Dating a man with no job or car
15 Guys to Avoid Dating at All Costs | The Huffington Post
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Dating a man with no job or car
it isn’t wrong for you to want to be with someone who’s a bit more financially stable or an equal partner. at the same time, i have been waiting and its been one thing after another. whose wives make more money are 61% less likely to say they’re happy. he always paid but now don’t anymore because of this. want to continue relationship but seems like he will never get out of this rut – he may not even want to. if you’ll leave him because he makes less, but works hard, take a look at your shallow self..anyways here it goes; the story: i was a 25 year old college student when i starting dating the girl that would be my girlfriend for the next 5 years – she was a 24 year old japanese college student in san francisco on a student visa. i pay for a lot but because his situation is so bad and hasn’t and doesn’t seem to be getting better, i’m really leaning on not having him live with me which is something we’ve talked about doing for many years now. often times when this line is pulled, its code for "i'm looking for a marriage and kids, just not with you. and though you might think im bitter too or its just my perspective as a “poor guy”… i think marrying a man you love & believe in can only lead to happiness, because every man is waiting for his 1 oppertunity & if he has someone who loves him, supports him & depends on him, he will move mountains (we invented c4…) & travel too the moon & back for you. so, instead of jumping into that long-term relationship with a man you suspect may be wrong for you, let's take a look at fifteen types of guys to avoid getting into long-term relationships with in the first place. my book, living at home up until age 25 is acceptable, provided the guy was going through schooling or saving up money. the author tell what happens to a man who will not grow up and own his manhold.’s settled in to the city but doesnt have means to do anything: finish getting his degree, take classes he needs for acting, take me out, fly to see his mom, fly to see my family, go to movies, barely has enough money to buy groceries. is 40% more likely when a women makes over 60% of the family’s income. love, justice, wisdom, patience, and hard work are a lot more useful in starting and maintaining a successful relationship. he told me he was a manager at a fast food restaurant.. did he have that before you married him, or was that a discovery after-the-fact? if you stay the same and he is forced to do all the changing, then you two are only switching the misery around, and not actually solving anything. if that life never has a vacation, a retirement, overpriced meals out, a mansion on a hill, or a boat-load of shiny worthless crap, too freaking bad. if you had a kind personality then you would see that there are many women that are kind hearted out there and are not just live in hookers., regardless of gender, who asks for help paying bills early on in a relationship should raise red flags. we are not only suffering because of it but our children are incurring the most damage due to social engineering. hmm, i’d say patriarchy has done a lot more damage — to men and women — than feminism. perhaps i made a mistake in my one and only relationship choice 14 years ago, but it wasn’t some fly by night 6 month thing, we dated for 3 years and we’re married for 8, but that relationship has left me, according to this, pretty hopeless, and deemed utterly worthless. what kind of respect is built off of a relationship designed like a business transaction with a… a whore? said he has worked the majority of the time since he has been here and is studying accounting. you marry a woman who made more money than you?, it makes me wonder if men should be pre-filtering women not only on appearances and personality but on income as well, as if i’m earning six figures, i would love for my partner to also earn six figures such that she can support her own spending and not require any financial aide. have two degrees and work as a professional and he ran his own business. i don’t think he is any of these things because he focuses on things he believes to be more important. so my choice is either to pay for his education, ask my dad to help him to actually start a real business or to leave. the problem is hes none of that, i feel so drained off energy, and lack of a future. i have applied for hundreds of jobs (including the bottom of the barrel positions) and been interviewed maybe three times in the last year and i am lucky to get a three month contract at minimum wage. he obviously works all the time and i don’t want anybody to think that i’m a burden. that child is now #1, and his needs go 1000% above you and your man’s. yes, you can agree that there may be many things you share in common (although he is saying that; are you? that said, if the only cooking your man does is heating up his general tso’s in a dirty microwave, it may be a sign of something more serious. me, a chiseled, 6foot athletic guy with all his hair, married to a 5foot tall woman, obese with coke-bottle glasses, severe acne and speech impediment. if you are not financially stable why get married or date , use that dating time to find a job and earn enough to be stable period. make no mistake, i work hard, am ambitious and passionate about my career, and being able to make enough to support myself so as to not be a burden on someone – which i do – is extremely important to me. remember we are omnivores & while we where hunting, women were gathering. play close attention to how a guy's behavior changes once he has had sex with you for the first time. you for the recommendations too i will definitely check them out! you are right, it is possible for him to pull you down financially and that won’t be easy to get back once done. i think he had issues with his mother and i do believe that he had some kind of subconscious need to passively humiliate me and one way he was doing it was by forcing me to support him when he decided to lose his job..if we go places i pay for them, if he and i go on dates i pay for it 95% of the time bc he doesnt make enough. i guess for me it wasn’t a deal breaker but it would be much easier if he could make even 30k a year. you’ve got the right attitude, but obviously you haven’t run into the real world yet.’s the problem in a couple if either the man or the woman earns enough to support both of them? all it did was make me miserable, and enabled him to do nothing but enjoy my comfy home and chill in front of my tv all day while i busted my ass all day at work. men still make more every dollar than women which is absolutely ridiculous this day and age. i know you mean no harm or ill will, but the fact you’re questioning a future with an otherwise great sounding man because you’re worried about money in retirement regardless of he, by your own admission, is doing the best at everything he can is the keynote idea behind this entire article. but i don’t see you and other women like you ready to jump on gloria steinhem in the defense of men and those gender stereotypes. and while i am there, once you have a saggy belly due to kids, well, do not be surprised and complain when your man is going for a nice chick behind your back. but aside from the obvious traits one should avoid in a mate: aggression (passive or outright), disrespect, a lack of manners, empathy and/or intelligence, there are those red flags that look a softer shade of pink behind rose-colored glasses. i just need a man to help me and i believe in equality, if not the man be more responsible for the financial stuff. of the discussion around this topic so far has focused on the broader business and economic consequences of this shift. even though he does work part time, i told him that life is much more expensive. he swears that from this settlement, he is going to get a million dollars because his is a professional boxer, but nothing real big from boxing. that’s why age-defying cosmetics and plastic surgery is a multi-billion dollar industry for women. you are already lucky in love — you found a man who loves you and whom you adore. i’m 31 years old and i’m currently dating a 32y old man who is unemployed, uneducated, has no car, and lives at home with his mommy. he would pay for dates when he could, but other than that i would generally pay but it wasn’t an issue for me. it would seem that the women that find themselves dating “poor guys” who have responded where not so much dating “poor guys” as losers. he has an ad in information technology but isn’t using it. it isn’t that you’re too picky or that your guy is irresponsible. but, ok, let’s not go into that; let’s just address what you said: “there is nothing wrong with being a sahd. men offer women firstly the opportunity to forge a career for themselves. im quite broke because of an accident on a wrongly insured car and taking out a loan for an mba coupled with some health debts. yes he works temp jobs but its just enough to buy his toiletries and a bus pass. how much are the two of you willing to sacrifice for each other to become the “till death do us part” family you desire and should be? if you married and your wife became paralyzed, unable to have sex, unable to contribute much but a ssdi check, would you stick around forever?’m 26 years old, privileged (no debt thanks to parental support through college) and on the path to earn a high salary later. pray precious for god to show you because only god knows the heart of us all. there are many contributing factors to someone’s financial status.” that way she, and her mother can say yes he does ____ for a living, he has no problem taking care of the household. i consistently wind up with men that start out (what looks to be financially secure), only to have them all lose their jobs (yes, 4 of them), even though 2 of them were my boss at one time. you like being indoors more than being outdoors, this may be a good match for you. better yet, these traits can help to make a relationship work even when you’ve had an initial set-back. if you can withdraw anymore it’s off to the next atm. forbid if a high salary career woman should ever go with a man that makes a lot less money than she does. i mean i had her laughing, smiling, thinking & orgasming everyday… but she dumped me. a caring, selfless and helpful person are nice bonuses, but unless he has a high income, he isn’t even in the game. for those of you who buy into feminism, gloria steinem worked for the cia and feminism was a deliberate social engineering of society that no one benefitted from but the govt. he pays a lot for kids as he made good money but spent way more then he made. responses to “he’s broke, you’re not — do you date him? you’ve got to make sure that the relationship is solid and can handle the conflict no matter what,” she says. i have always encouraged him to go back to school, but every time he keeps postponing on the excuse that we do not have enough money to support his education. they finally realized that all of you are just a bunch of whores, so they lost interest in you. should one tackle the delicate topic of “pocket money” for the husband? every day i struggle to keep myself together, he’s painfully optimistic but i’ve lost faith in our economy. i am tired of this as he does not help himself to find other means of work outside of his business which only really runs well for 3 months a year. he has actually recently started talking about how he doesn’t like his current job and i got excited thinking he was finally going to try. i have dated many women i thought they were loving and nurturing creatures but after dating and being in many realsionships they were all the same. hes from a poor background and so i am i. anyways, this timeline and huge risk/reward mentality is incompatible with women that just want a nicely package man tied with a red ribbon. my big concern is not that he doesn’t have a lot of money but that he has a lot of debt. i’ll never let them see it, especially the boys, but being a man today is nothing but a cruel joke. if history is hard to face, maybe something in related fields or something brand new. how can a man feel ‘manly’ when he can’t provide. i have now spent thousands of my investment money to help us move on but no more. is these same high paid assholes that are the problem, not low paid broke men. —be honest now ladies— the answer, by your own admission here, and on countless other forums just like this, is an astounding and very passionate “hell no, and i’ll scream sexual harassment if you even ask! can you accept that maybe you will be the main contributor? he is great with my son, plays with him, teaches his chores and also disciplines him. while honorable on one level, on another, i think its stupidity. whether one trait or the other is exhibited by predominantly one gender – well there are many opinions and “studies” out there. and it wast long before that classing lead to the women of wealthier men being able to have nicer things than other women. i say this as a woman who makes more than the average income anyway. they can bring home an income and be wonderful caregivers for their kids, but the message i was trying convey to you is that since we learn gender roles early on, it is to no surprise why as young boys, one would learn values that are geared more towards homeward stability and success, rather than other virtues, i. so this is it 30 single like normal and unable to get better work due to education mainly. do make money but do not love it, so give give give, good business model….? i’m beginning to see why the patriarchy was so important for human survival for so long. think what a lot of women are seeking is someone like you, who essentially has their shit together/getting it together, regardless of income (to me, anyway), and are able to contribute in some manner or another. it was nightmare that only got worse as i began to put the pieces together. i was devastated and depressed for years, but now i know better than to think that i can hold a rattlesnake and not get bit. i wouldn’t date an obese man — would you judge me for that? educated women don’t want anything to do with you, which is why you are now paying for hookers…… oh, and btw…. “don’t jump the gun until you know the full story,” advises estes. my parents dissapproved of our staying together but i always he thought when i get a good job and earn good money we will make things work out. provides great emotional support, great sexy times, great conversations, great humor, helps around my apartment when i ask him, etc. and really, who wants to make out with a man baby? i am not looking for anyone to support me, or give me gifts, but sharing expenses equally would be just a dream come true.) now, 40 percent of women are the breadwinners in their family, thanks to feminism, and there are more than a million men who are sahds. very impulsive and careless about money buying weed, ciggarettes, sex toys, going nights out with the boys. these conditions does not mean you are loved any less or more – because you are not truly loved either way. no more true creativity, ingenuity and enterprise is required as computers are starting to do that for us. but this should never trump the responsibilities of a relationship or take precedence over family obligations. just remember it does take two to tangle to get married since many of us men which i will admit that i really hate to be single when many of us would’ve been all settled down by now with our own good wife and family had we been born many years earlier since we really could’ve avoided this mess today. he is supposed to dominate the woman & she is supposed to submit to him. no that we had gotten into a big argument, he said that people who leave him during hard times are not good people. doesnt bother me though, as i feel a particular way about money vs self worth (because there where people living & eating & marrying looong before the rothschilds invented money…), but i would like to think i am smart, i am okay looking i guess (i tend to garner the odd smile from a pretty girl on a good day), am ambitious in the sense that i would like to make my mark in history & change the world for the better (i do actively try to do this & am not just a “dreamer”) & i have a job. nor does it mean that i am incapable of love. do not worry i will pick up the tab this weekend. and in the case where it is by choice, it is more by guilt. i also think that a person needs to be the best they can for themselves before they can be in a loving relationship with another. now, at that stage i was working as a waiter as i had been pulled out of varsity that year when my parents split (like in chasm) so i was not sure what to do with my life & since mom was unemployed * i needed income, i became a waiter. have 80k in debt and you’re trying to say it’s not as bad because the monthly payment is low? i said i’ve been trying so hard to turn my life around but i just get the impression as long as i’m not pulling in big bucks it doesn’t count for anything. i receive no childsupport, (since i’m male, the county doesn’t care to pursue it) and am forced to rely on shameful government handouts to make ends meet, and keep food on the table. there a more inspiring image of the stay-at-home dad than mr. to me men who don’t live out the three p’s are emotionally stunted and by virtue of their behaviors will put any woman in a mother role. by your side in a nursing home everyday while your mind slowly fades away, or cancer slowly eats your body? however, the restraining order shows up once the background check comes back. the “shotgun” approach of randomly trying things in the attempt to find something that works, doesn’t. but i was tired of paying for every date, all the gas, all of the “extra stuff”. if you think otherwise, i hope you get what you deserve, to die alone, unloved, and totally forgotten. however, he has no home, has loans, pays child support for 2 children, and has a job that doesn’t have a lot of long-term prospects. read on for four non-negotiables that are often overlooked, but that i’ve learned to hold on tightly to. back to kids and career and so much happier to boot. books that will teach you things that you don’t know. sadly, i’ve spent the past twelve years as basically a full-time caregiver for my elderly father (and my mother before she passed away), so i had to turn down a doctoral acceptance and lost out on the prime of my career’s growth years. is it that a man who earns twice as much as a women or ten times as much as the next man is considered good marriage material…why? he works hard at a job he’s had over 15 years, but for some reason he lost his house to foreclosure and has had vehicles repossessed. i considered that part of my “job” as a man in a relationship, even if i had no ability to do so. as long as their is that, a woman with integrity stands zero chance of ever finding a partner. we relocated to a different state so he could attend trade school, and i started my career in education. find several things in this article that go against what i have personally experienced as a poor woman., lets hear from the “ostracized” men working for good causes who are shunned by a women at burger king. who say that can bullshit themselves in thinking they do not love money but they can’t bullshit me. it confuse me when a woman think a man should do everything and she enjoys herself with hers. also my husband was my first love; the thought of getting into the dating seen in my late thirties was nothing short of daunting. a person with a bachelors, two masters, and my jd, i have more education (and student loans) than most. a man’s money or lack thereof was never a big thought of mine bc ive always been independent. you cant really defend against it because you can only progress so far in your born class. and if the world and all it’s problems are anything to go by…. i don’t have to many preferences either, just no children. work is licensed under a creative commons attribution-noncommercial-no derivative works 3. eventually my roomate (who was a nightmare…) drove me up the wall & hers became all controlling & we got our own lil posher than we could afford apartment. it’s more important to examine how the two of you work through these issues. a world of dating sites and swiping right, couples who do everything together may seem retro and cute from the outside, but there’s a real value in flying solo, even when attached. on top of that he comes from a very poor background. i’m very independent and do for myself not expecting a man to fund me or my life so it wasn’t an issue. know you wrote this in february, but i needed to chime in. but i am a mghow(if you dont know what that is google it) so asking a woman out is out of the question and rejecting women does indeed give me a thrill. “it’s not just about financial security, it’s also about showing that someone is willing to get up every day and do what it takes to take care of themselves and work towards a higher goal. if you go down that dark and devasting path, it must be absolutely necessary and unavoidable because of truly unreconcilable conflict over your spirituality and he, after knowing completely how you feel, and having no desire to make himself better in some way for you and the child. he is an aspiring actor with one min wage, full-time job. written by a man that has no respect for kthers, feels lonely but convinces himself he needs nobody and is to good for any woman. he knows that i have a daughter and that i live a very hard life paying the bills and going to school. agree with the if my mindset is “i’m not smart” i will project that but i don’t think i do, i don’t go round to people saying “i’m not smart” or anything i think i’m pretty happy and cheery around people i just yeah, i’m not sure really. but 1 decided to sleep with 5 guys at a party because “she was drunk” & they paid her & the other (most recent) decided to go back to baby dadd because he wanted to buy her a new car.” but the reality is, is he works part time and can barley help me pay anything on the bills. so i began telling people i was an orphan, thinking it would remove the stigma. be with a broke guy is ok, to be with a broke guy that has no hustle is not! in a few years, he might be in a better financial place and marriage would be more attractive. say, “for the record, feminism did not strip those traditional-minded men from their jobs or fates — technology, job outsourcing, the decimation of unions, the great recession, etc. shows low self-esteem and not willing to improve your position in life, or just be happy with yourself. again, not you or the article more just the general vibe i have been getting from various other articles and the comments to these types articles. no one is perfect, so at times when you fail, he’s there to cover for and carry you, and vise versa. kicked him out and now he is living with the women is cheated on me with, using her just like he used me but still emails me telling me how much he loves me…. a man like that will not appreciate it because you have given him nothing to work for. now, as an adult, she expected to have the same lifestyle afforded by her bank exec dad (take out everyday, shopping sprees, parties) & i, having grown up the opposite was more pragmatic. assuming a marriage has occurred, a woman will look down upon a man who has gone down in financial status, whereas a man will not look down upon a woman who does down in financial status. think about it: in school, it was easy to meet new people, but as we grow older, the opportunities to make new friends (and see old ones) can seem more limited which means unless your guy has a solid crew of constant companions, he’s likely not going to always have someone to do something with. because who want’s a man broken by a woman……. have been reading these posts because i am currently ending a 10 year relationship with a man who had a job when i met him but quickly lost his job, but refusing to go to work, after he and i moved in to the house i bought.
