, before you get even more hurt.• tags: awkward, casual sex, date, dating, emotional intimacy, emotions, eye contact, fall, favorite things, friend, friendship, guys, hook up, hooking up, hookup, humor, hurdles, intimacy, open, perils, reassurance, relationship, relationships, romantic relationship, sex, sexual intimacy, signals, signs, talk, together. now, many month later, we have been hanging out regularly as friends. he has literally had trouble fitting you into his schedule and has admitted that even close family members feel that he doesn’t make time for them. susan:) i am positive he’s not, but just out of curiosity– tsk, tsk, lol– why do you ask? i said i was cool with it but that i did really like him and think that it would be nice if we spent time together getting to know each other but that would happen the longer what we are doing continues as its inevitable, he said he felt bad about what was happening and just wanted to make sure i was ok about it. we write to each other almost everyday in between and he calls me for some lengthy talks. i am a manager and just before the break-up my ex convinced me to hire his friend. susan,here is my situation…………i`ve met a guy on a dating website,he lives in another country but that its not a problem for our casual relationship because he always comes to where i am for business,twice a month. i held it steady, i put up with the pain and emptiness, and then a came along, and now i really get to feel the pain of being on the hook of someone you so thoroughly adore. i was all for it because i didn’t think i would ever like this guy, because he is not the best looking guy in the world but he is cute and he is a little chubby. he was sweet and affectionate, which i totally ate up. serious relationships can and do start with hooking up, if both parties were open to a relationship from the start. would he not want to define the relationship if i meant something more to him than just a companion and someone to kill time with? he says he has trust issues due to being “screwed over” so many times. i asked why and he said because i was really cute and weird and stuff. and when he first saw me since my day of hire he gave me a really weird look. that’s normal and you shouldn’t try to rationalize it away with “well i’m not really in love with him so i’m not going to admit i’m hurting.“how do i tell him i want to go on dates and not just hang out in his room. i guess i just wanted to know but i should have waited., had a girlfriend at the time, but he and i spent many nights together, went out on dates in open public, and i moved out of my home, as my marriage began desolving at the seams prior to a. i don’t know if i shld feel upset or not 🙁. i told him to tell me the truth, even if it hurts, and it took him awhile to respond back, i’m guessing either he put it to the side because i blew it and he didn’t care or because he was trying to figure out what to say. i am currently planning on waiting for her to text me to initiate. my life has been a train wreck for the past 3 years now, but i love a. he apologized for the late response and hopes everything is well with me. i have also learned not needing to slam or berate the 'other' when things are not working out the way it feels right or healthy. it makes zero sense to even consider a move like that unless the two of you are in love and want to make your relationship a top priority. i told him i had feelings for him and might not be able to do this much longer or they’ll turn for the worst. guess is that he is enjoying your company and wanting to spend time with you but might balk if pressed for a commitment. he visited that night and we kissed and i’ve been head over heels every since. he may be shy, he may be wary because he was hurt once, or he may not want to get involved with someone when he knows he is leaving.. if you vocalize “i don’t want a relationship” you think you won’t fall for him. but we continued to sleep together, and i guess i can't blame him because i okayed it. he is consciously or subconsciously trying to draw out your emotional intimacy, or possibly trying to bargain for your intimacy by giving you his first. while this girl and my self went to college together, i do not consider her a friend. since your feelings are changing, it’s a good idea for him to know that too. when we’re alone (and only alone, not in public) he is so affectionate. i’ve known this guy for years through a band that i am friends with that he joined. i should apologise in advance for my english; it’s not my native tongue. that is not (as this rxxxx poster on some other tread on this site) me refusing or denying something against a man, but it is for me…. has just come out of a year and half relationship as well that was heading towards marriage but he cheated on her (not with me) by accident and she broke it off and it left him incredibly wounded. admire your strength – you know this is not a good situation for you. he will again state that he is not ready for commitment. he’s gone out of his way to make clear that he doesn’t want anything more. not only that he said he’s done with the other girl but i don’t know i guess i’m confused there is a lot i really can’t put on here too long of a story but any help would be great or advice. hung out a couple more times and then, about two weeks ago he came into a room i was in with his friends studying. i met this guy over a year ago through another guy i was dating at the time. however, if you see the signs that it has nowhere else to go, it is high time you decide whether or not to push through with it or not. you kindly for taking the time to reply – and spot on! he has told me of that’s all he wanted he wouldn’t have stuck around for awhole year. i asked him what he was crying for and he said it was just really good to see me. he makes allusions to us being together (well, hanging out) in the future, but still it’s unclear. he took me out to dinner for the first time. apologies, i just found your comment here – sometimes they slip through the cracks. giving him an opportunity to feel comfortable and ready for another relationship. he introduced me to his best friend and the three of us hungout for a bit. i'm not saying it doesn't exist, just that it might be a little harder to find. we ended up hooking up the night before i left for europe (july 2011). however, our relationship now seems to be more centered around being ‘friends’ as opposed to simply the benefits (in contrast to most fwb’s where ‘friends’ is more of an obligation). we are both in grad school and life is very hectic)and you’re right. he is just playing you to get sex, and probably doing the same, or trying to, with other girls. things have not been going too well, but i’ll not give up. after he left he limited conversation and to 2 times a week and he never start texting me and if i do he will answer with long delay or call me the day after that. you've never not had sex with said guy and you've hung out together more than a dozen times, either you are a sexually electric couple, or the foundation of this relationship is sex -- which is code for a hookup relationship, not a boyfriend/girlfriend one. i feel ashamed because on the second day we wnt to his house and things got a little heated up and i don’t normally do things like these, i don’t know what is happening to me. his behavior has been unpredictable – and maybe he feels that you are hard to read too.. there is a bit of flirting, as if they want to do more, but it feels a little awkward in public. i was wondering if there’s anything i need to be concerned about in my current situation or just enjoy things as they are. later that i asked my friend what was said and he told me that he changed the subject just the way he did when he talked about me before. i don’t know how much hurt i can keep taking from him in hopes that we’ll be something more in the future. he admitted he was a little tipsy, but not much and said that he liked that i was sober (we used to hook up sober and drunk). susani was in an relationship which was not working i meet another guy online talked for about a week or two before meet seem to get along ok was alot of physical chemistry between us and could make me lauth seemed nice meet a few times ended up having sex with him he know i had boyfriend explained situation to him that we was pretty much over for years and that we was like friends and that i was going to end it though meet up about 5 times before i managed to end with bf seemed still to get along ok but most times we meet up ended up having sex would go for odd walks,watch tv, kiss after sex etc talk abit seemed to be going ok still was asking if i dumped my bf yet and when said no i want to but it very hard to said i was a big chickens though i had ask him to meet up most of times and only talked to him on msn and if i would txt him he mostly txted me back.” i tried yo get a sense of what he meant, hoping he wasn’t he wasn’t just bring really forward. does he invite you to things, or does he schedule activities mostly around just the two of you doing something and then hooking up (like dinner and a sleepover)? but after that night i told him, he seemed even more into me. and apparently he 'endured' lots of friendly male banter once the others realized he had a fancy for me…. i’ve been being chased by this guy i know, for a couple years now, and although, at first, i liked him, after a few months, decided that he was not for me, and short of telling him bluntly, “give it up, i’m not interested”, i’ve dropped every subtle– and obvious– hint that i can think of. i would put it on hold and risk this opportunity if it was more clear this is heading towards something more. although i was very confused, i was waiting so long for him to ask me that. and he asked to keep it low key because publicity always brings more problems. i really like him a lot, just he seems close to perfect in my opinion. have been emotional in the past and he has given me nothing , and it feels like the tables have turned, i ignore him when he gets emotional it ends up being that awkward silence till his forced to change the subject, i know it’s immature and mean but i feel like if i ignore it it’s not there. however everyone close to them claims they are just friends. and when we got back to my place he continued telling me how much he likes me nd how happy i make him and that he was going to invite me to his house upstate for the weekend if i didn’t already go out with my girlfriends.  i’m still a little confused by it all and unsure about it but we’ll see what the future holds.. regularly text or call the other to get updates on what you two are doing and the likes. i really don’t know if he feels anything for me. this one night we hooked up, then we went out the next day, and the day after that but it’s not like he asks me out. if you want to be dating “out in the world” and not in his room, what you can do is lead that kind of life regardless of whether he comes along – plays, music events, art shows, pep rallies, sports, mixers, you get the idea. sense his return (almost 3 weeks now) we have only seen eachother once.  we both have very busy work schedules and kids etc so find it hard to make time to meet up so when we do we just want to rip each others clothes off. we then hung out the next day, but i ended up going to his place and meeting his roomates and we stayed up all night talking. and i’ve even have a very close, well-trusted and well-seasoned guy friend tell me that a man will not pursue a woman for more than a few short months if he is not genuinely interested. i am not used to a fwb where there is equal emphasis on the ‘friends’ component as well as the ‘benefits’ component. we meet on colleagues’ birthdays and similar occassions and sometimes we go for drinks after work with some friends. i was and still am ok with that for now, but he acts like he is falling for me. we emailed back and forth just once every while, while he was traveling just to see how he was doing and then all of a sudden i didn’t hear from him anymore. i would say that if you can hang in there for a while and see where this goes it might be worth a shot. i could go on and on with a list of caring, thoughtful things he does but these are just a couple examples that to me show that he cares for me very much. i wouldn’t be surprised if he checked in on thursday or friday. we had been writing back and forth for about 7 months. we ended up having sex in front of the fire.( we are neighbors btw) so i normally see this guy almost every other day and not on the weekends. before we hooked up, i asked him what his plans were then because he graduated that semester and he told me he was going to leave the country to teach english. i moved back having left my husband and he was there for me as a friend. i think you can simply say that you are feeling very confused about the events of the last two weeks. and he hides his feelings well, so instead of just waiting to talk to him in person i spoke before i thought and sent him an email telling him that i just didn’t want to just hook up everytime i saw him, i wanted to know what was on his mind. answer this love quiz to know where you stand in his life, how to act towards the relationship or if there is any relationship at all. as soon as i avoided him for a while he came running back in my face. he’s also invited me to places and offer to pay for me. one of the guys in particular kept looking at me and smiling and when i went to the bathroom he said something to me but i didn’t hear him or respond due to the fact that there was a female with them. is he feeling guilty or am i stupid to think that he still has any feelings for me? i messaged him and called him once and he didn’t answer, so i just went out without him. i don't know if i should feel like shit because he turned to me as soon as he started having sex again, or do i tell if he wants to stop dating me? something happens where we didn’t hook up as much hug each other and all that.  i called him when i got to the location, but he said he was really sorry and completely forgot about our date because he was busy with projects for classes. you could actually do that now, or at any time, but i can understand why you might want to give him some time without pressuring him. hard to say whether it’s too late with this girl or not. i don’t want to just hook up with him and repeat the past, with me feeling broken hearted, confused, and our friendship becoming awkward? i’ve been told that he does but he is ‘afraid of commitment’ or something, i understand he was traveling before and have always been understanding of that and that could be a reason why he was the way he was, and i’ve heard that if a guy isn’t financially/emotionally ready, he’ll push any girl away, even if he really cares, and who knows maybe he’ll come back when he’s ready. day of the date came and he canceled on me 🙁 he said his coach said they had to do something as a team that night, but said that “we should do it in the week sometime next week”so that would be this week,,, and he has yet to mention it again. he will treat you as well as you demand that he treats you..Do you think i should ask him why he is not making move or if he just sees me as a friend?, keeps rushing into my life as soon as he feels that i am settling back into my world with my husband. used to text me maybe once a day… we wouldn’t text all day either it was just about classes or about something relevant at the moment (no “hey”. maybe it was his charger left home… a crazy week, i don’t know, but even the tone of his texts is more formal, yet interested. the upside: you don't have to reciprocate, which means more cash in your shoe budget. the problem is that i have fallen for him badly and i really dont know what to do or where i stand. just text me “i can’t wait to hold you”……. things moved too quickly and even though we both enjoyed eachother, it burned out just as fast as it started.. but that didnt last long before me and guy a was back together again. you’re already in deep, so you owe it to yourself to clarify this asap. as cliche as it sounds im scared shitless to be hurt again, and to seriously fall for someone. and it looks like he isn’t keeping up anymore with his online journal and almost like he’s disappeared. you'll see personalized content just for you whenever you click the my feed . and again, it was very good sex for us both. if you are ok with just being friends, and you don’t want to risk that, you can continue to wait or just figure he’s never going to make a move.. he told me that he’s not ready for a r/s and he doesn’t want to meet me up to talk about it because he claimed there is nothing to talk about. now, to be fair, over time, i have realized that i have sent him some unconscious signals that have apparently led him to believe that i am interested– that’s my fault, because even though i know he’s not right for me, i am still physically attracted to him; but like i said, i have been ignoring him for quite some time now, and he will not give up. well it turns out that the guy is good friends with a member of my family and they were talking about me one day. “well i’d say that went pretty good haha” is what he said. those are the signals that point me in the “more-than-friends thinking” direction. we even slept in the same bed and his mom asked if he wanted the couch, he told her no he wanted to sleep in the bed with me. it was hurtful they way he did that because by then i already had these feelings for him. one day out of the blue he just literally stopped talking to me! i went over there the next week, and we ended up sleeping together., the fact that his profile is off the dating site bodes well for me. months ago i was told by a man who also works there and who has been friendly, kind and very helpful to me whenever i had asked for help, that he actually has been very attracted to me ever since he met me. don’t expect contact until two days before you’re supposed to go on the date (that would be friday obviously). i don’t want to be another one of his girls that he can just add on to the list. at times he is so sweet to me,holding my hand,kissing me,holding me,making me laugh! i’m looking for something fun and light which could potentially turn into an ltr and eventually marriage. i told him and he told me to move on without him being more than just a friend. he said that when he finds out if a sex buddy is falling for him that he cuts the sex off and concentrates on being friends. but the big problem and why i am now more confused is because he said he does not have time for a proper relationship (neither do i thats fine) that it would not be fair as he cannot commit the time to me or anyone else at the moment. am a 28 year old singlr mom of 3 and for the past month and a half i have been hooking up with a 22 year old man. we were pretty intimate after a few dates (holding hands, spooning while watching movies, pecking). surely making life plans around one another would signify an intent to marry – that you are “the one” and it sounds like after such a short time, he is in no way ready to say that.(not problems related to him) he jokes that i am just using him for sex. he got very upset bc he found out i had slept with this guy while talking to him, before i ended it. about a month later (april 2011) he told me we should stop hooking up because he was talking to a girl, mary, that he had stopped talking to in the fall for me and didn’t think it was fair..go to dinners (he always paid for me) going out for ice cream renting movies going to see movies going out together on the weekends whether it was w/ my friends or his…things were perfect with us. just a couple days ago our “relationship” became more sexual … i am wondering if this is a sign that i could mean more to him, since i said before i didn’t want a sexual relationship unless it meant more to him.. go out with friends and enjoy stuffs you do like catching a movie or having bowling night. he holds me and sleeps next to me when we have sex he wants me to get off at least 2-3 times before he even wants to have sex as in oral sex and then spends more time focused on me again not complaining just curious as to what it could mean. we’re hanging out, i’m “bonding” with your kid.. i mean i like him, but sometimes i feel like he sends such mixed signals and i feel strung along, waiting for him to do something. its just such a scary thought but i know i deserve an answer. i didnt ask for his number b/c i was nervous the next day when i left but i stayed over there until late the next afternoon and he drove me 30 minutes home to my house made comments the whole way that he hopes there was traffic so he could spent more time w/ me ect. clinginess is never appealing to guys, so learning to be more independent will serve you well in the future. these are just some of the things that confuse me since we are only fwb. i went out of town on sunday, otherwise i think he probably would have tried to see me again. when he’s being super intimate, comment that he’s acting like a lot more than a fuckbuddy and see what he says.  we both put our kids first, i’ve blown him out on a few nights cos of kids, other plans etc and we have just worked round it so what now. one night we just cuddled and i thought maybe this is going somewhere. so i say i’m housesitting and could use some company, and he says he’d love to and maybe keep me company all weekend. men and women both hope for it and are both wrong. this guy doesn’t talk to me all day long like we used to and i just feel like he doesn’t go out of his way for me ever. in other words i haven’t met a guy that really piqued my interest until……before new year of 2012 where i was introduced by my close friends to this amazing (and hot) guy (he’s 34, a bit of an alpha i think but has been known to be in ltrs) during a party in a bar.” we tried out for a short while but i was still not very convinced. he would take me to movie, go out to play pool with me, introduce me to his dad when i came over, be willing to cook for me (because i cooked for him and i guess he wanted to return the favor), and ask me to stay the night with him. you give hints that say no, but something about your manner or body language says yes! language, and many so called 'dating rituals' here are to me most peculiar, to say it kindly. i don’t see the point of him bringing all this up, we will never work so i’d rather not know. to connect with your teen, whether you want to or not. i have learned to sometimes just let things sort themselves out: i. i just let it go and finally he emailed me to see how i was doing and noticed some changes i’ve made (just school direction and such) and was writing to me like nothing bad happened in the past. he’ll always text me and see what i’m doing and seems interested in my life stories. he was always concerned about my feelings- even more than i was, so he was very aplogetic and seemed to want to be honest because guilt ruined him. my previous relationships have been heavy cohabitating type situations or long distance; i’ve never really “dated” anyone so i have no idea what is normal, or expected, or what to do. if you add sex to your strong feelings, it will be much, much harder if things don’t work out. he was a complete sweetheart and as he was going he talked about some stuff we could do together and i asked if that lune always worked for him, and he laughed, said he was serious but wasn’t looking fir “a girlfriend or wife or anything). even though he was willing to go places with me and said that he would always keep his promises, i felt that all the things he said were to get into my pants. isn’t it supposed to be a process or am i just fooling myself into believing something might still happen with this guy? we haven’t talked about “us” since last year but things seem to have changed…and yet they’re the same. met this guy 6 months ago, he and i constantly kept in touch every single day when i left the country and he told me towards the end how much he liked me, and ultimately one night texted me while drunk saying he was in love with me (we used to talk for hours every single day). from what i learned recently, hes 31 and has only been in one 5 month relationship, the rest were all flings and “friends with benefits.’ve been hanging out with this guy for about a month now. we were laying cuddling and guess what he started the talk……. not seeing him for a half a year, we coincidently ran into eachother. susan,its me again…so i wasn’t able to hold out long and i confronted the man and we had a small talk about “us. friday again he came back to my friends place with me and once again we were all cuddly and holding hands, kissed me on my forehead. i know you’re probably going to tell me to just talk to him about it or ask him what the deal is but i don’t want him to think “oh god… look what i got myself into. if he isn’t suffering the same way, he’s likely to just maintain the status quo. he has had two sincerely horrible relationships, and although the last one ended a year before, he kept having a really toxic friends/friends with benefits with his last girl until he left just a couple months ago. we both have similar heart breaks and still fall for the ones we loved. i do get to every question from readers, but i receive many emails and requests for advice – it can take me a while to dig out. of my friends suggested to just ask him to kiss me! you can go with platonic friendship for now, stop kissing and encouraging him in any way. spend every weekend together (either he stays over or i do) and we say that we like the other person a lot, have mutually good sex (we’re both very physical), have met each other’s family, and he’s met my friends and made an effort to impress them.!i just wondered if maybe i could get a little insight on my current situation. true couples, however, enjoy making plans; they buy tickets for a concert a month out and make reservations for a restaurant days before the date. then for the rest of the week he acted distant, not answering calls or texts, not wanting me to come over. i know mean, but he wouldn’t stop and i was tired and had an appointment int he morning. just feel as if things changed since we had sex. on some of these occassions, after having drinks, we’ve gone just the 2 of us to a different place (a coffee store, a restaurant, a bar, etc. i responded just saying that i saw it and i enjoyed reading it and glad he was doing well. im really sorry for the mixed messages, and i dont want to hurt you. why not just mention that things have felt really different recently and you wonder what it means? real problem with fwb is that no matter what rational boundaries are set, the hindbrain does what it wants, and odds are somebody’s going to want more. do like him, but if there are not some other flavours coming through from him whenever he gets back to town, i will just keep liking him from a distance, and keeping it friendly, as you said! now with all of that being said we have seen eachother almost every day since thenand every time were together he is constantly telling me how much he likes me and how good i make him feel and how great i treat him and that he’s not used to it etc… he’s more than affectionate with me and when he looks into my eyes i would swear that he is falling very hard for me. why should she bond with you when you are a booty call and he is dating other women?

