Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 4 months
Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2 months
sex until you both take down your profiles and agree to be exclusive. i have checked a few times by searching users on pof and each time i see his profile it says he has been on that day. and even then it feels like his help is dwindling. he says he cares for me, likes being with me, and likes the way things are but i don’t think he’s committed to me. its called self control or let her go find someone who will value himself and her enough to not open those tempting emails and winks. i struggled with myself whether to bring it up or not about what i had found out, but then i decided to confront him. oh, and he officially asked me to be his girlfriend in february. after how many days of not reacting at all should i consider that he might just broke up and took the easy way out by disappearing? we are planning a tropical vacation in a few months, we’ve taken several weekend trips together, we’ve brought up the subject of moving in together if he doesn’t get sent away, and i’m seriously falling for him. live in hope that not everyone is the same and that there are genuine men out there. i’m happy to say i accomplished all those things and with support from my best friend, decided to start dating again – but i was certainly not looking for a relationship or to get serious. if a woman continued intereacting with men she was meeting online, the man she’d been planning a future with wouldn’t dismiss it as innocent. it seemed as if we were back to where we were 🙂 but something got me curious and so i went on the same website that we met on thre years ago and there he is on line that day. i’m really freaked out about commitment – i love this guy and have a relationship with him like no other, he accepts everything about me, he adores me, is kind, gentle and makes it his daily goal to do things that make me happy. and i don’t feel like i wanna see others either. start small and work your way up if you’re truly afraid you’ll come on too strong. when he tried to confirm, i told him i hade forgotten we had a date and promised lunch to a friend. i don’t get why he texts me those things saying what he says and then not give me the time of day. a guy checking his dating profile isn’t always a sign that he’s unhappy and based on your agreement i guess it’s fine for him to do so. we started off as being friends with each other and now started dating but he never mentioned about being exclusively but when i check the dating site each day he seems to be on it very often as i am very confused as to why when he informed me that he is my boyfriend and still looking for someone else. forward to today……the last month and a half, we have been spending a lot more time together…. am currently in a similar situation and have learned to take a step back as soon as the self-doubt steps in. i told him that it hurt to see him on the site and that i felt that everything was going good and i did not understand why he was on. and he announces to them that we are moving in together. i told him that if he had indicated all he wanted to do was date around, i’d never have gone out with him because i was looking for something more serious. he said his profile was up but that he hadn’t been checking it and he hadn’t found time to take it down. he's great and has treated me properly the whole time. and then he said “i’m not sure i see it going anywhere. he went back to work after vacation and they'd made some changes for the worse while he was gone. i felt him touching me inappropriately and i told him no! met at a video game tournament for about ten minutes and got along well, so we added each other on facebook. we hit it off straight away and i instantly felt so comfortable with him. i get that idea and if he were actively looking to meet new people i could even agree…but if he’s only logging in to respond to new emails why not remove the profile so all those women don’t have to “work hard” in the first place? just wanted some suggestions from you about moving on or should i still date him as it really bothers me and also when he tells me that he doesn’t know what he really wants. i've been friends with a great guy for a little over a year. but i knew i had to be supportive and not dwell on my fears, so i did the best i could to cheer him up and not burden him with my worries. met a guy online from okc in january 2014, i was evicted 6 weeks afterwards for violating my lease after letting family members stay with me. i had spoken to him several months before we met. once i texted him he was quick with his response and asked me to come over to his suburb. i relaxed and began to enjoy the journey, tentatively falling a little by little for him. he told me that i really hurt him and that it will take some time to repair the hurt.?Recently, i started dating a man i began to realise i really really liked. i confronted him about it and told him how much it confused me and hurt me, since i thought we were still good, and that he wanted things to work out. cause unfortunately in my world if you like me, well that makes one of us. since we see each other daily (he gets mad if we don’t) i just don’t know how to deal with this anymore and its taking its toll on me. i guess my thought is that some more time together could help convince you both that it’s a good match (or not) and then all the wondering wouldn’t be required. i think that because we started as friends and then transitioned into casually hooking up, all that pretense was gone. we met on a dating website, and the relationship took off right from the start. i look today and it’s back up with modifications? i once heard a comedian say, the reason people marry another is because subconsciouly they think ” she/he is the best i can do for where i am in my life or for my leage” when i heard it, it was a funny but it definitely has some truth to it.. i regret so much to this day how i didn't understand, and how from there on out our 'relationship' never was the same, even from before we dated, the friendship broke down. we chat and video call at least thrice a week. started talking to a girl for around 2 weeks, we met on a dating website and have been talking daily. i have never done that before especially on a first date. he said he was so glad i was with him and he was so happy. he drops the convo after a few of my questions of interest and a congrats on what he accomplished. i have to add that i am 41 and he is 36, but he said he doesn’t care and neither do i. however there are more things apparently he’s saying that i didn’t tell him “i love him” during sex which was odd to me because i have in the past, i even brought him breakfast the last time i saw him…. agree with the advice here – especially the timing – and acknowledge that girls tend to overeact in these matters of the heart so maybe we could all do with a bit of advice to slow down a bit. and quickly does not mean that you are closed off to love,Fisher argued, but that you are trying to learn as much about a. my advice in this blog isn't to stay in a relationship that doesn't make you happy. if it’s not, you might want to have a more direct conversation regarding it…. i understand his schedule because of his work demands as a nurse, but there’s this feeling inside me that makes me feel a bit sad and worried because it’s been almost a week since he last called me. he said that he finds me very pretty and hot. i am a little upset so a few days i set up a fake profile with photos of another friend he has never met and messaged him. should i just chalk it up to experience and walk away? i didn’t evern take him seriously on the date (even though i thought he was hot), i was joking too much to get rid of him but he seemed to like me alot and wanted to see me more.’ve been seeing this guy a little over 3 months now. i also thought it was kind of weird but i felt that if he was okay with me seeing where he was and i had nothing to hide then there shouldn’t be a problem. if a woman had emailed me after i met my wife, i probably would have looked at the profile even though i knew i’d met “the one”…i think sometimes it’s more about wanting to know who was interested in you as opposed to pursuing them. he is in the army and when we first met he only had a couple days before he went to do a month worth of training. i replied next morning and told him i had other plans since i thought we were on a break. i think you should let him know that in the next few months you need the relationship to change: either he needs to fully commit or the two of you need to go your separate ways. was feeling unsure (trust issues from being cheated on 2 out of 3 boyfriends) and so i created a “fake” profile (something i am not very proud of). met a guy on a dating website about 3 weeks ago, and ever since then (tons of long emails back and forth), we’ve been really attached., often online dating doesn’t match the real world and i think that in some cases waiting for the commitment/respect to happen naturally is going to be a frustrating experience. i feel that it is his way of letting me know that he is not doing anything behind my back and is totally honest. for the last few months this has been by far the question i’ve received most often from readers. he claims a friend must have hacked his account as a joke and that he still wants stuff to work. today morning his picture is public again and he’s been online every hour 🙁 i have deactivated my account since i don’t want to bother with it. i care about him so much and i yet i have my reservations about him. i recently confronted him about a woman on his facebook that was posting pics of him and about how much she loves him. don’t know what to do at this point – my friends say just lay low, wait it out, don’t contact him anymore and see what happens – my gut is leading me into the mindset that he found someone else while i was away, or just decided he went too fast and is now backing off way too much. only problem is that i now trust no-one and everyone i meet on the net is suspect, although now i keep my profile up (even though i do not use it) so at least they know i my profile is still active. he visited me one weekend (stayed in a hotel), i visited him the following weekend (stayed with him), two weekends pass and he came to visit me again this past weekend. think that many guys who use internet dating think of it as a “smorgesbord” and feel that it is their right to taste everything on offer!!First off let me say that many men keep their profiles active even though they are interested in the woman they are regularly dating. he left he kissed me on my forehead & cheeks before the lips. he answered back telling me that he knew i’d been online too. good thing is, it doesn’t sound like you’re approaching this situation in a demanding sort of way. he agreed that he did too, and things were good. he met his wife using online dating and has been giving advice and helping people improve their results since 2007. i don’t want to tell him i know about the profile because even if he appologises and deletes it. but it was shocking to see what all he had been doing during that time and i was completely in the dark about it. i never have given him a hard time about being less attentive the past few weeks. i do think that’s enough time for him to know where he stands. after 6 weeks of talking non stop via text, a few phones calls a week, and seeing each other no less than once a week i brought up the “where is this going” talk…. so, i asked “why do you have the profile up when you know it bothers me this way? i have a question, i have been dating a guy that i was introduced to by my sister. the next day he says he went online and couldn’t find me. tell him if he’s going to continue posting that he is single and updating his site, that you are too and you are also going to start seeing other people. i also think if she didn’t respond the way i wanted i might put my profile back up. it is being wise and mature to set clear concise boundaries to value and protect your emotional sexual health. you brad we had a talk and it turns out he doesnt go on it and didn’t realise he had left it, he didnt think it was an issue. all this bull about the guy being scared of commitment and just being a guy is bull crap. i feel like i’m just there and he is still looking for something better and it makes me feel bad. am just so scarred to bring my feelings or the site thing up……. now the only reason i knew to look and see if he was on there was this gut feeling that i got. she later said she would do the same and we took off the auto-renewal but we both never bothered to hide our profiles. unfortunately a "friend" leaks to my boyfriend about the other guy.’m confused because things haven’t changed since we met., it's really common for friends to be "over" protective and give that kind of advice. i took my profile down and never asked him if he did or not. we met on a dating site and i knew when we started dating his profile was hidden ( i wanted to show my friends who he was but couldnt find it! even after three discussions and several screenshots as well as telling him how to delete his account and how to bury his cookie email tracks, he still could not resist. i was very worried because i knew that as an army soldier, deployment is always imminent. its a similar situation to the above scenarios – he really has his act together and has made it very clear that he is sure that he wants me in his life (so he doesn’t say anything like “i’m not sure” or “i can’t commit”).?Also since posting this, we’ve had more discussions, all of which have been helpful.?Any suggestions on how to deal with this now am i just wasting my time and just move on? we had been together for almost 10 years, and i had never been with anybody else. i’m just trying to have a clear perspective on this.
Ive been dating my boyfriend for 4 months
on, my now boyfriend and i started dating and it was casual dating for both of us., you’ll probably want to check out my previous advice on this topic. there is no cure but an expensive therapist to sit with you for several sessions for emotional damage – to help re establish your self worth and value that was destroyed by one person who had the audacity to demand no expectations while you jump to his cool as heck laid back beat. i think you’d be better off talking about it now (assuming you can’t stop worrying) than waiting another four months and being miserable with concerns. i decided the other day to go on and delete my profile since we’ve declared each other ‘mine’. find out how i failed at first but then had great success with online dating – download my free 100+ page online dating guide ebook today! conversations got deeper, a bond grew, and suddenly sex turned into feelings. i was really upset (also was pmsing) and asked if i had been wrong in assuming we were exclusive. i told him if i ever considered dating another man i would be honest. we are open about everything and there is no judgment..Match study also found that, while online daters have sex more. he still makes updates to his site and says he is single and “looking for long term and short term dating. low and behold, he had been online sometime in the last week, and had added new pictures. again, i calmly asked him about this, and he seemed genuinely confused. obviously the profile is not “just there” and obviously its not there for his friend’s use because he is putting up pics of himself and updating his own info. they feel it lets him know that he can’t treat me like that, and i am being to “nice. he said ‘no’, he said he had posted those pictures to see if i would notice, and because he was curious to know if i had been online lately, which he saw that i hadn’t. i am just going to start dating other people and not even worry about it. everyone and a while i would get on his phone or computer and check..he wasn’t being extra sweet to me in his texts…one night from my hidden account i looked on match and noticed he had his profile up, he even uploaded a picture i took of him. and if the car situation didn’t exist, is it likely you’d find another reason to worry? he kissed me and looked at me for a second and said, “hell no!, as i’m getting this question more and more often, i’m hoping the details i’ve included here can help you reach the point where he realizes there is no reason for him to keep his profile active any longer., this guy may not even be thinking about his profile and might be totally confused if you disappeared. i desired a more serious relationship because i really, really liked him and the sex was really, really good. he calls me every good name in the book, such as “baby”, “my girl”, and the works..Hi lauren, i've been seeing a guy for 8 months now and have not heard a word from him for 5 straight days. i feel as though you don’t care about the way i feel and that makes me wonder…. he hides his friends list on facebook and has changed his relationship status from “single” to hidden since he asked me to be his gf. he said he could ask me the same thing and that i had blown up his phone all day until it died. doesnt seem like he is committing to the relationship or caring about my feeling the past few days. i am shook up, but don't want to lose the other guy so we carry on talking and spend some completely innocent (no kissy-business) time together. then even though my fake profile kept telling him i wasn’t interested he kept asking telling me i (real me) was ok with this since he’d been ‘honest’ with me. do not trust online dating anymore too many bad experiences and too many shady characters.’m friends with this guy and we really get along. check out my response to ettejay for another perspective on the mixed signals thing. he probably doesnt even kno that i love him or that i still want a relationship with him cos i try hard to act calm and cool with everything…. from my snooping, it seems that he’s been talking to another guy that day i wrote that message. he also said he has friends he talks to but no one that he is seeing or dating. their health, patience, and willingness to listen to your needs. and he said that we are always together and i am always there, so he just started loving me i guess. in the beginning we talked about being interested in each other, yet if someone comes along whomakes us happier then we would understand as lon as we were honest with each other. he said that i have trust issues and that he is not doing anything or talking to anyone else. i contacted him on last friday via a friendly text, and he called me back on saturday morning but i was retained when he called. i texted him yesterday and he said that he “saw” my text but was “super busy and forgot”. we have fun when we’re together but i just don’t know if i should trust him. i told him i wasn’t upset but that it weirded me out and i need a partner i can trust. then, he has been trying to sleep with my with no strings attached and even today he told me he misses me and wants me, but still sees people that he met on the site, but i am the only one he really likes… sure…. though he already told me he wasn’t interested in dating other people, and we had both disabled our profiles a week or two before. – let’s imagine you met my wife and i for dinner. should i be worried or should i just take it easy, breathe, and see how the next 2-4 weeks go? explain how much you enjoyed spending time with her but given how infrequently you are seeing each other and given the fact that she’s still looking online, you feel like you should keep your options open. i have also made myself avaible for this same night. or be laid back and see if we can rekindle things at a later date?!Lets break this down and play the last couple months for you in slow motion so you can see exactly what happened and how it can be done differently in the future, with different results. its been like 2months together and he is really great guy if i have to be honest and i do have my moments too in annoying him too. he told me had a b’day but could manage to meet me for a bit and a drink at 12pm. of dating apps coupled with the rise of more liberated sexual. they can be crazy about you and still want to screw the basement chick. we can’t meet up often because we don’t have cars, so that plays an even bigger role in me worrying. now, having read your dad's books and some other books, i don't believe that necessarily - because of how men are one-track minded and they withdraw and don't want to be around anyone (which he'd said - not even his bro who lives with him). you have agreed to be exclusive, things are easy: you just need to ask him to take it down! he showed me through his actions that he really liked me and arranged for a date. he could’ve at least told me upfront instead of brushing me off and beating around the bush. should i send another update if he did not have any reaction to the previous one? she no longer used the other roommate entrance and decided it was a ok to walk in and chat with him even when i was there all the while shooting me filthy die woman looks., i think you should have been more honest with your guy. we just kind of started having more and more sex, and in the end we figured, why the hell shouldn't we just be together! i think you should (once again) talk to him about making girlfriend/boyfriend official?!Since he stops pursuing you, you naturally feel rejected, unloved and unimportant. do with online dating site, so…what had this punk done? i never saw another email, there were no text from random girls, or phone calls that seemed weird. that weekend we texted each other every day and spoke about every other day, since we both have time consuming jobs. he immediately guessed my name – so guess at this point he’s only seeing me. needless to say, he has trust & commitment issues and i am understanding and patient…. i tried to explain to him i want you to see where i’m coming from, that i was so shocked and hurt that he did that…. we continued to date and then on valentine’s day we broke up officially. i know it’s fair game and it’s just a first date, but i can’t help but think this way. many times she ‘broke up’ with him via text, and then would come over later that day and have sex with him. he’s never given me a reason to not trust him, when we aren’t physically together he calls and tells me where he’s going and what he’s doing, we talk and text daily, and he’s told me that i make him happy. when searching for profiles, my profile said i had been active within 5 days. – it’s very possible that he would change as we don’t really know what’s causing him hesitation from fully committing to just dating you and hiding his profile. later that night i noticed he had taken his profile off and i was very happy. stayed friends, a year later we both wanted sex and started hooking up. i know you may not want to for fear of what the answer will be but in the long run it’s better to know sooner rather than later in my mind. days ago i was having one of those days where i was thinking about it all too much and letting it get to me again. also, ladies, exclusivity is a trap for women and a benefit to men. my friends keep telling me that i shouldn’t let him treat me that way and that it’s not that hard for him to send me a simple text or short call just letting me knows he is busy and thinking of me. feel like many women want the commitment/respect to happen naturally and i understand that desire. we both want to get married, so this site and our culture is the norm for that. started as what i thought would be a one-night stand. next morning, things were fine – he was sweet and attentive.’m definitely not defending what he did (i disagree with it and think it was wrong of him to do so) but you did get a much better response than many women: he removed the profile quickly and i think he was a lot more honest than most guys in admitting that creating it made him feel better. guess i’ll be renewing my membership in the site where i’d met him since i did talk to a couple decent men there despite having had little in common with them but, who knows, maybe i’ll get lucky. brad, do you think what we have now can get more serious – become exclusive and enter into a relationship? he was so into me and i was into him, too., if my wife told me that she put an online dating profile up because she was a pisces…that wouldn’t fly with me! it has been another 2 weeks after that conversation and his profile is still active. have been seeing a man i met online for almost a year now. i also told him that we agreed to be exclusive and that having an active profile tells other women that he is still single and it is disrespectful and unacceptable to me. if he has a pic to send of work he has done on his house something random it is usually only because i texted him something, and i ask a few questions about it because he gives very little description behind it. and never be ashamed to check if that person has lied to you. we were meant to get married next month and now it’s been pushed back to easter. i ended communication with all other guys, hid my profile and gave this guy my full attention because that’s the kind of woman i am. another problem is that a few times he had informed me that he is confused and do not know what he wants in life or keeps on changing his problem which makes me feel so confused and disappointed. and then i saw that he actually had been online in the last 3 or so days. a fear of commitment, soaked with very, very committed conversation and feelings? i told him i’m a straight up woman if he wants to explore to just tell me and that i hoped he finds what hes looking for and someone who loved, respected and appreciated him as much as i did, this set him off right away…. he was like im sorry, i should of told u that i changed it as he was getting lots of messages and girls asking him out, so he decided to change it! it started with us emailing back and forth a few times a day for a couple of weeks, then it progressed to phone calls – some of the calls lasted 4+ hours. so as that sixth week approaches, i think it would be best if you let him know that you’re bothered by his profile still being up and see how he responds. he may have secretly been hoping for a commitment from you after having this conversation and when that didn’t happen he’s now not sure the relationship is going where he had hoped it would. then he got very busy at work and after 6 weeks of spotty contact i told him my feelings were hurt. seems really into me, seems genuinely happy to hang out with me and to really want to hang out but we haven’t had the exclusivity talk and i am honestly not going to go down that road and fish for information for another 2-4 weeks.' we hooked up that evening and had casual sex for two more months before we knew we were really into each other. lauren, i’ve been friends with this guy for 30 years. today comes by and not one text from him all day.***ladies please,i know this is very hard to understand and comprehend and digest, but plain and simple if you have been in a relationship with a guy and it has been over 2 months or so and he has told you that you are exclusive and that he does not want to be with anyone else, yet he still keeps his profile up even after you have confronted him… plain and simple, the guy is not that into you! his job is stressful right now, but in my mind, if you like someone a minute or two to send a quick hello is not a big deal. he opened an email and my friends said he was online within 24 hours. we still caught up on sunday evening and it was lovely.