Dating a man with no job
when a female takes care of the house and supported financially, it’s seen as babysitting the male. maybe instead of focusing what you think you’re not “smart” at, you acknowledge all the things you’re great at, good at and pretty good at. he has a degree but doesn’t work a full-time steady job. we tend to forget that we are all individuals on a life journey who choose to walk together, and being in a relationship doesn’t change that. know that he has not been as privileged as i have been and maybe i’m overly sensitive about that and the fact that they are from the ghetto so maybe they can use some help coming up. i’m not saying to give up and sit on welfare, you have to bust your butt for anything worthwhile, unless your one of the 1%ers, but don’t expect to go too far above your born station without a heck of a lot of luck. as far as being wired or created, that’s a bunch of bs. last 2 went along similar veigns, accept i was not between jobs. then he started applying to jobs where he actually makes less! i am a working female that’s makes “okay” money. this: i am a mother of two children and i cannot (and will not) support feminism. i ever marry again, i’ll look most for someone who will love me and treat me well. but the grass is not always greener on the nicely manicured lawn!.only to learn, for poor women, men still yield all the power. after all, if it wasnt for us, the rich guys wouldnt be rich enough to buy you., i’m not talking todd english-style dishes and floors so clean you can eat off of them (though, both would be nice). your hurting someone who loves you, that makes you the one using him, or trying to. don’t be surprised if he ends up resenting you or chasing after a women that isn’t so accommodating. i have lived with my partner for over 6 years now and his business does not balance the books and i often pay for most things as his money tends to go back on the business or his own needs. why a man needs a woman to sate him & why a woman needs a man to protect her. your kids have already lost their father; you want to be very careful about not causing more loss in their young lives right now. i don’t know if you have or will have a daughter remember she is a woman. since, i’m somewhat old fashioned, that just did not work.’s fine to have dating preferences and as long as you say that upfront — not interested in overweight women or women with children, etc., at this point, other than for sex, i ignore women, because i know any early steps in a relationship ends with a grimace on her part when she finds out i live in a basement. if a man is careless with his money, don’t enable him by contributing more than you feel womanly comfortable. i googled this subject because i am currently considering moving things from a friends situation to dating, with a guy i have been friends with for over a year. but i was not entirely un interested & would flirt with her alot over the years & we’d kiss at parties etc. i am currently dating an unemployed man that is recently divorced. needless to say, we tried working on them but to no avail. for way too long, we needed to marry to survive (we couldn’t even get a credit card in our name until the 1960s, and men could beat and abuse us legally! take that away from him, and the result is… a man who will accept his fate as the men who equate themselves to anything less than satisfactory – without aspiration. i think it’s really hard for women to give up being treated like princesses. women thing, so blaming one gender or the other is useless and solves nothing (if there’s a problem, let’s solve it together, not finger point! was my supposed loving girlfriend at the time when i couldn’t work?, here’s how it appears to work:Unemployed, under-employed and low-paid women are still dateable and marriage material, while guys are not. might want to “when” yourself back to school in order to learn how to “write/spell” yourself. he has no job, no car, lives at home with his mother and he is on parole. unless you’re god, i dont know you, but i feel you are wrong and its because of your choices. you are a very empowered woman and you deserve a man who will love you right because you trully deserve it believe me. the funny thing is, he is the first man i have met that it didn’t bother. i take responsibility for allowing things to get to where they are. i disagreed because i’m a ‘take you as i find you’ kind if woman though so his situation didn’t put me off him. eventually, about a year after she got hired in japan, her ego became too big for me to fit inside her heart, and she dumped me dramatically and even with hatred in her words. opposite of number eleven, the over-controlling guy must know where "his woman" his every second of the day and approve of who she is hanging out with. i let him go home because i’m not ready to take him as my responsibility permanently. he is out of dept as well and lives on the dole (government benefits) to help him get by till he finds work. i was in this kind of relationship, you will never be happy as you end up giving all the time and you never get anything back, if he’s broke now, he is always broke as he will never step up, he’s got no money so he should work harder now and to get there. i see personal ads online with huge lists of requirements then see a morbidly obese, tatooed single mom making the demands. no one should be doing all of the work, you have to have a happy medium. once he found a job he said he will pay me back. not saying he’s not a good man, its really down to what is important to you.. as myself i don’t look for how much money someone has or makes when getting to know them. let’s hear from men who saved an american woman from a life at burger king."even at my age, 75, and dating if you can believe it if a man is not employed, volunteering, involved in life it's a deal breaker," patricia weaver, a 75-year-old film maker said in a statement. while many men may seem ideal after just a few weeks of dating, upon closer inspection, there can be warning signs that you should avoid a relationship with this person.” in short, during her young, hot “party” years, a girl will favor alpha characteristics in the men she dates. i saved more money by having a work friend as a roommate. an out meal is a joke if the hours of sacrificing your life and time at work in order to pay for that meal takes longer than that meal can sustain your body. my relationship with a broke, long term unemployed man who lives with his mother., i know several career woman, a doctor, an attorney, an entrepreneur and a marketing specialist, among them, who married men who made a lot less (or none; they were sahds) than they did. i still know several poor old guys, who ran through several marry ups, and are back living with their mothers or a new gf. like others have stated earlier, i am exceedingly depressed and saddened by this article and many others like it i’ve found because i see now that for someone like me there is virtually no hope. he’s great in many ways but this money thing ugh! i was going through the comments, the favored wieghed heavily in the belief that your spouse must be finacially stable in order to be worthy of love. only about six months after she started working as a professional (cock sucker…haha, jk) she started pointing out often – over the phone – that i was a college student, and it was clear that she was trying to make me feel inferior to her – trying to make me feel like i was a child, and she was an adult woman. damnit… i think we have become to caught up in the big sale of affluence, that is designed to make us spend & make the makers of expensive things more affluent than us (and thus allow them to exercise their ideal that it makes them better than us, regardless of inbreeding & depravity), that we have lost the meaning of love. i don’t want to come across as being snobbish so i tend to overlook many things. we are supposed to be so flexible and understanding while most of you accept nothing less than perfection from a man. (that job coming with free take aways is a happy accident. you have absolutely no right to bitch unless you are hungry, sick, or homeless through no fault of your own. it was known early on in our relationship that bf makes a lot less money than me, but i didn’t care. i made a huge mistake by letting my ex live with me for free so he could pay off his issues faster, fix his car, go to court to get custody of his child (which he never did) kept making excuses because he didnt make enough money. of the “working men” you seek are in china because that’s where all the work has gone; where everything is actually being made. to make matters more difficult, i am the sole caretaker of 4 small children (2 of which aren’t even mine) as “mom” decided some years back to go pursue greener and less encumbered pastures, leaving them all with me plus her 40k in student load debt, as i loved and trusted her, and cosigned the loans while married. i’m not saying it’s good or bad; it just kind of is. men who expect you to clean up their dishes, pick up their clothes and take care of them as if they are little children on a consistent basis need a really check, and will likely treat you as if you are their mother for the rest of their lives. when looking for and dating a man you have to pay close attention to his values and his ambition. i could of supported him “john” with just my earnings. you date a guy with no job, no car, who's on parole? but he started paying off the debt by working two full-time jobs. of course, requiring that a man bring home the bacon like bono is hardly behavior i’d condone (make your own moolah, babygirl), but as a woman who has dated the perpetually unemployed, i can tell you that expecting him to have a solid job, work history, and career-plan should be a no-brainer. instead i relish my independence and all of my healthy male aggression and super powers goes toward: work, entrepreneurial efforts, food, fitness, self-healing, real sex when i have money, porn when i don’t have money, etc. i am not asking to be taking care of, infact i have always taken care of me and my baby. a multi-billion-dollar market which exists, where i’m a middle man to 10,000 people already, all of which are using my software platform (for free). i paid for most dinners and food plans we have a plan to go out of the country for new year and i think its on me :(. issue is why he is not solvable, because he is lazy? in the new testiment, when asked by a rich man what he could do to be “saved”, christ replied, “sell all you have, give it to the poor, then follow me”. he claims he is not but his actions tell me he is comfortable being taken care of by a woman (be it his momma or me). i earn more than my previous partners and if i am the main provider financially then it would be nice if the man balances it out by being romantic and attentive in the relationship, then income is not so much of an issue. simply being able to support myself as an individual, beyond the next paycheque or two, is more of a factor than being potentially able to support a partner/family/household., turns out he is in serious credit card debt (not from clothes, vacations, etc) but he stopped paying off his visa in full in late 2009 and his usual acceptable expenses and the interest kept adding up so that now he’s k in credit card debt. but the truth is, as much as we often ignore the warning signs of a potentially bad relationship early on in the dating process, these issues don't go away. to them, being the ‘authority’ and maintaing their self esteem is contingent upon the hierarchy of the pay scale. i’ve held the same salaried teachers position for 4 years, in addition to taking on odd jobs and side hustles to support us while he studied his trade. course, if you reduce women to nothing but their physical appearance, then you deserve these people anyway. it make a difference if a man doesn’t make a lot by virtue of his profession (artist, musician, teacher, etc. i’m a ‘take you as i find you’re kind if woman though so his situation didn’t put me off him. i’d like to think the world isn’t primarily filled with such fickle, materialistic people. you whine about women not giving you a chance, but i don’t see you trying to date old, fat, ugly women. so when i had to take a stand against my racist boss, i did & resigned, inspiring 15 people to walk out with me (by my actions, not by persuading them to leave). your partner should be an asset not a constant bill…. i thought i’d share my story since i’m really kind of unsure how to move forward. so i end up carrying the bill for all 3 of us. i’m not yet 40 and would love to marry again. i may have to leave him for his lack of focus. guys like to fix things, your man is a cook, he likes to build something from nothing. some women are willing to put more into the finance for a genuine nice guy. realistically, at 49, things are looking bleak in the man department but in five years i know that will change for me. sensible is not being uncomfortable in a situation no matter how loving it can be behind doors. don’t get me wrong, i share the blame also for allowing this behavior for so long. my vehicles, no credit card debt ever and a nice retirement set aside when the time comes. the couple can avoid violating the “man earns more” social norm if the woman works part time or leaves the labor force altogether. i am tired of hearing mostly women whining about how their current flavor of the month man can’t afford to pay for a dinner or a vacation, or they leave the man over worries of retirement money. he’s not a bum, he just sucks with money. i teach them about budgeting and one is great at saving, the other not so good but still make him pay me something every month. he had a temp job and then got laid off, applied for his life insurance certification which took forever and i let him borrow the money to pay for the test. all my girlfriends adore my boyfriend as a person, but they all completely understand the struggle i am having. even though he does not want to be a financial burden, but he does not get a lot of money, because going by the standards i am seeing, that basically is a coin toss between “no, your a worthless bum regardless of who you are as your a penniless deadbeat. as of yesterday i told him “the bank of me is now closed” we don’t have any food for tonights dinner unless i buy it again. but would like to be with a partner wheo earns enough that we get by comfortably. i basically forced him to get a job at a place where i had just gotten a job at. i’m also 60, and with a man who has nothing to his name.. big, unexpected and really …really surprising problems between male and female, or wife and husband. the more you work on yourself and build self-confidence, the more you can bring to the relationship. not me, not the women who don’t share the same vision as you, not feminism. i have not “turned him into the woman” so to speak. we have forgotten what it means to choose to claim another as your own. when work finally died down for good i paid for his airfare and gone home back to his home country. i wouldn’t date a smoker — would you judge me for that? i did so for other reasons but once i did i looked back and saw i had been used all along for money., so here’s the deal: after reading this article and many comments, i feel obliged to share my personal experience on the matter at hand. he is currently bothering me to return to our past relationship where he knew that all was secure because i would absolutely take care of the bills and he simply did not have to worry about anything, not even holding on to a job, i finally realized that this man is financially irresponsible and that i should have seen from the very beginning but i was in “love”. love is never easy to walk away from without knowing you tried enough, but it can also destroy you. really dig me, but i have low self-esteem and don’t feel comfortable dating. (i just have a different sort of baggage of my own. hope you remember that you grandmother,mother,aunts and sister or sisters are women. you are a resource, and nothing more, as long as you let women such as this define your value for you. is not a feel-good “kumbaya” thing; everyone is good at at least one thing, and most likely more. only thing is like i said i’m not the smartest person so i’m not going to be able to go out and get some flash high rolling career but i would like to earn more money, problem is due to my i suppose social anxiety the thought of going to uni or something like that scares the hell out of me, i know not many people will understand as not many people have social anxiety but trust me it is incredibly hard to go out of your comfort zone in a social situation, i’m even finding getting out and driving to be difficult sometimes. it is not a healthy relationship at all and if he really loves you, he will at least be sensitive with your needs. it may not seem like much but to a woman her self esteem is shattered. on the point of rather than see myself as not smart but rather focus on the things i am good at, that i am smart about. perhaps whoever wrote this article was not raised around poor and desperate to climb out of it, opportunists. this tard guy here who talks about truth and righteousness that all women are golddiggers is not a truther, he is a fucking liar. my only focus now is to make sure as best as possible these wonderful, blameless small children at least get a better chance than i did. i’m resented by my neighbors as “poor white trash” and for “milking the system”. i have one 5k credit card and an 80k student loan. i wouldn’t date a pedophile — would you judge me for that? and many of us men which i am sure that many others will agree with me as well since many of us had really been hurt by these type of women already. contrast, once a woman hits 30, she realizes that her looks (her most important commodity in the sexual market place) are now a depreciating asset. am a high school graduate with no college, and yet i have been able to support myself my whole life. i always got a hard time from other women for accepting him with all these flaws in their book. but i am a hard worker and have always been indapendant.. some women/men are all about materialistic things but some are not. she makes a lot of money and there really is no reason for me to work. now i never previously cared if a partner of mine had money or not, until now, since i have been dating someone for 3 months, who has no money. it depends on the person, not the class itself, and it is so sad to see people hurt from this attitude. in short it looks like his mum doesn’t like me. if he refuses to do his part, always puts it off until “tomorrow”, or worse, thinks that only ladies do laundry, pack up and go.’m dating a broke man and while i love him, at times, its very challenging. it was as if he enjoyed not having to work, but still being able to live comfortably. long story short, society would have judged that i was way out of her league, and she knew it, but i put myself out there for her and stood by her side regardless and showed her how to love and how to be loyal despite what ‘others’ may think. i have learned from learning from my mother’s morals and living around a liberal city that it is not what is on the outside like looks, money, or other material things that make a person desirable, it is what is on the inside, as that reflects on the outside. best wishes to you, i truly hope you are one of the lucky few, cause it’s all luck, not skill or hard work. if he can’t afford an apartment, all the utilities, a car payment, grocery, and save a little money all by himself, don’t get involved. so why would a man want to keep a leeching whore like you around? our teens, being in the band made a man sexy. good men project recently pondered, what’s a man without money? we married for love not money, and we were incredibly happy. get off your butt and get and education, so you may write/spell more clearly and potentially earn a better living. i have tried pushing him to either run a business or go to cookery college, but yet i see no effort on his side. he’s had four jobs in a short period of time, at least he goes and gets another. women are actually worse off today than when my grandmother raised her children. if the woman can pay for something, cool, but i have always felt, as harry truman said, “the buck stops here”, with me, meaning the final responsibility falls to me, the male, and me alone. by paying for him early on, you are setting the tone that it will be this way for your entire future. there’s a lot the two of you will need to discuss and get in writing; how he responds to that may tell you all you need to know. i am almost poverty and work over 40 hours a week. know how you feel – i’ve just broken up with someone because of being in a similar situation. what this article is really saying,if you read between the lines, is that women have nothing to offer men that they cant get from an escort and a nanny. about me: i have more than i need, a great job, and a great girl. like jeez buddy lets breathe & respect each other…) it is actually true what messenger said (with absolutely no tact & way, way too much gusto) we have lost you guys hey. if he doesn’t want a better life for himself on his own, you helping him isn’t going to change anything. the only thing that ever overcomes our human selfishness that so often destroys families and couples is a willingness by both people to give of themself to the other 100% in all things at all times, not to merely meet in the middle. it isn’t your problem that he’s “tired” of watching you “eat your money” (at the same time, is he trying to tell you that you could be more financially responsible? men have to become "fathers" and financially support and take care of their children! that’s why men don’t hunt, fish, golf, or even drink alone at any age, it sucks. i could pay for someone to take what you have. it is not, it is sex driven very very often..be it ,a male or female to marriage, be it rich/poor…its never encouraging them marriage—–but unfortunately man cannot live without women nor women without man by law of nature. because as much as there are women who are willing to give so called “poor guys” a go… they are few & far between. probably not if this article and it’s responses are where we are at…. if so, skip down a few sentences, if not stop bailing him out! we never resented each other for our ability or inability to make money. lets see if this relationship can survive now the money has been cut off. let him know that while you love being with his kids, he needs to pay for their food/activities, etc. whats written, i have been dating this guy for abit more than a month, he said he is a freelancer designer and director infact he is but he is not doing great business as such market is tight at our place. i just think that a man should be able to at least pay half.