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Are we a couple or just dating

he seemed then, and every other time we hung out, was that he truly wanted to get to know me. we both were involved in some traveling afterward, and spent a month apart while continuing close contact through ld calls, emails, skype, you name it.: can you not lol i dont feel comfortable discussing this with my fwb.: are you in love, or is it just a crush? but he stayed with me every night for a week and we hooked up a couple times but not every night. the next day he went back home and now things have gone completely way out of hand,he is sending me videos,romantic love songs,calling me 3 times in a day,even more wanting to know where i am or my plans for a day and he is trying so bad to know more about my family but in a cleaver way and everytime i changed the subject he finds a way to sink me in into it again. if you like him, though, and you want more than friendship, i think you are going to need to give him a nudge. have come out of a very serious relationship 6 months ago, i was engaged at age 18 and he broke my heart when he went to university and told me that he wanted to do the “uni thing” and sleep with other girls and he could not be committed to me for the next 60 years of our lives. comments really put me at ease and i feel more confident on what i need to do. assuming you’re young, say between 18 and 22, i would say it’s highly unlikely you’re going to flip a player for any period of time.@swindled,if you mind me saying something – you know, technically he didn’t “stick around for a year” bc you guys technically didnt meet up or do anything solid, it was just back and forth texting — however the fact that youve hung out all summer and the fall before hooking up in november(was it? and for a few weeks we avoided eye contact when it unspokenly stopped.. we are now a part once again in different countries but he still texts me every day and calls me at least twice or thrice a week and we have phone sex, and once when he called me drunk he told me he doesnt want to have sex with any one but me and how much he misses me… but after that he kinda backed off and the past couple of days after he said that while drunk i think he got embarrassed bcos he’s just been texting me with no intimate talk like before. we had a few talks, always initiated by me, regarding “us. however, if you are really starting to fall for him, get out now. (of course he asked for my number so we could keep in contact about classes and such)i went to a party he was at and we danced together and he surprised me by telling me he wanted to kiss me ( we did ), then we all went back to the dorm together and hung out, just talking for hours. however this exchange program will end in an year and he and i will go our separate ways to half way across the world. wonder if you ever wanted no strings attached, that saying that was just a negotiating technique or a defense mechanism to keep yourself for getting too attached too early. nope, he’s just enjoying your company without getting emotionally involved. but we spent almost everyday in the 4mths tgt under my hse void deck. i moved away again and we kept in touch and hed ask me advice on a girl he liked and they eventually got together. however i don’t want him to think i’m dating either. since then, we have hung out a couple times (during the weekends because we both have careers) and i can’t figure out his motives.  he said he thinks about me all the time, rest of the week he has texted, called etc and hopefully we will meet up again friday night. found out about his activity on match not through snooping or invading his privacy, but because you received an email that took you by surprise. im pretty shy (and have also not dated much or had a bf before, but am a sophomore in college) so i found this to be a relief. hang out and watch movies together, as well he cuddles with me and holds my hand, i do not want to read too much into it, so could you shed some light on this? and if you do hear the worst, then cut him off 100%. but there is a huge kicker—both of us play way too many games with each other…we both continuously say to each other we are just friends just friends just friends. i dont know what to do… should i just be patient and wait for him to contact me? here is the kicker…he made it clear he is emotionally unavailable for a relationship right now. however, the bottom line was ” i don’t have time for a relationship. he’s even looking for some extra jobs now (i hope i didn’t get him all bankrupt) and wants to take me to a place i promised my granddad i’ll visit (far far, expensive expensive)… he wants to get a bigger flat as well for some reason. also, he has cooked for me several times whenever i come over. after three months, he is not ready for a relationship, i would end it. well, every time i would tell him i’m talking to a guy he would say ” don’t date him” or always say something like oh he’s too old. instead of praying my tomato plants to grow, i go to the store and buy some tomatoes. i don’t know what to think, or how to act., well i have been talking to this guy for over a month, and we have hooked up twice. he does say that this is just for now, that in the future, maybe even a week or in a month, he may change his mind. we had unexpected chemistry and i felt really into him.  a part of me feels like he genuinely wants this to work, but something else makes me feel like he might not be as interested as i am. we share the same political and (non-)religious beliefs and we both love movies and books and have similar backgrounds, etc.,he told me that he cant seeing anyone else so i shouldnt either because he doesnt want to have std`s which was a lame excuse,i mean come on,there are condoms,so its obviously am seeing this like a relationship or am being paranoid with everything? i was going to the gay club with my friend and i asked him to come hang out with me; he did although he was very afraid at first so i gave him some credits for that. she is also the author of menu dating: taste your way to the mai. from the next day onwards we both had an unspoken agreement to forget that discussion and we have continued to this day (two months later) being friends-with-benefits. he saw me from a ways away, got off his bike and came up to me and hugged me, sweetly talking to me, we talked for a while, and before we parted ways he gave me a really good hug and a kiss on the forehead. after that, we still texted often; maybe i was paranoid but i got mad if he didn’t not text me everyday. i assured him he had done nothing wrong and that i liked him and he said he knew and he was sorry (! however, if we were at the same place, there is a chance of “something more developing” (whatever that might be). i don’t want him to one day just move on to someone else.  since my first relationship went horribly wrong due to rushing, i am more than okay with taking my time. i’ve been at my job for about a year and a half now… when i first started housekeeping at a hotel (which was march of 2009) there was a front desk gentleman who i found very, very attractive. relationships that start out with a cheating incident often don’t last, for obvious reasons. a guy who is reluctant to be someone’s boyfriend is not right for you. when he woke up the next morning we lay cuddling for hours just talking about random stuff- music, family etc. he’s handsome and sweet and kind and respectful of me. nothing in your story indicates he is interested in a love relationship, nor is he willing to make a relationship with a woman a priority in his life right now. we women tend to attach great importance to affectionate gestures and spending time together as indicative of emotional investment because that’s the way we operate. we are both in our 30s, and i am falling for him more and more and i believe he is the one for me but i dont see any move from his side.”it’s so hard for young people today to ask these questions. when we are together he tells me that he is going to take me on trips away and says he likes me, and talks all about his family and gets excited about me meeting them etc.” waiting for him to come to you is not a good strategy, because you are already feeling confused and conflicted. he took me to a movie, and ever since march we’ve been talking nearly every single day. it’s only been 2 weeks of texting and talking on the phone and 2 hook ups, then yesterday he called asking if it was okay that we put off the sex for now, so we wouldn’t get sick of it and so that he could put more respect into it and just hang out. his not being able to enter you, it can take a while for a woman to become aroused enough to make penetration easy.. and then we hung out for a the rest of the night and i slept over with him (no sex, but we hooked up) (i had gotten locked out of my dorm and he said i could sleep with him). more has happened and guess what i am still confused. if he does, then you can move forward and stop worrying. he texts me and we talk for hours about his job and his life we talk about my figure skating ( i figure skate) and all kinds of things it will get sexual for a few texts then we are back to talking about each others lives. he wanted to sleep with me, but it was the wrong time of the month, but he said he was okay with just kissing and cuddling.  maybe he feels some affection, but i doubt anything more–at least i doubt it based on anything you’ve said. i was straight forward with on letting him know my feelings. really liked him but i heard all this rules about waiting 3 days for him to call. even in front of his friends hell show affection by holding me or even kissing me and then other days he won’t do anything. otherwise you’re just stumbling around in the dark, and that almost never ends well. i don’t know if he ejaculated or if he just wants to take things slow. susan and everyone,i have been reading this page for a while to help myself and finally decided to write. the fact you’re turned upside about this tells me you very much do want a romance with this guy, you can call that “rushing into something” or whatever but you don’t have to rationalize that you don’t want to “rush.“is it worth sticking around and seeing where things go or are they not ever going to go anywhere? so i told him to call me or text me anything he wanted if he needed someone to talk to. recently he has been using the word “love” very often, ie. then a few nights later we were all supposed to go out.,maybe if you hook up with him for another ten years he’ll think about making you his girlfriend. if he has feelings for you and fights them, he’s not emotionally available. really odd cos as i am typing this i am starting to think how weird it all is and that maybe i should just run a mile…………. is going to school to become a doctor and is very driven. you might have guessed, i am beyond early college years, (we both are in our mid-40's) – but as far as catching onto to american mannerism between men/women, i am a bloody virgin..How do i tell him i want to go on dates and not just hang out in his room. this was before i told him it was out of the country and not any guy around here) and even during the hook up he brought the guy up and he wanted to make sure that i didn’t have him in mind and that i didn’t think any guy was better for me than he was. i’m just sick of him going from fwb to friend to confusing.@badgerin this case i have to follow my head and not my heart, i don’t speak to him or see him as much as i used, probably once every 2-4 weeks there has been times where i haven’t spoken to him for months and ever since i’ve distanced myself he has started to open up, when i do see him he keeps me there won’t let me leave sometimes i’m there for a couple of days.  we flirted over the span of the next few minutes, during which i managed to snag his number and plan a date with him (for next wednesday, november 16). i had asked him why doesn’t he put a dating ad on for the cities he travels in, and he says he doesn’t go to them often enough to want to have a gf there…. however here is the problem we hookup 3-4 times a week and each time it is hours on end like 12 bc thats when he gets off work until like 4 p. after not talking for a while, he randomly contacted me and said he was getting back with his ex and he wanted to be friends. basically me and my fab met in grad school when he sent me his number via facebook after we grabbed drinks as a group after orientation. we emailed back and forth just once every while, while he was traveling just to see how he was doing and then all of a sudden i didn’t hear from him anymore. and he started calling me baby and sweetie again in the past few days some thing which he stopped before until i tried to end it. i’m just not sure if i’m supposed to play it cool, or let him know i’m interested in getting to know him – more than the hu. so either he feels that way, which would be okay i’d guess cuz it sounds like you feel the same, or else he’s trying to tell you he loves you but is using the word heaps to protect himself. i don’t consider myself the normal everyday kind of girl and i have always found it hard to find someone who really understands me. enjoying your comments/articles susana – thank you for sharing them! if he is looking to date casually and not let it get any more serious, then he’s happy as can be with the status quo. i thought he just wanted to have sex but he didn’t even try, he really just wanted to cuddle..Lisa, i can only go on the information you’re giving me, but it sounds like his changing his mind about commitment is unlikely. i’ve been told that he does but he is ‘afraid of commitment’ or something, i understand he was traveling before and have always been understanding of that and that could be a reason why he was the way he was, and i’ve heard that if a guy isn’t financially/emotionally ready, he’ll push any girl away, even if he really cares, and who knows maybe he’ll come back when he’s ready. why would he ask you to move after hanging out and hooking up for a week? our second date was almost canceled due to him not feeling well. (we did not do anything sexual until 3 weeks into dating and it was like the 7th date. because i want to be his girlfriend, but he said he needed time to make the decision himself without me forcing him into it. and the other day he made a comment about his friends and refer to me as his girlfriend (this was the first time he use the word “girlfriend”)so what do you think?, there are a couple of things here that worry me. i know he has dated girls but from what i understand, they were all long distance relationships. what other women are willing to do, to condone or participate in can not be my guiding line in such a deeply personal and private matter. think an important point to make is that when it comes to the sex it’s all down to me. your doing things you’ve never done for other people. from the night before and breakfast without my knowing or prodding! it sounds like he is definitely more than fwb, but he also sounds like he is slow to commit.  if you have to cry for a while, do it, alone or with friends. we go out and hold hands, he pays for me, etc etc. he said our friendship is more important than anything so if i can’t have a physical relationship with him and be friends than we could just be friends alone. was away in europe for a couple months and he contacted me once, but i was super distant and he didn’t contact me again. because if that’s the case then everything he’s doing right now means nothing… i just don’t understand how he can say he does not want a relationship any time soon but act as though were already in one? just because a man enjoys affection in the moment, doesn’t mean he’s ready to sign a lease. he was not paying for her ticket and it was not a date. we talked for awhile, and then over the course of the next few weeks starting hanging out more and more.. but then the next day he told me that he didn’t want to continue with this because he might get back with his ex over the weekend. i guess my question really is, just because he’s not ready for any sort of commitment now does that mean he won’t be in time? the guy who's in it for the nookie cares less about your feelings and more about his potentially missed texts, calls, fb messages and bbms. he has been given medicine for bipolar disorder, depression, and anxiety, but no longer takes anything. there are many guys out there – don’t settle for someone who doesn’t know what he wants and doesn’t treat you respectfully. almost every guy i know or have ever known will do this. personally, i think the next move or phone call should be his.… what if a hook up becomes very regular, displays quite a bit of affection in public (around people we had discussed should not be aware of said “hooking up”), allows you to be alone in his house while hes at an appointment, buys you coffee, makes you breakfast, provides you with a new toothbrush and insists you spend a majority of the day with him while going out of his way to be affectionate? neither of you are defective, you just want slightly different things. i couldnt, and i was so scarred, and i told my guy – we had a online chat – he told me i should have taken him off life support. he gets drunk and tells me that he can’t be with me and then apologises the next morning profusely begging that he hopes he hasn’t ruined his chances with me. i don’t know his reasons because i of course can’t read his mind, but if i’m not mistaken he drove all the way down just to see me because in that weekend he only saw the friend he drove down with, the friend who let him stay at his place, me, and his brother. the girls he flirts with he tells me that they are just his friends or are his friends girlfriends. if he doesn’t but seems apologetic or remorseful, give him a later day that works. whether you want to continue being sexual is up to you, but you can definitely take a step back in terms of the frequency of contact, and you might gently explain to him that personal questions about your feelings for your ex, etc. all of our hanging out has a solid intent behind it – either studying, or cuddling, or sex. i also don’t want to be the one to ask, because there have been a couple times we discussed it (briefly) via text messaging, and he indicated that he “definitely likes sex with me, but also really enjoys hanging out with me. an acquaintance from 3 years ago messaged me on facebook asking how i am, how’s my boy, to which i replied, we broke up and then he joked, so that means i can take you out right?, i don’t need advice or anything but i just would like to say that i read a lot of these comments and this article is really good. but something happened this past weekend he spoke to one of his friends ” therapy talk” about i guess this one girl and me. he made it clear that he still was just not ready. he would get upset every time my phone went off, and kept asking me questions about how i feel about my ex, trying to make sure that we were definitely over. we broke things off, he remained very friendly and i was also. started to hook up 1-2 times a week for a month and a half now, without sex though. i have asked him before if he has done this with any of his other sex buddies and he says that he has, but yet when we went over to his friends house they said it was nice to see him with a girl for a change.) we make small talk on facebook when we’re both online; somestimes i start it, sometimes he does. when he woke up i asked him what we are. the guy i’m seeing says if i had more freedom he would love to date me but it’s hard because of this and i agree. the things that got me worried were that we talked a lot about sex (he said that it showed attraction); and we did not hang out as much recently ( he said that because he always had to close in the weekend at 10:30 and when we did, there was not much to do), and that he wasn’t attentive enough since sometimes he didn’t text me for 2 days ( and he said that he was too busy with everything going on. he’s started to add more kissing, he’s now clasping hands, and being snuggly with me. who has known us since the beginning says there’s no way he doesn’t have feelings and that it’s obviously not about the sex if he rarely makes a move even though we see each other a few times a week.  he again started on about what we were doing, if everything was ok etc. until he knows where he wants this to go, i think that is very, very risky for you. i don’t know, i’d probably go for the kiss, but i’m impulsive that way., i’ll say again – it is way too early for you to be feeling anxious. here’s the thing: if he just wanted a one-night stand, then he isn’t looking for a girlfriend and isn’t a good match for you right now. we talked once a couple days after that, a basic “hi, how are you” talk and after that i didn’t see him at all for about a week during which time i decided i was probably just a failed one night stand for him, but this past week hes said hi to me a couple times, the first time i ignored him, then felt bad and the second i just said hi back, and i think he wants to talk to me. that would be more ok if i were more confident about things, but again i feel unsure. a recent study revealed men place women into marry-or-don’t-marry boxes – ladders, if you will – extremely quickly. i didn’t offer because i wanted him for myself by any means no. we don’t usually do back-to-back get togethers so it threw me for a loop but sure. the worst part is he basically ignores me in class and is so hot and cold. he continually came to my side and engage in the conversation i was having (or just stood there by me) or he offered to get me a drink (even though he knows i don’t drink); he even walked me to get a taxi (even though nothing happened there – he seemed to be somewhat scared). would advise you to take a deep breath, there’s a good chance he’s going through all the same anxieties, wondering if he came on too strong with cuddling-style behavior, etc. he comes over every other night or so, and he even spends the night. and of course now that we are sleeping together i’m getting all “girlie” lol please help me sort this out. now i knw he dsnt hav a qwerty keyboard and i knw i dnt annoy him cuz im chill but i like him. the past year 2009/2010 school year there was this guy me and him got together in october, dating and cuddling and sex. i don’t know if he said the truth or if he is just pulling away. i was shocked (he really is a sweet guy, i wouldnt describe him as manipulative at all) and i gently told him that i wasnt interested in a relationship with him, just an optimal friends with benefits, and that perhaps it might be a good idea to space out our hookups/not text each other 24/7 and limit our affectionate tendencies in order for this to be more fwb-like. i responded just saying that i saw it and i enjoyed reading it and glad he was doing well. i have been in a 3 year relationship that was amazing, but then i came for an exchange program in a different country. we are still talking basically every day, even when im not in town for the weekend we talk on the phone at least once or twice and text also, we are hanging out during the week we went to happy hour one week with his friends and just him and i got food after, i brought him cupcakes for his birthday the other week and just the two of us hungout, on the weekends we will meet up to get food after going out (or sometimes we will go out together it just depends) and then i usually end up staying there and we have started having sex again. susan, i know you’re not a psychic or anything but basically i really need an opinion, severely!  