Dating my boyfriend for 4 months
it’s clear he’s online but not yet dating anyone. i apologised for my amnesia and told him i’d be hanging out with a friend at a pub after work and if he dropped by i could get him a drink to make up. one month down the line he stopped refferring to out future, except he will only speak to me current situation and only refers me as gf. on our last date together back in early september he expressed that he felt like he was being a bad boyfriend and would understand if i wanted to break things off. so i made up another profile to see if he would chat and low and behold, he started chatting and added me as his favourite! lots of dates, exchange of christmas gifts, meeting family and a lot of his friends. i apologised explained i had a boyfriend and he was very gracious about it. many men are seeking wives, not playmates and they’re up front about it because they sincerely don’t want to waste time with women who aren’t interested in long term commitments. they’re both in the same college so and both haven’t returned to the site since that day. i still haven’t come across a problem like mine. were f*ck buddies for about three months and then we started dating. you don’t have to be aggressive when you talk with him about this but i would be direct and ask him straight out where you stand and explain the confusion he’s creating for you. i didn’t really understand how hard you were working and i took it personally. i’d say make a point to sit down with him and ask him where he sees the relationship going. btw, he told me today that he would need my parents’ consent and then we both just changed the subject. have been dating a wonderful woman for over 3 months that i met on match. we got more 'serious' about 3-4 months later when we both realized our feelings for each other were far deeper than we ever thought our relationship would go. if i were in your situation i would feel a mix of hurt and anger. would say let him know how he’s made you feel and then keep your options open to date other guys because at this point it seems like he’s proven that you can’t believe what he says..but between the texts and the online dating profile still being live i am not sure what to do. during those 6+ years, i focused on raising my two sons, building my career, healing and finding myself and my own happiness. shortly after, he had to fly back to australia, where he's from, and we ended up staying in touch. i don’t know if he’s been online or not but should i be worried? i sent one text on that first day, and one on the second day, and decided that was it.. i think it’s all because of the recent stuff with my brother…. and a few times i saw that he had cancelled plans with me, in order to be with her – of course he had lied about why he canceled with me. it seems to be a cultural norm in my social circle; most of my friends' relationships start out casually rather than as serious dating.!) so i thought me and the guy were on the same page, however. i don’t think that means that you should have concerns that you’re being cheated on, but i do think you should have concerns around “why does he feel that he still needs to be checking his dating profile? again 🙂 just clarifying that the part i wrote about him telling his buddy he ‘sort of has a girlfriend’ and that ‘he is trying to behave’, was over a year ago – that conversation did not happen 4 months ago, i got my dates wrong…too much confusion, right! i’d be careful: if he’s now dating another girl and things don’t work out with her, he’s likely to try and come back and make you feel like everything was fine and you were overreacting. but he didn’t pay for my lunch just gave me the change for his coffee. will be so grateful that you've given him the space to do what he needs to do and he will see that he is enough to make you happy. there where little things that happened when we first started dating that i didn’t concern myself with too much at the time, but now i felt like i had to get resolution about those things if i was really going to make a big commitment like this with him. i wish these readers had written me beforehand because this is often the worst approach to take (at least from this guy’s point-of-view). first off, he has significant commitment and some emotional issues. so he can see if he knows someone…and then what? your situation is a little different because it sounds as if he didn’t have a dating profile when you started dating but now he has one (? he says if you can keep your options open, why can’t i’ and i’ve told him several times i don’t want to keep my options open. i’ve lived in a military town my whole life, and i avoided dating military men for that entire reason. have offered her to check my username/password to see that i do not have a subscription, told her to send me winks/emails to test it, want her to check her email message and see if her status changes, offered to call match to show my log on status, and now seeking advice. i expected to see the original profile from when we first meet but this one was different and his profile picture was a picture of him and his daughter that we took after we moved in and decided to take family portraits to hang around the house. when searching for profiles, my profile said i had been active within 5 days. we ended up sleeping together and he spent the night at my place. he’s all over the shop & i can’t handle this roller coaster. frankly, don’t care for it for a multitude of reasons but it has been a good vehicle in which i have met some terrific people. his excuse was he did not have a computer, only his phone to access, and there is no way to deactivate from a mobile device.? anyway we end the goodbye on some jokes and pull funny faces at each other as i drive off. last week, while just hugging and feeling so happy being there, my heart was racing with emotion that it actually startled. it’s so frustrating for me that the website charged him (earlier than they should) and after he had cancelled his sub. i was thrilled to have found something special and i cancelled all of my future dates as soon as i got home from my date with my (someday-to-be) wife. at this point, you can be assured that the minute things calm down he will call you and want to go out with you again. however, if we use your examples of the real world versus online dating (and really a case that you appear to make that they should operate more similarly): if it were the real world instead of online dating wouldn’t you have been more firm that he shouldn’t be talking to another woman/making himself available to other women? met my current boyfriend online a couple months ago, he kept mentioning thing about me being his girlfriend so 2 weeks ago i asked if we were together and he said yes. while i agreed to casual & laid back – and only cos he said he’s just come out of a relationship & doesn’t want something full on (and i have too but i am ready) i did not saying anything about the seeing other ppl business. you other questions on if his story is true or if he was using you for sex…i really have no idea. i want to trust him, and i have… but i found out that he still visits his datig profile regularly. met him on pof in august 2013 and to be honest, i had just started dating again since my divorce 6 1/2 years earlier. so i told him we should try not to bring it up again and that since he’s a mature person i’ll leave it on him. once the “exclusivity” talk came up (from my end): i asked if he was still on that dating site, because i took my profile down about two weeks after we met. but again, maybe i misunderstand what exclusive means in this case. shed some light on thisand please tell me what i should do. after spending the last 5 months with him, i’m decided that i made the right choice. i know i’m reading into it but i’ve been in abusive and bad relationships and i just don’t want to be used and hurt again. valentines weekend was great and on the sunday we ended up talking a bit more frankly about things. said he was hurt that he’d hurt me and that he never had any intention of actually meeting anyone. but then i don't want 'flight' to win i want to fix what happened over the years and be better and show him i can love him through thick and thin. i saw it two days ago i felt sick to my stomach but i decided to not bring it up until my emotions have cooled a bit and i can think rationally. dave – you might try sending her here to see that others have dealt with the problem. i think that’s a great book but it will only help if you take what you learn about each other and apply it. retain some reality, because being online is so surreal and the rules of engagement so different to real life that some surely find it unbalancing. monday i texted him and we texted the whole day. a lot of guys (this one included), the clarity at which a woman is able to say something exists isn’t clear to us at all (and i speak as a married man who has conversations like this from time to time with an exasperated wife who just doesn’t understand why i don’t get the obvious). a healthy normal relationship should consists of time together and time apart. if he can’t answer where you stand after your first conversation don’t go and demand to know by such-and-such a date. we have yet to have a real exclusivity talk and have not talked about our dating profiles. will associate your name with the guilt he is feeling for not calling you, and the irritation he is feeling because he's trying his best and obviously failing at making you happy. i hope we can remain friends but understand if you don’t! also said she wasn’t one for dating sites ( no sense) and if a guy was to try and talk to her she would say she was dating someone. we havent spoken properly about this as this was late last night and when i rang i woke him. if that doesn’t explain enough, i texted him once and he didn’t respond. there wasn't much of an 'a-ha' moment or discussion about becoming an item; we pretty much just started referring to each other as 'boyfriend/girlfriend' about a month and a half into it. we've been together for 3 1/2 years since that first night and are still going strong. i know at one point after we first met, he told me he wasn’t just sleeping around with anyone and everyone. i’m not too sure because he was willing to have a baby with me if i let him, deff not ready now! continued seeing each other and finally i just told him that i had made it clear in my profile that i was seeking a long term relationship and that he had indicated that in his profile as well. i’ve talked to a lot of women where this type of situation can drag on for months only to see the man start dating another woman. after three weeks i told him i felt disrespected and asked him if he was avoiding me because we had been intimate. i texted him and said that i think if he wants to take this relationship seriously as he says (kids, marriage, moving in together, etc) then it’s probably a good idea to delete the profiles. during that weekend we spent a lot of time walking around in the town where he lives, we had lunch and dinner in one of his favorite restaurants, and generally had a great time. if you can figure out how to log in, update with new pics and stuff, you can figure out how to do other stuff. texted me when he was out with friends, letting me know where he was and that he would call me once he got home etc. he goes to this site and changes his status without thinking about his profile text and logs out. he’s mentioned having a vested interest in me, has talked about future (unplanned) visits, we text daily and talk almost every night. he said that he wants to continue dating me and that he wants to work on things. he has had it rough…a lot of ups and downs with his ex who has refused to let him see his babygirl. ok he says, let’s talk about it, then we get interrupted by one of the kids and never come back to the topic. i was listening to music and watching him talk to friends.” so obviously, i creeped today and you can see (even if you’re not a member with a profile) if a username of a profile exists. he didn’t say marriage, but his intentions are long term with me and he is excited to see a long term future together. i could see that most of the time he would try to set up a date with her first, and then me when she couldn’t. i then asked if he was still on the dating site and he said yes. true, we did not discuss what sleeping together meant, but i did not think it was necessary to have the same conversation i might have had with a 30-year-old. i told her i recently gotten an email and deleted it but i have not been on in a long time. curious of anyone’s thoughts on this…been going out with a guy i met online. that moment i realised i really do have feelings for this guy. i’m headed to a wedding across country and he’s not happy with the fact that i have a date. he was very interested in asking me about my life, my opinions, my family, my experiences and he genuinely seemed to care and to want to listen.’m not sure i follow cathy – did you meet him a long time ago on a dating site but now he’s forgotten? my membership came to an end shortly after we started emailing and i chose not to renew – i’m now off of the site, and he knows this. i told him earlier today that i had deleted my profile, “just to let him know”. in fact, he has since told me that he is actually glad i went through his phone and handled it the way i did with him (holding him accountable to it, ready to dump his butt, but didn’t attack him like the tasmanian devil). my advice is simply that if you want to make things work with a man who is temporarily busy with a project, then fyi's are the way to go. so i didn't argue - just said i was confused and that i wasn't wanting serious yet either and not sure why he thought i was. he didn’t like it at all and only thought of me. i started talking to a guy in dec and we hit it off. it was identical to the match account he had (still has actually, but there’s been no activity for months). you say to find someone who makes things easy for me — but relationships are not easy, and if they are, they aren’t real. he has met my family and gets along great with them, i have met his mom and some of his friends. i’d say that long of “exclusive” dating should be long enough for someone to know if they’re ready for that step. he said he wasn’t doing any of that on purpose and i was wrong to think he was intentionally doing those.
Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 6 months
however, 2 months ago he broke up with his girlfriend and after a drunken night out he tried to kiss me. at this time he posted that he was “single” on ok and so did i., we went camping last week and i noticed he was texting another girl while i was curled up next to him but i didnt say anything, i didnt really see what they were talking about it but it made me kinda concerned. i stopped answering and next time i saw him i asked him if he was still on the site and he answered and said: “yes im still on there and actually last week someone messaged me on there, and i’m pretty sure it was you. – it sounds to me like she’s keeping her options open and i’d recommend you do the same. after a couple of weeks i told him that i had deactivated my profile and he told me that he had cancelled his subscription. im not sure what site i met him on or if he is even on a dating site now. i know, because i have a friend that is on the same dating site and she keeps me updated, unfortunately. exactly the same thing happened to me with them – and at the time i tried contacting them, but i was ignored. so it’s been three weeks now since we agreed to be exclusive but he still have his profile up and checking it. i confronted him about it and said that it bothers me that you still have your profile up on match. that he appreciates how respectful i was of what he had going on, but he doesn't want to let me down and can't be in a serious full-time relationship now. i had wanted to be with my current boyfriend a few months into our hooking up. plenty of guys will lie and lie and lie when caught. i recently met a man i like very much – we met for drinks/appetizers, had a great time, lots of laughter and connection, nice goodnight kiss as well.. we are both full time parents and work full time. curiousity always killed the cat and i checked to see if he was still active a couple weeks ago and he was. i know that he is really busy and it is not just an excuse. he said he had in the past gone from one serious relationship to another and wants to see what dating around is like. he says he doesn’t want to rush things and does not just want to date anyone, he is dating to find someone to marry and wants to be sure. he says that while all that was going on and he was dealing, that if he was really serious he would've still wanted to see me all the time while dealing with the bad stuff.” however, like this article says, men don’t even realize that this can seem disrespectful and hurtful. a couple of weeks went by and he still hadn’t taken it down. we saw each other at least once on the weekend and would text, email, im and phone throughout the week. then texts me about getting together to hang out and also we need to celebrate my birthday. i’d suggest you suggest to him that you meet out his way – if he responds positively and wants to meet, things are probably fine. after work he did call me and told me that they are being deployed to turkey for about 50-90 days. he refuses to let our relationship status to be known publicly and i’m not allowed to post pics of us together on my facebook and tag him nor make it known that we’re together.'m sure i did sign up for the emails :-) it's been a whole week now i've not heard form him so i guess it is time to forget him. 6 months into the relationship, i told him i needed a break – that seeing him searching for the next best thing (as i saw it) was hurting me. a week into these more serious feelings i came clean, and shortly after we began dating officially. he say’s ok, but another few weeks go by and nothing. to be honest the site was for marriage purpose, i have been in there for some time and gave up hope. i think these are all good things and he did give me a heads up well in advance and still wants to meet. i’ve been dating this guy i met on pof for 3mts now. a couple of weeks ago, i think it sank in with me how fast we were moving and i asked him for some time for me to think. a few days after i posted, he and i went to lunch and had a serious talk about it. my current boyfriend and i were dating for about three months before we 'made it official,' i. but we started spending more time talking and really just spending time with each other (in between the sex). on the other hand he stepped out of a 10 year old non-working relationship because of me and i know that his ex girlfriend is still nagging him in text messages continuously. i was on my way home when he texted & told me where he was late on friday. and that’s most often how the “real” world works: the days of grade school where we are forced to ask someone to “go steady” are behind us. and just to make it clear, my sister isn’t creating suspicion with me, i’d noticed how all along, he’d be texting me and suddenly stop with no goodnight, see ya, nothing, just stopped in mid conversation. i find this truth out many many months after dating when she kept walking up into his house and always there when i came over. everything is great so far, we go out for dinner, watched movies, sometimes just stay in his apartment and ordered pizza and cuddle on the couch and watched a movie. i recently signed up on another website and have been looking at other prospects because i feel even though i care about him, i don’t want to put all my eggs in one basket if he is unsure of me as well. – would you feel comfortable telling him you want to take your profile down and ask him if he would do the same? and this was the first time in my life that i had actually dated a variety of men at the same time. if he can’t give you a straight answer, tell him where you’d like the relationship to go and ask him what he thinks of that. my situation he is now an ex for a reason. or do i take my friend's advice, criticize him, give him an ultimatum which will probably end the relationship? and hes always cslling me, we spend every moment together that we can. comment, “i wish my brain would just stop” reminds me of advice my dad gave me when i was growing up: often the best way to get over someone is to find a new someone. i recently signed up under a fake profile and tried to wink and favor him. i haven’t said one word about it since but i am wondering how long to wait. he even tried again slightly to connect, but i was so hurt from previous and not healed i took my previous hurt out on him some more.! this happened to me after being in an exclusive relationship for 14 months. we said 'i love you' about three weeks in, and now six months later i've moved in for a year (working in the industry before returning to school). he actually messaged a friend asking if she wanted to chat and that she was the only woman he was talking to. actually i have some of my toiletries in his bathroom and he’s fine with that. he told me he would remove his profile and that he was so sorry he upset me. so based on my observation i am assuming that he was checking his profile for a minute or two then logged out. he had mentioned getting marrired and i told him he was crazy.-night stand off of tinder turned out to be the most amazing person i have ever met in my life. since i feel that really good advice would require me to understand the relationship on some personal level, i can’t tell you exactly how to approach the situation. he says wow u look jus like my friend, are you her! my friends think i need to drop this whole situation, but he was in my life for so long, i did. were best friends, hooked up with each other on and off for about six months, then developed feelings. since then i have been the happiest girl on earth and i am so in love i have never been. he said that he had taken his match account down, and i believed him. is fabulous to have a weeded out process available in this day but the downside is evident. a couple of days passed and i sent him a text about how we should start off on a new page. was noticing a few things even when i’d be around his neck of the woods and invite him to join me and my friends he wouldn’t. 3 weeks of talking he came to visit me for the weekend, and there was no nervous or uncomfortable feeling between us, just really had an amazing time. i do have some advice but let’s first look at one reader’s email and user this as an example for better understanding where you stand with your guy:My issue comes with him still having his profile up, and with my curiosity getting the best of me, i check almost everyday just to see when he last logged on – seems to be every few days or so. what strikes me as odd is that, having been told that days of silence leaves me confused, he has proceeded to ignore me for the longest period ever. i told him it was iffy and i had hidden my profile because i’m not sure about it all together. i know you can hide your profile when you have an active subscription because i’ve done it so don’t let him try to convince you he can’t do that either. he even used it last night, and i just dont know what to do about it. that’s how things went for my wife and i when we met online. initially he asked me out first few times and then ive been doing it since. were casual for about six months, then they got pretty serious pretty fast. i then said: ” i am the other girl” the look on his face was priceless especially when he realised that all of the stuff he had written (and there was pages and pages of very intimate stuff) was all sent to me.! hope you have a great day and enjoy it – you deserve it! each time i saw/found out my guy went online after going out with me for a while i felt sick, duped, confused about where i stand, no longer confident about how he felt about me or what i thought the relationship was, suddently totally insecure and worst of all foolish…. that said, she is regularly active on match and i’m a bit concerned putting myself out there with her she may not be ready more given the whole cheating matter she had to deal with. where has all the trust gone, now i feel he’s been doing this the entire length of our relationship? i thought everything was great his parents know all about me i’ve met his friends and some family. he had cancelled his membership (and told me he was doing this) about 3 weeks ago. along with many of my personal friends have reiterated your story to me through tears and hugs. have the same story as above, i started dating this guy a month ago. and then he texted me out of the blue and said he was drinking not too far from where i live and was wondering if we could meet up to which i said no way cause i had plans and he was bummed about my answer. yesterday morning i checked again and it said ‘online now’ to say i felt sick was an understatement but i didn’t want to go wading in and accuse him when i didn’t know the story. whenever he said he would call or text, he did, and in situations when he was held up, he would always let me know. he kept his profile online and then during a period where he was busy he removed the profile. he accused me of lying and sleeping around and when he found out it was not true he never apologised as it was his opinion. i told him he shouldn’t be taking his frustrations out on me & that he can date my ‘friend’. the keep saying they will hav a good future together and will make them proud if they get married one day. opened a convo, i spoke to him like i normally do and we got on so well but he did notttttt kno it was me! – i do like your friends advice to continue dating others. however, i have been in situations where my casual sex partner wanted the relationship to become serious, and i did not. best relationship i've ever had, and i can't imagine better. brought it up and he told me that he thinks there is someone else better out there for his “lifestyle. in the cases where his profile is still up, i would expect that another month after bringing up your concerns is all it should take for him to decide (and it really should be much faster than this). i don’t have any lack of self esteem but i don’t call myself a gift horse! i texted him that i missed him, i havent mentioned anything to him about deleting his profile, i told him i deleted mine and he said he cant delete his from his phone. one thing bothers me though, his profile in the dating site is still active – though he told me before that he rarely checks or chat with women in it. i only work 5-6 hour days, and then i was back to staying at my place but we were still constantly seeing each other. i think it’s reasonable for you to be concerned based on what you’ve found and i think it’s reasonable for you to let him know that. don’t beat him up and don’t jump to ultimatums.’s a situation i’d appreciate your perspective:Have been doing the match thing for a few months. strange thing is, while i deleted my profile from the site on which we’d met, he hadn’t and i assumed he’d just cease using it or hide his profile and not renew his subscription but, turns out he has a match membership discovered by my suspicious sister whose brought it to my attention. i am not a lonely or desperate woman and like to think i have a great life and great friends. do you think he will change, or should i just move on and find someone else?. even if after i take mine down, because it is just a profile… and i have decided… (just now) after reading all these comments that unless he cheats and i can prove it (and i will be gone)… nothing else matters…. when he says he’ll take it down when the time is “right”…well, if you’re dating someone and you keep telling her you’re not going to date anyone else then the right time is now! i can be rather forthright in these matters – the usual sympton of having been hurt terribly in the past and made a fool of etc. your ways and he will change his response to you. he asked me to cancel the recurring payments in paypal, which i did for him (english is his second language and he’s not terribly computer savvy). met my so at a party and we exchanged numbers and hooked up that night..what am i going to be with you, sleep with you, & be wondering whats going on; on the side with the dating site….
Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 4 years
i met my boyfriend on an online dating website years ago. after a while i replied & said that my friend had told me she’s seeing him. for example, at the end of a nice evening together (especially if the two of you are commenting on how much you enjoy spending time together) you could bring up your concerns on not knowing where you stand in the relationship. he is always maxxed out both energetically and with his time. and how on earth do you even start that kind of convo without sending guy running for the hills? we went on some 'dates' after that and the rest is history. but i never made it past 2 months with anyone because each and every time the guy would continue with an active profile i would feel disrespected, lose trust and belief in the guy’s intentions and force a swift ending one way or another. i think you getting your profile down and then asking him where he sees things going is the best thing to do. things had been going wonderfully, we spent a lot of time together, almost every other day, and texting/phone conversations every day. i need a break from online dating so i’ve hidden my profile. i messaged him on my friends proflie and he answered very nicely that i was pretty and he was still looking for a relationship. i went back with him to his apartment, and things went well. don’t attack him about it – show genuine curiosity and i hope he’ll realize that even if he thinks it’s not a big deal that his profile should come down/be hidden. he had left it logged in and i noticed from the history he had checked some of the women out but he didn’t have a premium account. men pull away after sex (and what you can do about it! we had the exclusive talk, and we both agreed to not see anyone else – but we aren’t exactly “official” yet because of the uncertainty of his job (he’s at risk of being sent overseas for a minimum of 2 years). so i checked online later monday and low and behold he created a new profile recently online and he was on that day. so we met and he told me he was glad i had pushed him out. if he’s not going to commit, this is a risk for you and i’d see talking to other men as a valid approach since you can’t know what he’s going to do down the line. i finally told him he need to set up a specific date with me where we could go out and talk about this stuff together and privately. before christmas he said he was really stressed about money and the contact was no longer daily. he began texting numerous other women, and even had a one night stand with a younger woman while he was out of town. i’m no saint though i go on match too but i’m different and it bothers me he uses it that much. he starting to show signs that he is interested in me and i am meeting his friends already and its been 2 weeks of dating. sum it all up: i would expect that within the first month of actively dating each other that you should have an idea of where you stand and i would expect his profile to be down. occasionally joke on how we get emails in our personal email accounts saying people are still trying to contact us and we should probably take them down because we feel bad that people are trying to contact us especially when you open an email in your personal account because it shows that you have read the email to the sender even if you haven’t logged on. you don’t want his profile up and that’s what i think you should have said..this behavior is interpreted as "nagging" and it pushes him away. on monday he asked if he could see me on tuesday and i told him i wouldn’t mind but i wasn’t getting intimate since i didn’t like the idea of him flirting and dating other women. he gave me a key to his place also and told me to stop by whenever. am not brad (obviously) but if you read my post, which is right before yours, you can see i was almost in the same situation. in the begining i didnt have a problem with him still being active on the site cus it was early days, i was still on there too. if that is the case, how long to you tolerate such lack of respect for you, for the investment you are making of your heart and your life? notice shes still going on this same dating website we met on ( i had taken mine off since we met) but this worries me so much that i asked if she still went onto the site and she said she did. i met him online, soon after romeo proclaimed adoration and love for me he “deactivated” his account as he said he is % sure i was the one his been looking for. mean we are just getting to know each other, and it’s still very new, but since i had asked him if he is still on dating sites or talking to other women, i feel like he wasn’t sincere by telling me he wasn’t. we have been together over four years now and living together for about two years. he went bananas and said he was crazy about me. so, i put my profile back up today and i am not going to tell him. so i began “snooping” and found that even though after 6 months he was still using the dating site that we met on, but he is doing it from his phone so that i can’t check. feel like there’s a lot i left out, yet it’s hard typing on my tablet… and trying to sum up feelings and experiences to a stranger. i met my boyfriend (i think) on plenty of fish in july and we’ve been hanging out, having fun since. i’m so confused, but over thisyear our conversations and time spent together hs allowed my heart to grow. we text when we aren’t hanging out or he calls on lunch, and he is always talking about our future with my daughter. i am in my late 40s and was seeing and sleeping with a man in his late 50s who i learned was very active on the dating site we met on. so my question is should i be concern about his profile is still up and he’s still checking it, since i never mention or ask him to take it down. i asked him about going to the movie again and never heard anything back. i told him i was hesitant to live together as that felt very committed and serious, and i didn’t actually know for sure what his intentions were with me. almost everyone who has success with online dating will have some time where they have a subscription but aren’t using it…assuming they meet someone. in my mind the matter is so simply about respect and i find it difficult to understand how to tolerate the ‘continues to actively online date’ thing…. would you be hurt if she did this to you and slyly hooked up with another guy? i asked why he was online recently, and he said it had to be a mistake, that he must have accidentally pushed a button on his phone that logged him on without him even realizing it. him an email saying,“looking over my letters to you i realize i was being a little needy and demanding. if the two of you have worked out some understanding on a difference between exclusive and girlfriend/boyfriend, isn’t he still headed towards breaking that agreement? my question is, what do you do if you’re dating a narcissist? when we first met he was so into me calling me all day and making his way to see me whenever he had free time. if you’ve been on one or two dates and your guy still has his profile up, you have nothing to worry about. i reacted instantly – saying the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results (i was talking of myself) and of course a few other choice words……. if she says she’s not comfortable with that because of her past experience, i’d try to be understanding. the same is happeningto me again so maybe next time i will try meeting someone who doesn’t have a computer as i am rapidly losing faith in meeting someone who is honest and loyal and can commit to one person. i also took more time to look at his profile than i originally did the last time, and i noticed that at some point he uploaded a recent picture that he actually just posted to facebook back in april. eventually we started to realize that we enjoyed each others company for more than just hooking up, and have now been dating for almost three years. he said he was extremely hurt as well and he still cares for me a lot, but wants to take it slow. he wanted to see me whenever he wanted to never when it was convientient for me i was expected to change my plans but when he said i didnt have to as he wouldn't for me i didnt change them and he pouted and sulked saying he now had to jump to my command he wanted someone he could boss about and treat like crap and when he found he couldnt do that he went quiet using lots of excuses he was tired he was working he was preparing for work he was seeing his daughter he was seeing his friend ladies if a guy doesnt call or text or email or anything for weeks at a time hes just not that into you move on the minute you move on he will want to know again which shows he is not the one for you. i couldn’t but told him to drop by the club where i was going with my friends. i finally pushed him and he admitted he and she had a sexual relationship a long time ago and that he had lied but he felt nothing for her then or now. we've been together a little over two years and counting. the emails he wrote to her were very flattering and he said beautiful things to her just like he did when he first met me and how he wanted to meet her and possiibly have a relationship with her. situation is a little bit different, so i don’t know if it fits this category…i’ve been doing the online thing for just about 3 months now, and have met some nice and not so nice men. so i went into my whatsapp (that’s how we communicate) and checked when my messages to him were actually read (i normally don’t pay attention to this), and it came out that he seemed to have been online at times when he told me that he didn’t have wifi on his phone. things were going great and he asked me to meet him on thursday. he had asked me to meet his mom a few months ago, but we had to cancel and it has yet to happen. our emails were immediately riveting and he even told me it seemed like we knew each other for ages. you really do have to believe that when he says he is busy he is busy. anyways, we still met up and spoke very very regularly over the next 6 months. guess my queston is why does it seem like we are playing house with no real commitment? i removed my profile at the end of the first week or so explaining to him that it was my personal preference/instinct and that it placed no pressure or expectation on him. i am not asking the guy to committ to me and plan weddings and babies. both my friends are married several years and have good marriages. – i think it’s likely that he’ll find another excuse, but you can explain to him how to hide his profile: log into match then click profile then settings and then set the profile to hidden. he lied when he told me he hadn’t been with anyone else in a while, which turned out to be about 7 days… and he told his fwb girl that he hadn’t been with me in a really long time – which actually was like 3 days. we chat/txt evey day without fail, he has been to my house few times now but i’ve never been to his. i just started working full time and could not show enough income on paper to get another apartment that fast. the online dating profile is tellng me that he is still keeping his options open just incase. next day - work got even worse with further changes and he said he was going to find a new place to work and would actively pursue a new job. brad, i really enjoyed the post and seems that many of us experience the same issue. i was so upset i put my profile back up without telling him, but i haven’t been active in looking to date anyone else. if he has already said he "isn't really looking for a relationship," before he gets into work and becomes scarce. if you can share your body through sexual contact (which is clearly intimate contact), then you should be comfortable enough to have the talk about expectations. you two have ongoing sex in any form , have respect for yourself as well as her and anyone else you are whispering to in bed – and either become exclusive if its going well or let her find a man who knows her worth and would like to share life with her. we have been seeing each other, twice a week for 7 weeks now. in about another month or so, he will know for sure if he will stay here or be sent away, and we have agreed to talk about being officially exclusive at that time. sex relationships have turned into serious, committed,Long-term partnerships (and even marriages). in the beginning he would visit me every weekend and call me every day. i just asked if i had anything to be worried about and he said no. i’ve developed some very strong feelings for him and i feel that i am making the right move in continuing to see him. met an amazing guy about 2 months ago and we decided to only see each other. you enjoy each others’ company, enjoy the same things and over the next month or so you start to date more seriously.. i dont want to be pushy and annoy by bringing it up again. you’ve decided to get a clearer idea of where your relationship stands, i recommend trying to start conversations as naturally as possible over a 2 to 4 week period. that was the last communication we had, and i am kind of glad that i didn’t say anything about the badoo profile, but i am now feeling uncertain of what really is going on, and if i should leave it for now or until he comes back in october? first for six months, then casual sex for six months, then open relationship for three years, then serious open relationship for the last two years. ever since then i can’t think about anything else and i still feel sick to the very core, i just want to know why he would do this! i felt sick and angry but said nothing… i calmed down and spoke to a friend next day and she was like, u need to say something. we've been together for three and a half years and are still going strong. that evening me and my friend were going to move to another location and i texted him to let him know. my friend asked if i check to see if he had gotten on his profile, so i did, and that sunday night he had been on., forgot to mention, i go over to his place a lot and everytime i leave, he begs me to stay and says he hates that i have to leave. he told me he would try to meet me somewhere if he could get some stuff done for work and some family things, he told me to txt him in an hour or so and see where he was at with being finished. and then his talking about getting together after the day before i think we’re done? i understand his availability issues because of his work as a nurse, but i’m feeling this sadness and doubt inside me because it has already been almost a week since he last sent me a message. i would be as kind as possible if you decide to have this talk with her: you’re not trying to punish/reprimand her, just letting her know where you stand. the next morning i asked why he always tried to meet me during weekdays and he said it was just a coincidence cos his weekends would get so busy. i guess the details of everything doesn’t really matter, i don’t trust him to be faithful to me long term, and i don’t trust him to be truthful with me. he told me he was the luckiest guy in the world to have a great catch like me’. we talked a lot about what we want in life, our values and dreams, and they match almost 100%. but i must say his profiles up still really bother me, especially since we have been intimate. he said it all has actually caused him to love me even more and strengthen his commitment to me, which he acknowledges might sound strange, but that is the affect it had for him. currently we still keep some contact and meet once a week.' we've been together about five years now, and have two children. he was sent to them as a mutual match and it showed that he was online that day within one hour after he had with me in bed the night prior.