When should i start dating in college,
Dating a guy with no job or car ultimately, it is not about rich or poor … its about honesty, and respect. but if i were an unemployed man — regardless of age — would the same rules apply?” while some may choose that (and they should marry women who are the ones who have those traditional values, too, if they want a happy partnership), others may want something other than that — let’s respect, honor and encourage their choices, too, ok? would like some input as to how i can turn down someone, without seeming like a horrible person. if a man thinks he can buy my love with money, forget it. so women then chose the man they wanted & he preoccupied himself with providing for her. course it's not uncommon for people looking for a relationship to keep a mental checklist of qualities required of their potential lovers, but a recent survey revealed that a whopping 75 percent of straight women had problems with dating an unemployed man. i am a women who “broke up with a broke man”. let’s just kill all the undesirables then instead of just letting them suffer since if they can’t get it together or”grow up” since they weren’t offered the same opportunities in life or given the same tools to work with, because i know for a fucking fact if i can’t find someone who loves me when i was at my lowest an still trying why they fuck would i want someone who could only love me at my best. i paid for everything and loved him very very much…then one day i found out he was cheating on me and i told myself never ever again will i let anyone use me. “this signals that he may not see you as an equal”. i knew about his financial status when we started dating and i was not happy since he didn’t even have a car and couldn’t drive. “a man’s work ethic is a reflection of his character,” says jennine estes, m. am a graduate and have been living with my boyfriend who is a houseboy for 6 years. i helped my ex get a new job where he could make more money. good to know that there are woman out there that would give me a chance☺. i just hate always giving and giving and it not be reciprocated. there’s a conflict here; i feel compelled to leave to find gainful employment that will not only pay the bills but help me to feel fulfilled as a person, or choose to stay with my fiance at the cost of being poor and a burden to our relationship. an age were women are fighting for equal pay and a whole host of other things this really was a sad article to read……. basically says that a woman is incapable of loving men i’m any meaningful way, because women are incapible of unconditional love…. in my own failed relationship, i tried everything i could to keep her happy, but half the time i was working in the dark with no guidance. that the gender pay balance is evening up we have to be less traditional about who ought to be the breadwinner, and be rid of this idea that a woman does not need to contribute financially, but the man always must. he could be working at mcdonald’s, but he is bringing home something. im late on my period, 10 days now, hoping is just that a simple delay…. being a “kept” man or woman is ok if you both agree to that because you both are getting out of it what you need. you need to see action and within some sort of deadline. in addition, i have a partner who is not perfect, but i’m trying to decide where the line should be drawn.’ve never been one to focus on money — my own or someone else’s — or see it as a path to happiness. i always got a hard time from other women for accepting him with all these flaws in their book. at least you’re not unemployed, working a temp job, or working part time. nothing but sea robins and spidercrabs in that murky water. i had one love but sjed fast realised and i guess my replacement pointed out how little i earnt and now women over thd net dont wang to mnow men like myself..and most of these poor people have a bright future ahead trust me…just have a little patience. while everyone likes a good deal, real men will not make this known when courting a woman. i do want to help him achieve more in life but i don’t know how much is too much. have never in my life attempted to insult someone for being less educated than myself, however i am pretty sure if i was trying, i would spell stuff right myself. there isn’t a right or wrong, but all of us know what we want and what we attract. you’re starting to resent him over money issues, or his lack thereof. we discussed finances face to face, and i found out he had about 0 unaccounted for each month. currently in a relationship, we’ve been together for a year already, and im going to be honest here. so that is the first thing i found out very young, even poor boys did not want to “marry” me. how long a grace period should one person give another? i met someone online, we had a lot in common and messages back and forth were funny, full of great conversation, really good stuff. this category of people will capitalize on anything they can to achieve success and being poor is a great motivator. i also told him about chapter 13 bk but he’s not interested. to clarify, i’m not asking him to make more than me or even as much as me. i did not realise or understand the importance of a good education and job until to late and after my last girlfriend dumpingrme because of money issues i am close to giving up all together. note that when i state my opnion, i will not put down anyone else for thier opnion. wealthy women want to marry a man who is equal (except for some wealthy women who look for a man who’s younger and hotter in which case, duh). i work 50+hrs a week at the best job i’m capable of doing, do as many odd jobs for cash as i can find, barely see my kids other than just in time for bedtime, and
No Money, No Honey: Unemployed Men Are Deal Breakers for i have no debt, with education debt completely paid off last year. a man who knows how to take care of himself—and cares enough to make the effort to do so – will be far more inclined to step-up and take care of you than someone who just expects you to live according to his low standards or act as a full time maid-service. you marry a man who made less money than you? if he can’t pay the check when you go out, no big deal if you can. it’s a different mindset; instead of “i’m not …,” it’s “i’m good at …” despite the things you think are bad in your life, there’s also a lot of good — can you acknowledge them? at the same time, it might be beneficial if you geared your dating efforts at women for whom a disability wouldn’t be an issue. both of you need to sit down and talk hardcore, and honestly about how you feel about everything. if you loan him money for a business, what is his plan to pay you back (and is it a viable business, and is he a good businessman)? this: 5 phrases every smart woman needs in her vocabulary, stat!, i think that you forget to see/say that many men put more money to keep sexually satisfied. men let’s be men and take care of our women, and women fight for your man it will make him fight for what you want. the real problem is that no one knows how to be content with nothing, or more specifically, what they have. i know many women in long-term marriages who did not look down on their husbands during the great recession and he lost his job (or had it significantly reduced). i am a professional women with 2 children and not receiving any regular child support.’m sorry but there are people who spent years struggling through school and sleepless nights awake studying; people who worked their hardest to make sure they had enough to support their children and buy a home one day. we have forgotten that we want to be able to mix genes with this person. grab some cool snacks and pop at the grocery store, put on comfy pjs, and cuddle with him on the couch to some netflix or hulu., no you are not a bad person for not wanting that kind of situation and are wise to consider walking away. now, we met through a friend & we became friends as a result. ive known him for 5 years, but we have been together for 3. the strategy therefore shifts to men who provide stability, are good fathers, etc. a woman will never ever ever respect a man who always has his hands out. because procreation & coupling is a team effort… otherwise we would be asexual no?, based on the responces women have given here today – you might as well be credited as coauthors in a red pill publication. first, i guess my worry is similar to that to others on this board, that i’ll be taking care of us and it scares me a little. well, let’s just say they likely aren’t getting many accolades on the other side, either. (currently the world is full of them so if you are a single women the odds are with you. this man was a handy man and would make a little cash once a month. of the story for the guys appears to be : earn good money and keep it by your side so you can appear ‘wealthy’ to women at all times. he then proceeded to live on my dine for about 9 months. he does have children and i don’t help with them for anything if they need something he figures it out and figures out how to get it sometimes i’m a little jealous of that because if you can figure out to get things for them why can’t he figure out how to get things for me. agree with janet, i’ll act a fool, been with mine 3years he can’t keep a job either, i already see how he do with my car ain’t no way in hell i’m moving n with him sitting down relating an i been busting my ass. “it’s important to have alone time, friend time, and hobbies outside of the relationship to allow partners to be excited to come back together and share their stories,” says estes. i started working at another job where i was making enough $$ to pay the full rent. women would be at work making the big bucks and making all the important descisions to ensure everything runs smoothly and men would be either………. us real working women don’t have time for someone as selfish as yourself. mean it’s not like he doesn’t have a job. those same women are looking for brains and interest in the world.) and have the same sort of freedom men do (yeah, we like time by ourselves or with our friends, too). she left the north american continent and me for her home country of japan where she quickly found a job selling medications to doctors. we are wired to be the head of the pack, which means that a woman will find it hard to feel attraction for you (even if you are brad pitt) if you are below her in the pack. i found out my hubby didn’t buy that house; he inherited it and it wasn’t even payed off; the mortgage had only been 7 and automatically deducted! now, i have decided that at the age of 54, i’m going to semi retire and start enjoying life before i’m 70. your pseudo-husband is the government, which gives you all kinds of goodies because you’re still classified as a weak minority (e. now i’m back in the dating pool i want to stay true to who i am and keep my take as i find attitude but dealing with this has me wondering if there’s some truth in articles like this. yet, when she started making the money, while i was still a broke college student, she quickly forgot how i resisted what other people said or thought about my choices (about her: to be more clear, friends would say: “dude, she’s fucking ugly,” or “you can do way better than that” or strangers would simply look at us weird when they saw us holding hands in public, because we just did not make a good match in the eyes of the society (mainly because she was ugly as fuck compared to me! yes, he is a pretty great guy, for the most part. they’re very much to blame why many of us good men are still single today, and there is no reason why we should take the blame since many of us men are not single by choice. but it amazes me how women (broke or not) can make it alone somehow. if a man is not able to acquire the info he needs to make a sound judgement on who he considering marrying, he is going to pass on that marriage. we have great chemistry, mind blowing sex but honestly, its not enough. at the moment i am working my wits out to progress in my career, i have tried jumpstarting a business for him, but still he shows no interest. i love being that mysteriously single woman in the room. not too broke to have a bustling social musician’s nightlife, however…. confidence is very important and anyone wishing their life to be over may have some more serious issues than just a low income. we were planning to get married but i’m not sure . johns, brians, daniels… (and to a degree ragnok & adam & messenger… though these 3 are bitter & i dont exactly agree with their views 100%, but i understand how they can choose to see it that way) those are the men. not only this but the man will also start to feel unworthy because he is failing to live up to expectations, to himself and to his lover. they just calculate their earnings & report a singular profit & then distribute it. my relationship with a broke, long term unemployed man who lives with his mother has just ended. get out a find a broken man and become the woman you are ment to be! if he truly cares about you, his good behaviors will grow stronger. there will always be someone younger, faster, richer, and more attractive than you. i’m in a serious relationship with a man for over 5 years now, love him very much, he’s perfect for me in many ways but his business is doing poorly and he’s completely broke even having to sell his house very soon. rich manipulation of the laws will force you to stay in your place and will destroy you and your efforts if you happen to step too far out of line, forces that you can never compete against if you’re not already one of “them”. not some selfish whore that needs a man to live her life for her. if you’re attracted to him and you think there’s enough “there” there, it’s certainly ok to ask him what his plans are to get on more stable financial footing especially if you are not in a situation to support someone (or choose not to). ok so he is my question … i deftly make more than my man. have my own house living and supporting my two boys and 3 animals that i love very much. he has no kids, his own home (which is a bit of a fixer upper), he’s 39 (i’m 29) handsome and well dressed and no debt. i never want to have to support someone financially again..Like sometimes my friends invite me to some places to hang out and always let me know that i could invite him too, but i just dont… cz i know that he wont have money to pay for a single drink even tho he is currently working what he gets its not enough for him, cz he pays rent and i dont cz i still live with my folks, and he everyday buys food and dinner, but is not really a good feeling… and on top of this……. i’m ok being a woman who makes more than her man. but i think there is something to be said for the young couple that makes their fortune together. this went on and only became worse after i failed to graduate the semester that i had planned on graduating.’m not sure many — any — boys get the same message, and even in this presumably enlightened age, i just can’t see a parent encouraging a son to “marry up. he doesn’t and hasn’t gave me money for bills he’s always saying oh when i’m done with my paying my stuff i’ll give you money for bills ..One need to look at the priorities of the guy. i have a full time job and go to school and have a 5 year old daughter. what i’m hearing from you is that you didn’t mind supporting “john” as long as he was appreciative, and he wasn’t. this point i’m not sure if i should feel bad for everyone who has to be around you or if i should feel sorry for you because you’re obviously so miserable you seek joy out of trying to bring others down with you. i would have to agree with the article above and say that is is a very important factor to me. some people can’t afford to go to school without some form of help, and that’s if they can get some. i have used sexuality, i have refused sexual relations until a solid relationship, i have worked every angle. if i can make a different woman cry everyday just by saying “thank you” i’d finally feel like i’d really given back to my community. she’ll get excited and answer my question, but before she can ask me a question (which would be her way of expressing interest)i quickly say “thank you”, then i turn around and swiftly walk away and never look back. can’t men be more than that; can they not bring home an income and be wonderful caregivers for their kids? i just hate always giving and giving and it not be reciprocated. find a woman who wants you to be the breadwinner and provider, and wants to be what you want her to be, and go have a happy life. in such couples, surveys show, both wife and husband generally report being less happy about the marriage. and i’m not opposed to weed especially in washington where it’s legal, but i see it like this: he’s a man in his thirties and im a woman in my twenties. my earnings keep growing and all of you whores keep getting older, fatter and somehow more selfish. we know players but if you’re constantly looking for the game in a person…you’re possibly missing out on the heart of the true person. i thought in marriage you take a vow to love someone for rich or poor? while studies have shown that low-income women value marriage and have more traditional views about marriage and divorce than others, they don’t want to get hitched to a man who is going to drag them down. recent study seems to indicate that we are stuck in a time warp when it comes to gender and money — we can’t get past the idea that a husband should make more money than his wife, and that is impacting whom we marry, how much a wife works, and even if a couple stays married. as a (shadow of a) man, the thought never even occurred to me that being expected to pay for everything was perhaps not right. i had a man live with me in my home that started charging me for everything he did, so that he would not have to contribute to the bills. listen, i do not mind dating a man who has a job that makes less than me. with that said, there is no denying that, because of this, there is (and will be) more men who will not want to marry in fear of divorce and of a growing presence of emasculation. he worked for many years until he couldn`t any more. trouble is, there are barely any women out there who would want to be with someone like me, especially considering that i’m not particularly attractive physically (no one – at least no one i have liked – has ever found me handsome or hot in the least). he said that he loves me but he couldn’t provide for me and my son and that i deserve better. if only more women (and maybe even men) would think this way…. but i have realized that if i don’t ask for my bank card back he “forgets” to give it to me and while he has it, he uses it without asking for my permission. nothing is stopping you or any other man from having that reality. i wholeheartedly agree that his lack of spirituality and your devotion to it is a painful issue, but again, time for some hard core sit down talking with him. but for the 1st time in your life you feel that this could be your soul mate. if my boyfriend was unemployed (temporarily hopefully) then he needs to pick up the slack at home. i don’t mind that his idea of travel is going to the corner shop or that fun for him means sitting in the street corner with a bunch of friends who cannot even tell you what the fiscus or gdp are. it really is all about both parties being equal, and the drive to do better for yourself. like some woman out there scorned you…the very idea that you think countless women are unable to go about their lives happily because you haven’t asked them out is laughable…for every one good looking guy out there, there’s a million others who are not only good looking but who most likely aren’t as shallow as you either. if you want to be the “provider, bread winner, protector” then go ahead and do it; find a woman who wants that in a man (and not one who wants “supremacy over a household”) — those women exist — find a job that will support that and have at it. would i want a penniless man to come along and stuff all that up? does it mean to be a good mom when mommy works? and as a result, their view on a man with limited means is that of a leech & not of… a man, with limited means. i definitely get what you’re saying, i think looking back on it, it’s not so much that i’m not smart i think it’s that i lack the courage to potentially fail at something, which i believe rolls back to the social anxiety aspect of things. i wanted to quit but i could not depend on him to support us until i found something and that really sucked. if you see someone who is greedy, then it reflects in someone who wants someone who will look for someone who has a lot of money. i understand that men often equate their self-worth with their actual worth, and if he’s been looking for work and can’t find it, he may be depressed; we all would be! does the lion have to bow before the lionesses because they killed the springbok? they took something they have no interest in and published it how they would like it even though they weren’t buying the product they are selling. he says he will pay me back, but honestly, i’m not holding my breath. find a good man whose willing to get his hands dirty and provide and be confident in doing so. believe in traditional roles and the fact that they have value, there is a purpose and they have worked since the beginning of time. i can enjoy shallow pursuits such as shopping and caring for my looks. they’re the ones that cause that gnawing feeling in your gut and leave you wondering if the situation is workable or if it’s time to walk. he has no interest in looking for a job and even if he did he would probably not earn much. want to be honest with you and tell you that this man is a “user”. also hates my charity – makes him feel guilty about not being able to provide yet he has no means to provide so whut m8? equally so, i grimace learning about her pathetic corporate situation and emptiness, but that’s another story. sometimes yes but for the most part, no (remember, women ask for divorce two-thirds of the time). this obviously would not ensure food on the table & a roof over ones head, but that is because the pursuit of living life is the pursuit of putting food on the table & a roof over the head & as such, it was a given that regardless of the man you chose, these would be his preoccupations when he was not with you. i have patience but when it wears thin thats not good. i read another article about how women hate it when men always go on about money and keep tabs on how much is spent. you can make good money but still struggle with debt, you can make crap money and have no debt at all; hell some people are high school grads and make better money than those with bachelors degrees. when he did have a bit of money he never took me on a date or showed me he appricated me. you were worth millions, but didn’t have the brains to stick money in securities or at the very least a 401k for retirement? back up a bit…before that time, you want to be alone in a possible retirement? i am not going to lecture you here about my views, since persuading such a perspective is ever rarely listened to, however i will say that it is true that women are able to rise to sky in every financial facet and are now capable of showing supremacy over a household. think some of the guys are getting the wrong message that women only care about money when looking for potential marriage partners. women today, are out college’ing, out jobing, out earning and out doing men in every arena…they literally buy men, like pets, many whom are perfectly content to stay home and raise kids, like a woman. if you don’t have that, the relationship will not work even if he’s a millionaire. i don’t even no how much longer i can put up with it because i don’t know if its normal for a man to be down that long. so, look in the mirror first and figure out what you want; if it’s youth and beauty, great. to make matters worse, the transporter sometimes brings his girlfriend with the expectation that i will cover everyone’s bill. your saving and investments somehow protected from another huge scandal that steals it all away? i know that is old fashioned, and that by no means is set in stone, but i never saw that as a bad thing until i started reading this, (and countless like it) and seeing that the same view is overwhelmingly not shared by women. some of us are dying inside and want nothing but to do better in a world that seems cursed at times. women’s motives arent anymore mysterious then that of the most common of street hookers. why a man want with a woman who feel it’s right. in fact i am hesitant to ask girls out not because i’m insecure or unattractive, which i am definately not, but because i can already envision the future where i will cause pain in this