there is no one else and he does not want anyone else we are exclusive and i said if i met another guy (relationship type) i would stop what we have together, this is when he started to get wierd and was like “no you don’t have to do that we can still see each other, i’d be fine about it”.  at what point do you stop giving the guy more chances?  we chatted some more, then he said he had to leave and would text me. it sounds like he has never fallen for anyone before, or allowed himself to become attached. making out was great but the sex was a flop from my perspective (i was clearly more experienced). all of our texts had a purpose usually) but there would be some flirty moments of courseso this time i initiated the date- asking and we planned the place and everything together.. he finds out about midway trough last semester i have been hanging out with our mutual guy friends roommate and asks me 4 times in the following weeks if i’m dating the guy after we hadn’t hooked up for a while. we’ve always been very flirty but i was married and he had a girlfriend who he ended up having a child with. then another night at the bar we danced and ended up making out on the dance floor, he took me back to his dorm and we just made out for awhile, talked and watched a movie and then he walked me home later that night. i’m sure he is eager to get some sexual experience, but you are correct to be suspicious of his motives. i facebook messaged him saying sorry and thank you for what he has done for me. he was very sad in his tone when we were talking on the phone. we also have the most amazing sex i’ve ever had in my life…. i don’t know…i wish dating was easier than this. i apologize for the delay – the oldest one goes back several weeks. that wednesday he asked me to sit with him at this all faith mass at my school, but he had to rush off right after bc he had a meeting (he is really busy, has two jobs) he didnt text me till friday at 7:00 asking “what r u doing tonight? do you think he just not ready yet to introduce me to his friends or family or that he is just not thinking about it… im confuse cause i don’t know the rules of dating… i don’t know when do you become the girlfriend or if guys even ask this days… help! we were on and off the past year i know on one of our off times i had another guy(b) im pretty sure he(a) was jelous of this one(b). there’s something unfortunate (and perhaps unfair) that the person who feels more gets blamed. he has hooked up with a few girls before he met me here. new year's eve rolls around and we spend it together, he kisses me at midnight, then tells me his resolution is to be celibate for awhile, but he invites me to stay the night (which i declined due to work in the morning). i texted him that night telling him a long list of how i feel about this, how i felt he’s not putting as much effort and stuff. and i feel like i know the answer, but he has mentioned hanging out in the daytime three times, although not concretely, and his actions and words didn’t seem like someone not interested in more than sex (eg holding hands and eye contact during). i realized that day that i’ve never met anyone just so similar to me. he said that he meant nothing by the texts, and he was just trying to assess whether i was into him based on my replies, and was doing this to avoid hurting me. if you don’t hear from him by saturday at noon, text him (“hey how are you doing” not “are we going out tomorrow? so, lets hope it’s for that and not for my flight tickets….’ve been trying to let this go and i found your website and decided to just get it out one time in hopes of finally having some clarity! and he hides his feelings well, so instead of just waiting to talk to him in person i spoke before i thought and sent him an email telling him that i just didn’t want to just hook up everytime i saw him, i wanted to know what was on his mind. couldn’t explain it but just something about him somehow got me attracted to him. making out with somebody you’ve gone on a couple of dates with and/or hung out with just the two of you is not abnormal or slutty behavior.,After we had sex i told him that he should consider himself “lucky” b/c i’m very picky with who i choose to hook up with.” i could feel the tension rising and his nervousness so i put my hand on his chest, stroked his forehead and told him not to worry about it, that he didn’t have to think about it at that exact moment and just to relax. i just gotta have the balls to straight out ask him what’s going. however, i am not always comfortable with him paying non stop, so i insist doing it myself sometimes. he moved back to his parents house, just 8 hrs away from where i live and a few days later on new years eve/day, he spent hours just texting me and focusing on me while at a party when most people would be having fun and just partying the night away. night, he just said hi, but didn’t really pay much attention to me when i showed up to see another one of his friends for a minute that’s just in town for the weekend. he also is recently divorced, father of two, he raises his children also, and his ex has them on the same weekends as my ex. when i tried to end things he called me 15 or more times till i picked up crying saying he couldnt be without me in his life and that if i stop talking to him he will never be even friends with me and cut me off because thats the only way he could get over me. background info: he holds a partnership in multiple businesses that require him to work odd hours.. you hung out for a few weeks, and made out but he didn't try for sex. kind of picked back up where we left off at. i’ve never felt like this before about a boy… ah, it’s like i’m on cloud nine.

Excuse me but are we dating or hooking up

if i had to guess i would say that he is confused or ambivalent about his ex, you, all of it. online dating is great, but there is a lot of rejection involved. we are both in our thirties, we met online, the first time we met in person something clicked just right and literally sparked: a short mid afternoon date ended up lasting for almost 6 h during which we did not stop looking at each other eyes, smiled stupidly, and talked about tons of deep things, discovering we actually share even the most rare of habits, tastes and thoughts. the fwb code reframes that person as “in the wrong” for breaking the agreement, but it’s an agreement that can’t be legislated so to speak. i would like to keep him interested, and maybe it would progress into more than sex? no guy, no ex for that matter even, has made me feel so loved before, ironically. the whole recurrent hooking up fizzled out after the bad sex. i want to tell him he has nothing to worry about but last time i did he ran away and i thought i scared him off or lost him. do you think something has shifted or am i being paranoid! he says i would be his girlfriend if these thing were different. i don’t really have any doubts that he is interested in me, and likes me, but i want to know how to realize if he is in it for sex, or for more. he hasn’t told anyone, not even his family or friends about me. the whole summer i was mostly thinking about him and skeptical about all the times we was in school and looked on random sights about signs of him liking me and they seem to match. during my first time 3 weeks prior to meeting this girl. definitely sounds like he’s fallen for you, but be careful. he even dried my hair for me after and dressed me after.. if you feel very strongly about him, it might be better to cool it for a while – not hang out so much, and pursue the friendship when you're really over him. i have seen him for the longest time, and when i look at him i mess up on the music i’m supposed to be playing (if that’s any indication of my physical attraction towards him). if he is just looking for casual sex, then he’s unlikely to change his mind. i really do like him and he appears to like me but i dont want to push him away by making him think i am wanting more or moving to fast does it appear he is devloping feelings or am i simply over reacting or mis reading the situation? i know that isn’t easy to find, but being alone for a while is better than being taken advantage of. when his daughter, age two, would be over, i’d go over after she went to sleep and leave before she woke up. how do i broach this with him so it does not sound like i am needy cos i’m not would just like to know whats he thinks is happening cos i have no idea. but i am begginning to fall for him and i want to see if we are on the same page. bottom line, i want to get to know him, to communicate better, and have what you call “the talk” or some version of it. it was like we both got scared and ran away to our comfort zones (the ex’s, and his ex would always be trying to talk to him from what i remember, and show she cared, i didnt really do that much =/ i didnt wanna be clingy). the first time we hung out we just took a walk and talked. almost every guy i know or have ever known will do this. during this time he talked about his strong feelings for me, how amazing i am, etc. i don’t think he drove down for another reason because his brother ended up going to visit his family for the holidays a few days after that so i took it that the main reason he came down was for me. “i forgot how beautiful you were,” and a sweet kiss. it hurt me but at the same time, i just understood cause he was there by himself and probably felt lonely. im just confused i just wantvto know if he likes me and how i can play this right. i was kind of doing it for fun at the beginning.. it seems like their relationships tend to last for quite a while, or they only date people he think they will last with. you have an update, let me know, and i’ll try to answer right away. or maybe im just reading too much into it all?. does he actually have feelings for me or is it just a hook up? i don’t want to text or call because i don’t want to feel like i am nagging- what should i do? this week, during one of our text convos, he casually bring up first when i’ll be “coming up” to his city… and i say this long weekend! when i say just kidding, he smiles big and all is happy-dandy., do you think it would be forward or presumptuous of me to send him a little text to let him know he’s on my mind or hope you’re having a good weekend, etc? hasn’t made a move yet, no kissing or even holding my hands, nothing sexual… so im starting to feel insecure… im not sure if it is that he is been respectful and wants to take things slow or that he doesn’t like me.. what should my course of action be, at the end of the night when she kissed me we agreed we would see each other wednesday, since she will be busy for the rest of the weekend since she has another midterm tomorrow. before we get any deeper i know im gonna have to stand up and have the talk. so that kind of leads me to believe that he’s interested in the “hook-up” more than anything. they thought we’d hit it off, and that we did. i think im going to need a shot before i do that hahathank you sooooo much for taking the time to read and respond to my messages! now i am second guessing and wondering if he doesn’t think i’m as pretty in person, or the chase is off now because he got the prize, etc…. but he continued to text and call and ask if we can have dinner, i kept saying no. if a guy knows that the is not committed and can pull back at any time, or have sex with someone else, he may thoroughly enjoy your company in all the ways you describe. fling or infatuation may be just the beginning of a more intimate and lasting relationship. is he just fooling around with all this or am i being skeptical? you’ve been letting the dog bury his bone in you for the past three years, and yet you feel too awkward to just talk it out with him? he’s definitely not your conventional guy, and not up for titles. in the beginning, we always texted back and forth and he always had really cute things to say to me, like compliments not just on what i look like but personality as well.: i was, i’m just asking on a friendly basis. does he want to, or does he only sleep over when you ask him to? a week later he texted that the voicemail was incoherent and he finally figured out who it was.. stops for a little bit of friendly small talk, and then carries on their way. conduct is not okay, and i was stunned and it felt horrible. i would’ve thought that the cold-shoulder and just plain ignoring him would be enough, but he does not give up his pursuit. we asked him once about where it was going and if we had a good chance and he said yes.” maybe i should give this a little bit more time? i am not going to lie; i know i am a very attractive girl so i never thought i would grow feelings for this guy. gets jealous whenever i text someone or someone texts me. if he fell for you as you are, he has no right to ask you to change your appearance – that would be like you demanding he get jacked at the gym. we dated and he asked me out and i turned him down. it does sound like he made a real effort, though, like it was about more than sex. entire week, he didnt text me, not even when the weekend came. at first he said that he wasnt looking for a relationship. am 23 and am currently seeing a man 10 years my senior. a month ago i met this great guy on a dating website and today we went on our 4th date. she passed out on one of the couches in a house we went to- so i asked the guys who owned the house if we could spend the night.“phone or not, i would think if he hadn’t lost that comfort, and if he was really interested in me, he would be calling even if from a pay phone. are fine and well, but charm alone does not carry enough weight. i think i’m not fully committing a crush here because he is a commitment phobe and always pulls back from me when we have deeper convos – he did this even when we were just friends. (there was some kissing involved as well 🙂 ) and he gave me some very nice compliments… *blushes*so for the next few weeks we would hang out and cuddle in his room and there was an occasional hookup or two- sometimes it would be after *some* drinking (no sex, i’m a virgin, but he isn’t- he knows that)then randomly after we sort of had a date(he asked me)- we went out to dinner and then hooked up completely sober- he stopped texting me. most people also think that he is trying to keep me close, but also at arm’s reach because he is trying to make sure i will fit into his new life, figure out his future, and decide if he wants to trust me again after all the rejection before he decides either way. i want him to be into me more than that… i can see him as a future boyfriend or something serious. he may find you attractive or even like you but feels the timing is not right. both times we’ve hooked up, i spent the night and he wrapped his arm around me all night and throughout the morning. 3) when we’re together and his parents call, he’ll say he’s with friends or he’s at work. if you are 29, ready to meet someone for a serious relationship, and as much fun as it sounds like from this story, you will be in high demand. he told me that he understood where i came from, he was trying to keep in touch with me as much as he could, or he was giving me a lot of the free time he barely had. made plans to spend the entire day with me saturday and we did, nothing fancy, went to lunch and did a little shopping. i couldn’t believe how gorgeous she was and how much we connected. this guy gives me crazy mixed signals and it is hard for me to tell whether he likes me as more than just a friend. and as for him, i didnt ask, but i doubt he is. of course he’s in no hurry, but it’s different for women. this will be a bit long, just because i have so much in my mind. venting is more towards guys and why they are the way they are. he had just gotten out of a long term relationship and so had i, but i decided to hang out with him a few days later anyways. if he had real feelings, he would not have been eager to go hook up with other people, even if you were the one who suggested it. their relationship didn't last long at all, just a few weeks really. week after that i bumped in to him again, briefly.: guess this just means we need to see each other more often 🙂. he has told me that he finds me to be very provocative and he’s used the word cute. he also teases me about how ‘i need space’ and how he wishes he could see me more often, but cant, because of my ‘boundaries’. again i’d like to say before, during, and after the intimate time, we still had a full on conversation catching up and he was still asking me questions and questions still wanting to know more about me. he put effort into making you laugh (a big one for me)?: not sure where kara is, but my other two roomates are at my friends house, i had to skype home bc of family stuff, now just relaxing 🙂. well he ended up moving 2 hours away for a job and we text all the time and he says he wants me to move there with him and keeps asking and asking. if you or a guy roll over after "the deed" is done into the arms of an iphone, chances are good that you're just a booty call.  he was also really odd again about the idea that i may be just using him for sex too…. i hope things will eventually work out with us and that at some point he will be ready to commit but i just dont know…can you please help me out and shed some light on the situation i am in? and i don’t know if i should continue to see him because there is a factor of jealousy now on the table. ale: we never actually “hooked-up”, and thank god for that. do know he is a very affectionate cuddler by nature and likes public displays of affection and that he certainly made me feel that way when we met. talk basically every day and i went out with him and every time i would see him talking to one of his friends (girl) i would walk up and he would instantly hug me and kiss me in front of everyone and say, “this is my ‘bestest’ friend”. is he attentive to your sexual needs/wants or does he just get his? we have talked a few times and texted maybe once or twice…i don’t know if this guy likes me or what! i had started to develop feelings for him too so i told him and all seemed well. if he wants to make the commitment, that this is something real and serious, and that you are going to be in each other’s lives, you will embark on a whole new relationship that should include a lot more than being in bed together. i urge women to wait for someone who will make his interest and intent clear. susan/badger,let me start by saying i am a 40 year old woman who is just returning to the dating world after a 20 year marriage. but i realize i'm letting him do this to me, so it's up to me to stand up for myself.. a guy who asks for your number and asks you out the same night is displaying strong interest, unless he makes it clear it's "just friends. we have been hooking up for about a month now. at the end of the work day, i asked him if there was something wrong and he seemed really embarassed. if he really had respected me and had feelings for me wouldn’t that question not make sense? so here’s the latest, and if any of these don’t seem like indicators otherwise, feel free to say so!), does not seem to care much about learning what things i like, does not seem to want to see me more than once per week, has never complimented me, and his profile is still on the online site (mine is as well…). i hope you are not still hooking up with this asshole. but we would still stay in touch with msn or with facebook from time to time and when he came to visit. it sounds like he had a great vacation fling for a few weeks, but feels no sense of obligation or wish to be in any kind of regular, ongoing contact. ” and as he leaves he says ” i just wanted to make sure you were ok and try to put a smile on your face ” or driving 30 mins at 1am to come be with me so i wasn’t alone when i found out that my friend had passed. my friend encouraged me to email him just making simple conversation and he responded back pretty much telling me he noticed me and wanted to hang out., he might think you are not a girl for a "one and done" hookup. remember, men can compartmentalize b/w hooking up and love. about two weeks ago he said that we should stop having sex (we hooked up twice) because he doesn’t want it to complicate things with us living so close (we both own our houses) and that if we dated it could be the best thing in the world or the worst.” and i responded stupidly because i guess i didn’t understand what he was saying so i responded with the city that i met up with him and he said the city and connected it with a country that had the same city that we were in. he’s supportive of my goals, very attentive when we’re together, and makes a conscious effort to lay off the phone unless it’s absolutely necessary to place a call/email. if he leaves you, then he was never in for the relationship at the first place. the (short version) conversation went like this (ps this was yesterday night):z: jesus you didnt even answer my question.  