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Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 4 months
what’s your advice when you’re dating a selfish man? i texted and welcomed him back and told him to enjoy. just want to take the time to say thank you very much for your insight and guidance. two days ago, someone brought his pof account to my attention, knowing that we were “together”, so i got online and checked it out. ive been very patient about the situation because hes so good to me and my daughter he cooks for us every single day, and hes told me that he saw me as wife material and introduced me to a lot of ppl in his family. to turn things around he tells me he likes me very much and misses me when he’s gone. a month later, i sold all my belongings in boston and flew over to australia to be with him., he is still active on the sight and logs in. my flight is starting to come out again, he is barely there. i told him at the end, “i’ll get home and delete my profile :p” he goes, “so will i ren :)” so that night when he got home, we texted for about an hour and he told me what a great time he had and that he can’t wait til i’m in the same college as him so we can always be together. month 4, i told him i was really enjoying getting to know him, and that my feelings for him were growing in a way i had not expected, and realized that i had reached a point where i would like to include him more into my life and allow him to meet my children (they are teenagers now). he replied jokingly asking if i stalk him haha and that he didn’t know why because he turned off his roaming of data to not have a cost explosion. i just immensely like him, and i haven’t felt this way about anyone. i was quick to let you know how much i loved my wife but every time i told you this i also punched her in the face. i realize she’s already reached that point where it would be devastating for her to lose him but allowing it to continue only to have things end over this a few years from now isn’t going to improve things for her. i know you make a case for not doing this in your comment but i worry that there is some risk in expecting a man to recognize:The moment when it is obvious you are both moving towards proper committment (and not even by the time’ you have committed to exclusivity verbally). he texted me as soon as he got home and i thought things will progress. How do you tell if he is interested in dating you exclusively? – i’m guessing here but if i were going to tell a woman i was dating that i had taken down my profile, it would normally be because i would be hinting to her that i want to date each other exclusively. thanks for the advice and look forward to seeing what happens next! i would like to have faith that it would develop but i think i have hurt him over the years with my reactions and off and on meanness of not healing properly before, that i don't know if he will ever come back to liking me the way he did to be in a relationship.! week four, another i love you, and a few more fun filled evenings. a few days afterwards i got a text telling me that he got crazy news and that he couldn’t tell me now but would call me after work. i have only been dating him 3 weeks, but i don’t want to be with a guy who just wants to string me along so i will wait maximum 6 weeks for him to mention something. i messaged him again later to say i had just finished working and . along really well communicate during the week and he comes over even when he is exhausted just to see me wants to meet kids and his kids we have had 6 dates and wants to go out from the beginning not to b too serious go slow and asked me two weeks ago to settle down didn’t really answer him but told him i like him. before all this i knew we have a whole lot in common and there was a lot of chemistry and sexual tension plus i really like him. would you be amazed by the love i have for my wife? he takes out so much time from his busy schedule to skype with me, which he initiates a lot, and he drove to see me and paid and was a huge gentleman. then he tells me since he had been in relationships up until now, he’s just not ready for a full on relationship’ and that he likes checking when he’s bored. i still think that’s a fine thing to do but more recently i’ve found myself encouraging women to be a bit more pro-active or aggressive (whereas changing your photo is rather passive-aggressive). actually began seeing each other casually while i was 'seriously' (more so for him than me) dating someone else. after the first date their was no question weather or not if i wanted to see him again, hope to be his gf and etc. have both been under a lot of pressure and stress this past year and i haven’t had the guts to bring it up. we actually had a very serious conversation about the future last weekend, and ours seems bright. we’ve even been to a festival and just went away for the weekend together. this article has been very helpful but i want something a little bit more specific. the reader above waited six weeks and i think that is very patient. now i totally understand and i want to thank you for your patience. so i can see how the boys would struggle to manage that and think that continuing conversations online harmless… it is an enormous confidence booster, flattering to receive attention and the thrill of first dates really good fun. he kept me in the loop of events for the following days until he finally left for turkey, and we spoke before he actually got on the plane. was very surprised when the relationship changed because i started to become distant and gave up, even sleeping with another guy i was interested in. this would put our “relationship” on hold and already up to a tough test. he wanted to take things slowly and was not ready to commit to a relationship though he liked me a lot and did not want to stop what we have. i have read mars and venus on a date and getting to i do, which both talk about being the feminine energy in a relationship. i checked to see where he was at on the date of that party, and he was with me the whole time – so he didn’t go. we spend a good deal of our free time together, he’s met my friends and family (he has no one here, but his family knows about me), and we have an amazing time whenever we are together. he lives about 120 miles away and is busy finishing up his residency. i texted him a "hello" a few weeks after his call and he never even responded. don’t be too quick or demanding in your desire to define your relationship…be willing to give it time and allow it to grow naturally. i still think its about respect… and not so much about committment. in the morning things were as usual great – he asked for my advice about some property & financial matters & we talked about everything under the sun. i have checked simply out of curiosity and really to keep myself from getting to attached at this point. i know he checked his email and eventually he did look at the profile, but he did not take the bait and respond back. he also tells me that he hasn’t told any women that he loved them since his ex wife – and they have been divorced 11+ years at this point. i saw him that night and he seemed really down. he said he was checking for my profile and was curious. maybe i just answered my own question and it’s just hard to let go of something that seems to great. a few comments and this story fit my story exactly. take his absence personally and you’re feelings get hurt. ive taken family vacations with him and his father so im thinking things are just fine. i actually made a list after my last boyfriend, at the suggestion of my counselor, listing what i want in a man. he was recently single as well and we'd always had sexual tension, and he was the perfect booty call for all the aforementioned reasons. he’s spoken a lot about his parents and himself and his friends and his work. we haven’t gone on a real date yet because he lives in a different country than mine. as long as you're signed up for email updates you'll get tons of free advice to rebuild your life and love! i told him i appreciate his honesty and that if he still wanted to ‘date’ (not spend nights, yada yada) while we both date others, to keep our connection going, i was ok with that. it takes is one act of unprotected or oral sex and a habitual liar with high risk behavior to expose you to a lifetime of emotional and physical problems. he totally denied that he was on the site and could not see how the picture got on it.'s upset that you're no longer happy and upset that he cannot do anything about it! i gave my boyfriend plenty of space, and did not pressure him any. you are old and wise enough to read the tos and have basic respect. is now day 3 i havent heard from him at all today. i can’t say which one it is but i do think if he’s keeping his options open you’ll really want to do the same thing (and not just saying you are to convince him to stop)., wow i really wish i would have known this advice 3-4 years ago. i am not sure if i can handle knowing that he is with me and others.. i brought up the subject and he insisted it was nothing that he had an app on his phone and would click on it when bored but that he would remove the app. i gave him lots of space, but he would still text me every day, and i'd reply something short but encouraging – so a couple times a day we’d have small touching base. i’ve met his parents and extended family and he has met my parents. she says he’s on it regularly and this evening while he’s texting me on the phone, she calls and says, “he’s online at match right now”. i've never seen such a switch - even my guy friends are baffled. i don’t think you should feel stuck though – obviously this is a relationship you should work on getting away from (but i understand your concern given his response). he had not dated anyone else, and i believe him.. i also haven’t heard from him all day yesterday, but i didn’t think anything of it until i found out about the badoo thing.. ladies, be smart about this, like a previous poster said, respect yourselves, love yourselves, and have enough confidence to kick his azz to the curb if you have to… one day he will realize what he had and how he messed it up, may not be tomorrow but one day he will! he is still getting messages from other women on there and i told him that she accidentally hit it (i didn’t even act mad) and he turned it around like it was me and said i was probably snooping (this time i really wasn’t! i don’t like to come across as the vulnerable one & dating commitment phobes in the past has made me tougher so i don’t want to bring up a conversation of where are things going or mention his profile still being up. 3 months in is when i saw he was still logging in……it upset me…. they like to look and the crave for attention from the opposite sex.. after fighting about it for weeks he’s now saying he’s going to delete it but when where together to do it… because as soon as i saw he had his, damn right i put mine back up and he said i did it out of “revenge” …. i bring it up, he says ok let’s talk about, and bam. i was able to see his messages and as of today it shows that he had logged in and there were messages from women in which he had responded to just a couple of hours earlier before i came home. saw each other every weekend and we would stay the night at each others house…i trusted this guy, he made me feel loved by his actions. i told him i didn’t understand this plan since we had not talked yet. what he did is not right and you did not deserve to be hurt like that. that’s why i am confused of what to think and do now……. i know you care for him and i know that it hurts, i’m just afraid that he’s establishing a pattern where he’s showing that he’s going to continue to hurt you throughout your relationship. maybe wait a week or so and see if the profile comes down on its own. so, after two months and three weekend-long visits/dates, but knowing that he is slow to commit, when is a reasonable time to have “the talk”? the 2nd time i had a little too many and it got a little too late and we ended up going back to his place and well you can guess what happened. after that i did what any respectable women would do and i deactivated by online profile.©2016 john gray's mars venus, llc all rights reservedshopping cart by brand retailers. i also have a feeling that he won’t text me tonight. the only interaction i have had with match is when i open to delete the wink/emails sent to my personal yahoo account. you been dating exclusively for 3 months or have you not had a talk on being exclusive? have to add that he struck me to be honest and good from the very beginning, and he never gave me reason to not trust him. even if a woman had been cheated on, the message would still be “i’d like to commit to dating you”. with a few men but didn’t have the desire to take it further than friendly chat……. being crazy about her may not be enough if you have to check your match winks and mails. about a week ago, i noticed that he had the pof app installed on his phone, and he just got a new phone a few days before that – so i calmly asked him about it. occasionally joke on how we get emails in our personal email accounts saying people are still trying to contact us and we should probably take them down because we feel bad that people are trying to contact us especially when you open an email in your personal account because it shows that you have read the email to the sender even if you haven’t logged on. i have not messaged him as i don't want to chase him, if he wants me he'd come after me stress or not.! this after he tells me he’s the luckiest man to have a great catch like me. you decided to meet and on your first date things go great. during the date, he continued to say the same things that he’s been saying to me and he couldn’t keep his hands off me. i asked him if we are exclusive and he said yes. last weekend we were supposed to go out but i got tied up and i told him and he was pretty bummed.’ve decided to try online dating and found yourself talking to a man that seems promising. i shouldn’t have made such a big deal of it, but i was really hurt. it’s especially bothersome if his actions suggest exclusivity even if he hasn’t declared so in words…and yet it is still acceptable in my mind for him to keep his profile up, even in this case. yep, my take is that if i agree to be just friends, then friends i will forever more be.
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Found out girlfriend of 5 months has herpes- HSV2. Thread
it’s march 2015, and he brings up the topic of moving in together. none of this one foot in the bed and the other on the floor while exploring options. his facebook page and his relationship status says involved with another girl. and he replied with a nice good morning text as usual, apologizing for not texting yesterday but he didn’t go to the wifi place but went to the base and finished settling in and going to bed early. if he’s never going to commit, wouldn’t you rather know now as opposed to 6 months from now? will try to keep this to the point and as brief as possible which may prove to be difficult since i’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now. that being said, are there any creative ways where you could spend more time together even though you don’t have cars? now 5 weeks later i will be meeting his kids and going to a family gathering soon but he is still online. a text with a friend he hadn’t spoken to in a while, the buddy asked him if he had a girlfriend, and he responded ‘sort of. we talked for hours and both expressed how comfortable we felt talking to each other about any topic that you can think of. he said things to me like “you have a lot of stress in your life, and it’s stressing me out etc. 4 units so busy but he bought it to my attention that he saw me online previous day. you’re sharing your feelings with him as an act of intimacy and through a desire to connect, he thinks you are blaming him for not being a good enough boyfriend. almost feel as if i am growing walls around my heart so i don’t come out……don’t people build walls to not let anyone in? there are going to be ups and down, good and bad – you just have to be willing to put forth the work.“i went to the grocery store today and ran into my high school math teacher…small world. there was one night about 3 weeks ago now where i did flip out on him (somewhat) about not responding to my texts at all (heard nothing from him, two different days. i get that i hurt him, and we obviously had some sort of miscommunication about what i ment by needing some time to think. week two came and i found that while i was waiting for him to respond to a text i sent (45mins) he was on the dating website from his phone. on the other hand, if my casual sex partners steer clear in my time of need, it can remain as a casual sexual relationship.) last night i went on (my profile is hidden) and his profile is active for everyone to see. about a month into dating, i knew i really liked him and wanted to see where it was going to go. is this a time to endure the storm, persist and keep working on myself to heal and be kind to him to prove i am here and not going to run away when things get tough. i didn't press - he'd already shared that his dad has addiction issues similar to a friend of mine, and that his mom is at her wit's end and they may be divorcing. it sounds like he’s assuming you’d continue to date other people because you spent the money even if you found someone you wanted to date exclusively and that makes no sense to me. said ok, that i would hang in there, but i asked him to please be straight up with me the second he doesn’t feel like this will go anywhere and he promised he would. it’s early may, and we’re spending mothers day with his parents. i began dating, i realized what fun i was having with it, even if a date wasn’t great, i just loved getting out there and meeting new people and discovering things about myself and relationships that i hadn’t before. he even came inside to meet my parents (he was so nervous) but unfortunately, they went to bed before we got there. after i posted my previous concerns, my man and i went out to dinner and after that i asked him how he feel about us being exclusive and he hugged me and was silent for a minute then he said yes. i left an abusive relationship of 22 years just over 2 years ago and have not recovered from the financial 'fall-out' yet. then he gets an email from an interested woman and he says, “oh wow, i need to update my profile”. he is sending me all these confusing messages and i am afraid to bring it up again since we already had the talk. in general, he was never pushy or anything, but the opposite, and i got the impression of him as being a nice and honest guy. he said that he finds me very pretty and hot. i’ve been dating this guy for 5 months now, we spend every weekend together. having sex with my best friend is probably the best thing on this planet. this whole situation sounds to me like him trying to have his cake and eat it too. how many girls he’d been with sexually and not: not many, and if he was dating anyone else: no, and if he was what i like to call a serial dater, dating many at once. i love him but he wont commit, using this family thing as an excuse i guess, but then he still is online tlking to random women whilst keeping me in and out of his life? he acts very much like a boyfriend but wait a minute he refuses to acknowledge the gf/ bf thing. in an attempt to be "just friends" we began texting each other a bit, and because he lives with a close friend of mine we saw each other a couple of times.! snatched my phone out of my hand said he would ” f me up” if i went on a date with another man even though we’re broken up! shellbell – i’m emailing you a response on this (sorry for the delay if you wander back! am i supposed to always be patient and understanding even though i'm feeling neglected? all that wasted time waiting for him to make the right choice only to have him start dating someone else. i don’t know what to do, put my profile back up, question him again or what. had not been on my profile since nov when we had the talk, and neither had he, but we didn’t discuss hiding or removing our profiles. i admitted that i felt i was getting confusing signals from him and sometimes i thought he liked me and sometimes he didn't. i confronted him about it, we broke up, and then he came crawling back to me 2 weeks later and deleted his okcupid profile. i guess my question is, if it’s almost been a year and his feelings haven’t changed since we first started seeing each other and he’s still going on dating websites, should i even try to thinkta he would someday want a relationship? he helped with my car, helped paint the shutters of my fathers house, my father is getting old now and it meant so much to me, he even helped with other things around the house, he said he “liked to take care of me. i'm not opposed to doing what you suggest, however i don't think that doing so is going to fulfill my own personal needs and goals. we just did our first vacation together, and he brought up that how can i not trust him after we just did all that, and we’re so close bla bla bla, we’ve come so far….. when i think back i am surprised to find that each and every time it was i who decided when he should have an opinion about me, i decided when he should take down his profile and actually i decided everything about timing etc based on my instinct and my feelings. we were very intense the first month seeing each other all the time and every weekend. i asked him to back off and please take it slower. both have 3 children, although his dont live with him and are a bit older than mine.’m gonna see how it goes over the next month, if he’s still going on then he doesn’t care about my feelings and i’d prefer to be someone’s one and only, not their until something better comes along! six months later and we now live together, he was new to the city i live in and hes been having trouble finding a job. he told my fake profile in his last email 2 days back that there was no spark between us & that’s why he kept it casual. not by his charm or anything, but by the effort he puts into being with me and everything. if you guys are planning vacations and are seeing each other soo frequently, he should have more respect for you and not have any active accounts. he says hes not dating/sleeping with anyone else but why is he still online? send countless texts and emails demanding him to answer for his neglectful behavior. have read that many complaints from match is the status option is flawed and can be triggered from simply receiving and deleting a email from match in your personal account. he goes online every day brad yesterday he was online in the morning and in the evening.’d suggest talking with him and encouraging him to let you know when he’s feeling down or tempted to create a profile…but you need to be open and understanding if he’s going to be that honest with you (so no attacking if he admits he’s feeling that way). it's going on six years, and we are getting married this year. across the country, today is the first day i haven’t heard from him at all, even though i’ve made several attempts. i feel like i am holding onto something that will never be anymore but i have a tendency to flight when i feel i am about to get hurt. i guess you could mention to him that your friend told you that she saw his account was still up and you could let him know that you’d feel much better if he hid it. i confronted him about and he said he was deleting it and,and i better start acting right. he wants to spend all of his free time with me and i feel that due to the fact that hes new to the city that’s mainly because he doesn’t know a lot of ppl. you are the one who needs to make the choice: do i work with what i got, honor his differences, give him space and ask for what i want? my problem is when i date i can only focus on 1 guy and 1 guy only. may (2014) he got an out of the blue text from his ex (fwb girl), saying he should come to a party she is having in june.!Are you new to online dating or looking to improve your success using it? so i told him that the dinners, massages, sex and intimacy were over and asked him to be respectful. he used to text me all the time and now he never texts me unless i text him first. take it hard when he delays, and as you say 'dun dun dun', let him know that i am taking it hard. my last boyfriend was not trustworthy so i've had a hard time letting myself trust this one and even letting myself really like him. – it sounds to me like you were exclusive at some point (at least in his mind) and then later, without you knowing exactly why, you stopped being exclusive (again, at least in his mind). after reading many of these stories i have somewhat of an undertstanding that this is not uncommon. he changed the city to the town he used to live in, shrunk his height by 2 inches, and hasn’t put up a picture. he feels like he has a ‘clean slate’ now, and can see that he absolutely wants to be committed to me, he said quote “i’m all in!. he told his fwb girl ‘love you’ in a text, and that was a little over a month after we first met. its long distance so we met for the first 2 weeks after talking and the date went perfectly, she even bought me dinner! i was completely honest with him that i had looked him up, and he told me that he ex-wife took his old computer after they split up and that’s the computer he had used to sign up. it’s just that the sent messages show when that user has been online). even after all this thinking and reading: i still don’t understand entirely. he knows that i will soon be going to live where he lives soon because that is my plan (even before i met him) – which is four months from now. i deactivated my pof online dating acount 2 weeks ago as soon as we discussed that we were dating. he did and had no problem giving me his number! i have a date today & i did mention to him on friday night that i had a date then. after 2 months he asked me to be his girlfriend – actually an old college friend of his we met on the street asked if i was his gf and then a few mins later i told him that i did not want to continue to see him unofficially so he asked me to be his girlfriend and said he’d tried to ask many times but was too shy. jenn – i actually touch on this issue a bit in my article on when a guy disappears after a few dates. – that’s its okay to continue chatting and even dating online while dating and building a relationship with one of us. after we exchanged numbers we held conversations over the phone and and texted each quite often . deleted my profile about 2 weeks after we had started being boyfriend and girlfriend. i emailed/texted him multiple times a day asking what had happened and when could we talk? i had a dinner date that evening & due to some sudden dramas it didn’t go ahead – i came home & realised i couldn’t find my mobile. on the other hand i don’t want to continue to put a lot of time and effort into this relationship if she’s looking for something else as i don’t want to be the fallback guy either…. my landlord gave me (not kidding)a two week notice to move out. expected both our profiles would remain active until we were certain we were right for each other and moved forward in the relationship. i would rather have someone that challenges me and pushed me to be a better person every day, and i intend to do the same. i think if you start to have those conversations it might lead more naturally into an “exclusive” conversation. we are at the point when we say i love you every day and we are often talking about marriage. i have toned the disappointment texts down and have held back (probably still not enough) and tried to explain that i appreciate him working hard, and that he is tired and busy, but that also i would like to connect with him because it makes me feel good when we do, and i start to feel bummed when it has been soooo long since we have talked, because i really look forward to them. things were going extremely well and i have never been happier. well after we had sex and all he is still interested cause we went out again and i told him i had my period and he didn’t care. i said, "no" and changed the subject to lighter things. he invited me to stay at his place and we again had a great time, very easygoing, no tension or uncomfortable feeling at all. completely deleted my profile dont know if i should make a new one or what. he’s told me his biggest fear is missing the boat’ as in not getting married and having kids at a decent age. just met someone this past weekend and we “hooked up” for a few days and it was nice…and i find it weird that he still emails me on the site seeing that we have had such a hot weekend… i have stated that i find it weird to communicate since he and i have each others phone number and i also stated that i date one person at a time and that if he chooses to continue looking that is on him…. i give a suggestion i come there, he says he just needs to chill out and not 'entertain'. i am really confused cos y’day he was online 3 times i haven’t even gone into my account. etc, that he doesn't want to be my boyfriend currently. and lets just say that because i went out for a girls night instead of hangin with him, that he responded to this other woman. he actually emailed my fake profile on friday & then on sunday.