potential gf because it is not natural for a man not to be able to care of his woman. i had made it clear in my profile that i wanted to meet someone with whom i could purchase a home so that i can run my home-based business efficiently (divorce put paid to that, but i could go half on a suitable place).’m am a financially secure widow with a good job, home, and two children. if my partner makes more, for me, it can only be a good thing., i still love you bitch, but i would’nt get back with you…even if you begged me to…even if i was starving and did need your financial support, which by the way you never gave me, though you acted like you did. what this, and so many articles have made exceeding clear is that there is no hope for me or other men like me.. don’t lower your standards for someone who doesn’t appreciate and love you for you. grow old together and be happy no matter where you are. you can imagine (by the mere fact that i am commenting on & was therefore reading this article) i am not the richest guy in the world. the alternative is waking up one day down the road divorced with five kids and fifty thousand dollars in debt, watching re-runs of "honey boo boo" on nick at nite. will always have opinions…my advice to you is…don’t try to see something that’s not there but also don’t ignore something that’s there. no one gives a crap about single dad’s with kids, and employers certainly don’t understand or care. at that time, i had a steady girlfriend of over a year, and never had trouble with women before. but men who are constantly suggesting that they want to just stay in and watch a movie early on in the dating game are likely the lazy type, or only out for sex. it’s workable: if your man has recently changed directions, graduated school or been laid off, give him a break. is there a plan in place to become more equal partners (if you want that)? do it for the community, do it because its right and do it because its fun. both men and women want their partners to do their fair share whether it’s financially or help around the house, etc. ive known him for 5 years, but we have been together for 3. then again there are so many career women nowadays that are so very independent, selfish, very spoiled and greedy as well since they will never go with a man that makes much less money than they do since many of the women nowadays really want the best and will never settle for less.. no matter how much u make or who u might date does it’s about being happy and if she is unhappy all because u might not fit her needs then tell her to go find someone else. those men finally realised that money doesn’t impress me, and are now left to look for a woman who loves money. basically if you’re making money and your partner is trying to contribute, and is a good person, then they deserve a chance, because you never know when you might get demoted and your partner finds something better. we have forgotten what it means to bind our fate to each other & to strive to make that joint fate the best it can be. i am having to settle for a ring that is less than i want because he can’t get his shit together and get a real job. so i thought, ok he’s a manager, has to make at least as much as i do, right? he is retired from what seems to be a good career- no, i didn’t ask him why he doesn’t have a bean. i don’t know whether or not he was drinking it, partying it, or spending it on women,but i knew i grew so tired of paying for rent, groceries, utilities, dates while holding down a career and watching him live it up that i separated from him last summer, telling him i need to see him achieve on his own without my support before we can continue. he would tell strangers i am a millionaire etc, all really embarrassing… i am not, i have a good lot of assets, (family inheritance put towards property which massively increased in value) but cash wise, income wise i am very average. i took an extra job to make up for the loans and he is too good to go wait tables? women like you will love for what is in the hands not what is in the heart and see how the man can contribute to the life of the couple independently of money. his debt is irs (nearly 20k), a cadillac at 0 / mo which he can’t afford, and odds and ends credit cards. hate to say it, but i can’t help but to agree, although i would never use such strong and demeaning words. a home cooked meal every single night makes for a relationship that will likely feel unbalanced in the long run. in the face of today's tough economy and high unemployment rate, a new study revealed that it is still no excuse: in dating, unemployment is a deal breaker, particularly for straight women. beautiful bible verses for every woman in need of love, reassurance and strength. we are far more like feudal europe where if your not born into it, you aren’t gonna get it., i’m not saying i agree with this jaded philosophy – because i think a lot of it is social conditioning. meanwhile met a wonderful man that’s helpful,kind,mindful. they also have a right to look for someone who is headed down the same path as them…i am not a selfish whore who is incapable of love because i refuse to date someone who is expecting me to financially support them. now we act like you and stop loving women and then you consoling where all the good men have gone. want a materialistic game, you have it, and please do not complain about it, because they are just your rules. is right in a way, if a women keeps taking care of him regardless of how much faith he might have, he may never grow up. i have a bit more time before retirement than you, but don’t expect to ever be able to. i just lost my job a few months ago that when i do start making money again i’m going to start telling women i’m broke . you want a rich asshole that is cold and uncaring, who treats you like trash, or doesn’t treat you like anything at all? you’ll take at your current station because that’s all you can do, and heaven forbid you settle for less, and they’ll stay for the same reason.. the basic fear of the actual going into a campus and meeting all the people etc which social anxiety so cruelly makes out to be much worse than it is. get him to understand in the framework of a recipie.) if you’re tired of collecting frequent flyer miles to the purgatory between stay and go, you’re in luck. speaking i have a plan underway, an entrepreneurial venture, completely separate from my precarious day work. all that is great for academics, economists and media pundits. what do you want — a dependent woman who’ll marry anyone who can support her or an independent woman who seeks a good man not for his wealth but for who he is?"while my heart goes out to people who are unemployed or under-employed in this economy," said another woman, carole bartholomeaux, in the press release. now i am so stressed and just dont know what to do. he likes being a cook, and has no desire to change that. i noticed your tone started to become more aggressive the more i read on. no one cares as much as you read genesis in the bible maybe you’ll feel better about your role as a man. broke men offer the emotional support to women needed to cut it in a male dominated workforce. meanwhile the shreds of human men left will become prominent once again if the world ever goes to shit and we’ll be back to 2000 years ago and you’ll be back to scrubbing pots. is why you will hear far less men leveraging such complaints towards a broke woman – even in a world where female breadwinners are fast becoming the norm. guy, great guy, whatever guy doesn’t mean he’s the guy for you. if you are out of money, you are classified as a threat and they will actually black list you for fun. “building a career shows an ability to commit, work through difficulties, and showcases a development of people skills. have to stop feeling sorry for these men and trying to take care of them and fix them. if you let her spend your money carelesslt by being too ‘laid back and nice’ you will one day be broke and she will leave you, no matter how caring or nice a personality you’ve got, since earning a lesser wage obviously makes you ‘immature’ and ‘not marriage material’. am 24 now and i am trying to turn my life around, i have been in the same job since i was 21 (however after chatting to a few of the people there they are known for underpaying), i have lost a lot of weight and am really trying to get in shape, i bought a car and have got my learners and am working towards getting my license, and when i get my p’s i want to move out of home, i don’t think i’d be able to afford my own place at the moment, maybe a flat, so i’d probably be looking at a share place for now. i loved the hell out of my man and supported him financially like marato is doing. it’s not about the pay check but what their view on money is.” and “yes, i would be more than happy because dating is a partnership regardless of your income or problems. he held temporary job after temp job, until finally working at a call center, but he was still always broke. like the greatest battle plans, everything falls apart as soon as it encounters the real world. change sucks, and the older men get, the more change hurts, even when we want to. that same beta though will kill that alpha and take by force his possessions and women if the alpha ever shows a hint of weakness. i had lost my job at one time too, but these men have just made so many bad decisions that they think will never come back to bite them. the legal system is shaped by those that “had” in the past, and have the purchasing power to keep buying the laws to stay in their favor and prevent anyone else from replacing them. men appreciate it when its not given to them so easy……another thing that bothers me that i have been reading in this comment section. i love him very much and i’ve never ever met a kinder and more thoughtful person. most times are spent at my house or doing free stuff. it was then that i realized that i have nothing to offer anyone in a relationship. its cheaper and they will love you just as much as a wife or girlfriend without the drama and emotional baggage. i do have a stable job, i earn less than the average salary but i have a stable full time job.’ve spent the last twelve years on the same path in the same order, although i had to move my father out a couple of years ago. one can argue that people need to be able to support themselves. he knows he messed up and i’ve made spreadsheets for him (i work in finance) to show him how dire his situation is… and no, he knows i won’t give him money..but the relationship had been this way for nearly 14 yrs. if you need more from him — money or support, whatever — you need to have an honest, loving talk with him and set up some healthy boundaries so you don’t feel used. at no point do we see a relationship between a harworking woman that supports her husband that stays home and looks after the children. men, if you can’t get rich right away, if you’re not born with a silver spoon in your mouth, or are blessed with exceptionally good looks, either have your genitals removed to completely eliminate any desire for a woman, or just eat a bullet. i have kept my age well due to 49 years of uninterrupted sleep and for selfishly guarding my fertility until the right provider might appear. what makes me more miserable, is the fact that i need someone who can support me in my spiritual life, pray and fast together, support each others careers irrespective of our current levels. supporting oneself, i believe, is one of the duties of being a responsible adult – whatever your gender or profession/passion. as much as taking out loans irritated me (& killed my credit) now, as a rebel, i dont take shit. ive lived in some horrid places in my 20s, but this, this takes the cake. he didn’t, i am childfree forever and i have no regrets.’m sure i’m not the only girl growing up whose mother told her that it’s just as easy to love a rich guy as it is to love a poor one. if she doesn’t want to have sex with you anymore, she probably has a hard time loving you either…). i just want to see some kind of determination to better himself in any way, which i have not. i had to really struggle to get my home, and succeed at work, and i do not want to be in a position where a roof over my head is at risk. i earn more than every man i’ve ever dated. where, in my reply did i imply such a thing, nor did the quote you took out, have a suggestive manner to that. they can’t fix their broken down cars, they can’t afford a place to live anymore, etc. i love my kids, all of them, but if it weren’t for them, i think i’d just wander “hunting” into a woods somewhere, and never come back out..down the pub getting pissed, around at their mates laughing and joking or at a formula one race…. a long time, i ignored my own feelings and made myself believe that many of the things he said were gospel. a man should either work or be looking for work period. though it seems i’m not of value until i return to my previous earning power, where a woman can say “look mom he’s a good guy. she wouldn’t tell me anything that i could work with or understand. maybe she’s smarter than me or works harder than me which is very attractive to me, and i feel like being with her will challenge me to become better (even if i never match her level because she’s more talented or something, i would feel proud of her and feel lucky to be with her). sure, women use age-defying cosmetics and procedures more then men do (but men are just as vain about that stuff) — not necessarily because of their love lives, but their careers. family/relationship equation: it’s important to remember that every family has a different set of values and boundaries, but your guy needs to know where his childhood ends and adulthood begins., if you wanted to date someone capable of loving you unconditionally, regardless of how much you earned, you should have married a man instead. and i understand how a great person with a great personality can mismanage money (been there, done that); again, you can’t solve that problem for him but you can support whatever efforts he makes toward making it better. they need to be distinguished from a poor but kind, helpful and genuinely loving guy who will do way more at home and for the kids than any other man will and stay by your side no matter what, getting wrinkly, depressed, sick, or simply old. well everyone “says” they will, but when the chips are down, its a fact that a man is more likely to leave a disabled woman than the other way around. he’s been incredibly supportive of me through my education and with my struggles with a few health problems, he does most of the house work, and he’s even going to take time off with our baby were expecting. he knows he couldn’t get a stable job because of his situation but he spends whatever he earns without thinking where would his next salary come from. he might not be as successful as you’d like, but you’ll know by the attempts, but don’t make him do everything, you have to give toward him as well and become at least a little more of what he needs of you as well. and when he did finally go back home i did not hear from him again until he was ready to see me again. life motto: “if something’s broken, fix it, don’t go crying in a corner. survey revealed that almost two out of every three men are open to dating a woman without a job with 19 percent saying that there was no problem at all and 46 percent saying that they would but was also interested in knowing how the women spent their time. i’m not saying throw everything you have away, one must always be as responsible as possible, but don’t let money fears corrupt your feelings. yeah, right you do, but often not until it’s too late. such a relationship is doomed to fail from the beginning, this is why i am focusing all my efforts into improving my financial situation right now (even though i’m very not greedy), before even thinking about dating, because i couldn’t look myself in the mirror if i was in a relationship and not being able to express my alpha self, because, that is my true self, i would just feel like a faker and a taker, but not giving anything back. be damn grateful you aren’t in a cardboard box hungry and sick somewhere.%) of women don’t want to date men shorter then them. and just by you being on this site i know you want to justify making a decision that you know isn’t right as a human.” because the more articles i read on this, i see more of the former than the later, which is what i am personally, and it makes me feel sad we have gone this way. if you disagree, are a single man, around 50, and want to prove me wrong, by all means, lets hear from you and how you are successful and married down. there is a difference between loving sports and having a childish obsession with them. all that’s left now is i want to build a personal empire. a relationship to work, in the eyes of a greedy and selfish woman, the man must contribute more then the greedy and selfish woman. but now i daught he loves me cs he doesn’t listen or take take what i advise him with in practice he sleeps the whole day he just eat and sleep i just want the advise to knw if is he commited to dis relationship or not cs he doesnt help me with household either i have to come back to wrk at 8pm and cook he eats after want sex and sleep a hardly gets rest if i try to tell him he just laugh and tell me he will look for thr job next month even if i give him firections he says i dont knw the place it seems like he wants me to bby seat him. after we started dating the requests for loans, electronic fund transfers, “help me pay this bill because i currently don’t have access to the internet” started coming.), and look for situations that slowly stretch your anxiety so that it’s less anxious. we are a team, one not defined or categorized by dogmatic social biases. this whole money versus not isn’t just a social standard in dating it’s almost like a new class level. now if i ever date i will ask about finances first. every man and woman is relationship or marriage material no matter what their life station is, and has nothing whatsoever to do with money and earning power. that isn’t proof about how far we haven’t come as a society, i don’t know what is. only the heavens know how he plans on getting me all of that. a man can’t provide financially, he needs to find purpose and motivation to get earning. dont get me wrong, im not a mean person & i am about to back my species up here on why women need to rethink this love vs money thing, but let us separate the men from the boys… the men that got supported by their women & leaned on them & used them & sat infront of the tv & slouched & drank their money & drove their cars & whined & settled… those are the losers. if you’ve gotten this far through the comments to read my story, and you’re struggling with a poor partner, remember that we’re not all lazy gold digging leeches. you can say you’d like to split things equally as you date to see if you’re truly good romantic partners (and there are many inexpensive/free ways to be together). you can fight and fail, you can do nothing and succeed. those same perpetually rich betas over hundreds and thousands of years have used greed as a tool to shape all others into a mentality to accumulate more “stuff”, to spend and consume, and what’s worse, to actually judge your own personal value or that of others on the crap you or they have, or what or they have done. so when you say women are whores remember your mum is a woman. this summer, a study (ok, funded by a credit report agency so i take it with a grain of salt) indicated financial responsibility and financial compatibility was more important or just as important as career ambition, physical attraction and sex and intimacy, especially for women. guy that i just threw out was great and terrific, according to him, prior to us meeting.” may i mention that he doesn’t/didn’t have his own place (he does pay bills/rent there but it sucks bc we had no privacy)? sometimes he does clean up and mowes the grass, but he hardly spends time with my daughter, doesn’t spend money on her or me. calling it quits shouldn’t even be a thought because of money and finances if, in your own words, he’s a good father and a loving, caring man to you. i divorced him and have never been so happy, even though i raise two kids on a small social services salary. i’d rather hear him tell me how much he loves me and how he only has eyes for me. a man(or woman) that can only afford an occasional bowl of soup at the local grill is hard on the spouse..if we go places i pay for them, if he and i go on dates i pay for it 95% of the time bc he doesnt make enough. you are boxing all men into a narrow view of masculinity: provider, breadwinner, protector, what you call “natural.)) sad that in the modern age this is solely determined by the money in your pocket because plenty of us broke guys would be strong providers/protectors on another planet, but yet this is the reality we live in. with the little that we have, i have always assured him if he starts his college education little by little we shall manage, but till to date he shows no interest in going back to college. i sometimes resent him because i feel i do more than 50%. it’s workable: “it’s a good sign when your guy can set boundaries and is open to having conversations about your feelings while making you feel like a priority,” says estes., it isn’t your “responsibility” to pay for any other person unless you birthed/adopted him or her, or you vowed that in a marriage (and even then it’s not a given, given certain circumstances). i am going to be paying for the entire wedding, rehearsal dinner, honeymoon, wedding rings… everything else! if you are unemployed your job is to find a job, that’s what a real man does. you might expand to somebody a little older or financially secure. i observe that many women indicate that they want a man who makes a decent living, regardless of his other traits. i hope what i wrote was not a “he doesn’t earn much so he ain’t worth your time, dump him! as a man you must always recognize that no matter what a woman says or does she does not love you. it’s important to have an identity and individuality when in a relationship. i possibly could have dealt with no 3, but really, no. you must also not have any kids as i don’t really feel like raising another man’s offspring. if you are a man dont bother looking for love from a woman they just want your money even if they have their own., under-employed and low-income men are just not good dating or marriage material in the eyes of many women. short, tall, thin, a few extra, any race, doesn’t bother me. per hour working part time/24 hrs per week as security officer in a downtown san francisco high rise. you bale on an otherwise loving relationship for anything that has even the slightest hint of a money issue, do don’t deserve the air you breath. in 15 years, women are projected not just to close the income gap with men—but to reverse it and out-earn men on average. life of his own/relationship equation: i’m obviously not suggesting that every woman start loving the idea of a costa rican bachelor party blow-out (sorry, gentlemen, i know too much), but imagine never having time to unwind with your girls over a bottle of wine or take that trip to the ultimate spa retreat with your bestie?. he knows how to cook and clean (at least the basics)., because i was raised to be polite and not ignore people, i would like to know how to turn him down without coming across like an awful person. once a man realizes this fact of nature everything women do begins to make perfect sense. thank you so much for proving that at least one woman can see and understand what so many men are screaming. really, no one wants to go back to the days when women had to marry for financial security. hell, we even killed each other for you (which, in hindsight… was just stupid). i don’t expect a rich man, but i do want a guy with a solid work ethic. cause this isn’t fair, it’s not love and us real working women need a soft place to land too. the man refuses to work or only works part time then the woman may feel like she puts in more effort. not marry a man who cannot take care of himself. i’m under-employed, putting what little money i have from part-time work into rent, bills, and occasional grad-school tuition. dated a man who also owed back taxes and etc.. it seems that those who have some sort of intelligence and ability to think ahead can value the importance of financial stability. the way people approach money is very important, especially as we age and especially if we have kids. now at 30, i still have little debt, a unusable degree, a far lower paying job, and trying to start over. so he went back to the pond behind my back and decided to meet a poor woman with a poor background like him.