please help i am mega confused by all this and thinking seriously of bailing completely on him for good. or perhaps he really does want to see how things go, or might even be determined to keep things casual. if it’s fwb, then long, soulful chats about what you’re doing are just making the dynamic between the two of you more complicated. first of all i need to applaud you for your advice (and your flowchart)! later that night another girl tried to kiss him and he just flat out denied her- didn’t give her a reason. he came over again this weekend, all was great, we had great sex, mammoth deep chats etc. well, right after the friend and i started working together there was some very intense flirting, we even got to the what are you looking for in a life partner conversation (strangely enough we are pretty much exactly what the other is looking for). i said he doesn’t have to feel bad about it as we are doing what we both find conveinient and we both enjoy each others company etc. which is obviously fair enough because we have only been talking for a month. if he did get hurt by the previous gf, he may not be ready for another commitment. there are many factors to why we both agree we aren’t dating. anyway, last year i changed jobs and started to work with a lot of people and i’ve become a little more sociable. i don’t know if your still even answering this question but i came across it in hopes of answering my situation. i don’t think i’m really ready for a serious relationship but am not real good at this “hooking up” thing. been texting on and off since we both left our uni (we live far away from each other) and the conversation always moves towards whether im seeing anyone at home “so, any hot dates? i’m a very selective person and i am aware of who i like/who i don’t and am picky because i don’t want just anyone! he also said that he wasn’t sure that we had feelings enough to date one another. is this a communication issue, or does this indicate a noncommitment from one or both of us? can’t really lay expectations on him that aren’t his style, that’s a form of nagging and will make him disappear. he is home every 5-10 days for a day, then back out. the research shows is that early sex is not a barrier to a relationship if both parties went into it interested in a relationship. however i dont understand his angle, and what he wants from me." they're deflating, and moreover, they are clear indicators that your relationship is nothing but -- and will be nothing more -- than a hookup. the contact has been pretty even between us, though we go a day or two without talking sometimes. it was quite romantic, he had a fire waiting for me (which he knows i love). we saw each other my chance again when i was walking to office hrs and he was biking from class.: does your crush like you as more than a friend? that’s how we fell asleep and he wrapped his legs between mine and spooned me the entire night. im not sure exactly what else happened through out the night because both of us were intoxicated, but every time he talked to a girl he’d look back at me and smile and every time i talked to a guy he’d do the same. at the end of the date, he walked me to my car and i said so “i had a lot of fun, you should give me a call” he replied “i had fun too but you seem to have a busy week” and i said well how about next sunday? i had a feeling that she wasn’t going to be there any longer or he lost interested. but, does it even matter if we are just friends with benefits? anyway just a few nights ago he got pretty drunk and i picked him up and the whole drive back to my place which was about 20 mins he’s telling me how happy he was that i was with him and he must have said “i like you alot lisa, like really alot” at least 20 times … no exaggeration! we agreed not to talk about any r/s issues until his exams are over partly because i didn’t feel much for him initially. after we hooked up he stayed for like four more hours trying to get to know me and cuddling with me, and during our conversations he would randomly touch my arm, hair, kiss me, etc…  how do i know if he is just interested in hooking up or if he may eventually want more? i finally asked him when he was leaving the country and he told me next week he was going and it crushed me. he said i just dont want to hurt you and i dont want to get hurt, i know im very affectionate and that can be confusing but i guess iif you’re not thinking about any of that then were on the same page. he flirted with me on and off ans showed minor signs he liked me but i never caught cause really i didnt expect someone as popular as he was to like someone like me who was low key. the other night, i picked up a pizza and went to his place to get some studying done- which did happen, but again, one thing led to another. when we first starting texting it was every few days or so and then before i knew it we have been texting everyday, he usually texts me before he goes to sleep and in the morning when he wakes. he told me in the beginning he just wanted to be friends, but he never introduces me as such, and now seems to be getting into arguments with me or getting annoyed with me. 4 months in i got really drunk and ended up hooking up with a guy i found very attractive and had some flirty tension with every time i spoke to prior during my time here. best friend says they haven’t talked much about it (he moved north so they talk less), but that i should go for it.: what does your birth order say about your dating style? so here’s my story…start off with i’m 24, the involved guy is 43… we attend school together and have for the past two years. felt like i had soo many questions and decided to send him an email basically telling him that what i wrote before wasn’t what i meant and what i meant was that i enjoyed our friendship before and i realize that i can’t do the in between because i can’t handle it and i have feelings. i sometimes hear about stories where things are going well then all of a sudden the guy starts acting weird because feelings start getting too intense. other day he told me he cancel his online account (dating website) because he didn’t want to pay again, i try to access his profile and its true, is not active anymore. so we went on our first date about 3 weeks ago and on that date after about 10 hours of bein together just talking and enjoying learning about eachother he held my hand and said, it’s quite obvious that we both like eachother but i just want you to know that i’m not looking to jump i to anything, i just want to go with the flow.. he told you in the beginning he just wanted to be friends? don’t try to be his friend – that just means more sex when he finds it convenient.’m going to be frank, it sounds like you guys are just placeholding for each other until one or both of you find someone else to really connect with. there are so many conflicting signals and emotions in this story, it’s impossible to know what either of you is feeling. your current situation isn’t making you miserable, and you can enjoy the relationship for what it is, then i’d see where it leads. i met this guy online we being talking for a couple of weeks so this sunday we went on the first date. long story short, he comes over, we talk and have great conversation and eventually hook up. met this guy in around january at an exhibition when he came with a friend of mine and as soon as i saw him i was attracted to him, and the more, as i talked to him. he did break up recently with an ex, and so did i (both of us were in long term ones) but i feel as though he doesnt want to get close to anyone in a sense. i’m just not sure if i fit in his schedule “literally. we did and were laughing and talking a lot until he asked if he could kiss me. he is going out of town to vegas for his job and asked me to come along he would pay for my ticket and all my accomodations we have talked about sex on several occasions and i suppose there is an expectation of sex on this trip my question is is he only in it for the sex? i have feelings for him but i can also shut out my feelings as well. he toned himself down to make sure it wasn’t too much for me and didn’t put me last. so we did and we were just watching tv and talking. from what i know he is a very or used to be a rather promiscuous men who “likes variety”. he said no problem, “i can give you that and so much more. there’s this guy that i have liked for a long time and he never really liked me back. i am going to riff on your words and what they mean to men (e. he constantly says that he thinks im beautiful and exotic, and lately hes been emphasizing about traits that are more personality-related. he continues to come by my office to have coffe, we talk and we exchange things. when those don't pan out, come last call, texts go flying out in an attempt for some late-night loving. should i just ask him what is it that he wants from me? you don’t understand why it’s complicated, or where you stand.– asked me to sleep with my head on his chest, made sure i was comfortable and was staring at me on his chest sleeping (i woke up suddenly to make sure my big head didn’t make his arm fall asleep and he couldn’t close his eyes fast enough!  normally, i find myself making excuses for the guys i like, but i want to see this situation for what it is. he just didn’t seem fake with me and he always seemed to be trying to figure me out and learning more about me, emotionally and mentally, not physically. i know that you wish he was the one for you, but i don’t believe he is.  out of curiosity, i asked if he was looking for a relationship, and he said maybe, but he wasn’t willing to rush into things and wanted to see what direction things took.!    i figured it helps me to write about it to try and get it clear in my head but then again maybe i am just deluding myself. he asked for my number after having a little talk. but when she wasn’t there, we’d sleep in and he offered that i stay there while he went to work and just “lock up before i left”. although we haven’t talked much about it, i know his girlfriend was the one to end their relationship. only see each other on weekdays, or if on weekends, after last call. after by chance again (we didnt text to meet) he saw me sitting outside reading and joined me, and we hung out for like 20 min. that night he finally kissed me and it just felt so wonderful. i still like him, but i’m not sure if i should talk to him again or if i was really just a one time thing for him. he’ll bring me my favourite candy on a study date) he is territorial – much of his facebook has to do with me, which is more or less a public indicator of all the time we spend with each other (his ex has taken note 🙁 she has expressed her dislike at the situation – shes not over him) most importantly, if another guy starts flirting with me he will get concerned and interrogate (and plays it off humourously – “designed to elicit information” hits the nail on the head perfectly) i have a best guy friend at university who’s girlfriend happens to be my best friend back home (the three of us are really close) i have to convince my guy frequently that i dont have feelings for my best friend, and the one time that the two of them chatted with each other, my guy acted rather hostile to my best friend.” and when i answer “you just want me to miss you and like you, which doesn’t mean i do” he would say “yes”.“im afraid to ask my friends about it bc i feel like they are judging me for kissing him/making out wednesday night and him not being my boyfriend., later he was glued to my side and very touching, caressing, and just very attentive to me.

Are we just hooking up or dating

we end up waking up putting her in her crib, and fall back asleep.– intertwines his fingers with mine as we spoon to fall asleep. you susan,I have been dating this guy for about 5 months, but it’s not a real relationship, it’s just friends with benefits. he spent the night and stayed at my apartment while i went to work the next day…. the only answer is for you to tell him clearly that you don’t think the two of you would be good together. sometimes we meet the perfect person for us but the timing isn’t right – we’re with someone else, we’re unsettled geographically, or we’re healing from a bad relationship he just playing around, being comfortable with me until he finds someone better who comes along, or would he not mean what he said and waste as much time. the fact that your relationship is mostly just sex as opposed to spending time together outside the bedroom is another clue. here’s how it started: when i started my job back in march of 2009 (i’m a housekeeper) there was a young gentleman who was working the front desk at the hotel. he may or may not be telling the truth but i feel it doesn’t correlate with how we were all these years. susan,well this is still doing my head in, as per my previous posts. i don’t know his reasons because i of course can’t read his mind, but if i’m not mistaken he drove all the way down just to see me because in that weekend he only saw the friend he drove down with, the friend who let him stay at his place, me, and his brother. so since he lives in another city far from mine, after i came back home i invited him to come for a visit as he did. that night, he started to text me more and more and we hung out on a regular basis, like 4 times a week. it states on his profile that he is looking for a long-term relationship. shows of affection or sex do not mean he wants to get “committed. he has told you point blank that he sees you as a friend and nothing more. from a male perspective, it might be a sweet deal – no obligations, no explanations required, sex pretty much whenever you’re in the mood, and great sex at that. also, you may have plans for sunday – that is still five days away. (his job had a retreat for teambuilding kinda stuff on sat and sun)he never respondedtuesday we had a club fair at out school, and i was there with my business frat and to look at the other orgs. thanks, again, for responding and for the tactful method that you suggested. so i met this guy 6 yrs ago in college, wasn’t really attracted to him and didn’t really say much to him at all and then one day it just hit me. communicating what you are feeling now and finding out what he’s thinking is the best way to prevent that – for both of you. but its kept secret…he hooksup wih other girls and does not keep it a secretn he says its for our friends sake. the first couple of times that i have been over we would just make out. he treats me nice and everything but i still wont let it grow to something more so i`ll talk to him about it and see how it`ll all work out in the end. back to my birthday, on my birthday i had sex with her for a good hour and a half pretty much sober had one or two shots earlier in the eve and i wasn’t able to finish without my friend “pamela handerson” ;).: hey ___ hope the retreat went well 🙂 goodluck on the sunday night homework! you don’t have to be emo and clingy about it – just ask him very directly what’s up. we are both from latino backgrounds so maybe its a cultural thing. all relationships carry an element of risk, and you will only ruin things if you need answers too soon. in one way or another we maintain some kind of contact when we are not physically together. might be just making sure he's going to keep getting no-strings sex. generally don’t put any time or energy into platonic friendships with women.. their friends do not even know you exist in their world.,“he has told me of that’s all he wanted he wouldn’t have stuck around for awhole year. we haven’t had sex yet, but i am wondering if we should or if that would be a bad move. also, there’s a period early on where both parties are getting to know each other, and shouldn’t necessarily be held accountable for their intentions regarding a relationship. mean, ideally you could just talk it out with these guys and see where the relationship was heading, or what they wanted out of it, but let's be real, guys are liars and sometimes we don't even know ourselves.. texts or facebook or skype (we communicated with each other a lot via all these. we weren’t building enough of an emotional connection though, after hooking up, not like we did when it was just a friendship. met up with a guy last weekend that i know casually from church. you don’t have to say you are not attracted, just that you have decided it’s not a good idea to pursue it. i dont want to invest in him emotionally, but at the same time, he is definitely someone i would consider being a part of my life in the future, he has all of the qualities im looking for in a man. don’t know why he wouldn’t just leave me alone instead of dragging everything up. there are too many women around him i think and he is a guy that would attract women very easily (eh, libra), and i feel he would not ignore the opportunities… i don’t know whether he is just playing his game, i can’t believe how much affectionate someone can be while acting on the other hand.” then he automatically corrects himself with: “i mean, another guy. women don’t want it to be too easy – any whiff of eager or supplicating and our attraction nosedives. and since i’m so insecure on this subject i’ve never felt he was really into me but strangely, now sometimes, i can feel his interest – i’ve noticed he seems more attentive and i catch him staring at me more frequently. you just have to keep each other updated no matter what. don’t get what’s so great about this guy, especially as you say he never goes out of his way for you. i complained that i wasn’t looking for a relationship, just sex but every guy i tried the arrangment with ended up wanting to date. long story short he moved away and recently moved back to town. i’ve just grown feelings for this guy and i’m not sure if i should just walk away and give up because i know my father would never allow it or keep having a secret relationship until i do get more freedom. cut it short, we had a meal and drinks together that night, sat up until late, had sex and slept all hugging until i had to go to work. wonder what would it take for a man to not call in a situation like this? out of that arrangement, and wait for a guy who is interested in a relationship. we spent about a week together that was really good. thank you for your help 🙂oh and i forgot to say, concerning the ‘hooking up’, it wasn’t just a physical thing. my heart dropped and i guess i realized then that we probably wouldn’t be getting in a relationship because i figured it would be impossible to do when separated like that. 8 months ago i started working (non-official capacity) in a law enforcement agency in a large metro area which i enjoyed immensely. then he said he wanted to just sleep with me and that if i just wanted to sleep with him. for leaving a comment, i appreciate your taking the time to visit several of my posts! quotes about love that are way too real (because yeah, we've all been there). but we didn’t exchange numbers or anything; we just saw it i think as a chance encounter, plus he knew i’d just gotten out of a relationship. do they seem like he cares as more than just fwb? i don’t see any evidence at all he was just going after a one-night stand. im scared of getting hurt which is why we never had the dtr talk. so i acted like i didnt fancy him like everyone else which i think is why he showed me some interest from the start.. so i don’t know what to do, for me is really hard to make a move because i don’t know what he is thinking and im a little shy too. is he just using her while he flirts with someone else? so we wrote back and forth and finally decided to hang out again. lolit’s not only when he is drunk that he expresses his emotion, that was just an example. well, one thing led to another and we ended up having sex.  if you sleep with a guy before you really get to know each other then that is all he will be looking forward to is my belief. he doesn’t even live where i live (for now) and i don’t know how far i want it to go. we’ve been talking non-stop, and his friends all know about it every time we hang out. all due respect to your sharing your story, he has repeatedly stated what he does and doesn’t want. he’s more than just a hook-up, but not a boyfriend. he could be over her and just want to have fun for now, and it’s fine seeing as i can’t blame him for not wanting to hop right into another relationship so soon. it’s so hard, but you have to think of this experience as filtering out boys who are not right for you. does not mean that this is enough for me to simply close my eyes and say: do as you please! i want us to talk it out so that we can make sure we’re on the same page. we (me and my friend) have been talking a lot lately, even before we hooked up. it still felt the same like before but what had changed is he doesn’t want me with anyone else. i met this guy (we'll call him boy a) 7 years ago at a summer camp. so either way, if i make a decision i see myself getting hurt so it’s much easier to have someone make this decision for me that way i can’t hold myself accountable.’re both looking forward to when i get back to his city on business in a week…. he does not call often as he is busy and is very independent, but call every 2-3 days and clearly says he enjoys being with me and want to keep dating. since then we’ve seen each other about once or twice a week, at least once a week, and i’ve stayed at his house about three times. if going on dates is something you want in your relationship then you should be concerned about it for sure. we started the night off at 5pm, and she didn’t leave until 8am the next morning (no sex).’m checking in on this very old thread, and i will answer all outstanding questions to the best of my ability. so i explained to him about my past relationship and that i didn’t think i was ready and he totally understood and we left it in the past. treated me like his girlfriend all day,he even invited his friends over for lunch which was a shock to me but i didnt mind it much,later on in the evening he took me out to dinner and things were hitting up for us,he showed lot of affection to the point of the waiter complimenting me for having such a sweet guy,lol! in fact, he wanted me back over tonight after he went to the movies.. its now been almost 2 months… should i ask him, if he likes me just as a friend or something more? we got chatting online and told him if he’s not too busy he could come to my friends and the three of us could just hang out. andrew was always an amazing shoulder to cry on and about 6 months later (november 2010), we ended up hooking up sober. i have not chased him or contacted him at all. he took me to dinner and invited me over for movies, and we basically had sex on the 5th day ( i made the first move). i also know that i have to bring these walls down if i were to ever get into a serious relationship. he told me straight that he has feelings for me and i told him i do too thus we decided to be exclusive. there is no potential happiness here – only misery for you. if there’s no real possibility of a future, and he is deciding to keep it casual for that reason, then falling for him is a bad idea. thanks for posting this site – i’ve been reading up on a ton of info on the web as this is my first fwb arrangement (i’m 28! i’m sorry, but i don’t have a good feeling about this at all. tell him you’ve been thinking about him, or how good it was to see him, and that you’d love to hang out again soon.” the answer is simple – men typically don’t think “wow this woman is great, she’s so great i should marry her. he asked if i wanted to go to his room and i told him that i didn’t want to sleep with him, and he said that was fine and we could just cuddle. now we can go a week without talking as in before we would talk in some form everyday.. but there seems to be a hookup culture at american universities and dating as bf/gf is rarer. we dont talk much but when we do its just simple stuff. in october i decided to end this and we just kept in touch once in  a while.. you honestly are just in it for the sex and you are mildly curious or concerned about his “falling for you. and the only way to find out what the player is thinking or planning is to ask him. the entire vegas trip he was looking out for me and really sweet, telling me how pretty i looked every night and mentioning that we had hooked up by making jokes in front of people. he just never texts me anymore unless i text him first and then it isn’t a long convo. tell him