His Dating Profile is Still Active – Is He Interested or Not? - Online
i do hope to hear back from you about my situation, you seem to have solid and sincere advice. so if he doesn’t take it down within the next week, and i approach him about it again, wouldn’t it come off as pushing? we have gone on trips, and had wonderful dates, he told me i’m just the girl he’s dating. i told him no way cause i have a life to which he said how about saturday day time? he had a couple of messages received – one of which was from my fake profile. he brought up my fake profile but i told him i did ‘t want to talk a put it cos i am still hurting. my biggest worry is my daughter, she is very attached to him and tells him that he is her best friend and she loves him, and he tells her the same. about 2 weeks after we met, i cancelled my match account, and closed out my pof profile. article, and i found it because i am in a similar situation and really need your. i, the obsessor that i am when i genuinely have feelings for someone, made a fake profile and emailed him “hi! begin to open up more about how you feel but with no expectations or demands (at least not in the beginning). accidentally discovered that my bf had recently logged into his online dating profile. towards the beginning, we decided to go withthe flow and see where this relationship would go. new guy - 3 months in and long distance - totally disappears., if you sent him a short email saying you were going to be in his area soon and you’d love to grab a coffee with him, i think that could work. said he likes me, likes spending time with me and we have lots of fun. went to a spa, it was beautiful and we ended up staying the night together……., as with other situations discussed here, i think it’s totally reasonable to expect real commitment at a certain point and it sounds like you’ve reached that based on what you describe. however there is one problem: his dating profile is still active. i once again bring it up because i’m hurt and he proceeds to say he honestly thought it was nothing and had deleted the app and proceeded to even cancel his subscription in front of me. then today i searched again and it said active in 3 days. it's unfortunate i have fallen for a guy with no money either. and i flip out completely, assume relationship is over right there on skype, because he doesn't want to see me. anyhow she clearly knew about me, and was very threatened by me.’t want to spend my life trying to figure out who you are'. he was dating and sleeping w/ tons of women – that doesn’t really concern me too much, as i can’t say i wasn’t doing a little of the same, and we had not declared exclusivity at that point. on the monday i didn't hear from him, so as a carry on from our convo i sent a message saying that another confusing signal was being in a relationship but not getting a 'good morning' from my man. i got really sad about he still having it up and went into my zone for the rest of the night. he said no, and when i asked if he is talking to other women too, he also denied and said i don’t need to worry because we are good, we are having a great time and that he is being honest. 6months we decided to meet up again finally and it was just incredible!. i’ll summarize the positive and negative of what i found:He had not been texting or emailing other women since over a year ago (at least from what i could tell). he was very challenging to me and i liked that at the time (although he chased after me, he's just a difficult person). dating profile is still active – is he interested or not? neither of us had an official discussion about bf/gf labels yet, but i wasn’t in a hurry for all that stuff, as everything truly felt great and was going so well. you both have a profile on match and have been intimate on more than one occasion, one or both of you should step up to the plate and discuss the options. in my heart i feel that when a person man/woman is in a serious relationship on line dating sites should be out. we knew who we were as people, so the sex just made things even more intimate and, most importantly, more honest. doesn’t sound like a great catch to me to be honest and i imagine there’s more going on than he wants you to know. also that he got to go and wished me a great day and that we would talk soon. i kept refreshing the search everyday i don’t know why and then last friday morning i was shocked when i saw that not only had he been online but he had uploaded his picture. me, if a month goes by after you’ve expressed your concerns and he is still refusing to remove his profile then setting ultimatums seems more reasonable. of the last couple of weeks ive had this nagging suspicious feeling and i couldn’t put my finger on it. i called him 3 times when i was off work and then it started going straight to voicemail… not sure if he turned the phone off or what…. i want to be with someone who is at least sure enough to put all the other girls in the world aside for a moment and give the relationship the attention and respect it deserves – for however long ‘it’ lasts – for whatever ‘it’ is. the next day a friend of mine told me that the same guy i was eyeing was interested in me and wanted my number . basically i met this guy on a marriage website and we got to know each other of the basic stuff. check out our video on sex positions for small penises:Images: andrew zaeh/bustle; giphy (22). at this point, assuming you’re right, i’m not sure what other options you have. before i proceed let me give you a bit of a background i had broken up with my ex 2 days before xmas since he had been mia for 2 months which drove me insane. he did, when we spoke i said i was upset, i just seen his profile and how it changed and we were literlally with each other hours ago. i asked him on sunday and he said he was in there cleaning up his inbox before deleting. he says he really likes me and is into me and still getting to know me. i let him pursue me and after two and a half months of being with and seeing eachother every single day and night we decided to be together in a relationship. maybe once you know where he stands, it will make it easier for you to make a decision? seemed we were perfect together with him professing his love and talking of marriage. he wasn't ready for a serious relationship when we met and was very up front about that, but i knew pretty quickly that i wanted more from him than just casual sex. i said i had made an account and saw him on there. so i took down my profile after we chat and plans to talk to him about our relationship. i immediately drove over to his house, and asked him (not in an angry or confrontational way) if we wanted to date other people. how he loves what we have but that he doesn’t think he can give me what im looking for at the time. 5 days ago he stopped talking to me (something which he was doing every day) and so after 2 days i sent him a nice laid back message about an in joke we have and he responded nicely but thats been it for another 3 days. the goal is to find a guy who will both say and show that he cares for you. i have never seen a guy so keen to listen to me in my life. it i looked to see if his profile was still active and it said ‘online today’. to be honest, i’m not convinced that all the guys doing this even understand why. he then said, “maybe i am looking for a committed relationship and i just haven’t found the person to have that with yet., my story continues: the guy because of whom i had the previous question and who i have been dating for 2 months works now 16-18 hours a day and told that currently he cannot commit to a serious relationship but he is happy that we had that great 2 months and that i am in his life, he just does not have time and resource to be in our relationship as extensively as in the first 2 months. took 6 months to tell me he loved me, but still has his profile up even tho its hidden…and i just grew on him like a comfortable old shoe…lol. question: do the same mechanics apply vice versa (woman continues to browse the onlinedating site)?, i met a guy on match we were emailing back and forth for a week and then we exchanged numbers. he stopped seeing someone else that he had been having casual sex with about a week after we started seeing each other because he knew it was developing into something more. i tried to give it back last week and he told me to keep it. we have taken our relationship to the next level (if you can call it a relationship) intamacy is great. he tells me how lovely a time he had and how he doesnt kno if we will definately be able to meet again due to the situation. the next morning he cancelled, said he was not into socializing because he had a deadline to meet and he was too stressed. my thoughts are… this guy i am talking to and “having fun” with i will continue to do just that and will never tell him to take his profile down. thing is in the begining he was referring to our future hopefully it would lead toi marriage and refferred me as his wife, love etc.” i then printed this section out and asked him again if he was cheating on the internet and he looked me straight in the eyes and said: “definitely not”. you know i’m not a bad person and i did try to tell you i wasn’t thinking us in a relationship would work. if he’s introducing this way to some people but that way to other people, i think you have a right to know where you stand. but also texts me and tells me how much he misses me and how much he dreams about me, blah, blah, blah. actually, he kind of chased me online for a week before i gave in and talked to him. and he went on to say he thinks we may be meant to be together but struggles with being unsure.. im not proud of myself but again it felt so so right, i had fallen for him through all these months. what’s bothering me now is that he’s been acting differently towards me ever since. he will not trust you if you do not back them up with actions: no more hurt feelings talks, no more nagging, no more demands. regardless of the challenges faced, i want someone who brings out the best in me – and he brings out a side of me i haven’t seen in years that i love. did a very filtered search on the website and discovered a replica account without a public picture. hours from where i live, so we knew that dating each other wouldn’t be that easy, but we also said to each other that we would make it work. i treat him so well, cook, clean, and care for his kids but yet i seem to have no standing with him. i am still not sure how to handle the situation. we talk on the phone most nights since we are busy and live about 45 minutes away from each other. then another week started - he texted a few times over the week and “liked” fb posts from days earlier - as in, he had to be on my wall scrolled way down to see them and not as they happened. initially struggled with online dating but over time became quite successful using it. i have never done online dating myself but because of my boyfriends profile i now log in under a fake profile every day to check his activity. partner and i met in la, flirted for a week, and then had a one-night stand. i’m afraid if i put my profile back up that it will make the situation worse, plus i really don’t want to.” so i admitted what i had done, he got mad that i didn’t trust him, and i got mad that he was still on there. i asked my friends boyfriends/husbands (some of whom met my friends online and some who are or have dated online in the past) they all confirmed clearly that if the guy dosn’t remove his profile voluntarily following the moment when it is obvious you are both moving towards proper committment (and not even ‘by the time’ you have committed to exclusivity verbally) then it is clear he is not entirely certain about you or he is not entirely ready to committ to a relationship. this point i don’t want to even mention to him that i’m aware he’s quite active, especially on match which my sister says allows for various forms of communication with people unlike the site i’d met him on, where his original profile remains active. we are both very well established and pleasing to the eye. however, i know has has a dating profile because a few weeks after we started dating my friend who uses the site told me she saw a profile for him. the next morning he begged to meet me and we agreed to brunch on sunday (9 jan). we worked things out and he promised me he would delete it asap. well he blew up and i blew him off for three days till he finally manipulated me back into seeing him through constant texting. i slightly said some of my concerns today (coming off as joking) and he lied and said he hasn’t been online since the time of our date to take his profile down. my feelings for him were getting so deep and i wanted to be his gf. should i have her make a date with him and me show up? we have been itimate and he told me he hasn’t been with anyone since he broke off his engagement last summer. he even introduced me as his fiancee once, and all his friends know about me. but i am afraid to back away, because i have done it so many times already, in a huff and frustration 'flight' mode that he will just take it as me repeating my patterns and think i haven't changed. you just never know but i have given up on online dating. he was on a stay-cation (had to use days so he didn't lose them) a couple weeks ago, and he even stopped by to see me at work because he missed me. you learn not to take a man’s silence personally, you can, with a good attitude, put yourself back into sight and into mind by sending him these friendly undemanding “fyi’s. i know it sounds petty but he is being petty by saying stuff like that to you and even being on those sites. i like to stay chill, but it’s hard when the person i deeply like and have put a lot of time into isn’t willing to sacrifice his current dating life while i am. the only interaction i have had with match is when i open to delete the wink/emails sent to my personal yahoo account. i asked about it and to his credit -it is an old flame and he hasn’t been on the site since april. have been on 5 dates with a guy who i met online, i really like him & feel like we have a good connection, but he has not yet mentioned exclusivity & deleting our profiles. i stupidly rang him and asked if he wanted to be with me. six weeks ago i met a guy from an online dating site.
How to avoid the let's just be friends axe
we dated for a year and then we moved in together. after almost 4 months, i was really falling for him, and had stopped dating other guys after month 3. he promised again he would delete it as soon as he can get back on and he promised i would never have to go through something like that again. i really do love him and want to be with him, everything would be great if i could just figure out how to get him off those sites., the not knowing how to deactivate the account doesn’t fly and i bet if you deactivated it for him he’d get upset (well, from what you describe…that’s just a guess). he told my fake profile to understand that he’s looking for a ‘soulmate’ – really? but i question to myself how long is he going to be so busy for, this is his job, he says he will change it when he gets a serious relationship so he can be more available for the woman. yet my gut says there is something not right about his profile being up still. he knows that i will soon live where he lives because that is my future plan (even before i met him) – which is four months from now. do text and talk on the phone quite often but i had came to realise that its already been 3 months and his profile is still active and he goes on it quite often. then i can still look online and see that he is on those sites almost everyday. and no a guy views dating so differently to us that it can only be expected that removing his profile is repeatedly a delayed occurrence. again, not with any type of ultimatum, but i’d let her know that you’d be interested in concentrating on dating each other exclusively. unfortunately it seems that at this point you should have a conversation with him about this and where he sees things going…i’d hate to think that he’d be using you for a place to live (and hopefully that’s not it). i guess i’m writing because it seems like we have a good connection and that he likes me (he even told me so) but he hasn’t made a move to discuss exclusivity and he doesn’t seem like he’s interested in giving up his profile. he told me the thing’s he told my fake profile weren’t true – ‘i was obviously trying to pick her up – would i tell her i am seeing or sleeping with someone? again he pushed it back on me and i had had enough. he tells me to look after myself and tries to make the goodbye casual and jokey…. i want to trust him, but my heart doesn’t understand why we’re not together if he “loves” me?’ve been dating the same guy for 4 months and today i asked him where i stand and he is not answering me back is he hiding something from me. i knew it was going to be tough but hey, it was only for a few weeks, and we promised each other that everything would be fine, that he would be fine.. and then back to the sex thing he thinks he was going to get some from me but i told him not till “the break is over and the sites are deleted” (this is all texting btw) and he goes “you’re demanding stuff because you said were not going to have sex till i delete match”…ummm duh… i said yes and i have a good point to, that don’t you think? we were out for 10+ hours and he was telling me he hasn’t been out in a while or on a real date in almost 5 years..Keep in mind it wasnt more than extremely friendly and jokey………. he is now back on the dating website daily again. i do need to sit down with him face to face and ask him but i just never seem to have the confidence to do so as i worry i am being too demanding. i had touched on a similar topic last year in my post my boyfriend has kept his online dating profile active. i’ve met his friends and he’s met my friends and some of my family. in the meantime, sending those fyi's and practicing patience helps you not only for this relationship but these skills and perspective will help with all future relationships with men. he’s a great guy, doesn’t have much friends but come on… i’m not sure if i’m being too stubborn. over the past few weeks we’ve been out a couple of times which has been nothing short of fantastic! you’re not sure how to approach it, i’d basically let him know what you told me: you feel bad for snooping but you were suspicious and now you’re very hurt by what you found. the end, i chose to believe him, forgive him, and continue our relationship. don’t start making a demands on the 30th day just because i suggest a month as a good measurement. lauren, this is a follow up from my previous post of few months back. 5 days later – screen shots proved he had just been online and active. and i hope it goes without saying that when you enter a relationship where you both are only interested in each other, at that point the multiple dating would stop! i am in the same boat and i wil be having a discussion with my so called guy about this asap. i have active accounts on the on line sites as well but its been months since ive even thought to look at them. i asked him if dating or seeing somebody and he replied he is dating here and there and kinda seeing someone but nothing serious. he will be turning 30 soon and i am 6 years younger. we were out with his family and friends yesterday and i just happened to catch a text message on his phone that said “what are you doing babe” to the very same girl. i’m having doubts if he’s still interested but i view his page anonymously and he hasn’t been active for 2 weeks and also removed his pictures. are you ok with easier opportunities via online dating while shagging her? means he is brilliant at slaying the dragon right in front of him (work) and less brilliant at writing a shopping list at the same time (pursuing you. i had asked him about this issue a few times and each time he just informs me that he is not cheating on me or dating anyone else. i know he was aware that i disabled my profile because he can check it. i have been seeing this guy for two months and we’ve gotten fairly close. anyway, last week his sister had been awful to me and i was home alone and upset. if being online and chatting to other girls was face to face lets say and you met a man in this way. i asked if he was okay and he replied, "just being here with you, and kissing y. kinda confuses me…but i have created a fake profile on the same site with no picture and said that i don’t have any kids and made myself 2 inches taller and also put that i live in the town i grew up in. i did my usual hey there sexy, he said lol…i asked him how his work thing was going, no response. current boyfriend had just gotten out of an eight year relationship (married for four years) and we started out just having sex. said he is only seeing me and i shouldn’t worry…but…should i? lauren, this morning i was feeling especially miserable about my boyfriend of 9 months being less attentive to me, especially since he got this new job and he is putting in numerous hours of driving and work time. approach it from the stance that you want to understand where he’s coming from (but also that you think you should be taking the profiles down). i understand we never comitted ourselves to each other, sohe has every rigt to. he responded the next day in a text saying he was suffering from a bad cold, and said that was great news. currently we still keep some contact and meet once a week. in your case, he asked you to be his girlfriend…he needs to cut out the unnecessary continuation of online dating now. after a few days, i told him i’d done that and asked if he would. to make a long story short, he and i are perfect together in every way but, there won’t be a fairy tale ending where we live happily ever after, not after tonight. which btw still says “singe” and “actively seeking a relationship”. i started by telling him i wasn’t ready to move in together and needed more time. you are risking stds,emotionally injuring people who deserve respect and maybe losing out on a really good person., i don’t think after two months anyone would accuse you of “rushing”., let’s just say for example he was doing it because he was bored, but had no other intentions… well even that is dangerous because i personally know so many couples who have broken up over facebook accounts, comments, pics etc… it always just starts so innocently, a person looks cute, they say hello and that could lead to a full blown relationship/affair/fling. i said it was up to him (i want him to take it down because he wants to not because i want him to…) i did say that him keeping his profile active made me feel that he wished to keep his options open and that if he wanted me to feel that way then to carry on. we hit it off and are still seeing each other. – if i understand correctly, you’re saying that if he doesn’t decide to take his profile down in 6 weeks then you’ll not talk with him about it and just end things? i found he was still on there, not just on there, but online now and he had added a new picture with a shirt that i got for him for christmas. can someone, please explain to me what is going on because i see it as one thing and one thing only, i am being deceived in a very cruel way as he is clearly preoccupied with pursuing other women on dating sites. i added however, i know he wouldn’t take advantage of my kindness, and that i want him to feel hugged and to stay safe and alert out there. don't give a man the perks of being a girlfriend without have the mutual agreement that you are his girlfriend. he picked me up from my hotel and we headed out for dinner. i have some serious trust issues from being cheated on in past relationships, but i’m trying not to let that cloud my judgement. i just assume that if someone really likes you, then they would delete their online profile right away and they wouldn’t be so afraid of commitment. i’m assuming it’s been decided that you would date each other exclusively if he’s saying that he loves you. but do you think what we have now can get any deeper. she later said she would do the same and we took off the auto-renewal but we both never bothered to hide our profiles. i still believe what i wrote there, i’m finding that many of the women who are contacting me are not at the point where they are sure if the man is their “boyfriend” or not. the next day i called him and told me that he was very much disappointed in me because i was better than that(i got drunk the night before ) . i’ll replay some of the ugly stuff i learned about him like a broken record in my head and it gets me all tied up in knots again. he told me he’s not into the casual thing with other girls, i know he’s active on his dating profile. 