Am I Being Too Materialistic By Giving Up on a Financially Unstable
not be with a good hearted man who earns a good living? he said his mum knows how he feels about me but is against the long distance relationship being that we are both miserable missing each other and crying when we skype. i basically forced him to get a job at a place where i had just gotten a job at. our constant spending and consuming is what keeps them where they are for generations without count. you provide him with sex & he pays for your lifestyle?”) but that has nothing to do with dating a broke man; that is more about someone’s character. you’re closing in on retirement, and your worried about your “good man” who apparently sucks trying to manage money? "i will not have a relationship with someone whom i need to support. am a successful business woman who has her own money, car, etc. i also have no problem paying for myself on a date or treating him from time to time. forgive me for going “bible” here, but it’s a great example. he cares about people and i know he feels awful. he has acquired a reliable full time job with a decent salary (above entry level). read as many books as you can get your hands on. women have become highly motivated because they have been left holding the bag in broken marriages and out of necessity in providing for their children have become “the man” so gloria steinem was succesful in not only destroying the family unit but turning genders upside down and reversing their true roles and nature. i’m forced off the beaten path because it’s crowded. everything seemed to be working out fine & we populated the world. it has to be both, willing to give all, for the sake of the other in love. he works very hard, but is barely getting by, and it worries me. after all… sneeky could pay thoughtful for his poem & give it to the women that thoughtful wrote it for. soon this imbalance became wielded as power & before long the “i can afford more therefore i am better than you” status quo began taking hold. feel being alone is better than having underlying feelings of uncertainty and sadness or doubt. for those not familiar with this paradigm, it would be wise to take a step back and give this some thought…yes, times have changed either for the better or for worse, but there is no denying there is a gender role struggle. don’t think you making a mistake because he actually try to have a better income just haven’t find a job yet but when one open up , he be ready now if he didn’t have a career field yes . he may still be a “great guy” or he may not. you date a guy who makes a decent living (he can afford his own bills, put money aside, and have money left over for fun) even if he despised his work and had zero ambition to find another job or get a promotion? “is a man who provides for his kids and protects them in non-economic ways less of a man? it’s one thing when you’re in your twenties, but it’s another when you’re looking at retiring with someone. you see, in my experience… even though women are not money grubbing whores… they have lost their way in the pursuit of feminism. i got told i should be aiming for a man that will pay my bills whether he lived with me or not, had a car and a place and paid for all dates. stay strong, good luck, and please let me know how it goes. we men are nothing more than a means to an end apparently, and when we are no longer useful, and every last ounce of strength and ability to make money is used up, out you go. a man’s money or lack thereof was never a big thought of mine bc ive always been independent. if he can’t, these are important factors to consider,” says estes. do they care if you are smart & handsome & loving & romantic & desire them & a good lover & a man of honour & character & that you will potentially change the world? despite warning signs and his lack of money, i have fallen for him. he lost his long time job right as we got together and he didnt seem too interested in getting another job. looking for a wife and child to make you happy. of course it's not uncommon for people looking for a relationship to keep a mental checklist of qualities required of their potential lovers, but a recent survey revealed that a whopping 75 percent of straight women had problems with dating an unemployed man. i have spent so much on him and it makes him sad that can’t afford to treat me and take me out and that he owes me a lot. you ever thought how strong an individual must be to become the platform for everyone aspiring to put a roof over their head or food on the table? all humans, no matter what past or where they come from, what thier race, gender, social/econmic/political satus is, are worthy of love. also, a good source of support has been a book i recently read by david deida called the way of the superior man. i’m exactly like your guy, trapped in a bust my butt for nothing job, but it’s the best i can do situation, left high and dry with 4 kids by their mom and a ton of her debt, so she could go chase a guy with more money and no kids, out of the country to avoid childsupport. sure call girls arent baggage free, but they have to carry that baggage for themselves. everything a women would want except i don’t spend, not until i have a stable job and stable cash flow. suppose i have experienced many of the examples, i have supported a man and was taken advantage of, i have shared in the financial responsibilities, but really did not feel like i was being treated like a lady, only a partner. so yes a women can date and support a man who is unemployed but it’s never worth the while or the time when he is going to be selfish and not try to repay the favors. i too have found myself paying for almost everything if we go out etc. if there’s too great a mismatch, or one develops, one or the other will check out as soon as something better and obtainable comes along. rest of the time i work out, if i where to work i would make minimum wage at this point and it would be more of a problem with the schedule. now that we’re so progressive, now that women have actually more rights than men do, women can’t find enough love to support their husbands? i just hope people don’t call me a snob. red pill believed the roman’s belief system to be accurate – and use this to justify misogny towards women. hoping im not pregnant cz i dont know what i would do… dont get me wrong, he is a great guy,he cares and he loves me in his own way, but im sure he does, he always listens, and cares about me, no matter how intense or bitch i could be, or how do i look, every single time he has off work he is with me, but i just feel is not going to be enough in a future, and i just feel that now im tied up in some monotony. i can take funds that would otherwise get pissed away on some weekend hotel “getaway” to cover the co-payment on braces for my daughter or new, unscratched glasses for the boys. the man/emo teenager thing does not turn me on. of it is that you’re stretched so thin that you probably haven’t got enough time to increase the number of women you’re meeting. however, the last couple of men i have dated seriously took me for granted. so now he is in therapy and waiting on getting a settlement., there is nothing “wrong” (or, for that matter, “right”) about dating someone disabled; there are many people who happily couple or marry someone who is disabled, whether physically or mentally. the poorest women i interact with seem to be okay with this concept however we as a couple would be such a mismatch that any life with her would raise constant suspicion and questions. if you are a believer in “till death do us part”, and you love him, you owe him time and absolute honesty with how you feel, and need to try to understand and work with him, exactly as he does for you. that is the true nature of unchecked humanity today, not genetics. i just don’t know how long i can wait for him or if i should just let him deal with it? then i was placed on leave for over a year while my shooting was investigated, and when it was deemed justified i was able to return to work, but chose not to. i was an orphan, and i divorced when my children were young. so he is out the door and i am back to being single again. if you make enough to have luxuries like that as a woman but your man can’t, rather than complain about him, be dang glad that you can at all. if a guy doesn’t have the motivation to have his priorities in order and something to show for it, then he is not a candidate. if you don’t, whether or not you’ve been faithful, loving, supportive, a great father, husband, friend is irrelevant. there are far more of them than there are that do, especially as the church and moral absolutes continue to die. i’m in constant danger of loosing the job every time one of them gets sick and i must take off to be with them cause the school or daycare won’t allow them. he has prior old felonies from over 20 years ago and got into a verbal alteration that led to his ex filing a restraining order against him last year. it’s the only thing that i am expecting him to pay for. does not matter to me john…i’m interested in honesty, integrity, and a personality fit. so again, where are men that can stand on their own, or how come i never find them? at these work functions it’s always a game to see who has taken the most lavish trip or visited the more interesting place and i’m wondering if it would just be easier to date someone in that world. is this man giving you happiness or are you too stressed about the situation. things you need to know before dating an outgoing introvert. he needs to know how much all of this is bothering you, and you need to at the very least take his feelings and desires into consideration. he makes me laugh and has been a rock throughout the saddest times of my life, but his finances are like he’s a thief…borrowing with no intent of repaying. you have money and nice things he wants, he’ll kill you, take your stuff and force himself upon your woman. now i am back in the dating world and have dated a few guys that even though they make less then me, they pay for their own things and sometimes can afford to treat me(which is great, not needed but a nice surprise) i love buying gifts for people it makes me happy so i have treated them as well. if you resent him for the sacrifices you make for him then you dont love him. “the men” are also back in another time… because in our hyper digital automated society, they are not needed.! he loved the lifestyle i was able to give him but i realized that after years of enduring his abusive temper, he liked to degrade me with his words, he did not love me, because if he had loved me, he would have taken some of the burden of supporting both of our lives away from me by getting a job and keeping it. you can have everything going for you and still get ground into the mud. perhaps true thousands of years ago, but nature verses nurture my friend has wiped that out of humanity. what fun is eating out alone, or vacationing alone if you can afford to do so? advice is to stop looking for advice somewhere else; instead, look inside yourself, but first ask yourself this and ponder on this: “what is love? the most important thing i believe i could ever pass on to them would be to avoid relationships at all cost, but i don’t have the heart to do it. i knew my ex liked to spend but he started with small credit card bills.. please smile and know god has that special lady out there for u.: for women money and security is the only valuable thing in men. perhaps the criminals that are slaughtering baby girls when born have the right idea, but the wrong gender…this is what a man today gets from a woman. i absolutely would do that now — however — if he was making good decisions and paying it down, it wouldn’t be a deal-breaker. were times where i gave him money during our relationship (some was a a loan, some just little stuff for gas or food because i felt so bad for him). after working there for a long time, you get residuals. my ex, like you was a single dad and barely made enough to survive. never asked any former partner or husband about his debt. as long as you’re financially secure and can get an equal job if you lose your current one, i don’t see the problem finding a partner. i think men today, need to increase their testosterone levels, and i’m not joking. i no longer need to worry about spending 50$ on a dinner that should otherwise go into a college fund or a couple pairs of needed new school shoes. i am like fly to fly paper for men who have no money. but still there is chance for him to better himself and earn money regularly, and then someone else will benefit from that instead of me. would never not have enough money to not be able to pay my bills or pay for petrol or pay for any gifts, or dates or anything like that but i just feel as i’m technically a low income earner i would never really be good enough for someone, even though i am a selfless, giving, caring person. i wouldnt really care if he made less than me. work on your confidence and the income will matter less. haha, i know this sounds bad, but hey, thats how it went down, and yet i stood by her, strong in my faith and my love for her, which grew every month). however, it is natural for a man (most) to have instincts that motivate his sense of purpose – to be the “provider, bread winner, protector” of his family. they will not tell you this of course but many do see it this way. now i’m back in the dating pool i want to stay true to who i am and keep my take as i find attitude but dealing with this has me wondering if there’s some truth in articles like this. a relationship will take away from the ability to serve others for the greater good of your fellow human., at least you can support yourself if you live with someone. are multiple comments on someone coming from “poor backgrounds” etc which go on to refer to those people as not being good dating material, and all from women i might add sadly. i figured i would just focus on my kids and career. painfully obvious signs the man you’re dating is a total douchebag. because i am a woman i still love him but i realize that i have been the only one with love. he “was” he “had” he “can” he “did,” etc but after 7-8 years of zero, no steady income, always morose because he “was” he “had” he “did,” etc and then you finally had the unmitigated gall to complain that i wake him up in the morning (while i’m getting ready for work – i work at 7 so i get up at 5) and why don’t i co-sign for a loan for him, etc and yet i’ve had to chase him down for his portion of the utilities too many times and have had many arguments with him, but don’t i see that if he “did” and if he “was” and if he “could” he would help me, although he has never been in a position to, i finally said, i guess it’s the shelter for you darling because ain’t no man living in my house that doesn’t contribute in many, many ways, including monetarily.’m 41 years old, and last year i got a disillusionment from someone who was extremely abusive and cruel to me that i was in a relationship with for thirteen years, before that i was not very wise in matters of dating, but that was my first relationship since high school. and obviously if one gives 90, or even 450 out of 500 million, sorry but i am laughing scenically. the flip side, i would have no qualms dating a woman who makes less money than me as long as she is able to support herself (and as long as she is ambitious and passionate about her work). a women, i can’t respect any other female who insists on, or expects a man to take care of her, and can’t take care of herself (i. do men really want women to marry them to support them or do they want women who can bring their own money and stuff to the table so they can be equal partners?’m sensing the love man, and i completely agree with what you wrote. of course not because right now, you’re benefiting from the privileges granted to you by feminism and the old, traditional value system. all those things don’t resolve his guilt over not being able to provide for himself/me. there is nothing to keep women’s behavior in check anymore so now you all showed is your true nature and now we aren’t going to marry you leeches anymore. he lost his long time job right as we got together and he didnt seem too interested in getting another job. i stayed home and went to school while taking care of our kids. since no longer having to worry about a relationship, especially since i had no say in the matter either, has been exceptionally difficuly, but also liberating. the true “beta male” would be the one who fear the alpha, knows he can’t win, and chooses to serve and work for him in order to survive. to be honest, i’ve traveled the world, been in orgies, tried all kinds of activities, done all kinds of careers and schooling. so we agree to meet for coffee, and he then tells me that he can’t buy my coffee as well as his own as he is broke. one is exploring the daily decisions, struggles and victories they face. what he doesnt say is that he would do the same for his wife. and men who call women insensitive and “gold diggers” are just justifying their lack of determination in working hard, and educating themselves in earning a better job/income. i think you know the answer, just want confirmation that you are doing the right thing and not to feel alone again. but this was not entirely different to how the rest of the animal kingdom goes about this male female thingy. you value your spirituality, so you should know that you put yourself last and others first, especially your children. my mother didn’t work, but she raised 2 kids while my dad worked full time. what kind of trust do you have in a man that you dont know how he made his money? there would be non-stop suspicion and weirdness in all social situations. that number is projected to keep climbing, with more women earning college degrees than men now, and young women’s ambitions for high-paying jobs outstripping young men’s. think women who don’t date for money or, who see this trend and look away exist. — or close to free, like making you dinner (nothing fancy, but it’s the thought), renting a movie and massaging your feet, playing guitar and singing for you (if he can), etc. he moved in with me supposedly not to move my kids out of their school and for me to stay local to my job. practice being friendly with everybody – men, kids, dogs, as well as women until it feels normal again. so leaving the army, his grannys house, and his hometown meant marriage was the first time he’d ever had to make financial decisions for himself, and boy does he suck at it.? it’s one thing to support someone, it’s another to be taken advantage of (like “running off and spend it to take other girls out. the woman, as our equal, dominates us emotionally & we submit to her. he said he would still pay me and that he will not forget what i did for him. i have always been the same way — don’t care about money. i think choosing women who earn six figures as an essential criteria may be the way forward for men in general – and anyone earning less can be called ‘immature’ (equality rocks). he knows the problem and looking for a job but this is tiering. honey that just means you’ll be in debt a long time because you’re more concerned with the monthly payment than paying it off, you’re nowhere near marriage material in my opinion. i raised, supported and sent my kids to college on my own, but due to a life threatening event, i have decided to love everyday, because we are not promised tomorrow. do not get me wrong, just because i have not found anyone i am not calling foul and unfair to single myself out, but when it is more than just myself, then it is worth calling foul. thinks we have what it takes to get along romantically, says he still wants to meet and that i will change my mind. in the cases of most of the ladies here, it is not so much by choice but by deception. but please don’t blame feminism — please remember that for way too long, women were barred from colleges and from any kind of career that they could support themselves. the posts are correct, you like drama and you’re being played. building a home and future for him now is what you two work towards. in fact, as a career-minded woman, i feel quite liberated that i might be able to pursue my dream career while he takes care of everything else (home, family, etc).. i worked very hard to get a good paying job so i could live the lifestyle that i’ve always wanted to have and it is not at all selfish to expect my partner to do the same. you love him then you should be eager to contribute more then 50%. (i am also not looking for a quick fuck in which case it doesn’t matter, which is why many broke guys are players and sleep around. he has maxed out his cards so he literally has no money. to make a relationship work, the couple needs to have the some financial values. hence why it takes 2 humans (or creatures) to make a baby. i will pray for you and hope that you find the courage to decide that you deserve nothing but the best because god loves you. you cannot sacrifice your faith though, that’s more important than either of you. a guy, i have no problem whatsoever dating a woman making more money than me, even significantly more. we are more complex than we have been simplified into being by mass propaganda. all you are is his, and all he is is yours, and all you are together is for your faith and your children. i started seeing him, i knew he didnt have a job, sometimes he used to dive in to the sea, to catch some fishes to sell them and make some or gold for that matter, anyways, the point is that i made him very clear at the beginning of the relationship that i didnt want to be in one, because i was looking for something long term, which he was pretty insistent with me to make me say yes to the relationship,. i wonder why… i even thought (foolishly) that i needed to prove i loved her & stopped short of standing outside her window with a boombox playing “our song”. i stay with a woman who work and spend her money on what she want going continuely in debt and expect for me to pay het bills, while i pay all bills in, the house. but then i think what if they get arrested and get bad record which would make it even harder to find a job. all four i met through work at a fortune 500 business, so it isn’t like i was trolling the bars and internet. i don’t care what anyone tells you, if he/she cannot take care of the basic necessities of life, they will always be looking for someone to “help them out”..and i have always been a firm believer that a female should not be the one constantly giving and giving in a relationship esp to a man she just met. he could get something better, ie a room in a really nice share house for the same money. little did i know he was in the business of being broke all the time. just hold your horses because the robots are coming to hammer all your picture nails and screw you at night… for a affordable monthly subscription fee. gosh…”he’s a great guy”, “you have lots in common”, “he works his butt off”, “your friends all think he’s great”, ect…so the only thing causing you to contemplate bailing out is money, retirement money, and your friends all understand? tip is if you feel you are being used for money by some loser guy, you are being used, and run run run immediately. you can change the odds a bit with education and hard work, but in reality, it’s nothing more than a roll of the dice, and the “house” always wins. if i am dating someone i have no problem for paying for dates, but only if they pay for the next one, i want equality not to pay for everything. a few years ago, the book smart girls marry money: how women have been duped into the romantic dream — and how they’re paying for it advised women to do just that. you can help him find solutions — job referrals, grants, social services, etc. i recently started dating a great guy that is 59 has a 1st and 2nd mortgage on a 150k home plus is making payments on his 9 yr old car. it’s not: estes says there are certain “red flags” that should not be overlooked. but instead he lives in this horrible flat, that i only just saw recently. guys, this is it right here, have money or you are worthless, and you especially better have it as you near the end of the game.’t get a job until i was 21, didn’t get, my license, move out of home and it really did a number on me, i was also picked on quite a lot in high school as i was over weight which i think affected me socially in terms of i have a minor case of social anxiety, it’s not debilitating but i do notice it and it affects certain things. mine as well do it well or find someone at that level.