how you feel and ask if he feels the same way and can see it working out. this turned into a biweekly thing for about two months. i finally asked him when he was leaving the country and he told me next week he was going and it crushed me. he bought me flowers because he felt bad for the miscommunication. evolution does indeed happen 🙂i am so happy that you are sharing all this with many women / men who are stopping by this website. in the start it was supposed to be casual but as time went on the texting,calling and time we spend together has become a lot more frequent…like multiple times a week seeing eachother and texting everyday(but he hardly will ever text me first)now this has progressed over the last year. he won’t give me straight answers, which if he was a normal guy i would know what that meant but he is not normal! have dates outside of the house, or at the very least, outside of the bed. i originally found this article because a few of his friends have told me he’s “in love with me,” whatever that means. two weeks ago we were at a halloween party and my friends and i invited him to come and hang out with us, which he agreed to.  it seems to me its going further than just fb relationship. i am scared of putting so much energy into this awesome but temporarily insecure guy. that night he finally kissed me and it just felt so wonderful. he was really respectful and went in for a kiss, which i rejected. i obliged, and told him i went back to my long term ex bc i changed my mind about relationships and would rather be in one. it is confusing because before i gave into hanging out with him, as more than friends, it was always him texting me asking to hang out. eventually he confessed he had feelings for me and i said that i didn’t feel the same, but didn’t want things to stop. he obviously didn’t value your friendship at all, or he wouldn’t have let you end it. advice is to stop playing games and trying to pretend something you’re not feeling – being “just friends. all you answers are amazing help, i just need you to answer mine just so i can finally sleep instead of constantly thinking about it at night haha. i changed the topic and we talked about other crap for a bit and then:b: gotta admit i got used to having you around the last few weeks. i find out once we get back to school things are over with the other classmate and begin a secretive fwb relationship. that leaves you with taking a “wait and see” approach, or giving him more time.. not in your favor), you’re allowed to feel badly. finally, i had to go and while he was walking me out, he turned and asked me “where are we? to me it seems that he is pushing me away, but just far enough to just reel me back in. it’s far from ideal – asking for this clarification right now, but you need to understand as best you can so that you can make plans for your future. it sounds like he’s all talk when you’re not there, but now you’re back and he is saying “we’ll see? am stuck in a sticky situation susan and i just do not know what to think or act or do. other words, he has to decide now if he sees a possible future with you. do you react if you see each other in the workplace or school? i don’t sleep around, but it was so difficult for me to keep my hands off of him. now, i know that you have been answering about alot of different situations, so i suppose i will ask about mine too (as brief as possible ;] ). hate guys like this, and i hate it that you can’t see how worthless he is, how selfish and manipulative.: let me know the next time you want to hang out, for now i have to go to bed, have an acct test :/. (if he broke your heart, that’s a different story. can you please give me your take on it, because despite that i am tryign to convince myself that it is all nothing and stick to the initial outcomes of our conversations, i can’t help feeling confused as i think his actions often betray his words.. there’s something unfortunate (and perhaps unfair) that the person who feels more gets blamed. we’re mostly just having sex, but he invited me over earlier, had food together, hung out etc (and obviously sex as well). he is an upper classmen and has been heartbroken by a girl that he was with for a few years so i dont know if he likes me or if he is trying to play me. it sounds like the two of you are not compatible, or it would have worked the first time. spending every weekend together, meeting family and friends, daily contact – these are all behaviors of a couple! he has had a few “friends with benefits” and never ended up falling for any of them, even though they fell for him. this “thank you” bit sounded weird to me, i felt like i had done a favor or smth. months after that, i wanted to apologize to him, whether he would care or not, just wanted to get it out of my system to move on so first i wrote to him asking him how he was doing and he responded that he was doing well and all that, so i then sent an apology for what had happend before and he never responded back, so i figured either he didn’t care or i hurt him, not really sure. he’s been single as long as i’ve known him (3 years), we have amazing sex and he easily gets upset if i cannot come to see him. 6 ways you can tellby john ortvedjanuary 21, 2011 11:30 amso guys like you. and if it’s the former, how will that work living in two separate countries? late june after he found out i was returning he started to ask “did i love him” that conversationwent on then all summer he was saying how much he missed me and stuff. reason we haven’t had the talk is that i am a little shy towards him. he told me that he didn’t know if he could give me much at the moment because he just got a new job in a different state and is graduating so he is freaking out about life. occasionally though he would initiate physical contact with me like touch my arm or back and displayed all the signs of liking me. was looking for signs to tell if this guy likes me and i came across your list, i really like it and think its accurate but my current situation doesnt fall under most of the signs which left me confused. i think he jerked off since he was gone for like 10 minutes. our relationship is so strange i really dont get it…he told me the other day basically that whenever we are out together i am welcome to stay there whether we hookup or not, ik now that hes not seeing anybody else, he told me the other day that i “so great things for him he will never deny that and greatly appreciates them”, we hangout, hookup, im so attracted to him and hes very attracted to me, we get along great most of the time but i know he does get mad bc on a few occasions i have been drunk and gotten mad at him over frustration with this situation…we have been through so much together in not a lot of time, but it makes me feel bad because i care about him so much and understandably have a huge emotional attachment to him, i do believe he does care about me but i feel like he is still nowhere close to being able to commit to a serious relationship. we gave it a chance and it became a few failed attempts on his part. i’d encourage you to ask that sooner rather than later, because his being eager to meet up again for sex says nothing about having feelings. seems to be quite some deranged behavior of others in his hinterland that perturbs me. haven’t been single in forever and so of course i start to like him. he is genuinly concerned about my feelings and makes sure i am comfortable. it has turned into something more passionate and intimate where he actually cares for my wants/needs. psychic site and its owners are not liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, consequential, or punitive damages arising from using this site, the psychic contractors listed on it, or its content. is a strange story – basically i would say that he has not done anything to indicate that he would be a good boyfriend, or be good in a relationship.“im concerned bc it seems like now we never go on dates, just hang out on campus or in his room at night. i was alarmed (i had no intention of falling for him, both of us had just gotten out of horrible relationships and, as far as i had thought, both of us were looking for an optimal friends-with-benefits situation to supplement our intense university lifestyle) and i so insisted that we have the “talk” when i return. some of my colleagues have told me that he never used to visit the area or stop for coffee and a chat and on the days i missed work, he didn’t even show up. things ended like that and didn’t talk to him anymore. he lived with 4 other guys and one night he got super drunk downtown and called me at like 2am for a ride.  saying you’re not dtf is ok, that’s good boundary-setting, but if you’ve known him for a month you should know whether you want to kiss him or not. he gave me a rather vague and useless answer which i cant even remember. men can’t take advantage of your good nature if you demonstrate self-respect by refusing to stick around when someone treats you poorly. think i’m falling for him…how do i turn what we have into an ltr…. he normally doesn’t like to go out for dinner or anywhere. all the other guys between now and then are not going to work out.. :'( according to a friend of his, he went drinking on that day and was upset. for whatever reason, it didn’t work out, and you need to move on too. for the record, cheek kisses, nose rubs, stroking of hair, spooning, watching you sleep, all of that? when it didnt work out he told me he’d like to “hang out” again, when the next weekend comes around. took me to a hotel bar where a band as playing, he wanted to hear me sing (i sing for jazz band on the side) and he even took a video. he even declared he hadnt felt emotions for someone like this in several years. it took me a lot of time to let go of it… i dont want any drama and would like to keep it simple and sweet- im def not going to even kiss him right away because there was so much pressure from moving fast the first time and i got hurt. why i feel like he’s into me:-he always lights up and smiles when he sees me come in at work. my gut has been right well over 95% of the time in my life, and i just can’t help but get the feeling this thing was over before it even started. fast fwd a week—he was out of town visiting fam, and i was out with his roommate andh is roommate sent him a texting joking around that i said i missed him—he ends up asking for my number, and we text the entire night…he says the nicest things to me like “waking up next to you was undoubtably amazing” and “when you have a girl as gorgeous as you its pretty easy to want them to stay” (talking about me leaving the next day after my bday when i spent the night there)…. we started off as fwb but his gut obviously deceived him. he came and spent 2 weeks here which we travel together and he stayed in my place and we had a great lovely time together. does most of the signs in here, gives me nicknames, can spend time with me without having sex with me and when we do have sex he does focus on me and texts me practically everyday even when he is on a lads only holiday. i want him to show me that he likes me more than just some girl who comes over and now probably has sex. we ended up just hanging out like the first time and it felt the same. he wasn’t able to stay all night this time but he stayed for a while and we talked and he stroked my back. i told him and he was extremely supportive and wanted to talk about things a lot in person on the phone, or one night i was out to dinner with friends and didnt feel good and i called him to come get me and he dropped what he was doing to come pick me up and i stayed the night there…or he would ask how i was feeling and would rub my back when i didnt feel good…he was really there for me. to the new sheknows community,Where you can share your stories, ideas., so thats the story so far, so the things that are really bothering me are:1. a part of me feels he’s genuinely interested but doesn’t want anything too serious right now just got out of a year long relationship late in the summer) which is why he’s not pushing to have sex with me. if he still wants to come around, and you think you want something more than casual sex, i’d try and schedule time to hang out without sex. what is confusing me is the fact that his friends always tease him about his past girlfriends whenever i walk into the house, or tease him that he hooked up with another girl. i wouldn’t say “i love you,” but you could let him know that you’re falling for him in just those words. after that we’d kiss and cuddle after work and we’d text and call each other but being 4 years younger i was way too scared to even find out if he was interested in more. we did kiss and there was definitely a mutual attraction there.@scifibabysorry i didn’t see your comment earlier – is your question still relevant? i know sporadically through the years he has asked me things like “would i relocate/leave my area? i don’t do this as a rule, and i don’t want to be told i messed up royally now because again, this guy is exactly my physical type in every way, and i thought we were connecting mentally and emotionally too…. i had planned to keep it totally casual and fun, and just get to know him more. is never a way to get a man to fall for you. i know that’s what i went into this looking for, but i actually really like this guy. then came my birthday and she ended up staying after the small party i threw and we had sex.) we also have some sort of communication/contact every day….

Quiz: Does Your Hookup Want To Be Your Boyfriend?

17 Sordid Signs You're Just a Hookup and Nothing More

come thursday she texted me that she wasn’t up for going out. he stays away from discussing feelings and such – this was evident during the ‘discussion’ we attempted to have. tell him that you think he could be a very important person in your life, and that you are willing to give him time. nation, those weeklong-visits-across-national-borders work out like this: he researches and suggests me some possible dates, asks me to think about it and offers to pay for it himself. but i don’t know if it’s just wishful thinking on my part. it used to just be sex but look at the past 6 months to a year the sex has changed. don’t focus on the sex, focus on the friendship or attachment. love to yield to a man, but i am now so much more discriminating to whom i would yield. it hurt me but at the same time, i just understood cause he was there by himself and probably felt lonely. when he left on friday he knew i would be away all this week and asked me if i was able to be online and talk to him when i’m gone. i showed hesitency just because the situation to me is weird but whatever. my friends told me that i blew it and that was the only chance i was going to get because either he thought i responded that way because i wasn’t interested in him or because he is afraid of getting hurt. he texted the next day, called within two days and asked to meet again, we have been going out every weekend and all dates felt exactly the same.’s a bit of a loner, and does not enjoy going out much, so much of our time is spent @his place dancing, listening to music, and having profound deep conversations, and yes followed by passionate sex (with an equally profound level of intimacy). he left town, we havent seen each other for three weeks but he sends me almost every night a text message. i knew that if it continued i’d develop feelings and he said that was okay because feelings always get involved especially since we’ve known each other so long. i think i could relax into it if i knew for sure that he likes me so with all of my peculiarities and wants to be my man. couldn’t explain it but just something about him somehow got me attracted to him. i first met him i asked him what he was looking for, he said: “im looking for a potential relationship but i want to start as friends first to make sure we get along”. then… we ended up leaning on his car, then… we were in the car and the inevitable happened. however, i started to feel really hurt not seeing us together. this emotional stuff about them needing to be loved and spooned and all that is just not cool and it hurts. over the past year, he has indicated interest in hanging out, just the two of us, and i have always brushed it off with a joke or something. he has told me that he isn’t ready for a relationship. i mean he invited me to meet his friends, have dinner, invite me to work on a project together (which we spent nearly the entire day together) (and did not introduce me as his friend when meeting his friends) and wanted to/met my friends so i dont quite understand. we ended up hooking up for ages and stopping to chat for a second or do something silly. told you up front that he is not looking for a girlfriend. the night i broke up with my ex (which had nothing to do with the friend i swear! i guess you’re right and he obviously didn’t or doesn’t give a damn about me. some say he’s not “good-looking enough to be”, but he is charming and i find him adorable. through it all though my feelings haven’t changed because we do have a good friendship. caring enough to write something like this speaks volumes for my interest. i am not one who believes there are many “mixed signals” between the genders. i took this that he was testing me to see if i’d respond or if i gave up on him. so, about that time as the gods would have it… i got a call from a really good guy that i have known for the better part of a decade and we had drinks (no hookup! i feel really good about this conversation:) while i read the last paragraph of your article regularly, especially the “reliable and consistent attention” bit, not to chill out too much:) i’ll meet one of his best friends this week, might invite him as well, and next time i see him i will keep an extra eye on the above signs:) lets see what happens…. also thank you so much for taking the time to write back. i don’t know how to act or react to him. i’m going bonkers and getting anxious and i keep telling myself to just sit on my hands and wait.: haha night 🙂the next night he texted me asking if u wanted to hang out, i went and hung out with him and his roommates at 8:30 (his roommates are really nice and cool) and then the two of us hung out by ourselves in his room 10 till 12, talking at first, watching a movie, and then the night ended with us making out for the first time.  it still feels like some kinda test as i said before in my preivous posts.@claireif he has said he doesn’t see any point in meeting, that there is nothing to talk about, then anything you try to do or say will just annoy him. me and this guy were talking, hoping we could be more while getting to know eachother, i really liked him, i felt i more then liked him. he has severe problems expressing his emotions about his “feelings” for me whatever they may be…he gives me glimpses of his caring side and i truly adore and enjoy spending time with him but i’m very confused. the minute he does anything rejecting or hurtful, you should walk away. and my friend from work always watches his mannerism when i’m around other guys. theres this guy i met who lives on my floor at school, and he is in a few of my classes. i know i am worthy of something better as i tend to put the guys needs first before mine and i tend to fall in love easily with them…after a string of really unsuccessful moral crushing internet dating where all the men were commitment-phobe sex fiends, someone crossed my path in my real life. i mean it was like love at first site with me but i’m really not the type thats comfortable around boys especially if i like them.” you need to know that, because every day you spend gets you more invested. he contacted me everyday until we finally hung out and it was like we’ve known eachother for years. i realized then that i don’t want to be that girl who gives years to a guy who decides late that she isn’t the right girl for him and leaves her and finds someone else. i’m still unsure about this tho and it makes me do uncomfortable especially during school/between class. the beginning it was kinda on and off, i stop talking to him for 3 weeks, i ignored his text messages until he called me and ask me for a second chance that he really miss me and wants to be with me so since that time its been steady. then i went on tour for a month and we broke up a week after i got back. often make the mistake of thinking that because the sex feels intimate, is followed by texting, and repeated efforts to see you again, that the man wants a relationship. kick him to the curb and look for a guy who will feel lucky to have you. he forgave her and they tried it again but she wanted to keep seeing the other guy, so they broke up. to me makes as much sense like saying: "gee, i really like strawberries, so lets not eat them for another 6 months. i kept asking myself the same- i don’t know if i hurt/confused his feelings or he was a player who got impatient. even after that convo, we were infatuated so quickly and so much that we met up, he took it back and apologized (this was after a couple days and a couple drinks) cause he couldnt deal with how much he liked me. he told me one day to tell him how i feel so i told him and his response was: “just because i enjoy my freedom doesn’t mean i don’t want someone in my life. have no idea if he’s in it only for the sex, but he’s clearly making that a priority. he ended up cooking my fajitas and made me a homemade cake which he pointed out he had never done before for anyone. when i was at his house a few nights ago, i asked him what we were, and his response was, “i haven’t really thought about it. once shared with me that he feels i'm quite a good match for me (because just before he discovered that i like to do some outdoor excursion that he enjoys very much too but has never found a woman who shared that passion) … but also that it feels so intense for him being with me that he tries to slow it by not seeing me. of course it is in his interest for you to wait around without demanding too much. chemistry between us is amazing, sex is explosive, all the things you mentioned above is present. let girlfriends leave extra panties, a razor, cell phone charger and nonfat milk (at the very least) for frequent overnight visits. that’s my fear because i don’t want to be the girl before the girl the guy marries. guys are in different cities right now for the break yes? but he still texted me or called me every day, and his friends talk to me and make an effort to get to know me and always ask me to hang out but this guy says he’s not uncomfortable with that or avoids the subject so i dont hang with his friends. we talked more and got nowhere other than me being stupid and sticking it out still. i texted him this morning just saying hello and asking how is he doing. if you’re not down for fwb, you need to let him know that. we must of seen eachother everyday for 2 weeks before initiating in sexual intercourse. how convenient that it matches mine 🙂 he knows more than i do about how guys operate – you’re lucky to have gotten feedback from him, so take it. here is my question,Recently i met an old friend and the second night i was in his place we had sex.?U have a point about him not being around for a whole year. forward to this past summer and he randomly texts me to say he misses me and remembers hoe awesome our first night was together. i hadn’t been able to feel for anyone since my ex. from there you will either be very reassured, or learn that the relationship is not what you hoped., my name is karen and i’m from misissipi and i just wanted to tell you i absolutely love your hookinkupsmart webstie! cannot peg this situation… the smarter part of me feels that i should end this now before future hurt, but the unwise part wants to continue, because this feeling i get with him is like a high i cannot control.” and i responded stupidly because i guess i didn’t understand what he was saying so i responded with the city that i met up with him and he said the city and connected it with a country that had the same city that we were in. so we wrote back and forth and finally decided to hang out again. it sounds like you have a poor track record of faithfulness in relationships, so he would be foolish to count on you for anything serious. however, it’s impossible to know without asking him directly. the fact that he treated you poorly and kept his difference after you had sex tells you everything you need to know. some men will go through all the motions of a relationship because it’s enjoyable, but then state that there is no formal commitment. i don’t think he was saying that just to get me away. because so many relationships do start with hooking up first (although only 12% of sexual hookups ever progress to a relationship), a guy can hook up, have real feelings, and then worry about showing them too early. know i have exhaustively explained my situation as best as i can – what i really need is to know his possible angle, if there are any major clues i am missing out on, and more importantly how to approach this situation. does he show real interest in who you are or does he just make small talk, or talk about himself, until it's time to get touchy? he asked me to stay over and we cuddled the rest of the night and even into the morning. but why do i feel im falling into the fbf catergory? two days after we broke up, boy a chats me up inquiring about my recent single status and makes plans to hang out with me the next day. (for being booty buddies… the booty is starting to lack. i brought up the “talk” again and this time he went on the defensive, and that night he basically said “though im over my ex, its hard for me to move on to a new relationship right now and im not sure what i want just yet. i will be divorced in november, 2010 from a man i married 6 years ago, and have been in relationship for a total of 10 years.