2 - i messaged him again later to say i had just finished working and did he feel like a chat. i met someone online a year ago and we started dating six months ago. nevertheless, i was shocked and disappointed when he told me one morning that he had been on a date. sent the email not as an ultimatum but just as an fyi… and i am sure he will stay on line until he decides what he is looking for and if in fact it is in me. and i must add, only contacted when he is in between "interests". since our relationship has been a bit all over the place for these months, should i have even brought up the topic? it may be that he’s being honest and he’s only seeing you but the whole “actions speak louder than words” thing isn’t doing him any favors and were i in a situation like yours i would want to let him know that. we lived together over a year later and then he one day just moved out. yeah, it would be nice if when he got the “hi” email if he would have said to himself, “oh, that reminds me, i should hide my profile! i’ve been to a work picnic once but haven’t met his friends . have been dating this guy i met on okcupid for a few months now. the site was deleted and i never heard anything else about it. if i get through an emotionally challenging situation and my casual sex partner stays by side and supports me throughout it, the relationship generally evolves into something more meaningful. a couple months ago i started to have a “gut” feeling that he was doing things that he didn’t want me to know about. i’m sure this will make him angry but it will be pretty hard for him to deny (and i get the feeling that you’re going to have to accept him getting angry if you want to pursue solving this problem, regardless of how you approach it). neither of us were looking for a relationship, but we didn't want to lose the connection we seemed to have. in the browser history i was looking to see if he had been viewing porn websites when i noticed a dating website there. we met later that day and he told me his friend had informed him earlier in the week that i’d been on it a bit and he was shocked and angry and that’s why he used this other profile. i made it clear that i was not looking to settle down, but did want to continue dating him to see where it could lead, but could only do it if neither of us were going to continue to see other people. met my boyfreind on the site in april 2012, we spoke over txt for like 3 weeks and met up. “if then it dosn’t work out boys – by all means go back online, chat and date all the people in the world that you desire! if we are “monogamous” should we even have these sites up?? and do u think he is using me for sex ? i had been overwhelmed by how into me he was - like over the top into me - missing me constantly, always wanting to see me, sooo "happy to have me with him". i even told him i had to get his confirmation because i have trust issues with previous guys cheating on me. she was also recently out of a bad relationship and not looking to get caught up in another. he got angry and said he wasn’t doing anything like that and he would take it off when he thought the time was right. i know he got my messages yesterday i messaged him on facebook and it tells you exactly when he read it which was this morning around 8.! imagine him reading it and you’ve got yourself a connection! we have a lot of common interests and have so much fun together, but have had a couple of awkward conversations about exclusivity and where this may be heading. i think he was looking for something casual and i was looking for a summer fling, just someone to hang out and have sex with before i went back to college 12 hours away. gaining my trust, after my past, is not an easy task and he has managed to do it. anyway, he tells me that he doesn’t have the desire to talk to or see anyone else. about three months into dating, i knew i was starting to fall in love with him and i was bothered that his profile was still active, he would be on at least every other day. i txtd him the next afternoon when he said he was done work, and asked him if he could meet me somewhere because i needed to talk to him, i was having a bad day (it actually wasn’t about him, rather than my pseudo grandfather had fallen ill, and i just needed a shoulder to cry on). a week or so later me and my boyfriend have a massive argument and i (terribly i know) end up kissing this other guy.How Do You Know Your Partner Is the One? | A Cup of Jo
Problems with Diving into a Dating Relationship Too Soon
had not been looking at emails that came from his dating site, let along responding to them. i do think the exclusive conversation could be very tough before you meet, but if you find you keep worrying about it and you think you’re at a place where he’d be open to it, i’d bring that conversation up. stop fooling one another with the notion that we should not have expectations. we also slept with each other…yes i know it probably wasn’t smart to have sex on the first date, but after talking to each other that much, i think we both just went with the flow. and barely said much at all…this past week i got a bad feeling so checked the dating site where we met, and his profile (which wasn’t there a week before) was back up. as we walked into the club he held my hand and made it known that i was with him. i took mine down right away and i just figured he always had his up. i can totally understand having caution after being cheated on, but at the same time you don’t want to wait months and months only to find out this might not go anywhere. i have been told by a close friend (who is male) that i need to be chased and show him that i am not at his beck and call. know other men who do this sort of thing, i am no stalker, just keeping my heart in check here. the subject is in your email subject line and says: so and so sent you an email. i think having the talk on this will clear that up and if he still won’t take his profile down, i think that will be the sign that something is really wrong. we had a look and he has changed his profile to looking for women for friends. i mean he seems like a decent guy and all but i guess i’m just worried. but if you are not satisfied and you are prepared to move on, do it. part of me wants to take their advice and let him know that i am hurt by his actions. i know it’s annoying but he’s being open about it and i don’t feel like anything you describe is “shady” (yet). then he proceeded to tell me that his son is now starting a traveling basketball team and would have even less time to spend with me. this point when he gets your messages, he will not associate your name with fun memories and sexy times. in the first few weeks we were together i was worried about how my daughter would react to being around a new guy. he called that night and we talked for hours about nothing. i want to be with you if you want a relationship with me, i don’t want to be with you if you’re only deleting it to have sex with me and he goes “of course not” and i said the whole match thing adds a lot of confusion to me. then a day later i saw him driving around, i called him not to initially bring anything up, but when he didn’t answer we got into it and he said that he does want stuff to work but i can’t be so paranoid. he’s military, so his schedule is pretty screwy, but since my work schedule is easily manipulated, he proposed that i get it to match it as closely to his as possible so we have the same days off. here we are, i have doubts and feel uneasy about the whole thing. the real question is, are you getting enough of your needs met so that this relationship makes you happy and enriches your life?” today, i emailed him and asked him if he is dating people from the site and that we should both take our sites down and focus on each other. i met a man on match about 4 months ago, and things have been wonderful. the other day i did have to make a little remark where i said, you know…i know you arent in this for the long hall, (i only said this because when he told me he loved me, he also said…”this doesnt mean i necessarily feel i want to spent the rest of my life with you…wtf? we slept with each other again, and we also hit it off in that department too 😉 so everything was really awesome and i just thought “i hope it’s not too good to be true! it sucked because my friend offered to give me rides to his dorm but now that’s canceled. i wonder why dating is so hard for myself but seems so easy for others. and how much can i really mean to him and can he really love me if he keeps doing what he knows hurts me so much. had been having casual sex with a friend of mine from high school around the beginning of my junior year of college. we have been calling/texting each other about everyday since we met online. have met an army man on an online dating site about 6 weeks ago, and we pretty much hit it off right from the beginning. in the meantime brad he treats me very well and has introduced me to his parents and all his friends. i’d hope that he’d respond positively and remove it. he said that he doesn’t use it and doesn’t care about it and was planning on taking it down. the guy says is very pleased that i'm interested but wants me to make the right decision, and we agree to "see how it goes". slept together after about 5 dates and it just felt right but neither of us mentioned about being exclusive, i think we both took it we were only seeing and sleeping with each other, at this point he was still active on site but my time on there was becoming less. he always tells me that he has a great time with me and i’m his favorite person, but that he never dated much when he was younger and thinks he owes it to himself to date around now. i thought it was odd he said that, since i was being understanding to his situation. he stopped and stood up, and i looked up at him. or to try and keep a friendship if we cant hav more maybe? he came back all defensive asking me why i would say such a thing and of course he is. so someone else will get to reap the benefits of my work 🙁. then, we realized we were spending 24/7 together for months without getting sick of each other. i got my revenge though and set him up by using a friend’s profile to catch a great big rat (and even though it was me he was writing to he still lied and lied and lied) and i caught him out big time. if i had met him at the pub, i would have met his friends & seen his place. i realised it was early days and though it hurt i let it go. i was chatting/emailing a guy for about a month, we met and seemed to get along really well. during that party, it seemed we really connected and that our connection grew exponentially stronger and we got much closer. he apologized for being distant but said he was so angry and just had to focus on that. for the past 2, months we continued to text just as much, we talked on the phone a lot less due to our now conflicting schedules, and we saw each other once every 2 weeks give or take a few days. and my rule for kate is “just let me know what you’re thinking”. when i didn’t hear from this guy till friday afternoon, i was in no mood to wait and was not happy and you can understand why since i had spent all my patience with my ex. and after a few mins said i needed to go. both accounts are still “active” technically, but there hasn’t been any activity on either. i think doing this can be beneficial because a) you might find a great guy who does want to commit or b) he might realize how much it sucks to have the person you’re dating to be open to dating other people. his response was “that the site is for friends, just like facebook” i said him he has got to be kidding because it is a dating site not a friend site and what would he do when girls want to meet him? recently, we met up for the first time and we hit it off pretty well. he asked me a month into the relationship to be his girlfirend ive met his family and friends. am a woman in my early 50’s and i have been dating my boyfriend who is a year older than me for about 8 months. he said we are not dating but we couldn’t establish any status quo. after the month of him being gone, he got a hotel room and i stayed with him for a few days, hanging out non stop except when i have to go to work. surprising truth about dating a selfish man (or a series of selfish men). dating bloghis dating profile is still active – is he interested or not? he not only read the email but he also viewed my profile. i did confront him to discuss it but now i realise i did so – not to understand him – but only with a view to declaring that he had failed, that i don’t ‘share’ and therefore we couldn’t continue in this state. if you haven’t agreed to be exclusive, i feel this is the point that the relationship would need to reach before you would be in a position of strength to ask that the profile be removed. on the other hand he stepped out of a 10 year old non-working relationship because of me and i know that his ex girlfriend is still nagging him in text messages continuously. he was bored, and it made him feel good about himself. is not a river in egypt and you can do a non member search to check if he or she has lied to you before. you can read a book together but if he turns around and starts putting a profile online, what good has it done? he came all the way here (drove 40 minutes in practically a blizzard), and his birthday was three days ago so i made him a cute blanket. there were a lot of other things said, and over the course of numerous conversations. i gave him about a one-minute explanation over the phone, broke it off, and have not looked back. few days later i log back onto the online chat room we met on seven moneths ago, i made a new profile and he was online…………. my profile was still up i did message him while he was online and made a little joke about him being there one day and his response was that when people make the effort they at least deserve a polite ‘no thank you’…but that’s been a month ago. i’ve seen this with some regularity talking to people over the years and while i can’t say for certain, that might be what’s going on here. i admitted to snooping through his phone, and laid out everything i had found and discovered. and if i do, i’ll have to tell him it’s a real relationship or nothing. dont let guys get you down find someone who actually wants to talk to you who actually wants to take you out who actually wants to hear about your day men can multi-task and men can connect but if hes not that into you he will forget y. i know that’s easier said than done but if you do end up dating him again just be very cautious…sounds to me like he would have cheated on you if he would have had the chance. have offered her to check my username/password to see that i do not have a subscription, told her to send me winks/emails to test it, want her to check her email message and see if her status changes, offered to call match to show my log on status, and now seeking advice. never apologize for checking up on a person who has lied to you and promises to do better. am struck by how similar my experience is to so many others. after about a month of frequent hookups though, i felt myself falling for her. again he didn’t pay for me he has never paid for me and i don’t run up big bills max but he won’t. all that being said, i do have some family issues in my life, i have a brother who has a drug/alcohol problem who is always getting in trouble that i have to look out for, my mother passed away 5 years ago but it still feels like yesterday. this online dating drama made me push him & drove him ‘crazy’. are you both okay having profiles up and options available?. and one week discussing a possible vacation to meet somewhere in the middle and see each other after doing some planning and wanting to share these ideas and excitement with him, it blows up in my face because he says he needs the week off to himself in his home town. he sent an angry email saying he was working 14-hour days and couldn’t deal with this right now and that all he has to offer is friendship. when we were saying goodbye i told him i would miss him and he said i am already missing you’. she showed me the profile and it said he was interested in meeting women for dates. was a booty call by my now-wife on thanksgiving of 2000., i find really annoying is when he informs me that he is not cheating on me but why is he still on the dating site. have to admit, it’s been a bit tumultuous for me emotionally sometimes. over the course of the next month we continued seeing each other and had several attempts at “the talk”. so looks like he pulled one over on me and is still online. we are both almost 30 years old, and i really want to believe him. the next day i was hanging with a friend and he stayed in his hometown for his bro's b-day –all pre-planned and normal. so anyway, i message him and he message me back.! i said i really like you and have knocked back dates from others too as i was seeing and sleeping with him, he said, he knocked back dates too!, my story continues: the guy because of whom i had the previous question and who i have been dating for 2 months works now 16-18 hours a day and told that currently he cannot commit to a serious relationship but he is happy that we had that great 2 months and that i am in his life, he just does not have time and resource to be in our relationship as extensively as in the first 2 months. you do not know after a month of seeing someone if you would like to eliminate the rest to give her a fair shake, recognize that there is something that is not resonating for you and the best course of action is to be direct and tell her.) – i’m glad my thoughts were helpful but at the same time i don’t want to come off as if i was saying you were “wrong” in your approach. i guess you could say we were both open minded in terms of meeting someone and what the relationship could look like, but neither of us took being in a relationship or in love very seriously for a long time due to wounded hearts and trust issues from prior relationships. i believed him, and told him not to test me like that again – be honest with me and talk to me about what he wants to know. i dont know, but the last time i tried to have an indepth discussion about something with him he said i was “pushing” him and we broke up for 2 weeks. he can get you a hotel room and take you on a road trip but logging into a website and removing his profile is beyond his time and resources? my sister looked on her computer from he account as she is on there, too. after about 6 weeks he freaked out and said he wanted to feel more “single” and that he wasn’t sure we were right for each other. i have only been seeing this guy for three weeks. she is now mad at me because she thinks i want to date other people and i am just like the other guys that hurt her. this morning i decided to reciprocate the photo txt, and i sent him one (nothing i would be ashamed of though if someone else saw), and i sent a message along with it that said good morning 😉 it’s been a good 20 minutes since i’ve sent it, and in another 15 i know he’ll be at work and therefore wont text me.!, conversation was boring and didnt amount to anything so i just blanked him and deleted profile. i want to give him the benefit of the doubt but the miles between us and the unknown are really bring out the jealousness in me and i don’t like it.. which is solely his decision… however i have the right to vocalize my thoughts which is what i did… i would never tell him to close his account and also to those of you that are upset that you man has his account out there… how do you know unless yours is out there or you are still online?