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Dating Men with no job my entire career and path as a human being was pretty much crippled because apparently everyone born generation x and after got this except the parents. it was as if he enjoyed not having to work, but still being able to live comfortably. one man, was full of passion, fire, dreams, impulsive spender, and promises that he swore by to be financially stable… the other man, financially savvy and stable, not as passionate to me, but he does love me, he is more practical and projects to save in order to be comfortable and travel in older years. dating and relationships relationship advice love & sex men not to date. i read plenty of books of many genres so i see myself as well-versed in a few topics. our twisted system today has nothing to do with anything even remotely close to alpha and beta. is the founder and editor-in-chief of badass + living and bdc digital media, llc. what i’ve heard here, i’m not sure if decent, caring, unjudgemental women even exist, and therefore whether getting married is such a great idea. he has never attended college and seems comfortable working as a cook in a house. asked my husband for a divorce because he did not work for several years despite having two impressive degrees, did not want to do anything and other problems that i will not get into. as this article and the corresponding comment thread clearly reveals women will only engage men that either make as much money as them or more. and yes, it is completely understandable that she didn’t love you anymore, because love is a form of attraction. it’s not: if your man’s mom is having an issue every time you have a date or the majority of his conversations include his family members, it may be time to cut the chord. these changes in effort can be very foretelling of how he will be a year or two down the road. if someone wants to be stable, i applaud them for being honestly stable, but to turn away and scoff at people because others thing they are a burden? this: 30 things smart women know by the time they’re 30. didn’t mean it so much as your article gave off that vibe, i definitely noted you mentioning several times that it isn’t a massive factor for you, it’s more that i was on a bit of a cycle of reading these types of articles combined with the comments to the article the consensus i picked up was the majority was on the side of “if he can’t pull in a big wage his compassion and caring side count for nothing” and that just makes me feel like there’s a slight double standard that exists with certain things. these skills are not only about self-sufficiency (and a dislike of smells and critters), but show that one is interested in enjoying life and not too lazy to go beyond the basics. i don’t understand how every man i get involved with starts out okay, and then falls into a money pit a year or two later, where they suddenly can’t afford anything! never made a lot of money in my career — newspaper journalism — but that didn’t stop men from dating me, or two men from marrying me. also, me stating that no problems with a man being a ‘stay at home dad’ should have alerted you that we were pretty much in agreement. a women values a man by his monetary worth and not by his true worth which is his character then it is women who will lose, not men. we raise children, we educate ourselves, we take care of people in our lives because that’s just our ‘nurturing’ nature. over the past years have i tried to find another, and absolutely not said anything like i mentioned above? you like and value your career and pushing it forward. i’ve also heard way to many men state that “if she’s unhappy, she’ll tell me what’s wrong”. i keep my figure nice and i can afford high end (anything i need). and to his credit before things got heated , he admitted that he served a couple ( yes, a couple) of brief sentences in jail for drug dealing. if so, then why not live for him and forget the money crap. i started working at another job where i was making enough $$ to pay the full rent. so, feels guilty though i try to make him not feel guilty yet he also has means to better his situation and doesn’t take the opportunities. could i get lucky in love twice or am i taking on an anchor if i pursue things with this man? money is just not that important to me, but you can’t survive without it. (this rule doesn’t apply for quick flings, only for relationships. anthough i do not live for money, i understand that it is a necessity to have some money, just to live… or else you are living of charity essentially. i’ve also told him that if can’t come up with a viable plan to fix this and stick to it than i can’t see him anymore. on i hooked up with a girl that had been after me for a while. will i help her out financially if she made a lot less than me or if she were laid off or something? and i am tired of being mom to this man. variation of this article can be written as, “he’s short, you’re not — do you date him? motivation and getting out there and trying to help pay bills or get you a cheap christmas present that he bought with what he had…. do not go into detail about your finances esp if you make a decent salary. months after we were in the relationship he got a job in a supermarket as security guard, but here in my country that doesnt really makes a lot, its like almost 0 dollars per month, i make 600 up to 800 per month, by taking calls in a call center, he never went to college he only graduated highschool, im in law school right now… from the very beginning since i knew he didnt have a job or was making money he could spend, if i had money i would invite him out to dinner, or to the movies or whatever and it was me paying for it which i didnt mind, he is not the kind of men who buys flower, or invite u to the movies, or out, he rather visit me at home and watch a movie in netflix and thats it, we have made plans to go out, but none of them works out, something always happen, and the day it may happen, i say no, just because i think i will have to pay for the date. or click here to learn the best methods for writing the perfect online dating profiles. it’s not something i can get my head around, why women are so determined to stay in relationships with issues. i wouldn’t date a man with restraining orders against him — would you judge me for that? we as men used to hold true to the codes of chivalry & bushido & vied for our position atop the food chain with feats of valour, intellect, strength & courage. i don’t know i sort of see quite often if a man likes a woman based on looks he’s shallow, if he just wants sex he’s a shallow pig etc. i don’t own a single piece of clothing that isn’t left over from highschool 20yrs ago, and even my footwear was bought for me as required work safety equipment. because they know how the axe falls, the pitfalls etc. a guy was driving a company vehical and smashed into the back of his car. have been in a situation before where i lived with someone who was a trainee. i don’t think he can contribute to my living situation and i can’t afford him too but if i break up with him because i’m fed up of his lack of money and his big debts that makes me appear to be an awful human being, not taking him in and breaking up with him at his lowest point financially. that’s not to say women dont but in a male dominated workforce men have the greater experience, at present. that is how you will really change your situation and attract love to your life because the reality is, even if your dream woman walked into your life right now, your own beliefs of being unworthy would get in the way and your dream woman doesn’t deserve that. his income does not support that load and it also shows extreme carelessness. the bottom line is people in general can be selfish, or self-sacrificing. despite my mate’s lower income, i still cook and clean for him – because i love and respect him and that’s how he understands my affection. broke men offer women the space to get an education by making way for them. would you force him to do something he hates just to satisfy your desires? i have no hope that i’ll ever get a real full time job, despite my education and skill set there are no opportunities in my entire province, and even if there was something elsewhere he’s stuck in our city because he won’t leave his job. men and women are wired differently, by nature (or by god if you are religious). i hear you say “he thinks we have what it takes to get along romantically” while also admitting “i can’t imagine getting into a relationship with someone who tells me in advance that he can’t buy a cup of coffee. some men with no ambition whatsoever like to talk up a good game, but at the end of the day, they are just saying what they know women want to hear. wives making big bucks are simply following programs and not inventing anything new. after all, there’s no financial recourse to me but i’m not sure how my feelings for him should outweigh his financial issues. if they are not providing for even them selves, that is a red flag. more free tips from joshua pompey, including how to write successful emails online, click here now. love is all about “give and take”, not “give and give” or “take and take”. its not his daughter, but if he is commited to me, then he needs to really go out there and not keep waiting on settlement money and his part time pizza job is just not cutting it. men have a low probability of marrying a rich woman, but a poor woman’s chances of marrying a rich man is substantially better (as long as she’s young and hot). i’m really sorry that you are struggling after doing what was a wonderful and necessary thing to do, caretake your parents. i had two children from a previous marriage that i had sole co of, i had a good job, remarried to a poor woman raised her child as my own, as well, i got hurt at work had a few surgeries, my injuries became a disability so something’s had to go, house paid for, new cars traded for older ones that were paid for as well, and she’s gone! the first 4 months, i agreed to it because i knew he was just getting back to work. if you can’t be happy on your own, don’t expect anyone else to do it for you. am i right for expecting him to work full time so that he can contribute more financially. we were afforded the same opportunities but i have moved up in pay drastically in a few short years, mostly because i have worked my ass off and demanded more. for the last 2 years, i have been the bread winner. i never really thought about money when i thought about dating, but i have a friend whom i adore and who has said he wants to marry me.” hmm, there are such things as being widowed or divorced …. he has a drug felony from 10 years ago and he said that because he is black in west virginia, he can’t get a job. i purchased a smaller more affordable house, sold the old house and moved without him. he loves you he will get a job of some sort and be a man who will contribute. if you’re married already, embrace him, but pull back the cash for all but what’s necessary for normal life expenses, and discuss with him your concerns. i hope you recognize and celebrate all the great things you bring to the world; if you believe that, someone, and most likely a lot of someones, will see that, too. a male takes care of the house supported financially, it’s seen as babysitting the male. if you can’t abide a man or woman who does not have the same drive for success as you, by all means let them go. women are afraid that dating an unemployed man will come with financial obligations. people wouldn’t even hang out with me on the weekends because i couldn’t go to concerts or to the desert. one is more physical (broke guy), the other is more intellectual (rich guy). what if i start hating my job or if i want to stay home with my kids if i have them? research found that women were more concerned with men being "engaged in an activity" rather than having a huge paycheck. i told him if he asks me for money he is out the door. i love every bit of him except that he is not financially stable. it will not get any better, it will get worse. world is changing, and our aspirations have to change with it. then, again, we have only been dating for a few weeks. he is struggling to find work, and his mum is on his throat all the time with work and money. i own my own home, brand new car, credit card, all the stuff i need and want. me, i’m 35 years old now, male, 5’6, 150 pounds, very attractive white skinned hispanic, well educated, witty, talented, and athletic guy with a big heart, loving, kind, and respectful to all people. among the interesting questions posed:What happens when a man marries a woman who has the education and skills to earn more than him? she said that i was “too lazy and unmotivated for her” and that “she was tired of lying to her friends and co-workers about my profession” and that “she would only marry a man that made more money than her” and that “she was ashamed of me” and so and and so on and more and more shit like that. regretted not dumping him sooner because after he got himself sorted out. lord, forgive me, this is horribly inappropriate, but i just can’t resist. his mum dictates everything now and told him to sort out his life first before letting me to come visit. dating someone who refuses to do anything new makes for a long-term relationship that is both boring and one-sided. he’s a great guy, we have a lot in common, but it has taken a huge toll on our relationship, because i worry about a future, retirement, with this man. anytime i even mention his profession i feel like i have to ad a caveat that he’s looking at this ngo or looking to get his masters and go to this non profit. i will sing the praises to remain single because of all the good things one can do for others by remaining that way., the survey revealed that men were far more open-minded when it comes to dating a woman without a job. men may not like being tied down to a phone, but responding to your text messages or phone calls shouldn't be annoying; it's common courtesy and respect. she started to complain and boast about how i was ‘nothing’ and she was a ‘professional’ (a professional whore…heh, again jk). i can understand that you might be depressed by your romantic prospects; that said, that might be working against you in finding a partner. now i can’t even play videogames because this trend has turned games from just awesome stories to these weird social media experiences. we would argue about that often; i told him it wasn’t right for me to be over there because i was interfering with their bonding time but his excuse was:”they are older children, they’re ok, they do their own thing. he is really good to me, he makes sure that i’m always taken care of, that i’ve eaten or that my laundry is done and super supportive in literally everything i do (for example, if i said i wanted to be an astronaut, he’d buy me a how to book and tell me i can do anything). he’s always trying to reassure me and promises as to what he’ll be able to provide going forward. have never been one to judge a man on his income or living situation because my living situation isn’t great and has been worse in the past and my income is only just getting to where i want it to be. am not dating because i have no job and no stable income, and very high stress from all of this because i am getting older and finally after doing so many family activities wants to settle down.” is a man who provides for his kids and protects them in non-economic ways less of a man? no one is asking the questions—big, small and unexpected—that they encounter as they navigate this new frontier of what it means to be a man, a woman, a couple, and a family..9 mnths after that period he got another job but he was making . it’s workable: if your man is a bit shy or a bit of a loner, it doesn’t mean you need to dump him. people in customer service are a good start, they’re hired for their people skills. puporse is to explain to men that women are incapible of loving them in any meaningful way. with this in mind he has begun job-hunting in earnest, has met with debt specialists to solve his situation, and is trying to turn his life around with our joint future in mind. i got really angry and told him that i was tired of him not having the rent money on time and he started to bring up his children need his money bla bla . and whet often those people do it give some of this money to “clean themselves” but things do not work that way. if you’re both doing what it takes to cover the real essentials of life, like simple food you prepare, not a dang overpriced restaurant, simple clothing from walmart/target/kmart or the salvation army stores, a simple warm safe home, not some 2500+ square foot, half a million+ monster on a lake shore, and a car that gets you to and from work safely and reliably, not some brand new 50k+ gasoline guzzeler, wth are you complaining about? and as long as i see my man doing his best, then i am content. if a man cannot support himself, his children, woman, he needs to get grinding and bust his ass., if you experience a bad bout of health at the menopause, well, do not be surprised your man leaves you (thanks to my profession, i can tell you that many men leave for that reason), because actually he also has other things to do than mothering you with this problem, same if you get seriously sick. i am getting so frustrated and i find it so difficult to talk to him in a way that isn’t just attacking him but money is security for me and it is an important thing. it’s not a deal breaker for me because he is truly an amazing man. everything i have or ever will have is for them. if my entrepreneurial masterpiece, my baby, doesn’t make me money-rich, at least i know it’s improving the lives of scores of people, and perhaps i’ll just release it or operate it for free and be a benevolent steward, still going from paycheque to paycheque working a precarious day job. wary of men who constantly look for deals and comment on prices early on in the dating process. love is wonderful, laziness and having to step up and be the ‘man’ financially, isn’t.! i’m sorry, but you are why this article is written, and why so many men are either angry, sad, or completely defeated by this and so many other articles just like this. she cried, said yes… and wrote me the worst vituperative e-mail ever; and dumped me. the last boyfriend lived with me rent free for the last year. i wouldn’t date a meth head — would you judge me for that? huge debt is a red flag, and marriage melds your finances; unless you are ready to pay for his debt, i would think long and hard about tying the knot. some old lonely hen gathering at a table in a local bar or restaurant with other lonely hens to play cards and complain about your neighbors once a week? however, as time goes on, a man will feel less attracted to his wife as she gets older, fatter, older, and wrinklier. good broke men offer good protection, sounding boards and generally good life advice for children of all ages…good broke men i said. one that accepts you too quickly is also a big no-no. i reach an age where i can say with almost certainty that people with large income have at some point been lying, cheating or else. that the way it suppose to be that female reley on a man pocket. apparently some women think just having a vagina is enough. i still don’t equate it to whether i am happy or not (and never will), although i acknowledge money certainly makes things easier. – if you can’t find a girl that’s not like this, then seriously – find a boyfriend. feminism has opened up pandoras box, and now lots of adversity with it – for our children, and their children’s generations. i do nothing for myself, and i’m fine with that. i never had a lot of money, i depended on my college loans and part time work, and everything was fine – she seemed to be madly in love with me, as i definitely was was her – one could say that i was the happiest man alive. and release; best dating advise for any man; broke or rich. i have not worked for the last 12 years mainly just clean the house make lunch to take to her and cook dinner for when she gets home. why not focus on making money so we can live comfortably instead of philosophy which doesn’t pay the bills? should i ask him to consider maybe a higher paying job that we won’t fall flat if i want to step back from my income? (and read my 21 pieces of unsolicited advice for you, the brokenhearted. and soon the world became imbalanced as the value of life became attached to how much currency you had access to. articles that seem to confirm that sort of “he doesn’t earn much so he ain’t worth your time, dump him! their loyalty and companionship is conditional on whether or not the man is bringing in more money than they are. “people can bond over their career passion or it can highlight opposing values,” says estes who adds that the way a person approaches their career can also show how they can be in a relationship. red pill says that women are only capible of viewing men as whatever they can contribute financially, and their place in the social order.” or a potential business relationship goes sour: “what’s wrong with him? they are being bred at a rate second to none. i am a legal professional, and my dear one is a carpenter . or maybe she just happens to be in a profession that pays more. but i cannot shake this suspicion that he is comfortable with the idea of being “a kept man”. a male takes care of the house supported financially, it’s seen as babysitting the male. you discuss gender roles and money as if there was a clear formula. while no man should always be expected to plan five-star dates, at the same time, the romance shouldn't just completely fall off a cliff at once. “he needs to be able to stand on his own two feet as a self-reliant man who makes his own decisions, can face the world on his own and pay his own bills without help. think the lack of confidence, whinginess by saying you care for elderly and wish you were dead is a big enough problem in itself. if you let him know that and cut off the money supply, his true personality will be apparent. he is always jumping from job to job and they never pay much but he works hard and is always employed. and he feels like shit thinking that maybe it would be better for me if i let him go, and soon find someone who can take better care for me. my friend eventually told me she had left me for another guy & explained how he knew him & he was well off blah blah blah. am about 40 years old and had no/unstable jobs the last 5 years. don’t blame the world because you’re a loser. before i delve into what will be both my analysis & indictment of the reality of the male female thing circa 2016… i want to put my response to this article into context. one would be hard pressed to find instances where a woman makes even slightly more than her husband without the subject quickly becoming a point of contention. when he told me wanted a divorce to pursue other women …. because she is greedy selfish and she wont settle for anything less.’m 28 haven’t had a gi since i was 21, single parent 24/7 all year no mommy. now that she was making ‘big money’ (which really wasnt even that much), it was very apparent that she thought herself all of a sudden to be ‘the hottest shit on the market. he didn’t think he’d have to pay support. lastly, one does not become good but giving 90 million when one has made 500 million. reuters/brendan mcdermid "not having a job will definitely make it harder for men to date someone they don't already know," irene lacota, spokesperson for "it's just lunch" said in a statement. i’m merely stating a simple fact that men are cool with dating women shorter than them, but most women (98. no, instead, you whine about how hot young women don’t want to give a chance to someone who is broke, out of shape, and ugly. good on your for working on yourself, so you can be proud of yourself, and attract the mate you want/deserve. guys pls help i’m dating a guy he is unemployed apparently left the job bcs they pay him small money but now he is too lazy to go and look for another job i love him but i dought he will leave me when he gets a job cs he is childish i always tell him about it and he is not happy he gets angry and he is soo negative to everything he just eat and sleep everyday whole i go to wrk. marriage and children were all up for discussion, until the point i chose to follow a different carrier path, and that would mean i would do without for a few years while i pursed my graduate degree. i agree; it’s not easy and it adds an extra layer on top of dating nowadays, which is challenging in and of itself!(paying for dates and all that crap is not old school patriarchical sexism, it is man expressing his ability to take care of you, in other words, that he is alpha. of savings i have enough cash, plus a small amount in retirement.