“should i just be patient and wait for him to contact me? thank you for your help 🙂oh and i forgot to say, concerning the ‘hooking up’, it wasn’t just a physical thing. he made an effort to show me around his city. i dont want to lose his friendship but id love to be more than just a friend with benefits.“then on thanksgiving, he didnt call me but texted me that night saying “hey sorry i didnt call u, im not feeling well, will try to call u tomorrow but i cant make any promises” and he didnt call. he's so genuine when we're together and i love it, idk what to do about it all. we usually run into eacth other on hallways and in the cafeteria and he comes to my office for coffe and mate (a national drink here) and the like. we only knew each other by computer and phone/texting for a week before we did this! if he does make a move, be careful that he isn’t just going for a one-time thing. we spent a couple nights cuddling after hanging out with friends at his house.” when we got to his place we had sex of course. both live apart (about six hours away by car) and i had to leave the next day…that was almost three weeks ago…. we found out we have a lot of things in common. he has told me that he finds both my physical appearance and personality attractive and we always have a great time together, laughing., last april i had sex with this guy (it was both of our first times), and since i’d been hurt a lot in the past i at first tried to make it a one night stand, but he was really sweet so i suggested “fuckbuddies. i still have feelings for him so i feel/act a little weird when he is around. these are all clear signs that this hookup doesn't want to invest financially or emotionally in this relationship. i just really don’t want to get into that discussion with him because i don’t know the answer. also as he works for me we are together all day (it is only a two person office). we’ve been through a lot from rumors he unintentionally spread, pictures he allowed to be posted on the net, and just heartbreak and a lot of game playing. like i said before he places a premium on looks, particularly in his relationships (i am the first non-relationship that he has had) all his ex girlfriends were tall, goregous, blonde, blue eyed, classically beautiful. well, i’ve been seeing this guy for about 6 weeks, and i’m getting mixed signals (probably giving them too! i actually managed to get over the whole thing and only want to be his friend now but i really just don’t know what he’s trying to do here. so we made it clear that we a relationship would be pointless. he starts saying “if it makes you happy you should” like for fuck’s sake.. but hes so hot and cold i dont know what to do… also when i see him again in a few months we plan on doing the usual hooking up. i usually hook up with guys consistently for a month or two, but i never get to know them on a personal level. he got jealous mad and told me he wanted to beat the guy up (just figurately, of course! what’s not ok is to misandrate him or blame him for your emotions, because that only says that he doesn’t deserve his own wants and needs, he should just serve yours. we have been seeing each other for the month and he hasnt really said anything about being bf/gf and my friends keep asking me about it. i just want to figure out what his angle is.. gives you their sweatshirt and does everything they can just to make you feel better and more comfortable. we flirted with eachother and sorta got friendly with one another.” if that is the case, you need to get out now before he gets more emotionally invested. as much as these words make me cringe it’s turned into making love. this is only available for credit card clients through the auto and manual credit card service.. he told me held feelings for me since the first year of college. normal everyday conversation consists of me sharing while he says nothing. on the other hand, i don’t like it that he is pressuring you to lose weight. i told him if it counted or anything i had spent all day thinking of ways to bond with his daughter and he told me that that meant alot. like there’s no one in the room but me, and after the party is over we usually, shamefully i’ll say it, end up sleeping together. he tried to make plans for when to meet again and he’s been quite active on the phone later and asked me to prolong my stay in town to meet again. he brought all the food and even brought me flowers. he offered to make me breakfast but i declined and left early in the morning. a few years ago i met a guy at work and in a short space of time we became quite close in a chatty and conversational way. haven’t been to his apartment and he hasn’t been to mine either, we always met at a mall and go from there. when we went to sleep he spooned me and was holding one of my hands. don’t know if this story is still live, but if you do like this guy and want to salvage it, i’d say you have a bit of an apology to give him.. you need to get out of this before you hurt further and resent him more. he was cute and dorky, but i am too and there is so many things that we have in common. recently, we have been spending quite a lot of time together, at least 3-4 times a week. so i did and he ended up coming over the next night and we watched a movie and ended up hooking up.. it's odd that his friends tease him about hooking up with girls and he denies it. he claims he hasn’t felt emotions for someone since his marriage, and that relationships generally do not work well with him since women he’s dated in the past can’t seem to understand/accept that work is his #1 priority and relationships fall below on the priority list. about a week later he takes advantage of my offer. before i knew it, we were the only 2 left because everyone had gone other places.  on the other hand, he may just be genuinely busy, and will actually text me when he has time. meant not sure if he's falling for me* haha i wish i was sure that he was. he’s introduced me to his buddies at work (all high ranking in the military), talked about me to his roomate/friend that’s deployed. as i said he’s still texting but he seems almost to be hiding behind those texts where as before he was calling me and i him. he considers us friends, nothing more, nothing less and that he wanted us on the same page. just be careful about who else he may be pursuing at the same time. thats what we originally signed up for so he has known that all alone. i feel confused because he does (planning to spend extended periods of time with me outside of work) and says things that seem to contradict his “fun only” statement. i told him i was fine with taking things slow and keeping things causal at first and seeing where it went from there but now it seems like it is more, he is spending hours talking to me about my life and things in my past, telling me about his life and him growing up his past sexual relationships and his “first time” i have spoken to him about mine. i appreciate the effort he is taking to carve himself a niche in my life. we are both rather proud types with a bit of a problem reaching out. partial blame here goes to romcoms and other cultural tropes where a guy “wears down” a semi-unwilling woman with a nice guy beta-bonding script. i broke up with my bf 3 weeks ago n this guy and i hung out and had a great time and slept together again. he spent a few nights at my place (no sex, just spooning in bed until we fell asleep). yet, when he meet up at each others house to hook up he cuddles me constantly, tells me things like how his never been so comfortable with any one like this, strokes my hair, hugs me close when we fall asleep together and he doesnt hook up with any one else but me. for inconveniencing the other person by withdrawing access to easy sex. lets comments slip, and it goes a little like this: me: “hey remember that movie avatar we went to and loved?. stick around, find some great activities you can do together like watching a movie or just sit and talk about anything under the sun. a horrible breakup with my boyfriend, i met a guy at a party a few weeks afterwards..whenever we hang out he tells me how much he likes me.) some of the things he did raised a red flad and i didn’t want to deal with it any longer so i actually told him that if we weren’t going to have a relationship, i wanted us to stop being intimate. fast forward 3 years later and i heard that he has settled down with a new girlfriend and about a month ago i get a message from his sister who now works where i do and she said ‘by the way my brother says hello to you! of course, everyone seemed to think that i was going to be with this friend, sexually, but that wasn’t my intent and i made that clear as well., well similar situations to all really, been seeing this guy for a couple of months, we nearly always have sex. i just can’t decide whether in his head he regards me as a seriously potential mate, minus the marriage and kids, neither one of us see these variables in our future. the end of january, he became very pushy and questioned me whether i liked him at all or wanted to date him. on the otherhand i can’t decide if i should bring it up to him how i feel about him or just wait for him to come to me. he could have just done that so he didn’t seem like an ass in front of me. i agreed… he then once again said don’t let him get away he’s a great catch and worth the wait. hugs and kisses and slowly getting a feel for each other. what this means for you is that the demand comes first (which hasn’t happened with your man), then he goes looking for the supply. i had to leave early june before the semester was over not expecting anything to come from me and guy a. about a week later i find out that my fathers best friends son is also newly single (2 months) after an on and off 7 year relationship. every girl at my school was totally head over heals for him and i was too. i don’t know what i should do, or how i should feel. you can’t afford to keep doing what you are doing and hope for the best. you’ll actually feel better just for taking the risk. but that doesn't work so well for you – maybe he'll come around later, but for now i would definitely let it go. out if you are just hooking up or is love lurking at the corner is important to give you clarity once and for all. get 100s more tips in our single girl's guide to dating >>. often he would say things like “you like me, or you miss me. i meant was i wouldn’t take this as a sign he was or wasn’t serious. clearly you need to know the whole story, and you’re in the unfortunate position of having to ask him for more details, which feels like pressuring him, or waiting and wondering until he makes another move. even when he’s asked don’t i trust him ive just gone quiet. i have feelings for him, but i’m having a hard time reading him and i think it’s too early to drop the bomb on him, so to speak, and tell him how i feel. (if you felt uncomfortable kissing him, i’d question how much you actually do like him. he left the next day to travel for a graduation present his parents gave him so didn’t hear from him for a couple weeks.’t waste the pretty on a guy who is looking for strictly casual. all started about a month ago we exchanged information and i eventually called him. since then, i look great, i work out everyday, i watch what i eat, i have learned to protect myself agains the mental and psychological abuses of my husband and in november we will be divorce.’d take this as good news as it’s very beta; a roissy-esque player wouldn’t apologize for not calling. i’m a very selective person and i am aware of who i like/who i don’t and am picky because i don’t want just anyone! before we went on break he invited me to come stay the break with him but i couldn’t. however, being a female, it is almost impossible to have sex without feeling something and getting attached in one way or another. i’m curious whether he truly is into me, or uses work as a reason to hold back from the relationship. your own behavior strikes me as irresponsible and shady as well – have you thought about the effect of all of this on the daughter? the things that make me feel as though he is indeed falling for me are more like him going out of his way to come see me at a wake to make sure i’m ok… granted he lives a few blocks away from where the funeral home was but he came by and called me and said ” i’m outside, would you like to take a break and a cigarette with me? meanwhile, i urge you to keep meeting new people, dating, etc. me and this guy have talking for a few weeks. one week we'll be at a party and he'll show interest in me, talk to me a lot, have his arm around me infront of everyone, ask me to stay over. i understood and we hooked up but at the same time it didn’t feel like just a hook up. i know he was gone for awhile and trying to get everything straight now but it doesn’t look like he’s working or going to school, not really sure. he has told me about his past and he is defiantly experienced… lets just put it that way. i really do like this guy, we have gotten to know each other over the past few weeks, but i need some advice on what to do next. after hanging out for a bit my friends decided to leave, since they thought we wanted to be alone. you've been "seeing" this guy for awhile, and your friends are beginning to ask what the deal is -- and it occurs to you that you really don't know. he was there for me when th eguy i was seeing cheated and drove to my uni to see me and just talk all night. i’ve been worried that i’m just a rebound but i’m not sure… this is why. went to see him with the strength to not hook up with him and i fell week and we did.

He's Just Not That Into You — or Is He? The Quiz – Dating

i didn’t think he would last with her anyway so i wasn’t really worried but i guess i just didn’t bring it up to him or i just blocked it out. i realized later that day that he was asking “what are we? we’ve actually been pretty good friends, go to the same university, live in the same apartment complex, and go to the same church.. should i feel guilty for hooking up last night, i have never talked about exclusiveness with this girl, but do i owe her an explanation/ should i tell her?  this is the first time in 2 1/2months that he has not contacted me, no evening text or call and no morning text. i have been dating this guy for almost five months.” [he said he places a premium on looks, which was his basic criteria for all his previous relationships, but in my case hes attracted to my entire personality] there was one occasion where i was really angry about having to walk a few kilometers in the freezing cold and bitching about it so he called me a cab and arranged for it to drive us home. there is no reason in the world to be monogamous with a fwb. and he gave me that heavy flirting, that interest, and now, more formal. is there any possibility this could be more, or am i just naive? he said it’s ok, so i would take him at his word. in fact, most friends will go to great lengths to convince girls that their buddy is a really good guy, not a manwhore at all, and really likes her, etc. prior to that we were talking about the local bar at school. i know that he knows the power he has over me because he’ll stop communicating with me for a period of time and then when i finally feel like im moving on he’ll pop up with this i want u to be close again and i see me marrying you in the future i just want you to fall on your head a few times. we again were at the bar a few weekends later and he came up to me and hugged me and asked me to dance, afterwards he held my hand and told me he wanted me to meet some of his friends, that night we didn’t do anything either. careful with this sort of projection where you start putting words in people’s mouths by judging them by your own standards. he seemed then, and every other time we hung out, was that he truly wanted to get to know me. in the beginning we both agreed we didn’t want a relationship, that we would just stay friends. and #10 on your list…let’s just say he makes that a top priority when we get together…. i recently got out of a horrible relationship so i am not ready for anything serious. i had a conference to go to and during the entire weekend of my conference we were texting back and forth, and he hinted essentially that he was worried i might catch the eye of another guy during my conference, and that he cared about me beyond a hookup level. i eventully dumped my bf and told him that asked if he still want be with me had suppose be meeting him that weekend as i had told him that planned to end it with bf which i did but then he said he was busy and said he had went to ireland on wesday was gonna be back on monday away as needed a break suppsely family problems was getting to him but did not tell me what so i left few msgs then did not heard much back until friday night had asked if i wanted meet him the next day near where i live and if wanted to be with him then that was fine so i said i did and went meet him went for a walk hold my hand and had kiss but ended up went back to his house spent weekend there sat watch tv offered to buy me food for dinner but did not know what wanted so got an takeaway things seemed fine watched tv ended up in bed still kissed and hugged me but mostly i had do it first said i should go home on fri night late on as i had not told my mum about us know i was seeing someone but thought it was an friendship i did not like the idea and i felt like he was trying get rid of me so then on saturday i was in bad mood asked me what was up said nothing then kept asking said i had wanted to stay said it made sense to go home and tell mum and that he would try see me next weekend so we went for a walk and then i was suppose to go home but could see i was still mad so end up he said i could stay though was like i don’t know if got enough food for us both(was near a shopping centre and i know he had some food in it) but he said ok can stay and went and got some food though he seemed abit less affectionate but still was some affection but he kept txting said was woman friends but it was annoying as was most of night until later on he turned off phone went to bed hugged into him watched tv went to sleep odd kiss hug etc so then on sunday i was still abit mad as did not say anything about the txts though could see i was mad kept asking what was wrong said nothing eventully gave up and did not kiss or hug me until i kissed him so went out for a walk then pretty eary he said i should go home coz of buses and such gave me an hug and kisses before i got on train said see me later though still don’t txt me unless i txt him speak mostly on msn i have asked him if he thinks moved to fast or what he thinks about me says that ive to stop worrying we don’t really talk about much but when together he will make jokes and tease me very touchy feely in public but never really said he liked me or said i look good or such asks odd time how iam, what been up to though since sunday not been on msn much as he says he has family thing to sort out and could take all week txt him a few times txted bk but never txts me first or never has called me sorry for long msg but basically do you think this guy is interested in me or just after sex ? susan,i met a guy at a party a few weeks ago, and recently we’ve been chatting online. is where i’m confused…am i just a booty call? if he doesn’t agree or tells you that he is unready/unsure if he wants to be in a relationship, you might just have to let it go. are you interested in a relationship or wanting to keep it casual?, it sounds like the two of you are close, and there's a lot of good stuff happening between you, but you're not sure where you stand. i really wanted to and i guess i couldn’t be tough about it anymore! i cannot tell you how many women have written to me giving those behaviors as examples of encouragement, only to have the guy say he doesn’t want a relationship. this conversation went late into the night, until he finally asked if it would be absurd to come over. to further complicate the matter my ex just moved in with him. he is not interested in just sleeping with me but rather he sees me as more than friends. except this time i put my hands down his shorts. am