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20 minutes later he texted and told me i was far hotter’ in person. have had a 5-6 really great dates, chemistry off the charts, met his daughter, spent a weekend with him. i expressed the same feelings and we planned to move in together two weeks from now. i started having casual sex with a new coworker during my period of casual hook-ups. and i am not going to ask him about what he wants to do. he’s an adult and for whatever reason, this is the choice he’s making right now. so for the first time, i decided to do some checking, and did a search on his profile username. i have no idea how he’ll respond and whether he wants to keep seeing other people, as he had stated his doubts about our relationship before when we broke up. i hope we can talk tonight but im so confused about where i stand and don’t know what to say to him. when we were a month into our relationship i told her i was not going to renew my match subscription because i only want her. i keep creating these scenarios in my head and i know i shouldn’t. i suppose that is were trust comes into place, and mine is a bit shaken. he did not have any sent messages in his sent out box. it’s a sacrifice i’m willing to make for him – something i never would have done for anyone else. boat here…been dating my guy for 11 months now – we are both 42…. he also said that i should know that if he had a chance to get online, he would have texted me as he always does. just looking for a suggestion on how to handle this is all. we have a great time laughing, joking, talking and we both have told each how much fun we are having and how excited we are to see each ofher again. later in the week he asks if i had any cancellations and i told him i hadn’t. because we live on different hawaiian islands, we didn’t meet in person until about a month after emailing and talking. i check his page (because it’s viewable to the public) and he’s made several modifications today. so our whole relationship just moved really quickly: sex three days after meeting, definitively exclusive two weeks later, 'i love you' about two weeks after that, and i moved in (temporarily) five months later. between monday and thursday i noticed he was logging in. the song came on and he stopped talking and looked over at me, held up his hand to his friends and excused himself, walked straight over to me and took my head in his hand and leaned me back and kissed me the best kiss ever. a few weeks later we broke up for 5 days i activated my profile and gave a guy my number. but i think you’ll find it very empowering and i suspect you’ll be far less likely to put up with crap.’s natural to feel neglected and unloved when a man gets busy and you drop out of sight and out of mind. as far as the deployed thing, he is getting deployed in a few months, and this is something i knew about not long after we met. he then texted me and said he too tired was but i saw he was on his match account. we played around in the snow like little kids, cuddled, watched a movie at the theater, and got shakes. a man leaves his online dating profile active, what does it mean? was dating a girl pretty regularly, seems like it was a fwb situation, but they both clearly felt more for each other and wanted more, but couldn’t seem to make the situation work for their lives at that point yet. also, he is seeking a long term relationship and he loves love as i do (from what he’s told me). if this arrangement no longer meets your needs because you don't see an end in sight then it's time for you to end things and find a man who has a more flexible schedule. until now, nothing about him has bothered me at all, and i would hate for this to ruin what could be a great thing. we act like a couple when we are in public and he loves pda. these actions tel me that he likes me and is trying to have a serious relationship with me. if he really cares about you, being open and honest like this shouldn’t bother him. admit the date was perfect but i had bit of committment issue to because i got hurt in the past and due to this i dumped him on the third date but we quickly patched things up. he checks his emails in front of me and i didn’t think much of it that he still got emails from another dating website and he had said he couldn’t remember the password. (this is because my 20 yr old is here still and this way we can have alone time. he said he respected that about me, and that he had not seen or been with anyone else in a while. this infuriated me, and to my utter shame i called him out immediately. but revenge wasn’t sweet as he then sent me an email about his lack of self confidence and his poor self image and how it gave him such an ego boost as his mother never loved him blah, blah, blah, blah. he texts me the other day and says he it on pof just out of pure boredom and then tells me he misses me and wishes he could see me. all that doesn’t work, i’d say at some point you should just say: “so-and-so, i really enjoy spending my time with you but i worry we might be looking at our relationship differently. so i would hope her relationship with him would encourage you to be more aggressive about understanding what he’s doing. i told him i was getting a bunch of emails and just didn’t feel like dealing with them. maybe you should join all those dating sites just to piss him off! he said that he hadn’t been on that one in months and didn’t even remember the login – even though it said he had been online literally right before i called him. i recently started seeing this guy and we met through an online site a long time ago but we just started talking through facebook. and i don’t care how innocent it might be, it still hurts. he said he loved me for the first time and i said it back. we were casually talking about something and he slipped something about the site and i asked him: “wait, are u still on the site” he answered that yes he’s still on it but it’s “just there”. i would like to do things right and i might be overthinking it as my wish is to know the exact recipe, eg. and today when we were texting i said (in response to something), “i mean i like you enough to know that i don’t wanna see others. i had recently gotten out of a long relationship and wasn't interested in pursuing something serious. we had talked about it over the phone and via text message and it left me unsettled, but talking to him about it face to face has made a serious impact on how i felt. he was right where i was with my opinion, so again – a match. so i never talked to him about the dating site but i found out that he isn’t using the site we met on anymore but that he has set up an account for a totally different site and tried to hide that it’s really him so that no one will know. its been a month since we spoke/saw each other. i always liked him and thought he liked me but we were both in relationships so i didn't dwell on it. we see each other about once a week due to work and we both have kids, he has his when mine is gone to his dads. he’s removed his dating profiles, although i don’t like that i had to get very demanding about that. you care about him so it becomes harder to have no strings attached occasional sex without any expectations. i said i just needed some reassurance and he told me to be reassured. him send the little fyi note to catch my attention. i was heart broken when i saw it, and i text him right away confronting him about it…. i was able to get a hold of his phone last week and saw that he had the dating site application on it. i know its him because of the wording he used and the things he is looking for. a friend advised me to keep dating other people, but i’ve never really worked that way… but i do feel i need to back off a bit from this man. a lot of men are damaged and just don’t know how to love or be loved. since i see he’s on, i browse my matches but very rarely wink at anyone and don’t message people back (in all honesty, i kind of got sick of online dating and had just tried it because it seemed novel until that feeling wore off). after that we never said another word about it and have been hanging out like nothing happened. there will come a point that you will need to draw a line and make ultimatums but i’m not convinced one month into the relationship is that time (especially if you think you’ve found a great guy). so, while perhaps this seems immature, i got gussied up big time and decided to go out that night, knowing we were supposed to go out together later on. if you’re two months in and his profile is still up, it’s time to get your profile back up as well. we had a great weekend together just before christmas, and then we didn't see each other until valentines weekend just gone. so i know this is wrong but i decided to make a fake profile using my sister’s photos since she lives in another country. on one hand i am his emotional outlet person but he won’t commit. i checked the messages tonight and it said he was online now so i messaged him with hi how are you, he didn’t respond. if you think this is annoying i definitely understand but i would still encourage tact when you try to resolve this issue. we still text once a week and i usually text first or he does if i don’t. 2nd day i texted him at 830 am and asked him what was going on.?Now it’s been 4 months and i wanted to see if he’s being true to his promises and i decided to check. then about two months after, i went on the site with my friends user info and searched for him. during this time we talked rarely and the messages were scarce but at east every couple of days. – if the two of you are using words like “love” and “monogamous”, i think it was totally acceptable for you to bring the topic up. i've met his family and spent time with some of them. i still had my profile up and so did he. i have told my parents and he has claimed that he’s told his as well. then i saw just two months ago he was texting w/ his buddies about have spring time itch again. are going along great, he talks about the future alot, i mean making plans and things like that but he still calls me his “friend”. i was adamant that we both have space and we were not seeing each other every night of the week, even though he said he wanted to and sure tried. he doesn’t have a problem with it and i obviously don’t either. am in a new relationship and seem to be experiencing the same issue. so it concerns me when i found out that his profile is still up and he goes online like pretty much everyday.! now i’m really starting to panic – so without hesitation and with some authority, i look him straight in the eyes and tell him in front of everyone – ‘that is not a for sure thing yet, as we still have not talked about the details’. then today he calls me like nothing’s wrong and when he could tell i was uneasy talking to him he made a big fuss and said ‘well i can tell you’re in a bad mood so bye. mine is pretty similar however, like most others, i really don’t know how to handle it. – it sounds like the confusing areas in your relationship might go beyond just the dating profile. have been dating this guy i met from online for about 3 months now, everything was amazing in the beginning. – have you tried talking with him about this more aggressively? i did ask him two months ago to tell me if he wasn’t interested in me he just had to tell me. he said we were more than fwb's and a convo took place where he said we were a couple and we were exclusive. he remains curious and i increasingly uncertain of where i stand. met him through an online dating site six months ago. has his ego been hurt that i was online when he had removed the earlier account? or maybe he’s doing this to get my fake profile girl. on monday he was supposed to call me but he went to the gym late which he normally does and said he would let me know if he wasn’t too tired for a call. he seems like a great guy, and the compliments are flowing but something is off.” he took my hand, placed it on his chest which was beating as fast as mine and said with a smile “it’s what happens when you’re falling in love” a few days later, he updated his headline on pof to “undecided” —- i dont even know what that means. it feels so much like a relationship and that he is warminig to the idea, but we havent discussed it cos we cant due to his parents and their plans for him. i understand not wanting to fight and dropping it but his excuse for being on the site was pretty weak…. there is no shame in publicly searching as a guest when he has or she has already lied or had been interested in emails and winks from people on there once exclusive. but the desire became stronger, and we decided to commit. – i guess i don’t understand what the difference is between being exclusive and being boyfriend/girlfriend. i’ve been dating a guy now i met online for almost four months now. on the other hand, i feel like i’m getting mixed signals re. i had been working on ending it with the other guy for a while, but guilt over his feelings being hurt kept me there until i met my current partner. been in a fwb relationship that evolved into a long-term.
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Thinking Of Our Relationship, Thinking Of You, Boyfriend Poem my advice to you is to keep to your word and not sleep together again. relationships are unique things and you’ll need to decide when it is best in yours to start demanding more…but at some point he will need to commit or you will need to move on. when i saw him last night i casually (on the outside) mentioned when deleting my profile that i’d seen he was still going online. it hurt so badly, and it made me feel extremely dirty and disrespected that he would mess around with me and talk to others the same day. have absolutely no clue what to do and i hope you can help me. online dating was an avenue i hadn’t tried and i was curious! my ‘dating’ experience had been extremely limited, despite being married and divorced twice. how do i let what would normally be a wonderful relationship (if it were not for his dating profile) progress, or how do i let it go? i don’t want to be walked over, and i don’t want to turn into one of those girls who checks up on him…. keep your options open and don’t care too much about what the men do…care about how it makes you feel..My friends think i need to drop this whole situation, but he was in my life for so long, i did feel the love for him deep down inside and something would feel weird in my life when we wouldn't talk. had trouble getting her on the phone as thats something shes uncomfortable with and shes unsure about being able to visit cause of money going towards a course..so along along he was active and looking for talking to, meeting up with other woman. then, one day, out of the blue i decided to see if he was still using the dating site and he was online and chatting with girls. where he stands may not be where you hope, but he should still know where that is! if you can’t get a guy to commit to date you exclusively (and especially if he then lies about it), he may be a giant waste of time. he is super attentive when we are together, has introduced me to all of his friends who have warmly accepted me into their circle as one of their own. last week we went out for meal, he came back to mine, we slept together again, he went home that nite, he txt me as usual to say he got home, we said it was a lovely nite and then good nite to one another. that was fine, i did keep a check to see if hed come on and there was nothing for a few days and now its started again, hes been on and off for the last few days now. it’s just what always happens to me and i really would appreciate it if you would tell me what my next move should be and how this should turn out/how he feels and what he may be thinking. on the other-hand, if everything is fine and he’s just been busy you’ve done no harm and might even kick-start things again. when we are together his behavior to me in without fault and amazingly caring. how can a man give me a stupid meaningless ring and tell me he can’t to get married to me etc and then do something wreckless? he never checked to see i made it there or home safely, and hasn’t really been in contact the way he was before i left. he claimed a guy he worked with asked him to check out and see if his wife was messing around. for the most part i have tried very hard to be the feminine energy in this relationship and wait for him to call and ask for dates. friend of mine said that he is a pisces and thats just the way they are. i’m pretty sure that my wife would be upset if i flirted with other women and told her it didn’t mean anything or that it was an ego thing. i have dated my share of immature guys and he sound like one in my book. i messaged a guy on a dating site and we texted for weeks before finally meeting up. i told her i recently gotten an email and deleted it but i have not been on in a long time. he pointed out to me the other day that he has a hard time showing affection and was asking why i stayed with him. on sunday (and i knew he was going to do this) he cancelled saying he had to go to meet his folks for lunch he didn’t even reschedule. we actually met up about a month ago and got along great and have a lot of fun together. he asked me to come to his area next time and i just nodded. there’s the possibility of a move for him in the future after his military career ends, and he has asked me to go with him if that possibility becomes a reality – i accepted. he is a computer programmer and is working on a very intense project, working 17 hour days! find someone who makes things easy for you, not hard and stressful. if you see that he’s active all the time, you could send him an email from your dating account to his and ask him why he’s so active on the site. we definitely argued a bit and i told him to go on a date, if he liked the girl, we were done (obviously). i was shocked and sad about it, of course, especially since we just had spent a great weekend together but only met twice so far. we both want a faithful and loyal partner, and since his last girlfriend cheated on him constantly while he was deployed to iraq (3 times), he said he really doesn’t have time for games. have been dating a guy for 5 weeks, been out 12 times w/a couple of overnights. i know it hurts right now but i suspect it will be for the best in the long run and i’m glad it didn’t go on any longer than it did if he’s (finally) being honest with how he feels. then he will always know that i found out and, the guilt he may feel could jeopardise our relationship. i checked online today and it said that he was online today. told me the first day i hadnt talked to him that he forgot his phone at his friends, and id like to believe him but now 2 more days of him not talking to me much i dont know what to think… my friends tell me to give him space so im gonna work on not trying to contact him as much today. i said at one point that as the distance wasn't working and because we were just friends with benefits we might as well call it a day and both meet people more local to us. have for the most part what i tell my friends an “effortless relationship”. she said all the right things and we spoke of only being interested in each other. saw texts between him and his hockey buddies about how he wants to f*% everybody and how we was getting that ‘spring time itch’ really bad. at the year mark of our hooking up, he told me he loved me and we've been together since (three years now — though on and off and rocky). i took some time to reflect and by the end of the week i realized how much i missed him.. but at the same time i cant understand the need to have a conversation with guys on a dating site? he said that his ex did not want his daughter at my house anymore and that was that. 10 minutes int the call he got a call from his boss and said he would call me back. a month ago, i complained about his dating profile still being active. there are some great guys using dating services but sometimes it takes having a good deal of patience to find them. i just said sorry i missed his call and hope he was having a nice weekend with his son, and three days later i have yet to hear back from him. we had a mild argument about what was going on, and what it came down to was i told him don’t take me for a fool, and don’t take me for granted. and he said he had logged in to show his friends my picture that i was the highlight of the weekend. i’ve met his family and friends, he takes me out everywhere and even wants to book time off with me. i suppose if she’s just dating you casually, it may be less stressful to think that you might be cheating on her. this isn't to say that the majority of the people with whom we have casual sex evolve into committed relationships; rather, it generally doesn't happen. i checked, and again i was right on the money (i should have read this blog before so i did not do what i did again) i called him out, this time he flat out lied and got verbally abusive. he asks me out every weekend and also at least once during the week. – my personal opinion is that you have every right to be concerned. no wonder so many lose faith in the online dating venue. you have an understanding about men and how they work that your friends don't have. would it be acceptable if he continued to go along to such events and chat and flirt with other girls? we dated for two months before we became intimate and i just assumed that we were exclusive. we have limited time to spend together as it is, since we are both single parents and have joint custody. i try not to pressure him about it and he hasn’t been dishonest with me. he always will have one job and continue to look for a bigger and better job even if he has no intention of leaving the one that he has. that’s like saying, “the 0 i spent on my subscription is more important than what i have with you”. kinda freaked me out a little when i looked at it and realized. you care for him and while some of his actions declare he feels the same way, other actions make things less clear. men are slower to commit and many also need their ego “stroked”. he promised that was not his intention and again said he would take his profile down, but needed help because he couldn’t figure it out.’d vote for opening up more and letting him know how you feel…but not necessarily in one big conversation. i know that when you are dating you should do this but i just can’t and he said he was the same. i checked, and he’s been online in the past 4 hours. he replies within a min and we text for hours until i get sleepy and tired. but tell me, how is it that you can get so close to someone physically and claim to have neither attraction nor feelings? but he’s still so kind to me to help me in my time of need. the time august 2014 (now one year of dating), he was spending every night at my house, we practically lived together, even though he still had his own home. unfortunately, this, at times, has resulted in different levels of physical and psychological violence. he had deactivated ,blocked me and deleted his old account so that it had looked to me he was offline yet had reopened a new one! we are 4 months into the relationship and he still says he’s scared of commitment.'s working at max capacity trying to succeed in work and in this relationship and you've shown him that his efforts are not good enough. and as i touched on earlier, i do think it’s reasonable to demand respect from these guys. i was upset since according to dating norm he should have paid. the thought of breaking up comes from an old experience (90/10 rule) where the guy got out from our relationship after one year dating by simply disappearing from one day to another. have read that many complaints from match is the status option is flawed and can be triggered from simply receiving and deleting a email from match in your personal account.’m so grateful to have come across your article here and am impressed by the fact that you’ve continued to respond to commenters for over 4 years now, wow! we haven’t talked about exclusivity yet, because i don’t want to pressure him. are brilliant at multitasking because we have 8 times more connector cells in our brain than a man. long story short, he came and picked me up from the club i was at and he knew i was upset with him. i don't know if little fyi texts will be a stepping stone in the right direction and how long to give it if he shows little interest, or if it is so over? no shame in protecting your biggest investment: your self esteem and right to know who you are in bed with…. he goes out of his way to text me just to say hi, good morning, or see how my day is going. then yesterday - on my birthday, day after this convo, he posts “happy birthday, sweetie! didn’t see an email from you yet, but i know i’m being anxious and impatient 🙂 thanks again for your great blog. he even said never look a gift horse in the mouth’ and i asked who is the gift horse, you or me? i drank more than usual and i became very intoxicated . i made up a fake profile and decided to check to see if he would respond. next morning he tried to cancel and i wouldn’t allow it. this last weekend he finally got the courage to inform his mother that he had proposed (6 months ago! he said he felt the same but that he liked the way his life was and that he didn’t want things to change, but the next night he came over & we slept together. i was living in the belief that he had deleted his site and i didn’t even doubt him about it for a second, sine he had promised me he would. then if it doesn’t, you could tell him a friend told you that she saw him actively online and you could ask why his profile is still active. we met later that evening and had a good conversation where i told him to ask the next time. he said that he is very much excited in seeing and dating me, and already planned on where we would go. i don’g want to pushtowards anything, because i feel as thoughhe will if he wants to…but am i wasting my heart on someone whois using me as plan b or using me as a passing fancy? i am protecting myself from a man who had to answer an email to some woman on a dating site to be respectful. we’ve skyped almost every night for 4+ hours a night, and we text all day. when we were a month into our relationship i told her i was not going to renew my match subscription because i only want her. he seems like he isn’t interested in maintaining our relationship anymore and i’m not sure why.!2 days ago i checked to see if he had taken his pof profile down (along with another one i had found several months ago – sexsearch dating site). she is now mad at me because she thinks i want to date other people and i am just like the other guys that hurt her. so i think that my conclusion is he just isn't the kind of guy i am want - lacks thoughtfulness, ability to be honest and open about why he wants to end it etc.