Is it Foolish to Date a Guy Based on His Potential? but what if the woman stays in the labor force and does earn more than her spouse? are 5 times more likely to cheat when they’re financially dependent on their wives. i even give him my bank card and my pin so he can pay if we are together just to try save him some respect as a man. the guy i’ve been seeing for just over a month is younger, 26, has a car, has an apt. i am at the stage where i really want someone to be there for me, be able to rely on them , and i dont know if i can with this guy. will he really do absolutely nothing to make even the slightest improvements or changes to himself to help ease your concerns even with full and understanding knowledge of what you are feeling? maybe give him a time by which he needs to either have a better-paying job or a second job so he can pay more of his share. and, for the record, feminism did not strip those traditional-minded men from their jobs or fates — technology, job outsourcing, the decimation of unions, the great recession, etc. you need to play it like you are doing okay and managing thats about it. am a low paid male and looking at all these websites has confirmed my worst fears! one becomes more dependent and lazier than the next, until i have had enough and end the relationship, after several years and move on. only thing that is selfish is sitting around watching someone else struggle to support you and then complaining they don’t love you because they aren’t eager to support you. i work with many college educated women and you know what the prize is that they all dream about…… that their husband rise through the ranks in their jobs and increase their salaries so they can quit their jobs and raise their children, surprise, surprise. it is not about them being able to pay for more its about them paying their share! my own belief is that i would gladly die, or live with eternal pain and suffering to make dang sure that the children have what they need first. guy for 3years he has not being working since , he drive my car i pay for his medical insurance food and cell phone allowance and i help him with pocket money he says if i love him i can give him loan or open a business for him, he says he is tired of watching me me being rich and eating my money, is it my resposibility to help him with opening. it would just be nice to be able to rely on my boyfriend financially, not because i need it, but because it is what is right. there is so much to this story, but i don’t want to bore anyone to tears. we have had no fights or any issues in our relationship. if he’s not willing to work hard for you, leave him, but that has nothing to do with money. but, i refuse to have a man who will take advantage of me financially, period. then if you really get desperate for pussy, you can rent them by the hour. think men have it harder as far as obtaining a stable job, and keeping it.. i have found myself dating guys who are only out for money and when it’s gone so are they. when we met he told me he is a business man. — and emotionally support him in that journey, but you are free to draw the boundaries — especially when it comes to money.” mindset really get to me and sometimes make me think i don’t stand a chance, sort of makes me feel like a mans purpose in life now is money dispenser, his other qualities don’t matter if he doesn’t bring back a tonne of money. i’ve paid for everything including his child support twice. guy i am friends with now- well he is in unstable employment, casual work that changes each week. i think the old way of the male being the bread winner is out, our economy is too crappy for that kind of relationship to be the standard.’m 32, single, no kids and never been married (yet 😉 ) and i just purchased my first home in february. he do all the handyman work around the house, takes the pressure off me when i’m tired. for example, a few years ago i was extremely stressed out and hated my job to the point that it seriously affected my health (including complicating a heart condition). could not agree with this post or the above mentioned red pill philosophy more. from a womans perspective a man must be investing more into the relationship than she is otherwise it isnt worth it. never even occurred to me to worry about such things (i’ve never discussed credit ratings with a partner), but that doesn’t mean i shouldn’t have paid it some attention when it seemed like things were getting serious. i have had to work very hard to get myself into the financial position i am. i don’t believe it’s always the man with the money but you know in your heart, he’s good to you treats you like a lady, but not a player. you should love them for them, not what they have or what you can benefit from them. i got told i should be aiming for a man that will pay my bills whether he lived with me or not, had a car and a place and paid for all dates. — but i’m not interested, and that has nothing to do with lizards or brains.! good stuff brother…don’t give up your hopes though…i’m sure there are soem good women out there, although, i’m also sure there are many wicked one’s…it’s a matter of luck i guess? still, i’m a firm believer that all adults should know to make a decent omelette and steak, and they should want to wash the dishes within a few hours of the meal. “if his entire family is adding you on facebook the first month or your meeting the family on the first few dates, you’re seeing big, red flags,” she says.. men don’t give a damn if he has to provide for a woman. you must have a steady job with a good attendance record. or if you go to the movies you can buy the tickets and they can buy the snacks, see? if you truly love her, take out as much life insurance as you can afford while you’re still young enough to get it, wait at least a year so it doesn’t look suspicious, then find a nice oncoming semi some random evening on the way home from your “bust ass for nothing” job that you’ve worked at so long and hard to pay the bills and support her as best you can, and “accidently” cross over into it. but anyone who has been working for a couple of years and still lives with his mother past this age is never going to grow up. accept, since we lived together, i no longer had to go home to play ps or watch sport, i just sat on the couch in the lounge. i sometimes resent him because i feel i do more than 50%. let you know two things, first money can disappear overnight, a boss can go under if market conditions change for example (ah yes, not a problem, you can then dump the guy you said i love you whatever…), meaning you not only love for the wrong reasons, it is actually not love, but those reasons can be very fleeting. but i was not exactly on a specific direction & so when her friend introduced her to her brother (who was my age, the cfo of a pretty serious company & driving the aston martin i had told her i would one day have…) it was a bit of a problem, considering expectations & i guess her ambitions. would really appreciate if there could be any advices in here for my situation…. always states his age, and health as reasons for his problem holding jobs but he was only 49 when i met him and i helped him get healthier. he will work several low paying jobs, he will learn a trade, he will continue to do what he has to do to not be a burden to you even if he can not fully support you! can forgive someone, but that doesn’t mean they need to stay in your life. he had loans he was paying and dos tell me about it so he was has been paying me 2 payments for the rent .. gold digger types), and as a man that wouldn’t’ be attractive to me (but to some, or a lot of men it is). why the hell worry more about the money when you should be worrying about being with someone who you genuinely like. you are just bitter you got a bad one, so please consider that there are also poor but awesome guys around (not the majority, though, that is true). it’s a multi-year effort, with 100’s of hours invested. it was the biggest mistake i ever made and 15yrs later i’m still waiting for this 40yr old to get it together. like you, i love this man so much, he has a great heart and loves me dearly but the stress of all of this is making us argue a lot over money.’ now would be a good time to interject that she was actually not very attractive.'s nothing wrong with sitting on the couch and watching sports. find the right one and she won’t care about your money, especially in these circumstances, because she won’t be looking solely for someone to bankroll her. you have someone who actually loves you no matter how much you make. as a grown woman, it’s only hot if that band is u2. he is hardworking taking any job he can get but he has no financial values. then he drops the ball that he is broke and has no money. just can’t help but feel unless i get some sort of flash career i don’t stand a chance :/. i work full time and go to school to finish my degree in social work. in a society where men and women fight to be equals in the workplace, it’s amazing to see how a man could be following a low paid vocation that benefits society as a whole and yet be ostracised for earning below the average. building a life is much easier without carrying dead weight..9 mnths after that period he got another job but he was making . we have recently started talking marriage and are nowhere on the same page for the price of the ring. criminals are the closest thing there really is to an alpha anymore. the more you grow, the more the relationship can grow,” says estes. i have just started dating again after almost 3 years and can take care of my needs, but in no way can i afford to keep up with jones, as i have in the past. guy with hustle (legal) will always figure out a way to support himself, his woman, his children ect. only those who think of others, and put them ahead of themselves truly escape that truism only to be trampled into the mud of poverty and loneliness by others who don’t care. if i direct him to go alone he just say i dont knw the place and expect me to understand and othrr thing he is younger than me with 5 yrs a want to ask for advise how to see if a person really loves u even if he doesnt support u financially or just to get up and look for something better to make future better . if not, this will turn into a unhappy marriage and i feel that you need to take care of yourself and your children and be with a man that makes you both happy. lots of people have that or some version; in fact, 1 in 4 have a mental illness, from mild anxiety to ocd (my own son has that) to bipolar to schizophrenia and beyond. men rarely expect a woman to pull her weight, so why do women think this way? the end, i take some gleeful comfort in knowing one retirement option is a 9mm to the head, when i’m done and ready to transfer my energy and give back to the soil. for the real women and men living these changes, no one has really dove in, to look at things from their perspective. after 10 years of him basically doing the same thing, getting jobs, working for while and then quiting. (mind you, she never supported me financially; despite my impoverished condition, i was always the one that paid for our dates when we were in college, and i supported myself financially without her help). now that we are engaged, he has no dollar in his account for our wedding. ), then came into a sizeable inheritance which he began squandering so fast i called off the engagement for fear that his spending habits would carry over into our marriage.’m a 54 yr old financially secure woman and i’m ready to retire or kick down to part time work next year. he has a part time job at a pizza place, but i keep teling him that i need him to work full time until he gets his settlement check. any man who relies on a woman to provide financially, is no man in my eyes. whenever we went out for dinner, i had to pay, groceries, i had to pay, weekends away, the inference that i had to pay unless i helped him out at his work for a few hours. survey, sponsored by dating site "it's just lunch" surveyed 925 single women and found that only 4 percent of respondents answered "of course" when asked whether they would go out with an unemployed man, while the other 21 percent said "yes" but were curious to see how the men were doing in the meantime. he said that i hurt his feelings when i asked him to get a full time job. men are clearly capable of loving women as they prove everytime they couple themselves with a woman that makes less money then they do. what does this have to do with the man you marry then? problem, female home makers decide how to organize and decorate everything, male home makers don’t decide any of it and arguments happen. if it’s a deeply satisfying partnership based on more than just that, great. i think you are a decent woman so don’t allow him to bring you down because in the end you might not notice but little by little you will loose all your self respect because you have already given everything about you that you did not save something for yourself. morning i had an epiphany on why i am no longer sexually attracted to him. he means well and we have talks about how he can plan better but he is more of a talker than do-er.. call me a shallow bitch but at least i am not making a poor depressed man feel worse about his situation by basking in my own stringent but easy one, right under his nose. now that i was no longer “useful” to her social, and economic prosperity, i was old news.) my disability is invisible and i manage it very well. and i do not mind paying for things from time to time as long as there is respect, graditude, and a thank you from time to time. the people before them would think rationally and go independent but these new people are straight crazy and will never let the people they targeted alone. red pill says men love unconditionally – regardless of a woman’s buying power. now you are right, not all men may feel this way, a good percentage of the american population may even agree with you, however you cannot deny that their are happy families with the man at the helm..he finally has decent job but will be forever before can pay me…or rent. to do that, you might need to reframe your story and attitude, and embrace the great skills and nurturing personality you have. sorry at this stage in the game i’m not playing man whisperer. so i end up in alot of situations where women make their availabilty known in an effort to induce me into ask them out. men as a collective have seen your ways just like reading here that men are only an arm for you. i promised myself that as long as i was in the picture, his kids would not see an empty fridge. although she would never admit she left me because of money i know it was a huge factor, which is sad because she had her own house etc and i could of supported us on this low income as she earnt a very good amount of money. it’s laziness, disrespect and no self respecting woman should disrespect herself by having to keep paying and taking care of a man 50% or more. he does pay his rent but when we go out or go on trips i do pay for most of that but i bargain shop the hell out of it so it’s not so bad., etc, did a lot more damage then the fact that women want to work (unless you want us to be “gold-diggers”), make as much as men do (which we still don’t), be educated (you want a smart woman, right? it’s not: if your dude confuses co-dependency with love, doesn’t really have any interests or passions (read: boring) or sacrifices his “alone time” in order to keep you from going out and enjoying yours, it might be time to move forward … on your own. see anna, you are the very reason why the world is crap. however if a female wants to sit on the couch and allow a man to support her she is a fat selfish whore? it is possible to discuss his debt and see if he is willing to eliminate it prior to a serious commitment. as of now, sadly i am unable to work as an old injury i sustained when i was in school got worse, and now i am on disability, pay my bills, have my own place, but as it said in the article, i get zero replies as i am looking for a long term relationship since i would rather not spend the rest of my life on my own. laundry/love equation: ok, so let’s be real: anyone with long workdays and a busy social life knows that take-out numbers are called and tube socks occasionally find a home on the floor. i don’t spend money on anything really as all i do is stay home and workout in my garage. my both sons have jobs, one has a full-time job working 15 hr. now that he is back home, soon he will find a job, maybe a not good of a job cos he is a construction worker and did not go to college. one advise i will give, don’t marry someone unless you accept them for how they are now.’m a man, 36, living alone, physically attractive, relatively low-income, never married, trapped in precarious work (like huge swaths of the population) with minor debt, and no tangible assets. as stated before, all my efforts can go towards making a better life for the children, and nothing needs be held back any longer to keep “her” happy. he looks after me in a very caring way, comforts me when i’m down and always making sure that i’m ok. so please be careful trying to read people, it’s not always what it looks like… and by no means make an assumption…you know what they say about assuming. same as if the company is in trouble, the chairman takes the heat..but one thing that i know —it is not encouraging . i’m very independent and do for myself not expecting a man to fund me or my life so it wasn’t an issue., and i am glad i always kept secret my reasonable (not rich) finances, i could have ended with someone like you. so i really could not have a job as i would be missing to many days traveling with my wife. i’m now dating someone who doesn’t have much, but he has my trust. i have a higher debt load but the monthly payment is way lower and it doesn’t involve the irs and careless car purchases. men go on “cruise control” way too easy, and fall into a “no news is good news” mentality. he could repeat the process over and over with different women because who gives a shit about these whores. but then one day, he decided that he wasn’t worthy of my love. here i am giving a grown ass man pocket change, rubbin’ his back like a baby, having sex with him…. boyfriend is a cpa but he can’t retain a job… during the last year he has changes jobs frequently… i don’t know if is bad luck or if he is lazy… i graduated after him luckily i have a good job and making more money than him… usually i paid most of our dates… i leave alone and support myself… he still leaving at his parent’s house… i love him but i don’t like that he is not financially stable… i just wonder when he is going to growth up… he is already 30.’t matter what has happened in society or the economy over the past 50 years. he said, ‘what, do you think that i don’t want to work full time? to quote the infamous words of the mighty quagmire from family guy….” at 28, i had a usable degree, stable state government job, one paid off vehicle out of two, zero credit card debt, no student loans, no mortgage, and no children. i have supported myself and my children for the last 10 years. but even though that is not an entirely impossible task (survival), money has also been used to class us. can’t get better paying job bc everyone wants a degree these days – he doesnt have one. job/relationship equation: there’s more to him having a job than you not wanting to constantly split (or get) the check; it’s a view into his personal code. if there’s nothing left for you or the man, that’s the price you must pay to be a good parent, and you must learn to pay it with joy in your heart, always. i have never been a woman who expects someone to take care of me, but i want someone that can pull their own weight next to me. my boyfriend is 33, with no higher education, no job and significant debts. have never been one to judge a man on his income or living situation because my living situation isn’t great and has been worse in the past and my income is only just getting to where i want it to be. am 31 year old woman who had worked very hard to be successful. this type of man is basically stuck wanting mom to take care of him and really this type of relationship never will give a grown woman what she wants. meanwhile, highly paid women are dateable and marriage material, as long as they don’t make more than their husbands. all i’ve ever met in the poor culture are opportunistic men looking to marry/relate up. we have lost a war we didnt know was being waged. my boyfriend who i’ve been with for almost two years makes about 60k doing something he loves and i make about three times that amount. people should really start ditching the bible and most religion for common sense… it would be an incredible world. the guy i am dating really does not know that i only work when i elect to work. opinions, however, are often biased and do more harm than good in relationships. what’s important to me is that if the man can’t contribute money, he should be accepting of that and find other ways to support the relationship. probably not (although i imagine a certain amount of women would eagerly entangle themselves if he was hot; yes, we gals can be incredibly shallow, too). i am not money hungry, but i strongly believe that the man should be financially stable to take care of himself, and help me out at sometimes. she will work you as much as she can to get the most out of you but the second you show any weakness she will put you down and make sausage out of you. in any case, women, you are next to be eliminated from the market so enjoy your rewards now. can’t help but notice that the majority of the women supporting the decision to leave a poor partner happen to have been in *bad* relationships to begin with. “i can afford more therefore i am better than you” vibes. if it really did, a true, natural “alpha male” would take what he wanted no matter what the method, and is willing to die trying. look around you at the rest of the dang world you selfish, arrogant moron, male or female. but some men won’t put forth the hustle/effort. i’ve heard way too many “if he really loves me, he’ll see i’m unhappy” stories from women. cut off the money and see if he still wants to be with you……or if he looks fora vetted “mommy”. also, dear, in the same way as you discard a penniless man, do not be surprised that a man will dump you when you start to be old and not so desirable. he speaks of big vacations and for me to do what i plan, bug vacations are not part of my current plan. a world where women make more than you, you live in a world where you are obsolete and meaningless – for this is the depth of emotion they have for you. i have run into problems my entire life because i came from a poor, mentally ill family. your man should feel the same, whether he’s spiritual or not. moreover, i have in mind the concept of “poor + poor = a little better off”; where two low income people join resources and be happier overall. people can have much money and no heart…but there are some with no money but an awesome heart. i will be the first to admit i can’t spell or write, many fields of formal education have little to do with either. now i am grown up and not only is this a reality but bullying turns into gang members, gang stalking and people joining wannabe adult “old boys networks”. i will grab every opportunity i can to make things better if at all possible, but they are what’s important, not me, and i’m fine with that. i let him go home to sort out his life and make something for himself. there is nothing wrong with a guy who wants to grow into a better person, just make sure that he's genuine. my credit card will be paid off in a year and my student loan paid off in 10 years because i’m on the loan forgiveness program (they removed 18 years). i chose the man with money because i gave broke guy a chance to show me that he was capable of responsibility and stability. did anyone have to ie for him to get this money?? i have to be honest and can not start a relationship with a lie. money is not an issue unless it’s an issue.