perfectly happy to be slow, but that sense of standstill at times (or is it still stand? the reason for me to choose someone far away from here is because i know that casual relationships are not for everyone, so if things can go wrong,then it`ll be easier for me to get out of it and be free knowing that he wont be close by to remind me of my mistakes. recently found and started talking to my first love after not seeing or talking to him for 20 yrs we have been communicating via text and phone calls for over a month, he lives about 2-3 hours away from me.’s always asking me about my life or stories from my past. Take this quiz to find out if your gut's telling you the truth! after meeting up with him a few more times and his display of “affectionate bf” behavior, i asked him how he feels about all of this, mentioning also my feelings. about 6 months ago i started talking with a guy at work who’s 1 year older than me. but he really, really does not seem to have any faith in relationships right now…understandable since the last girl is still so fresh in his mind and was such a horrible person. but all that time he was more than obviously staring at me in a way that suggested he found me attractive. but he knows and has known that i have way mmore feleings for him! he could change his mind tomorrow, or find a new woman, and you would be hurt. we met in person after two weeks of exchanging messages. i don't have anymore my center of gravity wrapped around the action or non-action of a man, but still, can't get a clear sense of this one here. and i really really really need some answers and advice, because i can’t seem to take my own or even listen to myself at all.:class, work the usual fun things, where have u been? he flirted with me and gave me his card for work purposes but as i was leaving reminded me that i had his number now in case i ever wanted to game (a discovered common interest). to be honest, holding your hands seems more like domination than devotion. and since am new to this kind of relatioship,i thought it was a good thing to start from here and have fun with someone i wont have to run into on the streets or something like that,so……we`ve been chating everyday and having our online satisfaction but since we had our first real encounter,things have changed. so much, because at 11 years my junior and 75lb over weight i looked and felt horrible. so about a month and a half ago i met this kid at work who is honestly my perfect match. he was living at home so i wasn’t able to see him until he told me he was going to be in town and wanted to see me so we set a date and made plans to see eachother. saw him a few days after that and we hooked up again. we hooked up physically fairly early on; earlier than i’m used to. he started to show some real affection and then one night we went out and came back home really drunk and ended up having a 3 some with his roommate like he proposed. mean, i spend alot of time with this guy, but now he's not even kissing me anymore. we normally stay at my house, but we sometimes go out to have dinner.:oh im sorry didnt know u were on crutches :/ if i had seen u i would have offered some help. seems to try to break away from me every 4 weeks, but keeps coming back. after that one serious conversation, the good signs he’s shown, and the short time we’ve been dating (7 weeks) i do not want to ask any more because it would feel pushy and i just want to let things flow and feel natural, but i get confused with some other signals and do not want to drive myself into falling hard for somebody who is not available… i’d appreciate your comments! he plans for us both three months ahead, cooks for me all the time, tells me things he never told to anyone before, is eager to cover all the bills up and prioritizes me in bed always, suggested to meet my child. so from the day i started to about the end of february of the following year, we didn’t really talk outside of work. and from what i’ve seen, guys usually are not the ones to bring this up – it’s pretty well understood that women generally want a commitment, and the guy decides. before we slept together i told him i wasn’t a slut and he said he wasn’t either, but if it feels right, let’s try and see. he may or may not be telling the truth but i feel it doesn’t correlate with how we were all these years. how do i take things slow and get to know a guy before jumping into a relationship, or just simply jumping them? valentine's day gift basket ideas for every person in your life. we cook together, take walks, go to parties together, etc. if you were the one to break the engagement, this is truly cruel on your part. i met this guy i work with about 6 months ago. by the end of february, we somehow ended up leaving a bar together and hooking up. after two weeks i went to him and again we had a great time together. of these deep chats sound like they’ve included a lot of hypotheticals, rather than straight talk where either or both of you take responsibility for your feelings. was hard for me to read considering the guy i've been pining over falls under the majority of those signs, but i still feel slightly played. he asked what made him so different and i explained… he responded with “i like to have a connection as friends before sex comes into play… so that if anything more does or does not happen at least we have that base of friendship” he texted me the next day as if everything was normal…i am honestly so confused. my problem is he seems to be giving me mixed signals, because we have such a clear communication on what is best for our situatuation, but he is acting and treating me differently than just a hook up. of our mutual friends is a guy i’ve known for years. well, after we spent a few hours that passed very quickly – we went to leave, and we kissed, which he initiated. i have mixed feelings myself, but i want something more than casual- i would like to be exclusive, hang out more, and get to know hm better. so i just replied thanking him for responding and and that i’m not the type to chase or be pushy and all about letting things flow. but as soon as we came back, he texted me and asked me to go star-gazing. the point is, we spend so much time together, he shows me he cares in numerous ways, wants to take me out, on trips, do everythign with me, his friends and mother know of me and he alwys tries to make me happy. then other weeks it'll seem like nothing's happened between us and i'm just another kid at the party. my heart dropped and i guess i realized then that we probably wouldn’t be getting in a relationship because i figured it would be impossible to do when separated like that. after 2 months, i tried to define the relationship bc i felt it was at that point and i think me having that talk made him feel pressured and he even told me at one point that it wasnt that he didnt like me but that he felt i was further ahead in the relationship progression than him…so after a few months i was very frustrated with him for not wanting to commit bc i didnt understand why and he was frustrated bc he felt like i was pressuring him…so finally i said it would be easier for us to be friends and he told me “i guess we’ll have to try it that way”…so for a month we stopped talking as much or hanging out really…we would still talk and text at least al few times a week but it felt weird. i’ve typed too much already, but just to add… he really is so good to me. for inconveniencing the other person by withdrawing access to easy sex. my friends told me to let it go and/or just follow my heart but not to listen to anyone, just myself. he came over and we watched a movie and had sex that same night, which ended up being great., i have been hanging out with this guy for about a month now. this guy’s behavior isn’t unusual for a college guy, but it’s not the behavior of a guy who’s officially dating either. i waited a couple days she didn’t text, so i texted her asking how she was doing and by the end of the convo we determined that after her midterm on thursday we would go out and have fun. he called and told me to meet back at his house for my birthday dinner.  am i that daft, have i been played or is there more to this than meets the eye. he would want to cuddle and get mad when i snuck out in the morning without saying goodbye. try to take it one week at a time, and enjoy the relationship for what it is. he has a pet name for me and seems to genuienely care about me…. this guy just wants the ego reinforcement of knowing you like him because he saw you as a challenge. or do i feel like i am falling for him because of the attention he is giving me now? everyone at work seems to think there’s something between us (or there should be something going on; since we really seem to be into each other). he either wants to be with you in a fully committed boyfriend/girlfriend relationship or you’re done. two to three hours isn’t that long a drive – you could have had a weekend visit before now.” and i realized that the conversation was relevant to us as well so i changed the topic. when we do fool around he is very attentive to my needs. like i said i feel like his actions are telling me different than his words. now, we’re talking even more often, like we’re up all night. either way, being in limbo is just a huge waste of time! terrasini, thanks for sharing your story, i'll do my best., you left a bolded sentence above regarding other indicators he has feelings, and i believe, though have yet to confirm, these are also indicators that a hookup is falling. wish i knew what he was feeling about what we did. more than that the truth is i’m overly analytical, like i’m the type to obsess over something and dissect it completely — like i literally cannot “go with the flow” — more than that i cant bring myself to ask him what is going on with him bc everytime the conversation moves that way he just avoids the question or manages to work around it. afternoon he contacted me to ask how my weekend has been, said we should definitely have dinner soon, also told me where he was with his friends and asked me what i was doing, and i said the weekend has been very busy (not a lie! we hooked up and then i kicked him out of my house after. he even brought up to me in front of his friends something like, “if we were living together, would you do this ______”. as a freshman, you’re already pulling girls so you will probably do well in the hookup scene. i started seeing him out a lot more and we would often just chat and we got along really well. i thought we both liked each other,but i feel like he doesnt care anymore. the word heaps seems not only to quantify his love for you, but also to qualify it., long story shorter… he has never stopped putting in effort to spend time with me. honestly, it’s impossible for to know what is going on in his mind, and it sounds like he doesn’t know how you’re feeling either. it still felt the same like before but what had changed is he doesn’t want me with anyone else. he still doesn’t talk to me as much as before (neither do i). his best friend invited me for his leaving dinner tomorrow, i won’t go as it wasn’t him that invited me and now i think i’m not the one for him, feeling quite unhappy and planning not to see him.-cuter approaches have no place with intricate and tender venues of ones heart or even lust. i asked him if i were to walk away, if he’d care. he’s never in my area so he should have just left me alone. you must ask him before you get any more invested, and be prepared to walk, because i don’t think the sex you’re having is at all casual for you.. having the strength of not needing to meddle, or pull on anyone's sleeves, trying to push the river. so now i realize that i have some feelings for him and i dont want it to just be sex, but i dont know if i should ask him how he feels straight out or what sort of signs i should look for…. then next day, he sent me a message saying he fell a sleep and “thank you for the lovely evening, night and morning, i had really nice time. we never even looked at each other in this type of way until after i was separated.“he asked me once if i am using him just for sex”. he even brought up to me in front of his friends something like, “if we were living together, would you do this ______”. he finally responded telling me he didn’t want to hold me back and that he really wasn’t making sure i wasn’t with anyone, that he was just asking (which i don’t believe because he got jealous angry when i brought up the last guy, which wasn’t even a big deal to me). long story short we had a conversation and he said something that i took the wrong way and pretty much thought he wasn’t interested in me at all. long story short, the marriage went downhill, and 3 years into the marrige and 75 added pounds on my 5′ 2 body a man 11 years my junior befriends me at work. the third time we were cuddling at his house we ended up sleeping together. so i didnt hear from him over the whole summer saw him a few times around the neighborhoods but that was it. , he was there too and we by chance we able to talk and he hugged me when he saw me and kept purposely running into me., i see there are 9 questions here i have not yet answered. think you could just say “listen, i’m not very good at having serious talks, but i find myself feeling confused about what we’re doing. i also think the guys at hus could be enormously helpful in giving you some guidelines about dealing with women. then, he’s texted me about twice a week with random things, asking my opinion on his hair or an outfit, or telling me he had work early like me, etc. we again hooked up but we still talked for hours still trying to ask me questions and figure me out. he asked if i missed him i said “no but my aims getting better” and he texted back “well i’ve missed you”. dream that he will fall for you is normal – that’s what women always feel. talked alot about relationships in general, things that make them go wrong, our own past realtionships and why they went wrong etc and i feel that he is somehow feeling me out, seeing what i think about relationships, men, sex, commitment, longterm relationship changes etc, its like an interview or initaition as to whether or not i am suitable for the 100m sprint or the marathon. i’d much rather call or hangout with a person than text them. guess the question is should i stay or should i go?  i would like to try and talk to him over the weekend to find out how he really feels but not sure how to do this or even if any of this means more than just fb. we havent been hooking up for long at all and im fine with the hooking up its fun for both of us. a comment got made about us dating and he laughed and said “we’re not dating”. unfortunately, we get along on so many levels, i just think he’s still thinking the grass is greener and may be interested in polygamy period. a month ago he asked me if i wanted to be “friends with benefits” i told him i didn’t want if it wasn’t going to mean anything more than that to him. she has never said anything about not wanting attachment, and if her friend hadn’t told me that i would think we were heading straight for a relationship. he is not “acting like we’re in a relationship. if you want to know the answer, you’re going to have to ask the question. so i have been reading all of your great advice and hope you can shed some light on the very confusing & complicated situation i’m in—i met this amazing guy about 5 months ago and we hit it off immediately (we met the night of my bday party his roommate who i am good friends w/ introduced us)." you definitely need to know if he's hooking up with others girls, especially if you are having sex. im loving and al this other stuff but for some reason when im singal this freind and i always hit it off. he always kisses and hugs me goodbye and often comes to my house straight from work. we actually know eachother 2 months and its in the past month that we’ve started spending so much time together. two days i didn’t hear from him and so began week 4. also, no woman lost interest in a guy for not initiating sex right away unless she was just looking for something casual. the first day i met him there, he kept staring at me in an infatuated way, which was weird i thought. so we went out on the balcony and he started kissing me, at which point i initiated a conversation that if he expected us to hook up he needed to contact me and hang out with me sober., i’d like some advice or at least feelings about this relationship or whatever it is i have…i met up with this guy in first year of college, this was about 6 years ago. he always holds my hand, hugs or kisses me in public or when alone and sends the occasional text message asking how is my day going. we both put a slight guard up b/c i guess he feels the way i do…he doesn’t want to fall if this goes nowhere. i tend to stick to drinking whenever i have insomnia and he sticks to smoking, which is why he suggested we do this so we could understand each other better. in july we went on trip abroad and it was really good., despite feminization of our society, men still understand marriage as a corporate enterprise, something that needs to be constantly pruned and recapitalized, one they are expected to head up, and an enterprise upon which they will be judged as men. but several other friends’ comments have made me wonder if we are actually meant to be together, due simply to the fact that we’ve carried on for so long. he has only been in a few relationships before me and he’s still a virgin. we started hanging out a lot this summer and he seemed as if he liked me.– you might have to figure out what you want first before asking him to do anything. he recently graduated from our college but plans to stick around for the upcoming semester looking for a job and what not.” i think you pretty much know where you stand, whether or not you want to. don’t you want a relationship with someone who makes your relationship a priority? we both go to the same university, are from the same state and hometown and have several mutual friends. if both of you were ready for a relationship, had sex early and went on to spend time together, as you have, a relationship is just as likely to succeed as if you had waited longer to have sex. i figured if he was upset, at least it showed that he cares still. do i wait it out and eventually embrace he’s just not that into me? perhaps he can let you know, even if he can’t commit right now, whether this is something that you should plan your career around, even temporarily. everything is good, he calls everyday, we see each other every week.) i don’t really understand what your question is – it sounds like you don’t want to make the decision for yourself. on the other hand, he may be falling for you and wanting more. the reason he had was a good one (major crisis between the ex and the teenager and he negotiating or whatnot; so the teen is back living with him). the common booty call, however, entails just the toothbrush -- required for pre-hookup breath freshening. on the other hand, if he likes you and is feeling a bit shy or awkward, then your talking to him gives him an opportunity to respond positively and make that clear.  so he misses me, we are exclusive, he texts me everyday (i never text first) and / or phones me…. or he has a fear of commitment/doesn’t want to get hurt? that way you don’t hurt his feelings, but take responsibility for it not being a good match. am concerned that you just went through a divorce, have said within the last month that you are not emotionally ready for a relationship, and now have fallen for him. felt like i had soo many questions and decided to send him an email basically telling him that what i wrote before wasn’t what i meant and what i meant was that i enjoyed our friendship before and i realize that i can’t do the in between because i can’t handle it and i have feelings. i just don’t feel like he fits the list at all. the other thing you can do is just let him set the pace, but if you like him, and you think the ex is a real factor, i wouldn’t recommend it..I have never believed hook ups would lead to something and have had longterm relationships for a long time, so i had never really had to come across with this situation until a short while ago. so the next night he invited me out for drinks with him and his broher which i also know and he was so affectionate and treated me with so much respect. first, let me just say that there is no way you can blow it with a woman by staying out late and letting her stay over. anyway, i haven’t really talked to him but my friends keep asking me about him because they all seem to think he cares about me, shocked we haven’t seen eachother yet, and that we were just in eachothers lives at the wrong time. susan 🙂 okay so i’ve met this guy recently and i took his virginity and he keeps saying ”how special it was to him and he’s glad he lost it to me” he said he also had butterflies when we spent the day together and mentioned how he wants to see me all the time” oh and he had to go home one night for some family occasion and he said ”i dont want to go. he held my hand the rest of the night and brought me back to his dorm again where we did everything but have sex, he didn’t even seem to be trying for it and was very sweet about everything and kissed me a lot. remember, a guy’s showing affection, cuddling, talking for hours, etc. i woke up angry about the night and still wearing my clothes so i was confused on why we had not had sex. we hooked up a couple more times and hung out. or if you’d like to start slow, just tell him how much you like him, or that you love dating him. i met this guy a couple of days ago at a club and we danced all night and then he came back to my flat with me and some friends and watched a movie.. my ex) he’ll tell me that he doesn’t want to know or he’ll playfully make fun of the guy. i was sure that we would go on to do larger things if you know what i mean. i didn't know what this meant for our "relationship," though. i have a friend whom i knew for a while. i just got dumped by my ex 3 weeks ago and the attention was nice. he dumped his gf and we started sleeping together again.,i am having a major issue right now that is completely stressing me out in a time that i don’t need stress. not a bad one, but like he’d just seen a steak, lol. so i met this guy 6 yrs ago in college, wasn’t really attracted to him and didn’t really say much to him at all and then one day it just hit me. if you act like something to be “tamed,” he will be bored once he tames you.“am i just fooling myself into believing something might still happen with this guy? i wouldn’t give it more than a few weeks, though – maybe a couple of months. it doesn’t sound like you have any residual feelings for your ex, and you seem to have ended the relationship, so i wouldn’t delay on that account. finally, i had to go and while he was walking me out, he turned and asked me “where are we? i like this guy and i just want to know if he likes me back.

Quiz: Are You More than a Friend?