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Dating secrets: 10 red flags and other secrets women need to know we’ve had this dang conversation at least 4 or more times! and that he stays online because he is afraid of closing all doors and just be with me, the first woman. i called him the next day to discuss my feelings and he said he wanted to still see me, but wanted to take a step back. we haven’t talked about exclusivity yet, because i think that it’s too early to talk about it and that i might be putting pressure on him, but i don’t want any games or be fooled. i know that he is really busy and it is not just an excuse. situation is very similar to what had been described in a few of the comments earlier. then i went on holidays and the night before i left he came up & we had a wonderful evening together.. which has been cancelled but not hear anything about a visit. it’s difficult because i have a daughter from a previous relationship and he wasn’t too sure about that, but was attracted to me. his status updating from:“interested in meeting women for dates”. he apologized and said that he did panic and freak out because he is afraid to ‘settle down’. just as some people have trouble committing, others are far too quick to try to do so. i did let him know that i would have cell coverage in mexico, and if he’d like to say hello he could. we like to do a lot of the same things, have the same smart a** sense of humor, both enjoy mind games (of the fun sort), have a very acttive sex life, laugh a lot, ecr ect…. i wouldn’t want to be with someone who treated me the way he’s treated you and because of that, i do think you should start looking to date someone else. he held my handhe put his arms round me and we had a lovely time once more. so i plucked up courage and sent txt, saying i had a good day etc but im upset and i needed to talk to him, his instant reply was are u ok, whats wrong. finally i asked him if he has talked to anyone on the site, and that’s when he got really angry that i don’t trust him. we had been together for 4 months at that point so it really hurt. not that you can’t find success, but often this approach mentally “locks” us into continuing to pursue a relationship even when it isn’t that great (and there are lots of other reasons to date multiple people in my mind, but i’ll not go over all that again here).) it’s got nothing to do with how much you mean to him and has everything to do with how his brain functions! i need to just back away for a while and see if he comes to me. we spent our first valentines together and he met my family. i was hurt but more disappointed because he told me that he would never hurt me like my ex s did or any man before him. he really loves you and agrees you are exclusive, the profile needs to come down. have you been 100% open with him on how all this makes you feel? he loves to see you happy and he loves that he can make you happy. so i took a week to decide if this was someone i really wanted to be in a relationship with because we both have kids, and i wanted to make sure that if i commited i am doing so with the intent that i will stick around for awhile knowing we will start to integrate with the children.-phobes and sluts, or shaming their assumed reluctance to be. i have already backed right off and only texted him yesterday after not hearing from him since my birthday which was 4 days before. those of you that ask why about how i found his profile, my friend created a blank account to check her dishonest husband a few years ago, and i logged on (with her permission)…my profile has been down for a long time. but after three years of giving my heart to him i feel that i deserve more than that, i feel that he is being disrespectful and dishonest if he is spending all this time with me and saying he loves me, we are even doing 5 love languages together to help our relationship. except the fact that my bf wanted to date me and see me, but still thought there was someone else out there “better” for him, so he kept the site up. which privately causes me to panic…but i told him i was open to the idea and to talking about it further. i know its wrong to snoop but i did i went on his cell phone and found that he has an open tagged account. we tlk veryyyyyyyyyy veryyyyyyy often and i guess i havent mentioned being official in maybe 7 months :s maybe i should again? i deleted mine because i was sick of the in box messages and found someone (him) that i really liked. we chat and video call almost everyday, and our emotional connection just gets deeper and sensual.’m concerned telling her this may rattle her a bit givien her prior experience and scare her off. the next day, he disappeared and went totally dark on me. i in your situation, i would make it clear to whomever i was dating that absolute commitment was of the utmost importance to me. he finally set up some time for us to talk, but i was frustrated that at this point, he had already given his landlord 30 days notice. monday he contacts me and asks to lock in a time and date. i think that no matter where things actually stand, if you start to worry/stress about things, he’s going to pick up on that and it won’t make things any better.), and one where he claims he doesn't want commitment, the softly, softly approach is more likely to be successful. i know he has read the message and he will contact me when is able to. i agree men need women to tell them how and what they feel since men aren’t mind readers but then, neither are women. i would also like to include in here that she has sent him text messages from her phone, and is talking about setting up a date with him. it is hard for me to see him everyday cause of my busy schedule and i always work on weekends. he is affectionate and kind, all the traits i was looking for. i asked why and he said he wasn’t really feeling the site etc. there was all these messages from the dating website that we meet on. if he is honest and admits to having a commitment issue, could you give him more time? said, if you’ve only been dating for 4 or 5 weeks, i think i’d recommend you just be patient for a while longer. i thought he was nice and understanding, but i was completely wrong. i also feel really guilty for the snooping online i can’t believe i have resorted to this i’m ashamed 🙁. i then handed him the piece of paper and headed for the door. i have also noticed that on his computer he is getting on another site and looking at personals, mostly from other states. i have apologized to him a few times with him not responding too much unless i change the subject to something else. i mentioned before, i assumed we were exclusive when we had that talk and worked things out (in late nov 2013). i asked if we were exclusive and he said yes. what if this other guy he sees has a car and they meet up regularly? convo with me, pretending to be another woman was not flirty, it was more obscenely friendly tbh and he was keen to open a convo, be friendly, (overly maybe) ask for msn or skype…. it’s almost like the allure that a casino has…you might win big but something make you want to stick around and try a little longer. i have read what you have written on this subject and i know you said that men are slower to remove their profiles than woman – so my question is how long is reasonable to wait for him to do this before you say something or begin to feel offended by it? he seemed to show a lot of remorse, and made the comment that ‘he was a dirt bag’. a week and a couple days ago (friday night at the end of his vacation) i went to his hometown for his high school's homecoming football game (the third we'd gone to this season). hes very loving and affectionate which completely goes against the grain of him being emotionally closed off. we met online mid june and became sexua lly active early august. and i think what you’re saying is that what really bothers you is that as soon as you’re done spending time together he’s on the site, right? he wanted to meet me on sunday evening but i couldn’t and then i was shocked to see that he had repeatedly logged into his account. he asked for my msn and said he is getting on with me shockingly well………. i want to pull back from him and stop seeing him, but it’s so hard to do when you like someone. i know he’s been feeling unwell & low lately and my sister doesn’t help the cause. so this was just the tactic he needed to reel me in hook line and sinker! all is fine and then literally no communication for 6 weeks! he has been a total gentleman and he even went into a “domestic partnership” with me on facebook (haha). i am going through something similar and i really hope that you may be able to give me some words of wisdom, advice, anything! i was happy and i told him that and that i liked him a lot. a married man let me tell you even after years and years with a woman i love, i still rarely know what’s going on in her head. similar story met a guy online 2 months ago we meet once a week on the. you can learn more about his personal experience using online dating and running this website here. tbh, i think we were both so shocked at how well we got on, how much we had in common and how much we were laughing. we did have the talk of being bf/gf and being exclusive. obviously what you describe doesn’t sound good (in the sense that it seems like he’s telling you one thing and then says something online that is different to your “sister”). but he did cancel on an invitation to join me at my friend’s farewell on sunday. i try to kind of ask, but he always makes me feel so stupid for asking, as i should (and think) i trust him. he even had me add a tracking device on my phone so i can see exactly where he is at all times. a little reminder on what they’ve already found could do some good…and if it doesn’t at least you can be confident that you need to keep looking for the right guy. he partially admitted that besides much work it was also the constant push from the exgirlfriend which made him feel exhausted and giving up on our close relationship. a few weeks ago we got back together or at least started seeing each other again and were saying the l word and he said that he didn’t want to sleep with anyone else, so we were monogamous. i believed him and since we had such a great and easygoing time with each other, i just went with the flow. it does make it harder him living in london and myself in suffolk as we don’t have what i would call a normal dating relationship which does make it harder.! he then texted me & lashed out saying he had had a bad day & that he felt he was being ‘witch-hunted’ & that he had spent money contacting my ‘friend’ & felt he’d been sucked in. before he left we hugged and talked about being a couple. i deleted my profile ages ago, but this afternoon i had a look and he is still using it. heard from him twice while away – one sentence texts, with no greeting or emoticon – i answered and then he never responded – both times were like this. he once again said it was because of this very intense project he was working on, he told me he wanted me to be happy and that he would make some contact w. was pretty angry at my outburst……that friday i wrote him, apologizing for acting instantly rather than sitting with my feelings and just blowing up on him. his parents are apparently reaaaaaaaally keen on this idea and so are hers. on easter of 2001, i proposed, and in august of 2002, we were married. etc, that he doesn't want to be my boyfriend currently. went through this with my now ex bf i met in july 2011 from match. we haven’t gone on a real date yet because he lives in a different country than mine. that time when we were dating but not committed, i definitely dated and slept with other people. i will add that he texted me at the end of our first date to say he had a great time and proceeded to text me everyday after that. that in mind i wanted to review one of the recent emails i’ve received from a reader and offer some additional advice for this problem. there’s no doubt in my mind she is someone i want to date, be part of my life and take it from there and see where im this goes from there. he even had the brashness to say in his email to this imaginary girl (who was me): ” i am also very honest with my partners, nothing can be built on lies…. i got a strange feeling in january 2014 that something was just ‘off’. i just have no idea what to do anymore…he is acting like everything is good other than my crazy moodiness lately (i think some of it has to deal with him and the other is just a mix of things bothering me).’ve been dating my boyfriend for 6 months but he continues to be active on dating sites. it seems to have disappeared overnight and i feel lousy and worthless. i also said that i wanted to be there for him and support him, and that what he gets from me is honesty and loyalty, but that i require the same. however, if you go another month without any change, i think you might want to keep your options a bit more open as well (and be sure to let her know this in a gentle way as she’s going to be sensitive to feeling like she’s being lied to). this could remove some of your problems but it would also be nice for those who are still dating online and trying to find someone interested (and obviously you’re not! are you ok that you may hurt both of you because opportunities come easier and in catalogue style online? and now my feelings are starting to get hurt (typical girl). it's really tough but rather than sending "i need to talk to you" style messages, i keep in touch with "good morning" or "thinking of you and sending you a kiss" very short messages but never more than two a day. he did many kind and loving things…though he no longer does them. literlally with in mins of saying good nite to me he was online, he disappeared for a few min and then came back up and now his profile was saying he was looking for a relationship, so it went from nothing serious to looking for!
Who is soulja boy dating right now | Ask Logan: We've Been Dating for 9 Months And We Haven't Had Sex
1000+ ideas about 6 Month Anniversary on Pinterest | Boyfriend ’ve had several readers write me after they argued with the man they were dating to ask if i thought they had made the right choice. i tell him i am very busy through the week and can manage saturday. it’s been a wonderful week and i decide to see if he’s up to anything else and low and behold i find him a jdate, jwed, passion, hotmatch, and zoosk. i have not confronted my boyfriend about this online dating profile yet.’ve checked and he’s not been online since i mentioned it so hopefully it’s made him think. i am trying my hardest not to bring this up again, but the recent picture really has me thrown for a loop. i talked to him about it that night, asked him if he wanted to date other people, etc… all the questions other women on here have said. in total i have not seen or heard from him in over 7 weeks and i'm not bothered i have moved on i'm dating i'm happy i told him i was resuming dating and was no longer exclusive with him his colleagues have told me he puts me down alot and says things that will get me in trouble with the boss he still has my things which he can keep i have blocked him on everything including twitter and linkedin taken back all reccommendations and i am happier why did he call me abnormal and act this way absolutely nothing to do with not being able to multi task he had been married for over 30 years he had just gotten divorced = rebound he asked me out to feel good his friend now ex friend and now my friend says he was used by him so he could get near me he was so set in his ways he is not going to change for anyone he has arguments and then ends the conversation with thats my opinion! i let it slide since it hadn’t been in use since 8 jan which was before we had met. however, i do worry that the next time he tries dating someone else he might find himself interested in her and then you’ll find yourself alone. being exclusive means resisting temptation and focusing on the lady you are bedding and claim to be crazy about. try not to force them but at the same time you will want to look for opportunities let him know that you need to know where you stand with him. sex with my now ex-girlfriend after meeting her on a drunken night in the international society at my university. whether his behavior was “just” ego-stroking or serious looking doesn’t matter–i found it repulsive and a waste of a mature person’s time. i agreed, and two weeks went by with no contact. when i text him, he always replies right away and we text until i get tired. have been dating a wonderful woman for over 3 months that i met on match. wud like to add we are both the same age and same religion but from differentt cultures origionally (they are similar)., and yes, i am angry, justifiably, moving preparations are expensive and time consuming. i have met his family, he has met mine and i have come to love his 2 children ages 6 & 9. fortunately, things have been wonderful and things just keep getting better between us. now i know what you’re thinking, and no i am not going to show up and jump out of the bushes. he suprised me first thing in the morning with an execpected visit, we went to a braves game that we had scheduled a week before and then he invited me to spend the night at his place. met this guy online and we exchanged numbers and texted each other 2x a week for a month. we ended up spending a few days together just hanging out and having sex., it is possible that he just likes getting emails to stroke his ego and isn’t looking for a relationship. he partially admitted that besides much work it was also the constant push from the exgirlfriend which made him feel exhausted and giving up on our close relationship. i saw that his profile was still up, which was a bummer since he said he would take it down and he hadn’t. he is gone the third day only, and when he arrived there he texted me that getting a wifi hotspot is problematic, but that he would figure it out. only that, but the sexsearch profile showed that he had been active on it in the last 5 days. easier access to women and men verses the old fashioned way of courting and meeting. i would talk to him: let him know you want to be exclusive and see what he says. recently, another woman is doing the same thing on his facebook and it makes me wonder if he’s doing the same thing to me yet again. we got very close and danced in sync with each other. to me, he sounds like a guy who can’t admit when he’s found a good thing and wants to keep his options open…but this sort of thing is only going to make his life (and yours) more difficult. he said he is so excited to date and see me, and already planned where our date would be. ive been with my boyfriend 3 months, we spend every weekend togther and plan to do things. i meet this guy on a dating site 3 months ago and we do have feelings for each other. instead i think if there is no mention from him after 6 week i would find it easier to just ignore him & move on to dating over guys. (i dont think so cos we hav met without sex and because we tlk about everything for months now). are tricky conversations and can be difficult to work your way into. i have tried to keep my “option open” by staying on the site – but it just makes me feel bad…. or just let it go and don’t make a big deal of it and just focused on our relationship? i have no shame in making sure after i had been lied to once to check again to be sure. we had an amazing connection and he made me his girlfriend about the second time we hung out. thirty minutes after that call he texted me and told me he would call me later and he would talk to me soon. finding out the basement roommate and he actually did have an intimate relationship after swearing up and down since july that he never touched her was the final straw of many in the red flags and numerous chances to be honest. had put my profile back on and started looking as well. no relationship talk at all, just random chat and laughing. i didn’t respond – later he texts me ‘i’ll come over’…and then again ‘i’ll come over’. and then he asked me to accompany him to his brother’s girlfriend’s b’day.” ( he’s talking about my profile) so that bothers me since we haven’t had the talk yet. he talks marriage, knows my ring size, and talks about our future and potential children.. my friends usually ask me for advice and yet i can’t seem to think clearly for myself. have said to him that if he likes, he can continue dating but he needs to tell me, so that i can do the same.’ve been talking with a man i met on a dating site for a couple of months now. he had told me earlier that he wanted to get off the dating site. do wonder, how would he react if you had an active dating profile online? past 3 days have been really wierd, we were suposed to go see a movie together after i was off work and i hadnt heard from him since noon, had texted him quite a few times with no response. i doubt asking him about being friends would scare him off but at the same time you wouldn’t want to repeatedly make him uncomfortable about where you stand so i’d recommend just accepting things as-is for now. then in febuary, i was at home and i needed to use his computer to chek and email. i have even offered to show him how to delete it but that conversation always ends quickly. met a coupld more times and then slept together, its not something i do easily at alllllllllll, it just felt right at the time. we were chatting on aol instant messenger and she said, 'if it wasn't so late, i'd ask you over for a beer. in looking back, he never specifically agreed to be exclusive – i made that assumption that since we talked about it, and then continued to see each other, then that was the agreement. i try and not let these things effect me but of course they do from time to time, my friends are always telling me i need someone who is going to be there for me…a superman…and yes this guy has understood things, told me i could talk to him, however recently their was another family episode and my guy wanted “a break” ok. – honestly it’s hard to judge your situation because some guys just have trouble committing. it’s like things just continue to get better and better every day. if you’ve read a lot of my advice you’ll know that i do see dating one person at a time as problematic. would then suggest that if things are still going well between the two of you in a few weeks that you let him know that you would like to be girlfriend/boyfriend and see what his response is. i played stupid and said i had thought that was the plan from the start. lied when he said he added pictures to his profile just to see if i would notice and to see if i was still online. that evening i was hanging with a friend, but he and i spoke on the phone and he seemed more down than the day before and told me it was home stuff and work was bad. am thinking of giving him a few weeks and see what happens but at the same time i am concerned as well and confused as to why his profile is still active and he often logs on. he told me to have a great time and be safe. i assumed he got cold feet and freaked out about the ‘exclusivity’ talk we had. my current so and i were reluctant to start a serious relationship for a while for a multitude of reasons — we have quite a big age difference, i had just gotten out of (and cheated in) a relationship, he just got out of a marriage about a year before we met, and we worked together. it hadn’t come up again, and i hadn’t thought much about it. i could honestly envision us together for a long long time, and it just came as a blow. we met on a dating site and were surprised to find that even though we live in a small town we had never met.. i ask for a proper goodbye and he hugs me and hesitates to kiss me……. if you want to take a stand and draw the line at 6 weeks, i’m okay with that. three days later he called me and asked me if i was mad. offers friendship to you because he hopes he can succeed in being your friend and that he will no longer disappoint you. while we were saying goodbye he asked me out and i agreed. i’ve planned to take her to do painting of an ocean area with an artist and then a picnic. i get it and i will be patient and understanding., based on his responses to your previous questions, i get the feeling if you were able to prove he was using the services his response is going to be a strong one (and to me it seems like the wrong person is getting angry! the main thing that has catapulted my casual sex relationships into committed relationships is shared experience with someone who was truly my friend and with whom i had great sex. upset, he asked me later what was wrong and i told him. day 3 he texts me and apologizes for his coldness and tells me that i don’t deserve that. logic aside, i would ask any reader who has this issue the same thing i asked the woman who contacted me: are the two of you exclusive and have you both made it clear that you are only interested in dating each other?.and during all this, we are both still active on the dating sites….” doesn’t have to be confrontational, just you getting clarification on where he’s at. gets busy at work and you fall out of sight and out of mind. hes not that into you he will forget you exist until he needs either company or sex keep your self respect if he doesn't reply to any effort you make to contact him move on to someone who does care and who will treat you right have some self respect and act on it you will find someone who will treat you better. he has written a free online dating guide to help others find success with online dating. he left the next morning and texted me later that day. – that he could go back online without telling me – this feels like he is going behind my back in some way – though the forum is public so of course i then think the act of going back online means he is making a massive statement that he is no longer interested instead of having the respect and courage to say so to my face… if you know what i mean. he said that it was everything about me that turned his heart around and brought out the person he used to be a long time ago, and that he absolutely did not want to lose me. week three we went out and he said the big “l” word to me. finally i admitted to him that i did have strong feelings for him and when about deciding what to do about my boyfriend.’m still very interested to hear your thoughts and advice. just don’t do so in a confrontational way: just let him know you care about him and you need to know where the two of you stand. might be something relatively harmless (such as an ego thing and nothing more). i get that you can view profiles for free… but my thing is that if a person is into you seeing you more than once a week – nine times out of ten you have nothing to worry about… dating more than one person is not something most guys are good at and let’s face it… it is too damn expensive.. i put his hand on my chest and said ‘omg! after 6 months of dating, he still introduces me as a friend to people he knows when we go out. he said he hates the fact i always have to leave and wishes i could stay at his place all the time. it’s awkward now because i don’t really want to confess and say that i created a “fake” profile because of my own insecurities. we had the most incredible night (no intimacy) and i felt so so so comfortable. he wanted to meet my girls while we were having after work drinks but i told him it’s not a good idea since it’s our girly ritual & we don’t get guys in there. do you care and need to open a wink or email once you are exclusive? i had been on a few dates from the site, and was just about to lose interest completely when i met him. but my daughter has this thing where she loves to look at his pictures and since his phone is touch screen and she is only 3 she sometimes hits other buttons, well about a week ago she opened his browser and ended up on the exact dating site i am talking about. re-enable your profile, let him know that you no longer consider your relationship exclusive but you hope to continue to date him, and then start looking for other guys to date. are some very interesting posts here and you give great advise..I add him on a new account and he gave me an email address i didnt even kno about. he’s been too busy to delete it and also his friend is using it to find women. i decided to send him a text just saying "hi" and tell him about some good news i received. that for the first time since his divorce, he is ready for a full on commitment, and that it just took him a really long time to get there.