Dating When You Don't Have a Job - ABC News you can not work in a specific state because networks go so deep. money was tight with her spending & the loans & she point blank told me that she couldnt be with me anymore if i wasnt working. i want a guy with a bit more stability in his life., as much as people like anna are blind and narrow minded, you are in your own right by thinking men love is more genuine. but he always has a reason so when i simply look at his actions as opposed to his words, the truth blares out very loudly…he just want mom to take care of him. unfortunately, i just ended a relationship where i was the spender giving him a chance too. i never asked him for money when he had it but sometimes i kinda expected for him buy a single flower for me or something. second, part of my worry about our relationship is this pressure from the professional world to marry rich and have husbands who are literally running the world and my guy just isn’t that. it is very true what i have said with my last comment which most of the women today unfortunately are very spoiled, selfish, greedy, and very money hungry as well do to their careers that made them that way which is very sad how the women of today are nothing at all like most of the real good old fashioned women were years ago that really made a much better wife anyway which today most of the women that make a very high salary do cause most of the divorces now and it is a known fact. you can thump your chest and roar your bs “alpha male wanna be” roar all you like, but in reality land of usa and earth 2016, pulling yourself up by your own boot straps is something rich people tell poor people to keep them hoping that maybe, just maybe, someday if i try hard enough… it’s little more than a ploy to keep the masses from rebelling. have always (sometimes reluctantly) worked, and bring in average wages. it’s workable: if he just doesn’t know how to clean the toilet or chop an onion, but is open to learning, feel free to move past go. i care for thr elderly by the way and i wish i was dead, thanks for showing all men in my position we are better off dead no matter how loving we are. yes we care that they make enough to support themselves, just like we support ourselves.. i would much rather live in a cars board box and he happy than try to keep up with the high class and only live for money. lesson learned = stay away from venomous snakes…get a whore or jerk off. when we are together out in public he treats me like a queen but the lack of his ability to pay for stuff still bugs the hell out of me. a woman, if you want to succeed and dominate the workforce, make the important decsicions then you need a broken man behind you. i want a leader, a provider and support if i need it. if it feels there is a competing element involved, you may feel that regardless of what you do or say, the family will win,” she says. shit, i wouldn’t work either if someone “gave” me everything i need. says that while a man will often be willing to put himself in harms way for his wife – for a woman, she is incapable of feeling the depth of emotion towards a man, to justify this response. even look at the spiderman movie with toby mcguire or that xmen movie. broke man, will still stand his ground as he has more to lose than his high paid counterpart…. i am fortunate to have a wonderful longtime partner (who, as an educator, knows all about small salaries), but i sometimes wonder what would happen if i lost my job and was looking for love — would i be marriage material (assuming i even wanted to marry again, that is, which i don’t), or even dateable? hung out alot & eventually fell in love with each other after falling into bed together a few times (or before). really want to know this guys name, because you must have kicked him out and now he is living with me urgh…. is long ago, so i do not know if this will be read but anyway. no one can take advantage of us unless we let him/her; you need to take care of yourself, too. i have worked very hard to put myself in a position to spend money as i please and he makes comments about my spending habits that bother me. as long as he supports me emotionally, intellectually, and puts in an extra ‘work shift’ around the house, i am happy to make the financial contribution. i believe women are our equals & that the patriarchal society engendered by capitalism & bigotry was wrong… but i believe that the man is meant to be… the man. obviously we need to eat but i dont know how much longer i can do this without feeling resentful. and the allure of choosing a wealthier man over a better man was born. so no matter what i read on here or anywhere about all this “pride” and “integrity” blah blah that people claim to have…i have yet to meet any poor person, and i’ve known thousands, who puts pride before opportunity. those who back down and start getting lazier after having sex for the first time were probably only after one thing to begin with. i just don’t see how i will ever be able to respect him as a man if he cannot take care of his own basic needs..which i’m not doing cuz i ain’t nobody’s mamma. it hurts to think that i loved him at his worst. he said i mean the world to him and that he wants to able to take me out or travel but he is always broke. keeps saying “when i have money, when i have money, when i have money,” but his job is dead end and doesn’t want more than 1 job because acting – auditions and such. i never was attracted to short men but my boyfriend is my height — doesn’t matter because the rest of him is awesome. meanwhile i still had a year to go before i graduated and was earning a solid 12. but once they have drained a man of everything he was worth they walk away and never look back. we conveniently forget that good women should be treated well. i married another man , who seemed very responsible with money during our courtship (homeowner, steady job, attended university, in the army). comment share tweet share e-maileven in the face of today's tough economy and high unemployment rate, a new study revealed that it is still no excuse: in dating, unemployment is a deal breaker, particularly for straight women. not a good thing, i mean i was always described as a goody two shoes. no one can take advantage of you unless you allow it.:when you say “women are whores” i hope you remember that you didn’t fall from the sky and that a woman gave birth to you. every time i see him he is with a friend i call him “the transporter”. wife is a doctor and i never graduated high school. somehow, i told myself it was okay, when i knew it was not. i don’t need a man to hang a picture of me, or fix my plumbing. if he’s not fighting for something as important as his career, how can you expect him to fight beside you when the going gets tough? i was raised that women do not give their money to men. give him a chance to know how you truly feel, and as a guy here, i mean it, make darn sure he knows how important and critical this is. i was happy when i could just type stuff on a ms dos screen in zork and now i have to spend money monthly to prove my worth to even get permission to play. and author vicki larson's musings on marriage, divorce and parenting. he would get up around noon and start the pattern all over again. thinking you can have both will more than likely find you sitting alone in a wheelchair in some retirement home screaming nonsense at the moon. my question is, why can’t he just get a full time job so that he can help more around the house and not wait on this settlement. sure, you can make some minor improvements to your born class, but you’re an utter moron if you think that hard work alone is going to get you anywhere. i have felt pity for his situation for too long and my friends are now telling me i have to take more care of myself as i will be broke too if i continue to bail him out. really awful things shady guys do that tell you it’s time to break up for good. we have only been seeing each other for around 2 months. when you get in a better place it’ll be easier to find a good woman. of course if you date a dead beat self absorbed leech things are going to go wrong. i tried to help him job hunt, i let him know i was in his corner and wasn’t going anywhere as long as he was faithful, honest, loyal and loving towards me but to no avail; he took out all his woes on me and enough was enough therefore it had to end. and when the body stats to lose its value, they discard, in the same way as nay woman discard for money.! women don’t need to worry about those things with broke men do they beccause they have no money for alcohol, no money to watch sports and probably no friends, none with money to pay for those things anyway. does he not realize that i have been sticking around waiting for 2 years now? “a man working towards a larger goal or fighting for a higher paying position is a lot different from someone who unreliable, lacks ambition or is lazy,” she says. before that i had different jobs but only a few weeks of employment gap. maybe a few years down the road, but i need to work it all out. his mum said a lot of relatives will be coming home and there will not be anymore space to accomodate me, and that they will be busy with family. what also gets lost in translation i think is that men are not really meant to be “the provider” more than we are meant to be “the hunter”. i get random inspections from child protective services constantly because the county philosophy is that foster care is preferable to a poor single “dad”. “family-oriented includes spending quality time together, celebrating with one another, and supporting each other. as we pointed out in the beginning… we are even willing to die for you (listen to bryan adams…). i don’t think he’s a deadbeat but it does bother me that i make more money than he does and that he doesn’t pay for really anything we do… there are some times that he does pay for things and it shocks me which kind of makes him mad but really i wasn’t expecting it so the shock is genuine. however, he lost his job shortly after we married, deciding to drop out of college and change his career path. some bright spark got the idea that having more than the next guy & controlling him was a good idea. i feel like i keep waiting for him to be more financially secure and i am continuing to work overtime to keep the bills paid, but i feel resentful. one, is that poor men who have good looks are given the same message as poor women, to marry up. my house is tiny and in need of some at present unaffordable repairs, but it’s paid for, and the old ford minivan we have is a bit rusty and more than half my age, but it too is paid for and reliable. for poor men, they have to give up their testicles to marry up, but i know half a dozen who could care less about their testicles, they want money. a guy can be the most caring and loving guy in the world but if he doesn’t earn enough money for a woman’s liking, even if combined they have enough to live comfortably it’s perfectly acceptable for him to kick him out. does the chairman of the board have to be the one that made the money? its been two years since he graduated, and still not hired in his field. i did everything to support his career growth and moves. first, please try to take as much care of yourself physically and intellectually as you can squeeze in. i have a very lucrative job and am well on my way to pay off my mortgage 10 years early and early retirement. now i am in a legal battle with his family just to have 50% of the sale of our joint property, which i’ve paid into with steady work, for 10 yrs. so the issue is more about society as a whole more than a difference between males and females. since he doesn’t have a lot of money most of the time he does do sweet things we wall again he finds us free things to do then i really actually pretty neat or we go to matinees stay-at-home want to movies things like that. i have a boyfriend who is just about making ends meet, and it’s very stressful for me. so when the two of you got together, was there any talk of expectations, other ways to be supportive if not financially, etc. making sure i leave something clear, what i used to do at the beginning, to pay for the movies or the nights out, i stopped doing it 2 months after we were together. but today, do not tell me that one with lots does not love it. equality of pay has meant ithat is perfectly viable for the woman to be the breadwinner nowadays. make matters worse, he has a kid from a previous relationship. wouldn’t a woman who makes her own money be less likely to be a “gold-digger”? even so, there are plenty people who are more than willing to step you into the ground to advance themselves, but not in a fair’s fair contest. have a full time stable job and rent my own place. i can never understand how people manage to relate money to love. women thing, so blaming one gender or the other is useless and solves nothing (if there’s a problem, let’s solve it together, not finger point!"of the 75 percent of women who had problems with dating a man without a job, only about 33 percent said that unemployment was a deal breaker that cannot be overlooked, but a generous 43 percent said they would consider dating someone who was unemployed only if he was "getting back on track" to securing employment. it just seems like one thing happens and then another thing happens. he does not even see the value of giving in the church. got a job soon after & decided to move out & get my own place because i didnt want to lean on her & plus pride & im an introvert when im not being the life of the party, so i like having me time. a man who isn’t contributing financially is a handicap, as one young single mother says in promises i can keep: why poor women put motherhood before marriage: “what was his purpose? now, i’ve learned to listen to my gut- i could have avoided a doomed marriage, a drawn out divorce because my exhusband did not want it ( even though nothing got better) and a rebound relationship. i worked full time and when to school full time simultaneously to finish my degree. he said that he has already hurt me when he left, and now he is still hurting me for being so far away. anyhow, i think it is something to consider when choosing a mate but i also think it’s important to consider what they bring overall to the relationship. low self esteem is not comfortable and is wearing on both. anxiety as well because i don’t want to end up having to support him. a mid twenties guy with a low and unstable income myself right now, i agree with this article. i will have a stable career that makes an average 30k+ salary once i finish post-grad. we both have the same degree, the problem is that he just has no luck finding a proper job. i just thing that he is living a dream and i am more realistic. but the reasoning behind breaking up with him was not due to money. together 16 years until cheated coworker and moved out of state leaving me to raise boys.’s nice when a man is close with his mother, but if she knows where you are 24-7 or is snuggling in-between the two of you on movie night, you’ll feel more like a sibling than a significant other (been there, dated that). it actually pitted the genders against one another and created gender confusion. make it look good, perhaps have some freshly bought groceries in the car with you, frozen items look the most convincing, and make sure you have made some future plans, perhaps an upcoming vacation in a week or two on a calendar at home. romans thought that the love women could offer men was merely second rate – and merely based on temporary, conditional factors. however, it is natural for a man (most) to have instincts that motivate his sense of purpose – to be the provider, bread winner, protector of his family. i tell him how i feel he gets angry a dont knw if its a sign of hm nnot wanting a future bright with me or what pls help me or maybe he things bcs he is youger than me him job is to sleeps with me if i denies him sex he gets angry pls help i want to knw if maybe im being too hard to him or what. i’m 54, financially secure, own my own home, have a high-paying job.[…] this: 15 dating habits that are creepy unless the other person finds you attractive read this: don’t marry your man if he lacks these 4 traits read this: 22 extremely satisfying things that can only happen after age 22 cataloged […]. i tried to help him job hunt, i let him know i was in his corner and wasn’t going anywhere as long as he was faithful, honest, loyal and loving towards me but to no avail; he took out all his woes on me and enough was enough therefore it had to end. reading men, naaaaw, you think you are but how many times will you admit…what you though you saw, wasn’t what you thought. snubbing these self entitled, self absorbed, narcissitic sociopaths is the highlight of my day and i recomend that every attractive man in this country indulge in this practice as often as possible. i had a stable job before that, for 3 years, until the financial crisis and merger closed by department. as a man ain’t you shy that your wife , girl friend or fiancée is feeding you, clothing you ,paying rents and every other thing for you. then it took forever for the company to higher him and when he finally got hired, come to find out that selling life insurance, you only get paid if you sell. he left me suddenly for a woman who has no money or means to help financially. increasingly pushing me out of her life, because now i was living on savings, watching every dollar going out. the irony is that – especially with all the domestic skills i’ve been practicing basically daily over the past decade – i’d accept being the sahd in a marriage with a career woman (i trained as a historian; we’re paid in pittances anyway) in a heartbeat!, so many of these guys with their boo hoo hoo sob stories. of a bit worried after reading this article, i am not the smartest person there is, i know i’m not going to go out there and become an architect or a lawyer or anything. if he’s getting up early, networking and pounding the pavement, he deserves your full support. at times it feels like he gets all my benefits for free. it’s not selfish to sit around and expect your partner to support you…but only if you’re a male and the one supporting you is a female…. however, that should not equate to the worth of a person. people who have spent their time relentlessly working their way to get somewhere…these people have every right to decide not to date a person who wants to spend the day watching tv instead of working. i care but i dont want to commit to a broke man. for some men, the “he who has the gold makes the rules” theory precludes them from being in a loving, respectful relationship with a woman who has greater earnings than they do. there are many women who don’t care about a man’s portfolio and poower and there are many men who don’t care about a woman’s age and external beauty — those are the people who are happily forming partnerships that are deeply satisfying., it’s ok to love someone but you are not responsible for fixing that person’s problems. love is when you care more about another person then you do your own self. while here, this is what many (mega) churches play on. when a female takes care of the house and supported financially, it’s seen as babysitting the male. does it matter that your memories are of lies & abuse & other women etc?” i work hard for my financial freedom to buy whatever i want and do the things i want to do, not to support a grown man’s habit. i remained single for years, during which time i purchased my own home, and maintained it with my own hands., know that men with this attractive leadership, managerial jobs, ambition are more likely to do what i mentioned above..i mean, i can manage my money, my man should be able to manage his as well. fuck if i know, but just dont give up your life over a horse i almost did, and i regret it., etc, did a lot more damage then the fact that women want to work (unless you want us to be “gold-diggers”). how much are you willing to sacrifice for your family, how much is he? i know that is contrary to a lot of what i have been seeing, but i have been looking around so much, and it is all i have been seeing from so many posts on many different sites, greed, not security or stability. now, (i hope) you know that if a man freaks out on the waiter, he’s likely going to do the same to you, and those men who hate all of their exes? you have food, a place to live, a job, and a little extra change in your pocket, and a man who loves and cares about you, nothing else matters. decorating is not an issue as i am creative and resourceful. they worked until the day they physically couldn’t anymore, then we’re taken care of by their loving family until they died. knew i should have run for the hills when i had to pay the bill on our first date, but i wanted to give the guy a chance; and no, he’s not doing anything to try to improve his situation. get over yourself, you’re probably not as great as you think you are. mean it’s not like he doesn’t have a job. he seems to be perfectly content making just enough to get by and it’s that lack of drive and desire to improve his standings that bothers me. i’m feeling a little bad for myself at this point, for wasting 5 minutes of my life (which i’ll never get back by the way) replying to your idiotic, masochistic post. still lives at home (38 y/o and i’m 33)…he has far too many obligations to do anything thoughtful for me (besides house dates, the occasional fast food, dates at a chain restaurant or plying me with alcoholic beverages that i demanded to get me through those many days and nights of staying over at his full house). i would not imagine a second dumping a woman who is genuine and nice if she was not making enough money. sure i’m a good looking guy but, for some reason the less interested in women i become the more attractive i seem to be to them. i’m struggling with what to do, whether to continue in this relationship or not. i also have no problem paying for myself on a date or treating him from time to time. much money we or someone else can make or have? not with money, but with his loyalty and kindness to me. now that i’m at midlife, however, and helping to get two kids through college, hoping to retire one day, and dealing with the never-ending costs of living (my broken clavicle cost me a lot of money, despite my health insurance, and my car appears to have an electrical problem, no doubt a pricey problem, that i need to deal with asap), i think about money a wee bit more.. you don’t know how much this resonates with me. although his family has a lot of money, and we benefited from it with extravagant gifts, trips, an weekends at their country house, my “partner” could never seem to hold down a job for very long, and was also abusive. who say “money isn’t everything” have most likely never had to spend countless nights awake worried about how they are going to feed their children or pay their next gas bill. the funniest thing about it all is that the closest thing in our society to resemble an actual “alpha” is law enforcement officers, and they are sworn to enforce rules to protect the rich “betas” that made the rules in the first place. it’s not: is your man always having work problems or making excuses to stay unemployed until he finds the “perfect” job? its a fact, that women are many times more likely to stay with a sick man, than the other way around, many women find their husbands walk out on them in a health crisis. which means there are people with anxiety or who have compassion for those with anxiety who will be interested in connecting with others with a similar situation. and, when you do leave, you might feel lonely or alone for a little while, but after a short time you will be so glad you left him. will any woman give a broke 40 something man with 4 small children even the time of day?, the biggest and best thing you can do for yourself is get out of the mindset that you’re not smart (you are! he does work and now lives on his own although he lives in apartment that has my name on it that i sublease to him because he has not so good credit. beyond that, this comment resonated with me: “i’m not the smartest person so i’m not going to be able to go out and get some flash high rolling career but i would like to earn more money, problem is due to my i suppose social anxiety the thought of going to uni or something like that scares the hell out of me. that type of debt is not good and i would avoid him like the plague. heck, i even would pay for our dates & petrol for her car which i wouldnt drive (not mine so…), bought her presents & strawberry cheese cakes & was the best boyfriend on earth. prefer to be single and poor than to be partnered and poor. it is completely possible to be trapped, and in bad circumstances despite your best efforts and through no fault of your own. and you do this by not giving your money and trust away.
Dating secrets: 10 red flags and other secrets women need to know i now see that this man is not motivated enough to sort his problems out even with my support he is still getting deeper and deeper in debt but when i offer ideas for solutions, he agrees but does not follow them through without a rocket up his ars*. the ones who choose so called “poor guy” are probably content or dare i say… happy & will never find this article & comment (or if her & hubby are reading this, will not respond). it is important to recognize these warning signs before it's too late. he lies to himself about what he did and i just feel pity that he cannot wake up to the reality of who he has become….
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