you know you’re clingy, and he is asking for space, that’s fair, and would be better for you too. never defined our relationship, although he asked me once if i am using him just for sex and i said no. not asking you to glance into the crystal bowl, but perhaps some enlightening words on how to glean some sense from this behaviour? usually when he says good bye, he would give me a great hug and kiss on the forehead, but at the end of that night, it was an awkward hug.“but several other friends’ comments have made me wonder if we are actually meant to be together, due simply to the fact that we’ve carried on for so long.. awkwardly lingers for a little while longe rand eventually calls it a night and leave. but still i’m not sure if he is my boyfriend, or wants to be, or if we’re fwbs. him: i can’t tell how well his behavior correlates to his actions. 5 best sex positions for women and how they get the job done. his statement that he tries to slow down his feelings for you by not seeing you tells me that he does not want a committed relationship. i never told him that i fell for him because we were good friends for about a year. and he said we were exclusively seeing one another and only sleeping with one another)he wants to be introduced to my friends and hinted to me a few weeks ago “i think its really cool when a girl asks a guy out.” what’s not ok is to blame or rage at him for it, more on that later…. that break is now a break up because this new guy has caused me to loose all the feelings for the old guy. it used to just be sex but look at the past 6 months to a year the sex has changed. concerned bc it seems like now we never go on dates, just hang out on campus or in his room at night. he got jealous mad and told me he wanted to beat the guy up (just figurately, of course!. i mean we only kiss but still is he just using me as someone to kiss? we decided to meet up, he seemed pretty intent to have sex with me and i was horny so i agreed. i told him that i would not be able to go through with that bc of the feelings i have for him, but eventually i gave in bc of the feelings i have for him. we didn’t pass 1st base, i tried my best to respect her. the first night my friend came, he wanted me to bring him something he had left at my house as an excuse for a quickie. we still emailed for the remainder of the 7 months before i got a surprise message from him after 7 months of emailing that he was back home for the holidays to visit and he wanted to see me so we made plans to see eachother and he drove down with a friend to stay with his other friend and make sure to see me. american men often confuse the heck out of me, but i can't see myself taking intercontinental flights just so i have a lovely relationship with a suitable man. fact that he is sending them at all, however not as often (not “blowing up my phone” like he had before we slept together) is still a good sign, i think. i don't have any problem with that, just something to keep in mind. he texted me 2 days later and we have been texting ever since.– cuddles post-sex and stays the night as well as in the morning – leaving w/ me at the same time. he’s either ready or he’s not, and you can’t wait it out. i realized that day that i’ve never met anyone just so similar to me. i may or may not be cubbs when i come back. i remember we had a really deep conversation about our lives and he actually asked questions like “why do you make out with me? he’s probably just trying to get in there one more time, after which he’ll dump you again. i don’t understand what he is up to but i’m just trying to be a cool friend. i was under no illusions that it was anything more than just sex which suited me fine. most guys just hook up and move on or i guess the term ‘hit it and quit it’. i like his personality and just the way he lives his life. he is somewhat of the frustrated artist as well which adds to the reclusive behavior. i talked to him two or three times and he was still keeping up with his celibacy. just have fun and see what happens, you don’t have to get serious right away right?  he asked if i’d told anyone about us and i said yes a couple of friends, i asked him if he has told anyone and he said, exactly  “no i don’t think its a good idea to tell my kids as they would get upset and think i don’t have time for them or that someone will take time away from them” um i never asked if he’ told his kids and wouldn’t have expected him too, i haven’t told mine about him either. have stumbled up on this post and these comments in the middle of the night in the midst of a time of great personal turmoil…i found myself hoping there were recent posts and i could ask for a little advice and sure enough 🙂i am 24 and just broke up with my ex-fiance of four years. (he never tried to go further) the other night i went to his party and he asked me to stay the night. i know and feel that we had both developed feelings for each other. couples argue, it happens, it’s a normal part of relationships. long story short we had a conversation and he said something that i took the wrong way and pretty much thought he wasn’t interested in me at all. should take the risk and tell him i want more…instead of dropping hints…. he considers us friends, nothing more, nothing less and that he wanted us on the same page. he told me he hasn’t been able to feel this way ever since his official breakup with his ex a year ago as well. it’s very, very unusual for a guy to say that and then do a 180 and change his mind. his ex ended up dropping off his daughter that morning and so i did my best to avoid her and leave since that’s how things had been. given your anxiety and “crushing,” you don’t seem comfortable with the fwb arrangement either. when he was walking me to get a taxi, he finally kissed me (it was my very first kiss), it was really passionate and it went on for a long time (i’d never thought i’d be willing to engage in a somewhat intense pda – to be honest, i was really happy, i didn’t even realise where we were at some point). a sophomore in highschool and i recently moved to a very small town during first semester. he is however a very good guy and person, has very good values and not the type that would ever cheat or lie. so i let it go and we really didn’t talk much but he still stared at me all the time.’s talking oneself into the rationality of the arrangement (neither of us have time for a relationship, don’t want to get tied down, what about my career, etc etc), the rational setting of boundaries (you don’t have to call the next day, sleeping over is optional, yada yada yada), the repeating of “there’s no place like home” (“it’s only sex, i’m not having any feelings for him/her,”) the admission that they’d love to have a real relationship, endless questions about what this or that semi-romantic gesture means (holding hands during sex, making breakfast, calling for no reason), barely repressed frustration at the tantalizing could-be’s. my guy refers to it as ‘university dating’ (which is scary in itself, because that means he thinks that’s what we are doing as well) me and my guy were discussing it and he said “if he liked her hed let her know it, he would man up and ask her out before he lost her” and i said “but then again who would want to date their fuck buddy” and he says “you wouldn’t? however, many men don’t attach any importance to these behaviors. need advice on this one before i let him know what i feel with this. do not look for signs that he likes you as a substitute for his telling you directly. i emailed him the next day apologizing and don’t know how i took it that way and asked him what he meant by “where are we?-sometimes he’ll tell me he misses me already after only being apart for like an hour. i’ve recently met his friends and he even mention that i need to come over more often in front of them (i rebutted by telling him to invite me over more). for the long post, but i’ve never quite been through something like this. we came back to my place and fooled around some more…i guess my dilemma is that even though i didn’t know it at the time, i can’t keep my emotions out of it. we went shopping, had lunch, the whole nine yards and i paid for nothing. i’ve grown useto not hearing from him for several days, and seeing him once a week. love quotes inspired by rap songs (believe it or not). even told him no more hooking up and tried dating someone else. i’d say let it go for now, but stay alert to red flags or any signs of disinterest, attraction to other people, etc. things have changed, he does not text like he used too everyday, no goodmorning texts, not many flirty ones. he even called me “his girl” in passing conversation when it turns out i’d met sone friends of his and they’d been “friendly” toward me (small world). we didn’t get to hang out and know more about each other that much. it sounds like he shared his fears with you – were you honest about what was holding you back? after i didnt see him for like a month and a half. he’s wanted more from the start, and now you’re starting to have feelings for him. we met on fb but we seen eachother around as well as have mutual friends. his reason for being celibate was he felt like he was neglecting his friends among other things. so off to work i went and he texts me asking me back over. know he likes me but how can i tell if wants me for something serious or just fling? that killed my mood in particular about him, before the past even came back into the picture. to me, we were growing apart a month or two before i broke up with him, so i’m already pretty much over the relationship. i guess i didn’t mind doing this for so long cus i didn’t feel anything at the time, but now that i do, it just really messes with me. he said he likes me, lvoes spending time with me, etc etc, but a relationship would not be wise as our future is so uncertain (i may have to leave the country in a few months for school and he is also not sure where he will be). he treats me like his gf sometimes, calls me hunnie, kisses me all the time and one time i was joking that we should have a threesome with this guy( haha it was a joke! now it's just getting up the guts to talk to him about it…. the friendship aspect is still there, he remembers little things i say to him and asks my opinion on things that are important to him. if you continue seeing him this way, you’d only be making yourself a bad favor in falling for him deeper. also the whole time i have known this guy his friends always call him a man whore which concerns me a lot, but at the same time this summer i spent a lot of time with him to the point where i would have noticed if he was with lots of girls. i felt a connection but that could just be me.’m feeling embarrassed, a bit naive, and finally feeling what it feels like to be on the wrong end of dating.  we rescheduled again for the last day of classes before thanksgiving break, and he cancelled on me again. after awhile he got up and went to the bathroom..i had plans to leave to poland for a job opportunity soon. fake bf is when you are hooking up regularly with a guy, you think it is going great, it feels just like dating except that you have never actually had the define the relationship talk. he is announcing to the world that you are friends, not two people entering a romantic or committed relationship. in august i went to see him again but things went wrong and in september things started to go really bad.” and he came out and said “i don’t know if i want a relationship cus my past ones have ended badly and well we live in the same building so it’d be awkward. the point here is that, for booty call partners, the relationship is based on sex, so exchange of personal information is superfluous. we became friends and hang out with the same circle of friends often. thats what i got based on what you said) means he waited quite a bit to hook up with you – so obviously he invested time and thought you were a real prospect if hes going to wait that long. whole story sounds quite teenage maybe but we are both 30 years old! it may signal a desire for something more, or it may be his idea of heaven just as it is. i can stroke it, run my fingers through it, bury my face in it, feel its light feathery touch on my penis, etc… but as much as i love hair, i don’t have to love the girl attached to the hair in order to love playing with the hair. he has been bad about contacting everyone lately, but i said that i wanted to be important.: haha well if u can find the time stop by borrego 2nd, im the only one herethis is when i get annoyed. on the wednesday b4 thanksgiving, he was having minor surgery, so i decided to be nice and send him a text and he repsonded back in 2 minutes saying “thanks i really appreciate it, ill let u know how it goes, ill call u tomorrow” then on thanksgiving, he didnt call me but texted me that night saying “hey sorry i didnt call u, im not feeling well, will try to call u tomorrow but i cant make any promises” and he didnt call. so on friday i take her out to dinner and then we meet up with our friends and the whole night we are affectionately kissing and feeling each other and at one point she started rubbing my dick through my pants. once when we were in bed he said ” i love so much of you,” but we haven’t said the l word. i took it wrong because i had just gotten out of a long distance relationship and probably wasn’t ready to open up then.  we chatted for a long time about all of this, i think i mucked up a couple of times but hey we can only say what we do/don’t feel. he didn’t say much, just that i should tell him if i don’t want to do this anymore and he’ll understand. always makes little comments about how he wants to take me to some restaurant or place he likes or how we are spending more time together. i took it and me and the guy have now been exclusive for three weeks… best three weeks of my life to be honest. don’t get me wrong we talk about everything and anything, he does tell me things like he had a lot of love for me and cares about me, i just got sick and he was calling and texting every five mins. he never pressured me into having sex, but we did anyway under my request (i wasn’t used to waiting after being in a long term relationship). we’ve only been together for a little over a month.@csi was in an relationship which was not working i meet another guy online talked for about a week or two before meet seem to get along ok was alot of physical chemistry between us and could make me lauth seemed nice meet a few times ended up having sex with him he know i had boyfriend explained situation to him that we was pretty much over for years and that we was like friends and that i was going to end iti think he’s just after sex. well later on that night he was texting me to tell me lets do something on sunday i said ok. the first time we hooked up (last week) we kissed and touched ( fully clothed). the next morning i texted him & apologized for getting sick.”i have been seeing him for 3 months now, only a month after his break up.  we had a great weekend together this last weekend and it seems we both want it to be more than it has been so we will see what happens. i have an odd schedule (usually work weekends) so we kinda work around my work schedule. im asking for your opinion and you keep nonsensically beating around the bush. you could tell him you like him as more than a friend. i told him to tell me the truth, even if it hurts, and it took him awhile to respond back, i’m guessing either he put it to the side because i blew it and he didn’t care or because he was trying to figure out what to say. night i returned we met up, and i asked him what was up. i texted, invited him to places; now, he ignored me. i know that i can’t control what he thinks about me after the fact… but, is it possible to establish a more meaningful connection after the “lid is off of the jar”? as much as these words make me cringe it’s turned into making love. and if it doesn’t work out for some reason, better to know now. much does he give power to those people and how much could the impact be of derailing what is growing between us? hm, big surprise for me, he surely kept this a federal secret, but then again, leo's are trained to contain/conceal their feelings/emotions. we talked before, even had a normal conversation during the intimacy! that’s a total waste for you when you are in your prime!” i know he was hurt deeply by his divorce, though he speaks of it as if it was a loveless marriage, she pretty much broke the bank. said that’s fine, because deep down, i’m not the type to push people to doing things and i am a firm believer in letting things just happen. the thing is we made out and such, but he did not try to have sex with me. initially, it was one of those things where there were no expectations, casual, go with the flow kind of thing. anyway, i’m wondering if i should expect that he’ll want to keep seeing me in the fall, and if he does have any feelings for me. he finally responded telling me he didn’t want to hold me back and that he really wasn’t making sure i wasn’t with anyone, that he was just asking (which i don’t believe because he got jealous angry when i brought up the last guy, which wasn’t even a big deal to me). to me like you are in the awkward and unpredictable stage of figuring out whether and how you will transition from a few dates to actually dating. he looks into my eyes, moves my hair from my face and sometimes even just strokes my hair with his hand. i don’t know why things went wrong between you, but is this someone you respect and want to be in a relationship with? all his friends know this about him, he is far worse than the average guy in that department. i guess i just wanted to know but i should have waited. also i think we’re both moody and complex personalities, sometimes fickle. the end of february, we were hanging out in groups again because he would invite himself when i went out with our mutual friends. i hung out with him for the entire night just talking and watching movies, until he suggested we go star-gazing. (also if anyone else would like to comment, i would love to hear your thoughts):i’m a university sophomore studying far away from my hometown – a few months ago, i had an assignment, and my partner was a friend of a friend who happens to be in my program- we hit it off really well and we ended up hooking up the first night we met each other (incidentally out of character for both of us – that very night we had a talk suggesting that this was just to be a one night stand and that it was a one time deal).“i mean we only kiss but still is he just using me as someone to kiss? we haven’t had the talk but seem rather to make faint inplications of interest and intent; i’m not sure what either of us wants! i’ve always said actions speak louder than words so why wouldn’t that apply in this scenario? he would pop up into my work occasionally over these weeks that we were talking (he never came into my work before the first time i met him) we had made plans that the next weekend that our children were with our exes we would spend the weekend together. started to go out together; i started to like/notice him around mid december due to some heart-quality he showed to me and i was deeply moved by that way of being.” the result was always the same: only fwb or spending time together, cuddling until one of us finds someone else.. and i feel like its sincere bc he is kinda of a quiet more reserved guy, not someone who is fake outgoing. about the first week of march the following year, i saw that he had been crying in the back office. we hit it off, started talking and exchanged numbers, a week after that he sends me a text message and from there we kept in touch. so i told him i need time to get over it and he apologized for hurting my feelings. if there’s no verbal commitment, all the other stuff is just a fun little diversion for him, and is totally meaningless. (i guess that’s expected when we only hooked up once. i found out she was single and sent her a message on facebook, so i guess you could say this was basically the first time we had ever really spoke to each other. he turned into a complete idiot and for various reasons i knew that i was not ready. he said that he was there to make sure it was good for me so he kept delaying his own and asking what i wanted. time you have sex with a guy and then a few days pass with no word you have your answer: no relationship. and i forget to say that he also designated tuesdays as our movie night….. i left him our last night thinking everything was straightened out and we were fwbs only no more but he randomly texted me “have you been hooking up with anyone since you’ve been home? i know he has dated girls but from what i understand, they were all long distance relationships. do you think it’s now just a booty call or something more for him? sexual transaction (as opposed to an emotional connection) is typically marked by immediate post-doing-it comments such as, "thank you," "goodnight" or "see you next time. when we do talk, it seems like random small talk and we don’t always make plans for the next day or so on. if he cared he would have been eager to reassure you and clarify that he cares for you. i told him maybe it would be for the best. he figured out i love him, and instead of running for the hills… he was excited and all smiley about it. but after only the 2nd time we hooked up he was all cuddly and sweet and kissing me on my nose and forehead and said he liked me and even asked what my plan is for new year’s and it’s only august! no anger or emotion against him is necessary; again, it’s ok to be disappointed., i’ve been reading through all these stories hoping to find one similar to my current dilemma.. just say hi in passing but never take the time to stop and talk or catch up. i just let it go and finally he emailed me to see how i was doing and noticed some changes i’ve made (just school direction and such) and was writing to me like nothing bad happened in the past. my friends told me that i blew it and that was the only chance i was going to get because either he thought i responded that way because i wasn’t interested in him or because he is afraid of getting hurt. he stopped and we started talking for a couple hours after which he went back to his dorm. i do want love and partnership from this noncomformnist man.” and the truth is i am – “well yeah actually if i was to say im going on a date would you care?– tells me what type of woman he wants to marry, why he thinks the world of his amazing sisters, his career dreams and his future goals for his future children (seriously). well we did and during that he started kissing me, which made me uncomfortable and i asked him to stop. you have truly fallen for him, and you’ve been together sexually and socially for six months, you need to know where he stands. may do all this hooking up and stuff, which is fine, but if they dont care about a girl, they are really making it harder on us and make us feel worse by playing with our emotions. i was worried he would stop hanging out with me when i gave him that answer … but if anything, he has been more caring and thoughtful since that happened. in the beginning it was just sex and neither of us were particularly interested in helping the other. we've been friends for about a year and just started hooking up a few months ago, it's not awkward at all and i'm incredibly comfortable with him which is a rare thing for me. so, we have been dating since mid november (but keep in mind that thanksgiving break and a month apart during winter break are included) we texted all over january winter break, like he was super sweet and cute and really made an effort, calling me on the phone as well.  he thinks about me everyday and really misses me when we dont get the chance to catch up but its ok cos when we do its so much better. should i make the decision for him and leave it as plantonically as friends? sounds like a classic case of a guy who’s been burned bigtime, and may want to date a woman but a full-blown integrated relationship is going to be a long-range project for him. but alas i am falling for him, i am so confused about him though. i just know that i need to break away from both men. a guy looking to get laid is not right for you. what about a guy who is continually after you, even though you’ve ignored him, given him the cold shoulder, and even acted very obviously negative towards his advances?” we woke up and he left after a cup of coffee. we still emailed for the remainder of the 7 months before i got a surprise message from him after 7 months of emailing that he was back home for the holidays to visit and he wanted to see me so we made plans to see eachother and he drove down with a friend to stay with his other friend and make sure to see me. the only problem is now that i don’t have a bf i am developing feelings for him or at least am able to act on feelings i had but i am not sure how he feels. i said if things flow in a certain direction and it feels right and worthy, my life is flexible… hi smiled wide. on the other hand, he has never made a move or admitted this attraction, even to his friends., i love this freedom of not having my center of gravity evolve around the action or non-action of a man. but she was only there for a few months into the start of our emails and i guess she left. there is no way for you to salvage this – so resign yourself to the outcome with dignity. they’re far more interested in investing their effort into sexual relationships. so we did, and we had a really nice conversation.” i said that i was kidding and asked what answer he wanted so he played it off as a joke and moved past it. he has never said if he likes me or not and i cant figure it out. is either immature or unkind, but either way he is not relationship material, at least not now, and not for you. he moved back to his parents house, just 8 hrs away from where i live and a few days later on new years eve/day, he spent hours just texting me and focusing on me while at a party when most people would be having fun and just partying the night away. you’ll learn whether that’s the case if you are friendly and he is unresponsive or just polite. then life pulled us different ways, him to another part of the country for schooling and i with a 4 year relationship. i sort of thought he would either go all in, in which case, i would and could include him in my life plans and find a way of staying in the country and we could work on being together, or all out, in which case i could do whatever i please and know i am free. and how can i tell him about my concerns without seeming like i’m blaming him, or scaring him off?) should i just flat-out ask him, or do i have to get my head on straight first? i know this is my 3rd maybe 4th post but i am not getting anywhere, so anybody reading this please respond and susan if you do read all my posts as i said before i’d love to hear your straight up thoughts. so school was soon over and i stopped going a week before school turned out and he wasnt aware of me doing it but i didnt think he would care. if you said he was crazy about you and that the two of you wanted to go public with your relationship, i’d support that. i don’t know what i should do, or how i should feel. asked me out a day later and we had an amazing first date on the 1st of january 2012 that ended with breakfast and beer at 6 am.

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